Common Traits at BJD lovers

I think we probably do. We are the people who don't believe you can be too old for toys.

 

Keeping the inner child alive is important. I also think another trait of BJD lovers is that they are creative people. Not necessarily creating stuff themselves but they appreciate it and understand it to at least.

 

I think it just encourages stereotyping to list "common traits" of BJD owners. Other than the fact that we all like BJD, I think BJD owners are practically as diverse as the global population itself. I've met BJD owners who certainly do not collect because they're trying to keep their inner child alive and who definitely do not have a "look of innocence" on their faces or in their eyes. Not all doll owners are creative. Not all doll owners are big kids at heart. Not all doll owners are sweet, happy or nice. Yes, I have met owners who do value imagination and play and who do have a kind of innocent joy, but I don't think that's a fair categorization of BJD owners in general. To try and pin down the common traits of BJD owners is like placing BJD owners into some kind of category. It's almost as if we're saying "Oh, all doll people are like this" and then go on to list a bunch of stereotypical nonsense. I, for one, don't like to be categorized. I may in fact have lots in common with some other BJD owners, but I'll bet there are plenty more out there who are nothing like me at all. Each person's experiences in the hobby - and with life in general - makes us different from one another and therefore unique and beyond categorization.

 

^ That.

If anyone said I had a "look of innocence" about me I would laugh. Hard. I'm no child -- not even at heart -- and I'm definitely not all sweetness and light. I am also not a hands-on creative person. There's only one commonality between all BJD owners: we all love BJDs. That's it. Everyone approaches this hobby differently, and that is what makes this hobby incredible; there is just so much variation in how we look at things that it creates a multidimensional, rich experience rather than the flat one-note that would be the case if all owners were the same.

 

That is exactly my point. ^^

I am a creative and playful person with an overactive imagination. I somehow doubt that I have a look of innoocence, though, and I'd just roll my eyes at anyone who tells me that I do. Sweetness and light...not so much my strong points. Everyone's going to be different. I would definitely agree that the only true commonalities among BJD owners are that we're people who like BJD. Even our reasons for liking BJD aren't going to be the same.

I agree there's a distinction between the simple state of owning something and what you do with the thing you own, but even in ownership of BJD there's diversity. Some people only have - and only want - one doll or a few dolls. Others, like me, have moderate-sized collections. Yet others have absolutely huge collections. Some people want dolls of various sizes while others only want dolls of a specific size. Maybe some only want NS or white dolls while others (like me) want a whole rainbow of resin colours.

There are a lot of stereotypes already out there about doll owners, a number of which are reinforced by popular culture. Some people assume that doll owners are lonely introverts who use their dolls as substitute friends, substitute children, etc. There is a stereotype that labels doll owners as weird or creepy and even one that labels us as "perverts". Another assumption about BJD owners is that we're all manga-reading, anime-watching otaku who are completely obsessed with Japan. I am not denying that there may be someone somewhere who does have one or more of these characteristics, because I don't know who's into what. What I'm saying is that even though those stereotypes may seem crazy and far-fetched, generalization of any kind is bad for the people who participate in the hobby. That's why it's so important not to talk about commonalities, categories or what doll people are like. People who own BJD aren't "like" anything. We are all unique people.

I realize you've never met any BJD owners in real life, but think of it this way. You must know people who are into other things such as music, computer games or sports, right? Would you say that all people who are into music are a certain way? Would you say that all people who like sports are a certain way? Are all gamers alike? I am sure we would all say no to this, because people who like music, sports or games are just as different from each other as people who like dolls. The things they have in common are the fact that they are human and they like music, sports or games. It would not be fair to say all people who like sports are competitive and all people who like hip-hop music are social rebels. It is equally unfair to make those kinds of generalizations about doll owners, even if they are "nice" generalizations such as all doll owners having a "look of innocence" about them. Generalizations are unhelpful. They don't help people learn what other people are really like, but only reinforce ideas that lead to misunderstandings.

If you want to know what individual doll owners are like, then that is the question you might think of asking. Instead of trying to fit people into a neat category, why not ask what attracts them to this hobby and then see what kind of answers people share and which ones are different? Respecting diversity goes a long way and I think you would get some very interesting answers.

 

I think everyone is different and that's valuable in it's own way. Personally I prefer to surround myself by positive and creative BJD owners.

What is interesting to me is that the "stereotype" in this case is fairly positive. I understand not wanting to be categorized and be seen for what you are, but when what you are is not exactly positive I wonder about whether being categorized wouldn't just be better.

There's a difference between an inner child, and being mature. I've met several people who's inner children are completely dead, but who are totally immature. and vice versa.

 

The point isn't whether the stereotype is a "good" or a "bad" one. There are no good stereotypes. Stereotypes obscure the truth and deny individuality. Maybe some people are okay with relinquishing their individuality to a stereotype, but I personally think it's undesirable, no matter what the stereotype is saying. To me, being categorized is never better than being myself. True, some aspects of a person's personality and life may not be "good" (as you may define them) but it serves no purpose to deny it.

