BJDs as therapy...

When I first started buying dolls, about a year ago, I told my friends and family that I had discovered that it's never too late to have a happy childhood! (I'm 48 and lived through a rough childhood.) I also have fibromyalgia and depression and when I was going through a bad flare up last winter looking at and dressing my dolls when I was in too much pain to do much else was soothing.

 

It's kind of funny that I just found this thread because I ordered my first BJDs a couple of days ago and the day before that, my mom gave me this whole long speech about how I should try art therapy (this was because after a month of pestering me, she dragged off to see the family therapist who usually works with my parents and little sister, and as I predicted, it was a disaster—she has since decided that psychiatry is not for me haha). I think BJDs really are like therapy—I don't even have mine yet, but I feel happier and more relaxed just knowing they're on their way here

 

Wow, welcome to my world -- well, except for the Asperger's -- but I sure can appreciate all of the rest. In fact, I'm scanning down through this thread thinking what an unfortunate cross-section of maladies we all represent in here. Interesting how often one or another of us has not only depression/anxiety/some other of the mental "disorders" that still carry such a stigma regardless of how real they are. And we won't get into how exasperating it is to have IBS. That just is a debilitating thing... flattens you sometimes. But people *will* laugh, won't they. ("eat more fiber." "Thanks, but I'll have to start chewing on the house to get more than I already eat...")

I was reminded particularly of how therapeutic the dolls are last weekend. I got a third shelving unit for my group so that I could arrange them artfully instead of in a big pile. It seemed to take for-flipping-EVER to get them all up there, and I laughed and apologized to my hubby for having such a disaster zone in our room for such a long time -- he said "oh on the contrary. You look happy. It's very therapeutic."

And it was. It does the same thing for me that playing the guitar used to before an occupational injury some 30 years back took that out of my life. I just get in a "place" out of myself and... relax.

I see that or something like that being a common theme in this thread. Something to focus on besides annoying, constant, misunderstood pain.

Hang in there, all!

 

I could totally see this as being theraputic.... I can imagine just going and spending some time with one's doll and immersing oneself in that character and their world, to 'get away', so to speak... I know I would totally do that if I was having a bad day, or feeling really depressed. It's almost like escaping into a fantasy world...and since so many people love their dolls, it's obvious that when they need 'therapy' they'd turn to them. They're like pocket-size friends... well some of them are 'pocket'size' xD I can even seeing myself talking to my doll when he gets here.... it'll be like writing a verbal diary. ^_^ So yes, BJD's are very theraputic.

 

Exactly! If you every feel alone or upset, or like no one will listen, a doll will always be there and they'll never judge you because you're in control. They'll never anger you because they do what you want. It just brings a calming nature over someone, and I know when I was younger and playing with Barbies often when I'd act out situations in my life that I was having problems with, I would find a solution through that unintentionally.

 

I must agree that BJD/dolls in general are definitely depression busters. I know that my Doll/BJD family keep me cheered up and happy. I have to agree with some people on here that I also think it is an ability to have a "control" experience over and over again. Sometimes I think the world outside my front door can sometimes be a complicated and calculated place. The world of BJD is serene and gentle and in enough control to keep my life in balance.

 

Sorry for the long reply.

Now that I really sit down and think about my dolls do represent me in all my emotional states. I have social anxiety disorder, a stress disorder, pcos, and an extreme introvert. I can't stand being around people, even my own family, will suck the live out of me. And that seems from childhood, my earliest memory is being picked on by my pre-school teacher in front of the class and everyone laughing at me. So, now at the age of 26, my mood is based on what other people think. And as a result my feelings are hurt a lot.

Oddly, enough I use my BJD's as a way to wrong through problems. Caleb is an extreme extrovert, he loves people and life. And if someone doesn't like him, he doesn't care. Where as Carmine is mean to everyone and he will talk about someone so bad that, that person will be scared of him. Fiona is super pretty, smart and confident. Arbor is the little girl that I wished I was, she stands up for herself. Sigourney is extremely affectionate and loves to give hugs (which I'm terrified to do for fear of rejection), Olivia is extremely girly and she make friends easily.

And Zooey represents who I am now. Very quiet, sad, needs other people to tell her that she's smart, pretty, or doing a good job. She stays in the background a lot hoping that no one asks her to do anything evolving people seeing her. But, is really angry when everyone goes out and they leave her behind. But, if they do invite her, she's ready to leave after 15mins because they're too many people and to much noise. She really wants a boyfriend, but is scared of affection. She wants to be a painter, but thinks she isn't good enough and so only paints for herself. And she's invented and entire world inside her head where she's an open, easy going person whose always smiling because that's the only way she can cope.

 

I'm glad to know bjd are helping so many people out there.

 

I bought Yourik a few days before I lost my pet hamster of 2 years. She was very precious to me and I loved her dearly. And now that she's not taking up my time I've found myself even more attached to Yourik, I think it's due to my recent loss, because Jacob (my hamster) was my baby girl and even now it hurts to think that she's gone. But Yourik has become my new baby.
Unhealthy you think?

