BJD buying FEAR?!(not afraid of the actual BJDs!!!)

Not all owners play with their doll, you know? Some just collect them and display them - or even keep them in their boxes to only take them out occasionally. I'm not much into photography so most of the time, my dolls (something around twenty) just sit around "gathering dust". Doesn't mean that I don't enjoy them, though.

 

brykat, you have problems with decisions, it's normal for young person. You should answer yourself on questions you asked. May be, your Mom makes you fell guilty, but you agree with her for some reason. It's your money, who will suffer if your mother is right?

 

I would just go for it! When it comes down to it, all things are fleeting anyways. Do what makes you happy!
Also, like everyone else said: BJD's are easy to sell! If you do get bored of it, you can always sell it!

 

Explain that it's not a toy, it's a collector doll that is meant to be customised, explain that you'll use it to express yourself and be creative by making clothes, painting the face, doing photography ect.

 

I went through this a little bit. I think one approach is to present the situation to her as: this is something I feel strongly about right now. I have the means to make it happen and this does not have to be a long term commitment. . I can't guarantee to love it forever, just like with everything else in life, there are really no guarantees. But if I do change my mind later I could sale the doll, I don't have to be stuck with her forever. I might lose some money in the process but I think it would be worth it to just have this experience. A lot of times we regret the things we did not try.

Just a thought.

 

Bjds aren't everyone's cup of tea (family members who aren't into dolls tend to let you know), but if you love dolls like you say you do then don't let her stop you. Its your decision, your money, your happiness, your life, and no one else's.
If you do buy the doll you love, its your business what you decide to do with it. Do what makes you happy.

 

I try not to let anyone influence my buying decisions. The price of BJDs was a bit of a shock at first, yes, and there are people who won't understand. If they make you happy that's all that matters! I don't buy them to have them out all the time, in fact I don't mind if I don't take one out in several months or so because they can wait for me. I enjoy them (usually) one at a time, and rotate between which ones I have out. I don't let anyone make me feel guilty about how much they cost, since most of mine are worth more to me in emotional value than the monetary value I paid.

 

I don't necessarily "play" with mine. I dress and paint them then display them. Sometimes have them as a buddy while I surf the web. I still don't see them as a waste of money. I see them as an investment for the future. They're one of the few things I have that actually hold their value monetarily besides jewelry so they should be easily sell-able when the time comes that I no longer require them.

 

It's hard when you're younger to not feel like you have to please everyone around you. In the long run a lot of people break out of feeling that they have to take care of everyone else's feelings, and you realize your happiness is most important.

Now that being said it is a big decision that you should really think about. It sounds like you have been, but make sure you research which doll you want, and keep thinking about it like you said.

 

It's a big investment but it seems like you really want to go for it. You've already proven that it's not just a whim by being interested for a year. No one can say for sure what will happen when you get your doll but this is a great community to be a part of and can inspire you to do lots of things with your dolls. Even if you don't do anything with the dolls for long periods of time they're not going anywhere and will be there when you want to sew or take pictures or go to a con or a meetup, etc...and if nothing else they are beautiful works of art to admire.

 

You won't win with your mother, or anyone else, who has no interest in bjd's or just dolls in general, EVER.

Luckily I don't have to run stuff by my mother anymore, but I don't dare tell my two 20 something daughters how much they cost. Oddly enough my Dad would of thought my dolls were awesome, not because he liked dolls, but because he was a collector of 'stuff'.

Really you just have to make the decision yourself. It's not a bad thing that now you've saved the money yourself for a bjd, you're questioning whether to purchase one or not. Sure you might buy one and get sick of it quickly, but tbh I doubt it. They really are an eternally evolving type of doll. (I still find it hard to call them dolls lol, I consider them my girls)

Plus if you do decide they're not your thing, as long as you've looked after it well you will not lose much money, if in fact any at all, should you decide to sell it on. Just keep the box and all the papers.

Whatever you do don't rush in, which you're not. I was in such a hurry to have my first, I purchased one that to this day I still haven't even put eyes in. I don't want to sell her, but tbh I don't want to do anything else with her either.

