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Sharing a friend's doll? (blurring the lines of doll ownership)

Feb 7, 2012

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    1. Have you or would you share a doll with your friend or claim them as your own? I'm not talking about stealing a doll (obviously, that is wrong!) but maybe going in with a friend to buy a doll or trading dolls back and forth frequently to "visit"?

      Example:
      Between my friend and me, the entire 'story" is made up between our dolls. Hers complete my characters' stories, mine complete hers, and a few wouldn't even exist without hers and vice versa.

      It's not just about the characters, but we kind of share the dolls too, frequently mailing them back and forth to each other, and treating each other's dolls as our own. I don't think any differently about taking one of her dolls out and about or doing basic maintenance (cleaning, brushing wigs, velcroing a wig, adjusting a loose eyelash, etc) than I do on my own. It's not unusual for one of us to buy or make something for the other's doll just because the doll needs it or it would look good on him.

      In the end, my dolls are technically and legally still mine, hers are still hers, but we'll often refer to them as our own. (like, I'll claim her BBD Waltz, even though he's technically NOT my Waltz; we have an OT baby doll that is my character, but her doll, but staying at my house) On some specific dolls, we've even agreed to let the other know first if we decide we want to sell the doll, giving the other the first chance to buy the doll and character.


      So....

      Do you or would you share a doll by splitting the cost (true dual ownership)?

      Do you or would you share a doll by letting someone else choose a character for your doll, or by creating a character for theirs?

      Do you or would you share a doll by creating your own character for your own doll, but relying on another person to "complete" the set and letting the doll stay with them as much as he/she stays with you? (or by having their doll at your house/trading off)

      If you do share a doll (in any form), are there certain guidelines you won't cross (something you'd do with your own but not theirs)?
       
      #1 CloakedSchemer, Feb 7, 2012
    2. Do you or would you share a doll by splitting the cost (true dual ownership)?
      I don't think I ever would. I have a bad history when it comes to keeping friends. If anything were to happen, it's possible I'd have to give up on a doll I love and I prefer to spare myself that drama.

      Do you or would you share a doll by letting someone else choose a character for your doll, or by creating a character for theirs?
      Absolutely not. The thing I love about this hobby is that I can do whatever I want. I don't mind taking advice on certain things, but in the end it's my doll and I decide what happens to it.
      I have never had someone ask me to design their character or anything, so I wouldn't really know about that, but I suppose I wouldn't mind. Unless it was a character I would get attatched to and the owner would do things with them I wouldn't do, I wouldn't be very happy. And yes, that is very petty, but that's the reason I don't meddle with others in that sense.

      Do you or would you share a doll by creating your own character for your own doll, but relying on another person to "complete" the set and letting the doll stay with them as much as he/she stays with you? (or by having their doll at your house/trading off)
      I have always seen this as a very selfish hobby. It's to make me happy, not anyone else. Personally I have an abundency of creativity to put in my dolls, so I haven't found it nessecary to include someone else in the character building. I have talked about it with people, but only about very general ideas and no in-depth things.
      The main thing I enjoy about the hobby is the customizing and taking pictures of my dolls, and yes, there's some people of which I wouldn't mind them borrowing my dolls, for whatever purpose. I know they won't mistreat them or do anything I don't like to them.
      But the backgroundstories of my dolls aren't that developped that they go out and get involved in other people's stories. Sometimes I would like this, but most of the time I'm just too fickle to stick to one thing and I can imagine that's really annoying if you had a set story for your dolls ;)

      If you do share a doll (in any form), are there certain guidelines you won't cross (something you'd do with your own but not theirs)?
      I haven't borrowed anyone's doll yet, but I just have some general rules when it comes to handeling other dolls. I'm pretty rough with mine, I'm not gonna lie, but when I am working with someone else's doll, I don't hold them by limbs and such and always support them while carrying them.
      Character wise, I wouldn't do anything that wouldn't fit them. If it was a straight male character, I wouldn't photograph him with a lot of other male dolls in 'inviting' positions. It's not something I would do either way, but it's just to illustrate. If a doll has a character, you have to respect that. It obviously means a lot to the owner of the doll.
      I think it depends on the friend you are sharing with if you can do pranks and such, but in general I just don't do anything that might offend the owner.
       
      #2 Snow, Feb 7, 2012
    3. I would NEVER "joint own a doll" in ANY case, unless it was somehow to do with some weird business I owned with a friend, and even then probably not. But other than that, I think it's a dang awful idea to joint own something as expensive, small and personal as a BJD.