 

Not at all. I wish I had a bjd back when my kitty died... Instead, I spent a whole day in bed, went out, cut my hair and kept going. I think it's actually very good that you have Yourik. I'm glad he's helping.

 

I'm glad I went ahead and bought him, between him and college I haven't had time to think. And at this point, that may be best ^^

 

I have dealt with depression most of my life as well as social anxiety. I only have one doll so far, and only for a month and a half, but having her around is already helping. The Seasonal Affective Disorder usually starts to set in this time of year, but so far I haven't had any problems. The last therapist I went to showed me that I have trouble trusting other people, but knowing that she is always there to for me and won't ever betray me helps to assuage my fears. Now I just have trouble waiting to be able to afford to get her sisters.

 

I'm glad you found a release in dolls! For me it's like going back to my childhood, (where i didnt have a doll so precious) I didn't have much when I was a kid, but i'm not bitter over the fact. But every now and then playing with my doll lets me be childish in this "adult" world. It's like a short trip to a holiday land in my own bedroom.

 

I must say that my doll really makes me so happy...

 

I've already chimed in on how the doll community has helped me socialize-- especially during a year where I've been sliding towards hermit-tude. On a different therapeutic note, I just had a filling and two teeth yanked yesterday afternoon, and I definitely just wanted to come home to dolly cuddles.

I spent some time holding Vince on my chest on the recliner-- he's a really good weight to sort of calm and ground me (and my cat doesn't like to sit on the recliner because sometimes it moves and he gets scared whenever that happens), and while I don't normally sleep with him because I'm a tosser/turner, on the recliner I kind of stay in one place, so I took a Vicodin and a long nap with my boy in my arms. He definitely made me feel better.

=^__^=
Anneko

 

I don't have any of the chronic problems some of you guys are discussing, but I was unemployed when I bought my first doll, and I really think my dolls have improved my financial situation -- they motivated me to become self-employed, so I could save money for the next one. It's ironic, I never bought one when I was working because they were too expensive. But now that I have to buy groceries at two different places to get the best deals, I have dolls.

Also, I've been undergoing fertility treatments for the last couple of years, and nothing was working, and I got my second doll, Sebastian, a Petite Ai, and he was supposed to be a girl so I could make dresses and sell them. But when he arrived I just knew he was my little boy, the one I'm going to have for real someday. So I gave him a wig that was dark like my husband's hair and green eyes like mine, and spoiled him rotten. One day my mom said, "You need to have a baby so you can quit playing with dolls." and I said, "Why do you think I'm playing with dolls?" She hasn't said anything about it ever since.

And, by the way, my treatments are going better now and I am very hopeful to have success in the next year. Strangely, I'm still convinced it'll be a boy, even though I really want a girl to dress up.

 

I've been going though a few things recently. [ A lot better due to councelling, Yay for strangers that are paid to listen. ]

When I get depressed or stressed I used to spend money. Big time. Since I bought my doll, he's not only there for a cuddle when I feel alone and feel like crying, but he also stops me from spending money, because I save for things for him.

Of course, in the long run, I'm still spending money, just..not as impulsively.

He really makes me happy!

 

For the past 5 years my parents have in be in awful downward spiral, and last year their divorce was final. My father is NOT a good person and my mother did nothing but take care of me. My mid to late teen years were pretty sketchy to say the least with my relationship with my father. When he left, I was left to take care of my mother who wasn't very mentally stable because of all of this and my 16 year old brother. (who is now 19 by the way and doing very well in college ^^) I had to grow up very fast. I spent a lot of money keeping our falling apart 110 year old house going. We did alright. Finally earlier this year in May I moved in with my friends. I have my own room, we are like family so it's nice being there. My mom moved in with her sister, and my brother went off to college.

To get back on topic here, in the past 6 months I have bought two Fairyland Minifee's and received a Pukifee as a gift. Buying doll accessories, clothes, and looking at BJD's with my friend that I live with has helped me relive my childhood a little and forget about the past and look towards the future. They are just so beautiful and fun to play. They have helped me a lot heal from what has happened and I can't wait to get more of them ^__^

 

I don't have these diseases or disorders, but if anything, I do understand how BJDs can be seen as therapeutic.

Ever since I was little, I was terrified of dolls. That stemmed from being forced to watch Child's Play when my older cousin was babysitting me. Somehow, other kids in muy preschool finding out I was scared of dolls. They pulled a prank and locked me in the janitor's closet with a hoard of barbies, cabbage patch kids, polly pockets, etc. I couldn't reach the light switch, and the whole time I thought these dolls would come to life and kill me. It seems stupid... but I don't believe I ever felt as petrified as I was during the half hour I sat there mashed up against the door and crying my eyes out.

By a stroke of luck, I saw Volks' Tsukasa's image on the internet when he first came out, and ironically, I fell in love with his story and him in general. There's this special something that I still can't explain today. I saved a fund for him and got him a few years later, and it was all worth it. After spending time with him, my doll phobia went away for good.