A female owner of male dolls unable to connect with female dolls

I have many boys and I just got my first girl about last week. I was looking for many wigs and outfits, nothing fit her. In other hand it was very easy for me to find somethings for my boy.

 

I agree whole-heartedly with your theory, to the point I would label it fact for some women (like myself). It's sad, but true.

 

My current collection totals 29 full dolls and 2 floating heads. All of them are male. The 3 dolls that I plan to purchase (in the hopefully not-so-distant-future) are also male. I don't have any plans for any female dolls and I highly doubt I will purchase any. I am female, straight and am even a grandma. One of my boys is actually a girl head on a boy body (Doll-Love God-Enjoy) but that's as close to a girl as I've gotten.

All the dolls I own are characters from the novels I write and I'm an author of m/m erotica so it makes perfect sense in that regard as to why I don't have any female dolls. I have female characters, yes, but to get a doll of one of them? Nah, no spark/desire for that. If I was to purchase a female doll it would either be to complete one of my doll families (and technically speaking, that character is hermaphroditic and genetically male and female and yes, I would have the girl body modded to have boy bits) and the other would be to create a doll representation of the Egyptian goddess Bast, which would be more of an altar item than something I'd play around with.

I'm a gamer as well (I play Neverwinter, a free-to-play MMORPG based on D&D) and I have 4 female and 4 male characters. I have a male and a female for each class I play (Control Wizard, Cleric, Hunter/Ranger & Scourge Warlock) yet my favourites to play are the male characters. It's not a gender-locked game so that has no bearing on power/abilities/gear score etc. For whatever reason, I simply like playing the boys better and my female characters usually end up being in-game cash generators that I rarely take out on missions even though they are geared/armed just as well (for the most part) as the boys. I have been randomly working on 2 of the girls as the level cap was increased recently but they're still lagging behind the boys as far as progression to the new level cap goes.

 

I am very new to the hobby and only have one doll. Although I love her very very much, I do plan on buying a boy next to balance it out. To be honest, I've seen a lot of guys I like but none of them compare to some of the girls I have seen. I think it might be the boy's sculpt I don't know. I think I just enjoy having girls as of right now, but that will probably change when I get more dolls.

 

I almost have an all female resin crew, I have one guy on the way. Just don't really like pretty boys too much. There aren't very many guy faces that I like. But feel in love with Impldoll Chad

 

I also twice have as many males as females, and I attribute that to the dolls themselves. There are so many females dolls that fit a certain stereotype of beauty, and they just don't have much realistic modelling, being basically eggs with big eyes. I really would prefer to sew outfits for females, so I'm looking around for a male head I can turn into a female.

 

When I first started looking into BJDs I was really drawn to male dolls and researched a ton and was trying to find perfect dolls to fit certain characters. I never really imagined myself owning many, if any, female dolls. But when I actually started purchasing and collecting I went all female - I don't own a single boy. There's no accounting for taste I guess!

 

My story i almost the same as Nodivision.
At first i started looking at males because i thought they were so handsome and beautiful.
And they just fit my characters better.

I also looked at the female ones but i just thought they were too cute and childlike.
I just ended up with liking male dolls more.

But i think i will also own a female doll one day ^_^

 

ok never mind what I wrote days ago - knew that was too much thinking for a weekend morning - talking to a friend about BJDs earlier and this is the reason why I don't have too many female dolls: their hands. bjds already have disproportionately small hands. the female ones are worse. then they're in these ridiculously dainty poses, even when they're officially given a giant gun. what's up with that?

 

I find it interesting that several people in this thread have stated they wouldn't want a cute doll, but one that is strong, independent, or intelligent. And those words in themselves are loaded with a lot of sexism.

Why can't a doll who is cute and who has large eyes also be intelligent, or strong, or independent? They are not mutually exclusive descriptors. A doll's character is something the owner chooses and is not locked into place. It's basically implying that only female dolls/characters that resemble a very narrow idea of the Strong Female Character, an archetype that inherently rejects anything considered feminine as weak, are the only ones who deserve respect and the idea that they could be fully dimensional characters. All women deserve respect, not just the ones who display stereotypically masculine traits.

 

^ This is a very good point! Character is about personality - not looks!

As for me, I have a mostly all female crew and am female myself. I'm not sure the deep, underlying reasons for this and I'm not sure I care. What it comes down to is preference for doll aesthetics. I love a cuter, more stylised anime look for my girls generally. But I don't particularly care for this look for my male dolls. I like my male dolls to look a bit more like real human men. The end result that that there are few male dolls that will look good next to my girl dolls XD

And the reason I choose the girls over the guys is probably because I just have more ideas of how to dress and style the girls. They're all like little pieces of me, different parts of my personality expressed in resin. So to me it's easier to have girl dolls. Most of the time I just don't know what to do with the boys.

That said I love, love, love looking at everyone else's handsome boys!