      And heck no I would never base a doll on a friend's "character", unless it was so entirely awesome I didn't think I could ever come up with anything cooler. Even then that person would not have any "special rights" or privileges with my doll. It's my friggin' doll. I was the one that paid half a thousand bucks for it.

      I just do not work well in groups. I don't like other people's ideas invading my own, and I absolutely don't like sharing my expensive, awesome and personal things! A BJD is just something I can not "partly own"! Kind of like underwear!
       
      #3 Xuchilpaba, Feb 7, 2012
    4. I think it would be weird sharing a doll with my friend. We'd probably think different about the character coming down to hair, eyes, clothing, etc. We'd have to change that every time the doll changes their temporary owner.
      And what if we care about our dolls in a different way? Maybe my friend wouldn't want me to take the doll outside? Maybe my friend would be ok with stains on the doll but I wouldn't? We'd argue a lot. :(
      Since we both have our own dolls, we don't have to care about those problems. :)
      One of the things I like about my dolls is creating their character. I wouldn't want a doll where someone else suggests the character that I have to stick with. I'd be happy to tell my friend what I think the doll's personality might be like, though. I never do that, though. Because she likes to give her doll a "life" as much as I do. :P
       
      #4 Laoky, Feb 7, 2012
    5. Do you or would you share a doll by splitting the cost (true dual ownership)?
      Nope. I grow very attached to my dolls and like having them around always.

      Do you or would you share a doll by letting someone else choose a character for your doll, or by creating a character for theirs?
      Nope, hehe. It's a very personal thing. ^_^ I don't think I could become attached to someone else's character.

      Do you or would you share a doll by creating your own character for your own doll, but relying on another person to "complete" the set and letting the doll stay with them as much as he/she stays with you? (or by having their doll at your house/trading off)
      Nope.

      Now sharing a story with another person's doll and my own doll is entirely different. That, I think I could do and enjoy if we were both on the same page.
       
      #5 DenaliWind, Feb 7, 2012
    6. Do you or would you share a doll by splitting the cost (true dual ownership)?
      I myself like to have my things be entirely mine. I'll admit I'm maybe a little selfish about things like that, but in my mind it just raises a lot of questions. What happens if one owner damages something? Do they pay for repairs? Or do both owners go splitsies on that? What happens if one owner gets the doll a faceup and the other doesn't like it? What happens if one owner suddenly wants the doll all to themself? Or doesn't want the doll at all anymore?
      Then, for another aspect, I've seen many times, where friends can have a falling out and never speak to each other again. If I had a friend and I shared dolls with them, then we had a falling out, we would both need to split things up, I suppose... It would be like a divorce then, with all the splitting things. Like, who wants to take what, who actually paid for xyz item, maybe one owner will be mean about it and try to ruin things for the other owner, or will refuse to give up something.
      Then if both owners wanted to keep going with that storyline, they would need to re-purchase dolls and accessories that the other owner kept in order to have the complete collection again.
      Or they could drop that story totally, and need to come up with their own story, which could still involve a lot of hassles with buying and selling dolls and accessories.
      So, in my mind, there are way too many variables involved that could bring problems to the situation, so I personally don't like the idea of dual ownership.

      Do you or would you share a doll by letting someone else choose a character for your doll, or by creating a character for theirs?
      I share a storyline with a friend; we have our own dolls and create their characters, while we both developed the world they live in. Together, we also develop their inter-character relationships. But for the most part, our dolls and characters could stand on their own. We share the characters and backstories with each other as we create them, and we then both build upon those characters and their backstories to develop other aspects of our own. For instance, one of her characters is aloof and standoffish to everyone in general. I then used that information to further develop one of my characters. My boy was already supposed to be a generally helpful, noble guy, but I then added a bit to his backstory that makes him try really hard to be nice and overly accommodating to my friend's character, to try to get him to open up and not be so grouchy - kind of a troubled teen/mentor situation. So, even though neither of us created the other's characters, they still meld together to form a nice cohesive story.

      Do you or would you share a doll by creating your own character for your own doll, but relying on another person to "complete" the set and letting the doll stay with them as much as he/she stays with you? (or by having their doll at your house/trading off)
      This goes back to being selfish. :P If I created any part of the character, I wouldn't want someone else to add something that I didn't want, or dress them 'wrong' in my eyes, or change their wig style or eye color.
       
