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Being yourself, being popular, loving dolls

Sep 3, 2010

    1. I think I've got a bit of a different view on this.

      I've never been someone to hide who I am, and I'm certainly not ashamed of my dolls. I, more often than I do on DoA even, post pictures and photo shoots of my dolls to Facebook, a few people express that the dolls creep them out, but then they just don't ever look at the doll pics again, they know when it's labeled what it is. But I'll be honest, I'm less comfortable about talking to other collectors in the hobby. I don't personally have a problem with how others choose to use and play with their dolls, but I also don't find myself wanting to be a part of the community of doll collectors at large. I usually have a feeling of shared camaraderie with people I share hobbies with, but I think this hobby is so different for every person & means something different for each collector, that I only really relate to others in the hobby who share it the way I do. I often find myself uncomfortable at meets as I listen to how others talk about their dolls and just have to nod & smile when they look at me. I remember a particular meet where I witnessed someone ask to hold/take pics of my friend's doll, a very popular mold, and she said that was just fine, she turned around for a moment, then when she turned back, they were posing the doll in all kinds of poses that had him hanging off of other boys, which was something this character/doll would never do. It was a bit unnerving for both of us as we didn't want to be rude or cause a scene and we knew they weren't trying to be rude themselves and didn't see a problem with what they were doing, but she wasn't comfortable with her doll having pics taken like that. This isn't always the case and I've met lots of people I like at meets, but I think I'm more reserved about talking about my hobby to other collectors than I am to people outside of the hobby. It's part of why I only attend a few meets.

      My doll hobby is for myself, it's not for other people, be it outside or inside of the hobby.

      But in the personal/professional issue.... I wouldn't want to work somewhere that I couldn't be myself. XD I actually have used my doll collecting hobby in two job interviews (got both jobs) when they ask me about my hobbies and activities outside of work. XD Also, I currently work at Target, in the toy dept, so I've taken my dolls in with me to look for possible toys & accessories for them before. I don't mind walking em around in public.

      As far as people's reactions tho, I don't think I've ever had a really adverse reaction by someone except for my ex-husband honestly. He really disliked the dolls, he didn't have any creative mindset and didn't see the artistic value, thought they were a waste of money since they certainly didn't "do" anything (so OBVIOUSLY unlike his broken computers sitting everywhere) and refused to even see the collectors ones I have (such as my Soom Beryl) as an investment since some of these dolls grow in value! I was really upset once over the fact that I wasn't going to have the money to get a limited doll I wanted, one that had really touched my heart (Soom Amber, if you're curious) and I was actually close to tears, and he made fun of me, told me to STFU and get over it, it's just a doll.

      It served, later on, as a litmus test for those I date. If you can't handle my doll hobby and be respectful about it, this isn't going to work. lol.
       
    2. Was never popular. Never will be. Don't care anymore.
       
    3. I didn't start collecting BJDs until after I had to drop out of public school. But I was into BJDs when i was in high school. I didn't really talk about it, not because I was wanted to hide it, but just because I didn't need another reason for the others to make fun of me. And I didn't have any friends so there wasn't anyone I could have private conversations with. But then now that I'm homeschooled, I find it a lot easier to make friends with people who have similar interests with me, and among my group of friends my dollies are actually the popular kids! xD
      I have always been open with my family though, I think it may weird most of them out, but they can be happy I'm safely odd.
      I really don't see why dolls cause so much controversy though. I mean its just like any other hobby, only the people in it will get it, but at least others can appreciate it. I don't think anyone should have to hide it
       
    4. It's part of why video games are still a somewhat "nerdy" hobby, because most people see us clinging to dolls or nerds clinging to games as childish, refusing to let go of toys and grow up. It's ignorant, but thats where the hesitance is rooted.
       
    5. Having never been popular, I guess I never had to worry about it. Most of my friends have their own weird hobbies and already know I'm a freak, so if they did learn about my doll collection, I'm not overly fussed about their reactions. It's just another toy in my collection, a bigger, more customizable action figure. It probably helps that I'm an adult now (as weird as that is...), so people tend to be less judgmental.

      =^__^=
      Anneko
       
    6. I'm in middle school and started collecting bjds in the 7th grade. I just tell my friends that they are photography dolls- models- not toys
       
    7. I'm not sure if I was just in with an awesome crowd in high school [when I first got into dolls] or what, but I was open about it and my friends supported me. I even got another friend into them too and she got her own.

      Even people outside of my own group of friends were really cool about it. For example, I did a project on abjd once, talking about what they are, how customizable they are, what sizes they come in, how much they are, etc etc [basically a dolly 101 sort of intro that fit the project guidelines]. Later that day in my last class I had a girl, who was in the class and saw the presentation, ask about them a bit and another girl [who hadn't seen the presentation] got interested too. I showed them a picture I had of a girl I was waiting for then as I had it in my binder, and they both thought she was really cool. Then I told girl 2 the price. xD She was a bit taken aback but understood, as her handbag had cost as much as my doll, so even though it wasn't the same sort of item, she understood shelling out hundreds for a luxury item.