 

I think there is just something about the features in the face that I'm attracted to. I always manage to pick out the boys from a crowd. Once I was looking at owner pictures of a doll, I forget the name but he was in a pretty frilly dress and I was thinking to myself "Wow this is the first female doll I think I really like!" and then I got to the pictures where they were showing off the body blushing... Nope, just a boy in a dress.

For me I think part of it could be the fact that I've always seen myself as kind of a tomboy so I look for that in my dolls?

 

You do have a point. I'll agree that my knee-jerk reaction towards cute dolls isn't completely fair and it's completely true that character shouldn't be judged solely by physical appearance. But the words strong, independent or intelligent are not sexist. They are gender neutral. They are admirable traits in both genders.

Yes, a cute or childlike doll can be strong, independent, etc. Ringdoll's Little Red Riding Hood doll has a youthful face, but carries a really big gun like she means it. But for every cute doll that is marketed that way, there's 10 others that are presented in a more fluffy, I-couldn't-lift-more-than-a-teacup way. As I've said before, cute dolls have their niche in the market. But does it have to have such a large share of it?

Presentation is to be questioned, too. You can tell me that a character is a genius/assassin/captain/badass, but if all the character displays is the direct opposite, then what does the audience believe? For example, what armor-wearing fighter would wear armor that shows cleavage? Sure it looks sexy, but it's really impractical. I have this problem in books, games and movies as well. How often have we been told that a female character can handle herself, yet she STILL has to get rescued by the male hero?

I don't believe that a strong female character has to reject her femininity. She just isn't allowing society to tell her she isn't as capable/independent/smart/etc. as a man. These dolls are starting to be marketed in a way that shows the more resilient, stronger side of women. That is the trend I want to see continue. It's not perfect, and there is still problems, but it's a good sign.

 

I can't do anything with female dolls. Many looks cute for me but I don't know what to do with them...
I once had which, except for one I've sold all. The one that I keep, has a boy body now.

 

I've had a bunch of female dolls, but I figured out that a lot of them are too delicate looking/actually too materially delicate to represent the characters I wanted to use them as shells for. My female characters are muscular and scrappy-looking, which is the opposite of what most female dolls tend to be. I recently decided that the next time I do try to shell one of my lady characters I'll use a male sculpt on a male body to remedy this, keeping the character female. Most male sculpts are just right in terms of looking feminine but a little tough.

ETA: Since it looks like on the next page people are going on about "why can't 'tough' characters still be dainty?" and what not, my characters in particular either (A. Belong to an all-girl athletic team or (B. Belong to a small battalion and participate in a lot of violent slapstick. Doesn't mean they're not feminine, just that most female sculpts don't look as muscularly lean as these girls are considering they're constantly training for sports reasons/throwing tables and various trees at each other because they think it's funny. Doesn't mean they don't like feminine things or aren't hella cute, they're just muscly little scrappers. Being muscular isn't exactly a masculine trait, it's just a trait that unfortunately is neglected when it comes to female dolls. I'd probably fight like eighty boars for a properly muscular lady body.

 

The sexism is in the prevailing idea that cute dolls cannot be strong, or independent, or intelligent because they are cute looking. Strength, independence, and intelligence are completely mental/personality driven qualities. You can't look at a person and instantly know they are any of those things. They are not physical descriptors, well beyond someone who is clearly fit and muscular presumably being physically strong. They are traits that are revealed through a character's actions and words. I've seen people say they don't want dolls with large breasts because they want smart women, as if the idea that a woman's bra size correlates to her intelligence. Those are harmful attitudes.

 

I had the opposite problem for a long time, I liked only female dolls (and am also a female). I just could envision more things to dress them with, and more versatility. I had an MSD sized male doll shortly after I got into the hobby, had him for about 2 years before selling him because I just wasn't enjoying him as much as the girls. Then last year, I decided I wanted a male doll to use as a prop for photoshoots, like a boyfriend for the dolls I have -- within a month of buying him, I then fell in love with a limited edition (also male) doll and bought his head, since I couldn't afford another complete doll so soon. When/if I get a body, I'll have 2 boys. They are both SD, and I find, I really like the SD males. It took me almost 10 years though to find a male doll that appealed to me.

So I guess what I'm saying is, just keep looking You never know when you will connect with a doll, I never expected to have more than one male, but I've already been eyeing a third one now .

There's no wrong or right way to enjoy the hobby though, so by all means, if you only like male dolls, that's also fine.

I have seen the CUTEST dolls on facebook, they're males but the owner puts them in pink wigs and dresses them masculinely, but cutely, in bright popping colors, etc. Had I seen/thought of that before, I probably would have been more open to purchasing a male doll sooner, as it showed me that they are just as fun and versatile as the girls.

 

I cannot agree more.

Never understood the idea of women placing gender stereotypes on other women (well, people on people in general but that's beside the point)...