      #6 AirimirOfGondor, Feb 7, 2012
    7. Do you or would you share a doll by splitting the cost (true dual ownership)?
      No I don't, and I never would. I really dislike the idea of it. I don't even like the idea of a doll given to me, in case I need to sell it or do something with it that the original giver didn't like. All my dolls are paid for with my own money and as such, it grants me the right to do whatever I like with them.

      Do you or would you share a doll by letting someone else choose a character for your doll, or by creating a character for theirs?
      Again, no and no. And again, I hate the thought of it! I don't need people to come up with characters for my dolls; I have enough imagination to create them for myself! And I would never presume to create a character for someone else's dolls. They might not like the character, or they may do things with it that I wouldn't like. Once I've created a character, it's mine. I don't mind people drawing influence from my characters, but to copy it or somehow inherit it from me seems weird, a bit like farming out your own children.

      Do you or would you share a doll by creating your own character for your own doll, but relying on another person to "complete" the set and letting the doll stay with them as much as he/she stays with you? (or by having their doll at your house/trading off)
      No, no, no!! Urgh, can't think of anything worse! I do know of people who do seem to pretty much share dolls, and if it works for them then that's fine, but I couldn't handle the idea of someone else projecting their own characters into my dolls. I've had my dolls staying with other people while I wasn't there to "take care" of them, but there was no story-sharing or anything like that involved. I don't even really like other people's characters interacting with my dolls because they live in a very specific time and world that doesn't really go well with other people's characters.
       
      #7 Harlequin-Elle, Feb 7, 2012
    8. Do you or would you share a doll by splitting the cost (true dual ownership)?
      Sort of? Most of the dolls in my house are mine. Some I got for myself, others my husband got for me, some we split the cost of. The one doll that's currently his was a gift from me to him, but I'm the one that does all the work on her, and will on his future dolls, too, with his input.

      Do you or would you share a doll by letting someone else choose a character for your doll, or by creating a character for theirs?
      Again...sort of. I have a few dolls based on characters either created by my husband (like my Minifee girl) or that he has helped me to create, as well as dolls that are characters that are strictly mine. All characters were created for role plays between us, or stories I, he, or we wanted to tell that I have liked enough to bring into a doll form, to re-tell their stories with, once I have enough of the 'casts' to do photo stories with them. Characters that are his I take his guidance when working on, buying things for, and sewing for. And often for photo shoots, too. But I also do a lot with them on my own, as he says I know the characters well enough to do so. My husband's current doll is actually based on a character a friend of his asked him to put into a story he has been writing that we all love. She's one of my favorites to plan outfits for because her style is so bright and random, things work for her character that not many people, if any at all, could pull off.

      Do you or would you share a doll by creating your own character for your own doll, but relying on another person to "complete" the set and letting the doll stay with them as much as he/she stays with you? (or by having their doll at your house/trading off)
      Not an issue with me, as the only person I 'share' dolls with is my husband, so the dolls are always in my home.

      If you do share a doll (in any form), are there certain guidelines you won't cross (something you'd do with your own but not theirs)?
      Nope. Everything I do with my dolls I'll do with my hubby's doll(s). When the doll or character is his, I'll ask him about things I want to do, buy, make, or what have you for them, but I don't treat them any differently than I do my own dolls and characters.
       
      #8 Ayas-Shadow, Feb 7, 2012
    9. Do you or would you share a doll by splitting the cost (true dual ownership)?
      I don't and I'm not sure that I would. What if one of us moves away? What if one of us get's more attatched to it? What if I see taking care of a doll as different than my friend? I just see a lot of pent up annoyance and resentment in that.

      Do you or would you share a doll by letting someone else choose a character for your doll, or by creating a character for theirs?
      No. I would not want to impose a character on someone else's doll. I'm not saying that it is rude, but it feels rude to me. The closest I come to this is asking opinions on a name, but I usually only ask my husband or my mom. They're very good at picking names that suit! Now if we're co-creating these characters that's different. Bouncing ideas back and forth to come up with a pair isn't the same thing as someone saying who my doll is and what she's like.