      So even people I wasn't really friends with were pretty cool about it, and no one in the class said anything bad about being in HS and collecting dolls, so either I didn't hear it or no one really thought too much of it. I dunno, I've just always been open about my hobby and been lucky enough to not get any flack for it.

      Even if I take them out in public for a photoshoot or something, people either don't say anything or come up to talk about them and seem kind of interested in them.

      I have no idea how I ended up being so lucky [I've read some horror story-esq encounters @__@] but honestly, I think confidence is a big part of it. Don't act like it's weird or strange and shameful and people wont perceive it as any of those things. The better you act the better your experiences will be, imo.

      Sorry for the slight tangent~
      tl;dr - I've never hidden my love for the hobby and aside from shock at the price I haven't gotten any negative comments about it.
       
    8. In my class (total 23 people) that I like BJD know not many. Two of my friends refer to it normally, but the price is still slightly
      embarrassing them . But my "friend "(I already wrote about she) always laughing about it, and say to other, than I buy doll, it costs 600 dollars and i am not normal. Of course, when you say it to people, they can`t understand situation, they heard price and already did outputs without all details. My class isn`t amicable, but if I distribute it by popularity, I think I`m something like "mis popelarity", how it says in USA.
      I was not interested in someone else's opinion about me and my hobbies:cool:
       
    9. Well, I only recently got into the hobby but I've been an anime fan since Secondary school.
      Since I'm studying a rather "out there" subject in the first place (animation), I've never been thought of as weird. In fact, when I was thinking of buying my first doll, my friends helped me to make up my mind if I should get him(my parents didn't know then).
       
    10. Ahah, count me into the "never was popular" group. I only recently took an interest in dolls, but I think that the friends I had in high school probably would have found it interesting, if not there thing. The friends in college probably would have loved them -- I surrounded myself with friends who pretty closely shared my interests and we were already into "weird and nerdy" things. I wouldn't have had any issue sharing with them.

      After reaching adulthood, I had to move away from all my friends to follow the job hunt. The area's very different from what I was used to. I've got "work friends" who share only a few interests. I haven't and do not plan to tell them about doll-collecting because I'm pretty sure they wouldn't get it -- judging by experience, it would turn into a huge thing that gets mocked daily and told (in highly exaggerated form) to anyone who'll listen. They already think it's insanely nerdy that I spend time on the computer. I won't necessarily be going out of my way to keep it a secret, but I won't be sharing.

      I also hate to say that, at this point, I'm still nervous enough that I won't be taking them out in public. I'm probably worrying too much, but as a professional in a field where reputation is a huge part of success, I strive to maintain that image in public. I totally envy the people who are awesome and secure enough to do what they want without caring.
       
    11. I didn't start buying dolls until I was in university, so the high school-type concept of "popularity" didn't exist. That being said, I have lots of friends who have no interest in my doll hobby, my fashion hobby, or my everything-in-my-life-should-be-pink-or-at-least-cute fixation. I find it more interesting and satisfying to be friends with people whose company I enjoy and who are different from me. I'm also not the type of hobbyist who lives and breathes dolls. There's nothing wrong with being so involved in your hobby, but I'm personally not that intense. The only thing I am hardcore into is dessert. Everyone who knows me knows that I love sweets.

      I don't necessarily hide that I like dolls, but it's not the first thing I talk about. I'll mention it if people are interested--but if they aren't, that's okay. I will not, however, spend time with people who need to make ridicule me. Been there; done that; got the t-shirt. Never again. Thankfully that has not recently been a problem. Even some of my coworkers know that I like dolls, but they don't ask questions or bring it up because it's not their thing. I don't need to bore them with the differences between my dolls and porcelain dolls, or talk about new wigs. I don't make them listen to my blathering about clothing, either. Just bakeries.

      I'm also not the kind of person to take my dolls out in public, because I don't carry them around for the same of having them. It's just something I find fun. I'll transport them to a place for pictures or to meet a friend who also owns dolls, but not to the movies or a restaurant. I like to have my dolls, and I like to enjoy them the way I enjoy them, and I don't want other people's opinions. I'm lucky that my friends are kind people--but if they weren't, they would not be my friends.
       
    12. I've never been really popular, but I wasn't in the ''looser'' group too. I was kinda ''neautral'' :lol: I've really started collecting BJD after high school, so my school friends never got to know about this besides a few ones that I'm still in touch with. I've always had a passion for Anime, Manga etc and bisides some comment about the high price they never said anything bad or good. They respect my hobby and wouldn't dare critisize me for it, as I don't critisize them about their U__U

      But my friends have never been the problem: it is more my parents and my brothers that think that I'm kinda weird and crazy -.- It's hard when your own family doesn't support you, but I don't care cause BJD make me happy and without them my life wouldn't be as colorful at it is now :)

      We are our own life's master and no one has the right to tell you what to do and what not!!
       
