Wrong Hobby or Wrong Doll?

That's not easy to answer, and only something you can decide for yourself. If I were wrestling with these questions, I'd put some thought into following points:

1. Do you enjoy participating here on DoA, even if you mainly read without posting much?

2. What inspired you to get into this hobby and buy your first ABJD? And once you recall that, ask yourself what changed, and figure out why.

3. If you think it's your doll, why not try imagining your dream doll...no matter what the price, because money is no object when it comes to your dreams. Does the idea of a different doll excite you? If so, then it may be that you need another doll, or a friend for your current doll.

4. Do you have fun playing with your doll? Changing it's clothes? Buying outfits and accessories for your doll, or just thinking about it?

5. Have you been really interested in other hobbies, and then dropped them as something new caught your fancy?

It's perfectly fine to take a break from this hobby, or any other, you can always come back to it. But if you're planning on selling your doll, I'd urge you to give the points above some serious thought. If you're not absolutely certain of whether or not you want to stay in the hobby, and you rashly part with your doll, you may not be able to buy the same model again in the future. And even if you did, it would never be the exact same doll. Good luck with whatever you decide.

Juli DC

 

Sometimes it takes some experimenting, and some buying and selling before you find the doll "genre" for you. You may enjoy a doll that is smaller or larger than the one you currently own. One may also prefer fantasy over realistic, or vice versa. Also, doll tastes change. Don't be afraid to sell a doll if it just doesn't feel right. If you are still interested in the hobby, then use that money to put towards another doll. Sometimes I get burnt out from doll-related stuff, so I take a break. Sometimes I won't buy doll items for months at a time, and they will stay in their boxes until I have the time and energy (and most importantly, money!) to work on them again. The main thing is to have a doll you enjoy

 

First thing I'd ask is why did you originally join the hobby? Sometimes (and I'm guilty of this, too) we see all the things you can do with these dolls - photostories, sewing, face ups, modding - and we want to do it all. Sometimes, you find that you can't do everything you originally set out to do. I decided that I'm not the biggest fan of doing photostories, so I stopped doing them. I'm very timid about doing a face up, still. Don't be disappointed if you find yourself unable to do absolutely everything you set out to do. Also, a lot of these things take some time to do. Don't beat yourself up if you have to keep putting things off because you have no time right now. This is a hobby, and you have the freedom to move at your own pace; setting a deadline for yourself is going to make it seem like work and not something fun. I think we sometimes get wrapped up with what other people are doing with their dolls, and worry that there's something wrong when we don't make the same effort

If you are worried that it's you not jiving with the doll, don't be afraid to try some different styles/looks. Some people find that going from one style to another helps shape the 'personality' of the doll. Sometimes a doll looks better to the owner in a very dark/gothic style rather than a lolita style, or vise versa. If you find that absolutely nothing is working, then don't be afraid to sell the doll.

 

For me, it was easy to know I was in the right hobby. I had many doubts at first, spending so much money on my first doll and what not, but eventually, she came home and I forgot every worry and doubt I had. I thought that every single cent spent was worth it and till now, I don't regret getting in the hobby~ (I do kind of regret collecting so fast till now...u~u;; )
If you don't like your doll, sell it and try to get something else you like, see if you'll like playing (whatever that means for you) with that one, if not, you can try again and again. Some people just can't find the right doll for themselves with trying only a few sculpts and/or sizes. You should try bigger or smaller, maybe that's what's at fault.
In my mind, if you think it's worth all the trouble, then you're in the right hobby, but just haven't found the doll for you yet. If you think nothing of this is worth it and would much prefer just sell your doll and move on to some other hobby, then it's the wrong hobby for you.

 

The best thing about this hobby is, you can always sell your dolls. I've felt like you on and off at times too. It's something you can always come back to when you feel refreshed. It's either something you enjoy or it isn't.

 

Well, you've only been in the hobby a few months. Give it time! If you still enjoy looking at dolls, thinking of future possibilities, keeping an eye on what's going on in the doll-world, etc, then don't give up too quickly!

 

I'll try not to sound too off but... if you have doubts maybe this just isn't the hobby for you. If you question your decision to get into it, this isn't the hobby for you. If you regret the money spent on your dolls, whether it ends up being something you like or not, again, this isn't the hobby for you. When I finally took the plunge into the hobby I knew what I was looking for, if only for the sheer amount of money involved it's not a hobby to get into recklessly. So if you are, in fact, having these doubts, better switch to something else while there's still time.