      Do you or would you share a doll by creating your own character for your own doll, but relying on another person to "complete" the set and letting the doll stay with them as much as he/she stays with you? (or by having their doll at your house/trading off)
      The first half of this is what I would like to do with my best friend. I think it would be cute if we had a pair of minifee woosoo vamp girls, or even if one of us had the oe head and the other had the sleep head. She really likes vampires and I think it's a cute little doll! I do not know if I'd want to let my doll stay over at her house for the simple fact that I'm incredibly possessive! XD

      If you do share a doll (in any form), are there certain guidelines you won't cross (something you'd do with your own but not theirs)?
      It's not really applicable, but I would not do anything with eyes, hair, or clothing *unless* they specifically told me I could. I'd also prefer mine not to be changed. ^^;
       
      #9 silverholly, Feb 7, 2012
    10. Nope. 'Couldn't do it... Too territorial. Too possessive.

      I couldn't even deal with the "shared-world" backstory-thing for long, so I know there's no way I could really share ownership of the doll itself.
       
      #10 Brightfires, Feb 7, 2012
    11. Do you or would you share a doll by splitting the cost (true dual ownership)?
      No, I would not be able to do that. In the end, I would offer her the rest of the money (in case we buy a doll together because neither of us had all the money since that's the only reason as to why I'd split the cost of a doll). I'm 100% picky and perfectionist when it comes to BJDs. I want to do anything and everything I want with them without having a second opinion/authority. I share my anime DVDs and books with my brothers but I don't let them touch my dolls when I'm not around (they're locked in my room), same with friends.

      Do you or would you share a doll by letting someone else choose a character for your doll, or by creating a character for theirs?
      No. Like I said above, I'm very picky and I need to bond with the dolls according to what I've planned for them or how they make me feel. Letting another person choose a name or personality/background for one of my dolls would completely kill the purpose. I accept recommendations or ideas but in the end it has to be completely my own.

      Do you or would you share a doll by creating your own character for your own doll, but relying on another person to "complete" the set and letting the doll stay with them as much as he/she stays with you? (or by having their doll at your house/trading off)
      Again, no!! >_< I'm imagining how I would feel if I give one of my boys to a friend even for one day...and no...never.

      If you do share a doll (in any form), are there certain guidelines you won't cross (something you'd do with your own but not theirs)?
      Can't do that. I want my dolls to be only mine.


      @Brightfires said exactly what I wanted to say in a few words!:sweat
       
      #11 yumi~, Feb 7, 2012
    12. Do you or would you share a doll by splitting the cost (true dual ownership)?
      Nope. I need actual ownership to be clear with something that costs this much!However, I do have a doll that I paid for the body of, and a friend paid for his head. We intend to share the body for use in pics until she wants to get a body of her own for the head.That way we both get to use this big expensive doll body for two characters instead of one.

      Do you or would you share a doll by letting someone else choose a character for your doll, or by creating a character for theirs?
      Nah. Character is personal. I have however "coached" a friend on an outfit style so she can include her doll in storylines we work on together that I have made the setting for.

      Do you or would you share a doll by creating your own character for your own doll, but relying on another person to "complete" the set and letting the doll stay with them as much as he/she stays with you? (or by having their doll at your house/trading off)
      Heh, One of my friend's dolls stay here almost as much as she's at home. That's because I have a sewing machine, though, so my friend leaves her doll here to make it easier to just pop up to my house for a crafting day. I'd be totally fine with leaving any of my dolls with her, too. We trust each other and both know dolly care. Two of our dolls are kind of an inseparable romantic pair, so sometimes they go visiting to the other person's house.

      If you do share a doll (in any form), are there certain guidelines you won't cross (something you'd do with your own but not theirs)?
      I would never take her dolls outside or out to do anything with them without her permission. Just the basic respect for a friend's possessions, really, no specific rules.
       
      #12 Rosslyn, Feb 7, 2012
    13. I don't believe I would care to share ownership, even with my sisters. Besides, they could buy their own, if they wanted them. I didn't share my childhood dolls either; that's why I still have them, safe and sound, in a cabinet.
       
      #13 linakauno, Feb 7, 2012
    14. Do you or would you share a doll by splitting the cost (true dual ownership)?
      I probably would not. The only way I could see doing this is if I was in a relationship and lived with the person, and even then, I don't think I would unless the other person brought up the idea.

      Do you or would you share a doll by letting someone else choose a character for your doll, or by creating a character for theirs?
      I might help someone shell their character in a doll if they wanted help, but I would not have a doll of someone else's character or have my character in another person's doll. hmm... the closest thing I have done to this is with one of my friends I met through Rping. Two of our characters adopted a kid, and she is getting a doll to be that kid, but I think as he gets older, she will have most of the control over the development of the character. I will have some in that one of my characters is a parent, and his personality will influence the development of the child character, but I still think it's her character and her doll.

