Falling out with your dolls? (Un-bonding!)

This is an interesting topic!

I don't think I've ever fallen out with a doll that I've adored from day one. When I've sold dolls they're usually ones I've not bonded with all that much anyway.

Rather than feel I've broken a bond with a doll, I get interested in my other dolls instead. So it's not as much that my current favourite falls out of favour but that another doll in my collection catches my eye more and I spend more time with them. It always comes full circle though. All my dolls are my favourite at some point!

 

I had that happen a few years ago. There was a doll I put together from LE parts from different events. The body was the last thing I got, straight from the company. The experience ordering from them was bad, and even though I loved all the parts, and the work I had put into them, when I finally got the body it all fell apart. It was strung so tightly that I couldn't get it apart at all, and had to cut the string to get the new arms on. When I finally had it together, even though I had liked it apart, I hated it almost instantly. Several friends told me to wait a few weeks before putting it up for sale even though I was done from day one, so I did....and started hating all of my dolls from the same company that it was sitting with. I kind of flipped out and sold all of them. I just couldn't stand looking at them anymore, and looking back, I know it was the fault of that one doll, and probably because of the problems I had with the company while waiting for the body.

I did regret selling them. I bought one again (and then recently sold it again....heh. Not meant to be I guess.), but one of them can't be replaced...and I wish I'd at least kept his head.

I also agree with Jescissa. Usually there's nothing as dramatic as what I described....I just get caught up in new dolls and don't do anything with the old ones for a while. It doesn't mean I don't like them, it's just new doll fun. I've been totally infatuated with some new dolls I've gotten in the last few months, but recently dragged out some old favorites to become re-enamored with

 

I'm still waiting on my first doll, so I can't speak from experience, but I can't imagine UN bonding or even not bonding to begin with. I get really attached to all my things even stuffed hello kitties haha.

 

I have to agree with Miss rebekkuma! I don't know why I get so attacked to all my things, but even my stuffed animals, barbies, MH, ect. If I loved it enough to spend money and buy it, I can't ever see myself "unbonding" with it!

 

I'm not really a "bonder", so that's never been an issue for me... But I have sold off dolls with traits I didn't like (Most of my BW Cerberus Project dolls, for instance. After a few years of having them, I decided that I didn't like the way their resin aged-), as well as dolls that I just flat-out got tired of having around. Some of those were dolls I had liked a lot when I first got them, but over time had grown less and less fond of.

I don't think there's anything wrong or odd about that... We're human. We're allowed to change our minds.

 

I don't do bonding, but I have just stopped liking or wanting to own dolls that up until then were my favorites. Feelings change over time and that is perfectly normal.

 

It happened to me with my msd DM boy. I was saving for DM SD Kara Klum and got impatient and noticed the DM MSD Issac boy. He was cheeper and looked close to the same. So I purchased him. When he arrived I loved him. I kept him for a while but he just wasn't what I had in mind for the character I needed him to be. I ended up selling him and re-saving for the Kara.

I also fell out of love with a Puki. Saw them on DOA. Loved them, got caught up in the Puki craze... and purchased one. It arrived and well.. after the first day or so I found myself just having no idea of what to do with it. I tried face ups, clothing, eye changes, wigs... nope just couldn't find the excitement that I had with the DOA fandom. After a month I ended up selling it.

My two stories.

 

it's not so much un-bonding as it is out-growing, for me. I wanted my MSDs to be SD so I found the closest sculpts, and then for my el, I still love him and won't be selling him, but I need a new sculpt for the character. It's just part and parcel of being a growing human, I think. We all change the older we get and our tastes will change, what's new and innovative changes as well.

 

YES! This is an interesting topic

This happened to me recently and I had a pretty big collection "overhaul". In my case, I had dolls that I purchased years ago when I first got into the hobby. The problem was that a lot of these purchases involved an ex, like they helped me buy them as gifts, shared birthdays, we talked/planned/were excited together.. So after we broke up it was just a lingering dislike attached to the dolls. Even though I initially adored them, because they had those memories I eventually had to give up and let them all go. I feel better with my collection now, and have learned that all my dolls and purchases should be kept private to avoid something like that happening again. Otherwise, I do sometimes rehome dolls, but its mostly because the initial bonding didnt really happen or the doll was otherwise neglected and my tastes changed. Live and learn I suppose!

 

I have one doll I'm having a bit of trouble with. It's my wife's fault, not the doll's. We've disagreed about wig & costuming on this doll since it arrived! I've dressed it to my preference part of the time, but my wife always comes in to readjust something or accessorize "Miki" in a way that I feel just looks wrong or out of character. My wife has pretty much left the others to my preference. She and visitors/ guests have favorably agreed that those dolls are all well presented. So I will just shut up & let my wife do pretty much as she pleases with"Miki": the one DDdy we have. I do mentally apologize to "Miki" (Miko) occasionally as I pass her, so the "bond" is intact. I trust she'll continue to be amiably tolerant.