On the other hand, after doing a brief research on your history, you appear to mostly chase after minifees. That might as well as be your problem. Stop thinking of what's popular and what many people like, it just might not be the doll for you. It might be the sculpts (yes, people make some gorgeous ones, but there are also gorgeous dolls from underrated companies). It might be the size, because some people are inclined to liking one size more than others.... In general, start looking around, there are a lot of smaller companies than those that are easily found on the top all the time, you might find the doll that is right for you in them if you as much as give them a chance. Find a doll that you like and customize it in whichever you way you think you'll like it best. In the end, nothing else matters and remember to have fun.

That's all from me. Peace out~

 

You can also try just taking a break. I've done that, when I sometimes feel overwhelmed.

 

I disagree with this, actually. I daresay most people in this hobby, especially those who have been in it for years, have felt all of these things... and are still here. Everyone has doubts sometimes, whether they're buying a doll or about to walk down the aisle. I know I've questioned whether it was the right thing to do to buy this or that doll, or even if I should be in such an expensive, time-consuming hobby at all. The reason I'm still here is because I love it and I love my dolls, but I do know I've definitely felt that doubt before.

 

IMHO, it's the wrong hobby if you're consistently not getting any pleasure out of it. Hobbies are the enjoyable things we do that add value to our lives. Sure, there may be frustrations and annoyances, but those should be momentary. The positives should far outweigh the negatives, the joy and pleasure should outweigh than the money/time sacrifice. Otherwise, why do it at all? Life is challenging enough as it is without a hobby adding to it.

Like Harlequin-Elle said, everyone has questioned themselves about their hobby obsession. It's perfectly natural to question and doubt and evaluate. But I also agree with Soenatte -- if you always have doubts, can't stop worrying about the costs, if the hobby has become dead weight instead of lightening your life, then you have to seriously think whether BJDs are worth your valuable time and money.

How to determine this? I recommend taking a hiatus. It's easier to see things when you've taken a step back to the "10,000-foot perspective", but harder when you're in the thick of it. So put all your dolls in their boxes and hide them away for at least a month. Also put Den of Angels and all your BJD bookmarks away for that time too, and do your best not to look at dolls or think about them. Do something else with your life. The whole point is to put things out of sight, out of mind, and I suggest a month because it takes 30-40 days to gain or lose a new habit.

If after a month, you're feeling less pressure, more happy, life is better, a load is lifted off you, more time/money to do other things that actually are fun...? Then maybe this IS the wrong hobby. But if the hobby still draws you, you find yourself still thinking about your dolls, and if unboxing them after that month brings a smile and excitement... why not keep persevering! And if you look at that one doll and feel either frustration or indifference, maybe the problem is with the wrong doll.

It's entirely normal to be a bit frustrated and annoyed in any hobby. And it's worth pushing through the frustration and challenges, because the feeling you get when you overcome a challenge is totally worth it. But if all you get for your effort is frustration, disappointment and discontent, if you seldom or never end in any pleasure... this defeats the purpose of a hobby, and I think you should find something more worthwhile to do.

I speak from experience. I had lots of frustrations with my dolls, and ended up taking a hiatus for more than a year. (To be fair, I was also going through a tough time IRL.) But I kept thinking about my dolls, and smiling whenever I looked at them... so I knew that this hobby was still fun and still worth being involved in! And I'm still here!

 

Ive been into the BJD hobby for over 4 years, and there was times where I doubted if it was for me.
I just couldn't bond with my dolls, then I got my new girl and the magic is there! I also found that investing even more money into clothing and accessories really ads to the fun and keeps things interesting.

But it might not even be the doll, maybe it just doesn't interest ya.

 

I went through owning many, many different types of dolls throughout the years and it's a tough learning curve for me still, honestly. I can't seem to keep a doll for long and am still experimenting with different styles when I have the resources to do so. I went back to a certain type of doll(s) because the only two dolls I've ever really liked were made by the same company and I'm hoping to rekindle the same motivation with these little guys again.

Also, sometimes I think it's best to take a break to re-evaluate where you stand in terms of priorities. I find that when I mess up keeping first what should be more important, I lose enjoyment in everything else I do.