 

Like others have said you do not have to play with a doll all the time. Many people just choose to display their dolls and enjoy their beauty. I consider bjds to be a work of art and not a toy. If you buy a sculpture or a painting you do not need to do anything with it. Looking at it gives you pleasure and that is what is important. No one can say how long something will hold your interest either. There are things I have been into and loved for many years and there are other things that I move on from and that is what most people do. Do what you feel is right for you and if you choose to get the doll then do not feel guilty. I know a lot of my friends spend more on a mobile phone which they update every couple of years and no one questions that. Ultimately it is your choice to make

 

brykat, out of curiosity have you had a chance to handle a BJD in person? In particular, the type you wish you buy? If not, is there any local groups, stores or owners locally who might let you take a look at their's? It may help you feel better about your decision to see what you'd be purchasing.

I recall when I was younger and I first discovered BJDs I had a feeling my parents would not approve of the prices. I myself felt I could never part with so much money at once out of guilt. As it worked for me, I ended up waiting a good many years before I eventually bought my first doll. Of course, I am now at a place in my life where I do not have to go through my parents when I make personal purchases like this. Also the fact my interest in them continued for so many years I think was also a strong indicator that I was finally making the right decision.

If you still feel uncertain and/or do not wish to cause issue with your mother, waiting a while longer won't kill you. You have the whole rest of your life to collect and enjoy these lovely dolls. But at the end of the day, it's your money and your decision and no one else's. As others have posted, it's perfectly normal to put your dolls into their boxes or on display. They do not have to be 'played with' all the time to be of use or loved. And of course, worst case scenario, if you find you are not so keen on your doll after it arrives, you can resell it for most of what you bought it for.

 

I've also been afraid to buy more bjds because I'm clumsy and drop things a lot. However, I don't worry about the cost so much as long as I love the doll. I have only a handful of dolls and I adore them. They are so beautiful and special, I'm so glad I got them. I'm sure you will feel the same, so go for it! As long a you don't develop an addiction and buy like 50 of them, I think it's fine to have a few.

Also, I'm pretty good with fixing Pullips, so if you would like my help repairing yours, feel free to pm me.

 

brycat I hope things are going more smoothly with your mom. Since you are only 13, she does have a right to want to protect you and your money from bad decisions. But a good argument to use with her is that there are worse ways for you to spend your money and your time as a teenager. Let her know you love her and respect her, and that you would love it if she could appreciate the fact that you don't do drugs, drink, and hang with a bad group of kids. Your hobby is a safe outlet for your creativity and energy. Maybe if you use love and understanding when talking to your mom about your hobbies and interests, she will start to see your side of it. After all, you are still her little girl, and she wants what is best for you.

 

My big thing about these dolls... It's really not a waste of money. As long as you have a nice face up on your doll and keep them clean.. You hardly ever lose money, if you have to resale them! Bring that to your moms attention.
These dolls really aren't like any other dolls out there. Their a bit magical in a way. I know that people sometimes have bonding issues but for the most part, these dolls are more like family or a child. It might sound weird but it's true.

I started this hobby when I was 16. My mom encouraged me into it. I had a real hard time as a teenager and as a kid, making friends. These dolls brought new friends with it.
To this day these dolls still bring me much joy and comfort. I've been in the hobby for 10 years now.

 

My mom is exactly like that! I always let her know I would buy them with my own money or try to negotiate with her so I can get the rest of the money I need and she always reminds me that it's a lot of money and that I don't do much with the ones I have (even though I've been trying to get her to set up two of mine for sale since I'm too young to sell them myself, also so I can have money to buy ones that I can do stuff WITH). Once I get these two dolls up and sold (my oldest sister is gonna help me), I'll have enough to buy the doll I want. Hopefully.

 

I was very reluctant to buy my first doll, but I decided that I need to sometimes do what I want to do. Plus, this year is my last year in HS, so I feel like I should be able to have one thing that I really want. My family and I skipped up on most of my birthdays ( beginning sometime probably in elementary), Christmas-es... and also other traditional stuff, like New Years. So no presents or gifts.. Truthfully, I don't care but for some reason I feel like I should care about HS graduation and celebrate in some way. And having a doll would remind me of my times in HS.