      Do you or would you share a doll by creating your own character for your own doll, but relying on another person to "complete" the set and letting the doll stay with them as much as he/she stays with you? (or by having their doll at your house/trading off)
      hmm. Some of my characters have become locked into the stories of the characters of another person, but we did not invent them together. I have kept her dolls, and she has one of mine right now. I guess I would and do this to some level.

      If you do share a doll (in any form), are there certain guidelines you won't cross (something you'd do with your own but not theirs)?
      I don't really share dolls, but with the person whose dolls I have kept and who is keeping one of my dolls, we have never discussed guidelines. I asked her before doing anything with her doll, and she asked me before taking mine out for pictures. I think we just realize it is not our doll even though it is sort of in our possession for a time.
       
      #14 louiselle, Feb 7, 2012
    15. I could never joint own something so expensive with someone. The last thing time I lent something expensive to a friend (a clarinet), I never got it back, so not making that mistake again. My things are mine. If someone wants a BJD, they can get their own. My dolls don't really have a developed backstory and any doll I buy is primarily a pretty thing for me to look at and sew things for, so there's no need for character sharing.

      Any BJD of mine lives at my house unless it is being customised. If my friend wanted to make something for a doll of mine, that'd be fine, but it wouldn't be a lend, it would be me seeking her aesthetic/sewing services for a limited time, after which my doll would come home.

      I wouldn't trust even my best friends with one of my dolls. I wouldn't mind having interlinking stories, if I was into that kind of thing, with the caveat that each character/doll should be able to stand on its own (allowing for stringing tension).

      In a nutshell, MINEMINEMINE.
       
      #15 Lami, Feb 7, 2012
    16. Do you or would you share a doll by splitting the cost (true dual ownership)?
      All my dolls are dual owned really, the costs for all the dolls in our house were split between my girlfriend and I. And we both like all our dolls, but there are dolls that are very much mine and very much hers.

      Do you or would you share a doll by letting someone else choose a character for your doll, or by creating a character for theirs?
      I guess I consider all the characters my dolls are based on collaborations. Mostly between myself and feral5, but also some are sort of a joint creation of myself and River.

      Do you or would you share a doll by creating your own character for your own doll, but relying on another person to "complete" the set and letting the doll stay with them as much as he/she stays with you? (or by having their doll at your house/trading off)
      A few of my dolls have visited/spent a fair bit of time in England with my friend River. My Bygg is actually the "daughter" of her Euclase and spent several months with her while I had her Migidoll Ryu here with me.

      If you do share a doll (in any form), are there certain guidelines you won't cross (something you'd do with your own but not theirs)?
      Um... yes and no? I mean, everything I've done to my dolls I've probably done to my friends'. Painting, modding, etc. But I wouldn't do it without being asked.
       
      #16 sleep_pattern, Feb 7, 2012
    17. To all questions, my answer is "No."

      Just by taking a quick look at civil/small-claims court, it is easy to see how quickly a friendship could be destroyed as soon as someone disputes ownership in shared property.

      I'd borrow, sell, buy, or trade dolls with friends, but I'd never share one.
       
      #17 Doll-Mage, Feb 7, 2012
    18. I tried sharing my characters and their world with someone else once - it didn't work. One reason was that I was simply way more invested in the characters than she was, but I have to confess that I'm also very possessive of my creations. They all have a bit of me in them, and nothing someone else does with them is going to feel right to my mind. Even if the other person's ideas are good ones (and I'm sure other people have better ideas than me), accepting them requires me to take distance from my characters in a way that I just don't have in me. I think that I, like yumi~, would eventually offer to buy that doll so I could have it all to myself, or buy a new one.
       
      #18 Sigune, Feb 8, 2012
    19. Even if I did have a doll, it would be very hard to have joint ownership of one with my doll friends, mainly because of distance(my bestest dolly friend isn't even in the same state as me). Besides that, I don't generally like the idea of someone choosing the personality of my doll for me. Sure, I'll take suggestions for names and background history, and sometimes I'll even ask for help with them, but that's really as far as it goes.
       
      #19 Reine-de-scorpion, Feb 8, 2012
    20. We come sort of close to this is my house. <3 While it's clear who owns what doll, for the most part they are all somehow involved with each other. It makes selling very difficult when you can't bond with a doll! But, in the end, it's all the decision of the actual owner.
       
      #20 Britain, Feb 8, 2012
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