Maybe I'm not the sweetest person and maybe I'm not innocent (which you might label "not exactly positive"), but why would I pretend to be that sweet and innocent person when I am not? Why would I simply sit back and allow myself to be labelled by someone else's idea of what a doll owner should be? Could I change myself and be a different person? Sure, I probably could, but there are some things that are difficult - or impossible - to change. Yes, I have an active imagination and I love to create, but that doesn't change the fact that I'm rather jaded and don't suffer fools gladly. I don't consider myself mean-spirited and I try to be nice to people, but I'm definitely not Pollyanna. The fact is, doll owners are all human beings with characteristics both desirable and undesirable according to others. Labelling, categorization and stereotyping of any kind is unproductive because unique humans should never be forced to fit into a mold just so everything sits right with somebody else's perception of how things are or ought to be.

And yes, I do agree that there's a big difference between having an inner child and being immature. Those, I think, are two separate ideas entirely.

 

Whilst I agree that stereotyping isn't productive I have to say that everyone is creative to some degree. They don't have to make anything but they can appreciate it. Creativity encompasses the many things in life (food, music, fashion, media, art, architecture etc) and I have yet to come across someone who doesn't appreciate creativity.

 

I have not met many doll people, but those with whom I communicated live, were very sweet and pleasant people, always smiling, as if between us there is a very important secret, we share the charm of communication with the real miracle. And this is a common thing that unites a lot of people in this hobby. This is one of the reasons to be in this hobby - to be among people alike you and share your good emotions. IMHO

 

Here's the thing -- positive, in this case, is entirely relative. What one person considers positive -- let's say that sweet niceness thing -- another person might consider to be cloying and unnecessary. SapphireStargazer is right -- there is no such thing as a "good" stereotype, because stereotypes by definition erase individuality. You (general 'you') can think sweet innocent niceness is a positive stereotype; I consider it a highly negative one because that's not who I am. I'm definitely not innocent, I wouldn't characterize myself as terribly sweet, and I'm not always the nicest person because I don't sugarcoat my opinions. This is not negative to me; it simply is, and I've no desire to change it. To place that so-called "positive stereotype" on me is to erase who I really am, and that's negative.

To me, being myself is positive. It doesn't matter if you (again, general 'you') think some of my traits are "not exactly positive"; that's your right. What is not your right is to try and force me into an arbitrarily-declared "positive" shoebox, just because you think I look better in there.

 

I'd like to think that there is a creativity that runs in the bjd community that you don't find in other "collector" communities. It's about the "art" of making the doll a realization of your imagination. The face-ups, wigs, eyes, clothes, photography...it's all wonderful.

As far as stereotyping...mountain out of a mole hill.

But Moor Romeo I would caution you to be mindful, as you've probably already discovered in this thread, that some people do not want to be viewed as a nice person.

That said...Like Czechmix has said surround yourself with those people who will be positive with you...it sounds like you have. You'll enjoy the hobby so much more.

To sum it up I'll leave you with this sage proverb
"Insecurities are loudest".

 

I'm not upset at the idea of bjd-owners being in-touch with their inner child and being friendly and up-beat. I but I do agree that not all bjd owners are like that. I've found that the ones I've meet have been very nice and enjoy dolls, but we're in a social situation where you're not going to hear someone being mean unless there's some person who is a bit under-socialized and rude, and many people have come across them, apparently. (I haven't, and I've been going to meetups and doll cons for 10 years. Everyone has been nice as far as I could tell.)

I do think there is creativity involved in bjds--whether appreciating the art and style or shelling a character or actually styling clothes and sculpting or doing faceups. But as someone else said, there's some creativity in just about everyone.

And I do think the only thing anyone can say for sure about bjd-owners is that they like some bjds.

 

Common traits in the bjd community (online & in person)…yep I see them. Do I notice similarities among bjd collectors (online & in person), yep I sure do. I think as collectors of dolls we share a similar interest (dolls) and I think people who collect "things" share a similar trait (collecting). I know many people who don't collect anything, nor do they have a hobby.

I love sharing a common interest especially when it's an expression of creativity; being a part of specific doll thread discussions, sharing the excitement of new dolls and reaching creative milestones. I also love reading projects journals, face up critiques threads and watching how something progresses...so yep, I see commonality.

 

Most of the irl doll friends I've made over the years have all been pretty snarky and silly and mad creative. But that goes for all my friends, into dolls or not. Those are just the type of people I like to be around. I know there are other types of people who love bjds, I just don't spend as much time with them.

 

Somewhere around here there's this thread about testing personality traits, and I found it quite interesting to see some types seem to be more common among BJD owners, but then again, this might be coincidental, same with the innocent (haha), inner child aspect - it almost calls out for an empirical study. Anyone up to it?