    13. I was already out of school when I got into BJDs but all through High school and college those who knew me knew me as the "toy freak". I had Jurassic Park Dinos, Pokemon, Action figures, and plushies and I took them EVERYWHERE. I always figured it would scare away the exact kind of people I didn't want to talk to, and it worked. Don't get me wrong I have a diverse group of friends but none of them are judgmental or closed-minded. Heck in High school when I'd show up at the lunch table we had this game we'd play: What's in Dawn's pocket? We'd make a loud production out of it, taking bets and doing it like a large stageshow then I'd pull out whatever toy I had in my pocket (which varied wildly) and we'd see who guessed closest. XD

      Now I mostly just spend time with my husband who is really just my best friend. He's okay with my hobbies and I'm okay with his. I try to help him find rare transformers and he helps me fix knee joints and sand seams. I wouldn't have it any other way. :)
       
    14. I only started collecting dolls in college, and now I've graduated, so I don't give a crud who knows about my hobbies, likes, etc. My days of high school are long behind me. But I've always been a nerd, and proud of it. Nonetheless, I probably wouldn't have run down the halls in HS proclaiming that I love dolls...
       
    15. ...I pretty much lay down that I won't be friends with someone who can't be bothered to respect my interests, whatever the heck they are at the moment. I really don't care how many friends I have as long as the ones I have are willing to stand by me.

      I dunno. I never was popular and I don't really care to be.
       
    16. Hmm... I guess I'm not really popular, but I come along with nearly everybody. My classmates know that I am an addict for Japan, Anime and stuff like that. But they don't care. I haven't talked about dolls with them, because they are not interested in it. I am not hiding it or keep it a secret, but there is no reason to talk about it.
      But I also had bad experience with peoples reaction on dolls. When I was visiting my boyfriend I met his neighbour and hold Taheisha on my arm. He was asking "What is that?" "It's a doll" "A doll? Haha, did you went to IKEA to buy decoration?" "No, I collect them. It's my hobby" ---silence--- "Okay..." *laughed*
      The friends of my boyfriend don't like them either~ they cannot understand how to spend so much money on them~ they are not getting rude or something~ But I don't feel comfortable talking about it with them...
       
    17. I was surprisingly popular in highschool, though I was easily the strangest person in my class. I kept one of my Taeyangs in my locker for the longest time, and while plenty of people saw it and were pretty weirded out... nobody really seemed to care.

      Right now I only have one doll friend... who's online. One of my roommates hates the idea of me getting a BJD because it's so expensive... the other couldn't care less. XD At work it's all I talk about, and while everyone thinks it's pretty weird... they've also come to expect it from me.

      I really don't care if people think it's bizarre or what. Normal hobbies are boring.
       
    18. I am pretty popular and I don't hide the fact I have dolls from my friends. They think it's cool since I'm a costume design student and that seems like the kind of thing a costume design student would do. Even my friends that aren't involved in theatre think I do a beautiful job on my dolls and think it's pretty neat. I think it's because I'm well dressed, nice, and confident. People accept my dolls because they think I'm an awesome person so my hobbies must be awesome.
       
    19. Let's just say - collecting BJDs (well, not really collecting but I got more than one) isn't my strangest hobby. THAT would be live-roleplaying. *gg* Some of my colleagues here at work know about my hobbies. Some have seen the dolls that I brought along to work (I did so because some of them requested to "see them live" after seeing pics).

      I've always been one of the "odd ones", even back at school. Back then, I was a Star Trek fan (still am) and that's probably where and when I learned not to care too much about other people's opinion of me. I was like "I like it, I'm not harming or hurting anyone by liking it, so either take me as I am or leave it". True friends will always do that and not laugh at you for your hobbies or interests. If someone calls himself your friend and then laughs at you for collecting BJDs - well, then he's probably not really your friend and you're probably better off without him ...

      I do understand that, at school, peer pressure can be quite high. You're like everyone else or you're the one that sticks out and is made fun of all the time. But, well, it's not the "normal" people that make life interesting. ;)

      So - am I popular. Well, my colleagues seem to like me well enough and my friends - dito. Do I hide the fact that I got BJDs? I'm not shouting it from the top of the roofs but I don't hide it, either. I actually got a pic of one of the boys as my desktop picture so people can see him all the time when they pass my computer. And pay attention. *gg*
       
    20. I'm generally out-going with similar-minded people, so I usually get along quite well with others. I told my friends about my newfound interest, and after trying to dissuade me due to the high price, they left me alone. No big deal. True friends care about you, and not something like dolls. It should never be the end of the world.

      I intend to continue collecting and become even more out-going and social in the future. Hope that means that I'll get some dolly spending money somewhere in there. xD