Regarding those who argue with a doll and lose;... I'm concerned for you!

 

I've sort of had this happen to me. I'm not sure if I'd call it un-bonding so much as my interests/tastes changing but I have sold dolls that I've loved before and have found not so much interest in lately.
I try the usual new faceup, wigs, eyes, clothes etc but if that still doesn't fix it then they move on. I try not to see it as a big deal even though it can be a bit upsetting. I try to think of it as a way for me to see more dolls without spending a whole lot of money and having way too many dolls XD

 

I don't really understand what "bonding" means to most people, so I don't use that word, but I have definitely lost interest in certain dolls over time. The main reason for me is that I realize that my feelings for a particular doll are much weaker relative to how I feel about the others. My first doll was a Bobobie Tony, and I liked him when he arrived, but once I started getting more dolls, I liked them so much more than Tony that looking at him made me a bit sad. To me, it's like if you find a great brand of jeans that fit you fairly well, but later find a different brand that are way more flattering to your figure. Assuming you can afford several pairs of jeans made from the brand you like more, you'd likely have little use for the older jeans. So, assuming they're still in great condition, it makes more sense to donate them to a shelter rather than have them cluttering up your closet. Of course, dolls retain some value (unlike most jeans) so most people would try to sell them rather than give them away.

Do you ever have actual proper arguments with your doll and believe they have done something wrong or do you maybe just lose interest?
I'm not sure what this means. How could a doll (or any other inanimate object) do anything wrong? They can't act on their own. Though I have read about people who are having a bad day, and then see their doll smiling at them, so they get angry with the doll. Is that the type of situation you're referring to - that when the facial expression doesn't match what you're feeling, you get annoyed with the doll? I can see how someone might buy a smily doll when they're in a good mood, and then get irritated by the sight of it when they're depressed/angry. I have gotten annoyed at a smiling doll in the past, but I felt quite silly about it. Hmmm, actually I can see that happening with a sad doll too. Let's say you're sad, see a sad doll, and think "What do you have to be so sad about? All you have to do is sit there looking pretty all day!" I don't talk to my dolls at all, but maybe some people do?

 

I am very emotional about my dolls too and usually fall in love with them. As we learn and change both in life and in our collecting, I think most of us like different things.
I usually keep a doll I loved even if I am no longer " in love".......for the memories. And I feel the un bonding too.

 

What usually happened to me was a change in taste or suddenly a doll came along that was just way better for a character than the current shell, especially when you've been in the hobby long enough this is pretty likely to happen.
Sometimes experience will also make you start to hate a doll, in the beginning everything is awesome and then you start to see all the little faults. Suddenly you realize your doll can't sit, the face looks weird, you never can take a good picture of it etc., and that's the point where everything falls apart.
Some people can live with these things, others can't.

 

Hm, that's interesting. I can't imagine unbondung with a doll. For me it's either bonding from the start and forever, or never bonding at all. I can kind of grow out of a sculpt, this happened a couple times(but also because i didn't think much when buying them), but it's different. Basically i just think that liking doll's face has nothing to do with bonding. It's like you love people - their appearance is never the reason why you love them, there's no reason for love at all. I'm now bonded deep with my hound and i don't even like the sculpt...

 

I'm not sure if it's possible. For me at least. I generally bond with a doll from the minute I open the box. Normally if it hasn't happened I've sold the doll. I'll think they are cool for a while but I realise I just don't love it as well as the others. I can't imagine bonding with a doll then losing interest in it, the bond as been made and will always be.
I have sold a doll I never bonded with to reshell her character, I was sad to see her go because I was attached to her but I just wasn't happy with her either. I don't feel I 'un-bonded' it was more that the bond was never strong enough.

Very interesting topic!

 

Yes! I thought it would never happen either. I have a pretty strong attachment for my dolls and thought I would never ever sell one.

After 8 years in the hobby I finally sold a doll this year. Looking at him, the love just wasn't there any more. I guess my tastes had changed, and I just didn't like his features as much anymore. Couldn't get a right face up, and really hadn't done anything with him in over a year or two. For a while he had been my fav. They all rotate as favorites though!

It was a struggle at first, coming to terms with letting him go, but I realized if I sold him I could get a new doll I would be head over heals with again.
It's recent, but I can't say I have any regrets yet. I don't miss him and I'm looking forward to my new doll. So now i'm feeling more comfortable with the idea of occasionally purging and changing the collection.

 

I chalk it up to a learning experience lol. Only not because I tend to repeat the things I do in this hobby that I say I'm never going to do again...>.<

I'm glad you love the new girl! It's funny because I also got the doll that cause so much strife in my collection again this year in a different skin tone XD this time he's WS, which I prefer, and a new character/look/everything, with a different company's body and I have no issues with him at all! Definitely wasn't the head/sculpt I had a problem with....