Bonding with your dolls

this is something I'm nervous about I ordered my doll about a month ago and she was my 2nd/3rd choice I've heard people sell their dolls if they don't bond with them, it's such a difficult subject but I'm glad that I can read though the many different opinions

i really hope I bond with mine ^^

 

My dolls were based off characters I write about often, so when I got them it was pretty instant, I think. But then again, I'm never really sure what people mean by 'bonding' - I love my dolls, I really do. I love to take them out and play with them, dress them and take pictures; but I don't feel sad when they aren't around and things like that, so I guess I'm a little puzzled about the meaning?

I've found, though, that they all seem to have their own personalities. A friend of mine got a doll whose sculpt looked really angelic, but when he actually arrived he had the most intense case of resting b-word face we have ever seen xD So, needless to say, he didn't work at all for the character she had intended him to have, but he ended up developing a different personality all together.

 

I'd say bonding is at its basic level, just being able to look at the doll and think "I'm so glad I have you". I pretty much loved mine instantly, but my love grew as I played with him and dressed him up and taking pictures.

His personality came through by doing that as well. Pictures especially, since he tended to look especially sassy in them, and even outright annoyed when I took pictures of him before he got his wig lol.

 

For me, the bonding occurs through the circumstances of their arrival here. A great many of my early dolls were essentially the "wages" I earned from being stay-at-home wife and mom to a rather difficult child. They are emblematic of the love and support of my husband, and the appreciation he had for the sacrifices I had made for our family. Others have been gifts from my brother Wotan, because he has an extremely generous heart. The last ones I have gotten through my own hard work and careful saving and planning. There's a sense of accomplishment there, that I can do a thing on my own.

So, for me, the dolls are a tangible reminder of the intangibles of love and appreciation and achievement. That in and of itself can be a great comfort in a dark and lonely place. I need the touchstones to remind me, not just the memory and knowledge. I know that they are just dolls, and could be replaced, but it wouldn't be the same. No other Isao would have the same emotional meaning as the one my mother and husband helped me to get, for example. No other F-16 would be a reminder of the extremely good friends I have made in this hobby.

As far as their personalities, there were a handful of "anchor" characters from a long-developing story that I've worked on and refined for years. Others are straight-up fandom dolls. Everyone else has worked their way into the universe. I only have one at the moment who doesn't have a clear name or personality. I'm a story-teller at my heart and core, and love to have tangible representations of characters.

 

like a lot of the comments above I've found creating and making clothes and accessories for them and discovering what works for them or not works helps me to bond with them. I like to take photos and write short stories. look for questions and attempt to answer them to help me create back stories. I also dont believe a doll can ever get complete their story as like us it is complex and their experiences and what not contribute to them evolving.

 

I set time out of my day to bond with Aya, and to me, I feel like "bonding" means actually using the object that you just payed $400+ dollars on. Nothing is more sad than seeing my gorgeous girl sit unused in her stand for days on end. Usually around 4 or five days, if I haven't taken her off her pedestal and messed with her a bit during the day, I'll cuddle up with her and straighten her wig, fix her clothes, read manga, etc with her. That's the longest I could go without using her though. Honestly, I'll feel more bonded to her when I'm able to get her more clothes and her man friend with her (as in, my second doll) :P.

 

I bond with my doll through customization! Changing the wig and eyes and clothes until I find something I like, and that feels like it fits him, too. At least at first. And the more I've played with him, the more his personality has sort of 'grown'. But thats usually how it works for all of my characters!

 

How do you bond with your doll?
Customizing them! I'm not much of a DIY person, but I enjoy picking out wig(s), eyes and outfits for them and then see how all those things fit together. All those cute outfits are a big part of why I collect dolls, and each of my dolls has their own personal style. Talking about them and sharing pictures with doll loving friends helps a lot too.

How do you figure out your dolls personality?
By spending time with them! I usually have a general idea of what I want them to be when I buy a doll (princess, businessman, whatever) but I don't know their specific personalities until I see them all assembled in person. I tend to get big details right away (for example, my newest doll's only outfit at them moment is a suit and tie, he must be a very formal person. His sister wears lots of frilly dresses and carries a stuffed animal, so she's more whimsical) and then fill in more details as I spend more time with them. Thinking about how they interact with my other dolls also helps.

 

Well, I bond with my dolls by customizing them so that they really shell the character they are. I usually shell characters that are very dear to my heart, that helps a lot with the bonding !
So, they basically already have their personalities before coming home^^

 

I bond with them by making things for them and customizing them to how I picture them. It's hard to explain xD I guess when I saw them they inspired me enough to create a character around them. In general I like creating characters and styling. For the personality aspect it's harder for me to think of a personality or a story so I have gone and looked up writing prompts/ questions to ask your character in order to figure them out.

 

A good way to bond is to write them a back-story, even better is to make up a character before you get a doll and the excitement of having a doll for that character really helps you bond. I have two dolls (third on the way) my first doll I got with no character in mind and I feel like the bond isn't as strong as the bond I have with my second doll who's a character I have had in mind for years. Also keeping a journal has helped me, I write down their stories, plan out their look and what they are interested in. Making things for them also helps.

 

How do you bond with your doll?
Doing their faceups, restringing them, changing their clothes, eyes, wigs, taking photos of them, giving them a hug when I'm down, watching movies with them. - Taking photos is important, the more photogenic they are, the happier I am with them. Some have horrible faceups or just don't show up well in my photos. Those I've taken a less liking to.
So far, I've only really bonded with 3 of my dolls. Mostly because I've spent more time with them. The others are like strangers to me. As in I wouldn't miss them if I haven't seen them for a while or if I sold them. But the 3 that I've bonded with, I kind of need one of them close by, even if they're just lying in their carrier bags. I guess having the comfort of one of them nearby is important to me?


How do you figure out your dolls personality?
They're already characters in my stories. Some have been fleshed out for the past 20 years or so.

 

Eisai is a huge anime geek so some times we snuggle in bed together while watching some on netflix

 

I ... hang out with them? I bought one of my boys second hand and pretty much kept him exactly as his last owner had him! The only thing I changed out were his eyes I bonded with him just fine and then recently I got another girl second hand... I will be changing pretty much everything about her... redoing her faceup, changing her eyes, a new wigs, new clothes. It was easier bonding with her once I took her previous owner's customizations off and she became more of a 'blank slate'.

I have one doll I mistook her head mold for another one's and I considered selling her but the more I thought about it, the more I came up with a character for her, so I opted to keep her

So I guess to answer your question, I need a character for the doll to bond with that doll and I'd rather have them blank than looking like someone else :3

 

How do you bond with your doll? I guess it's all about customizing, and figuring out the personality and story of the character; that's a big part of what makes me bond with a doll. Besides, spending time with them, taking them for photo-shoots and arguing with them when they do not want to pose correctly... that's the kind of things that I do with my dolls and the reason I love them so much.

How do you figure out your dolls personality? Most part of my dolls are based on characters previously designed so I do not usually have problems with that. But one of my dolls, my boy, didn't want to fit his designed character when he came; so I had to redesign him trying different wigs, clothing style, personality ideas... and he ended up reveling himself.

 

For me I don't know if this is what constitutes a bond for people. But I get close and like my dolls not by hanging out with them but by dressing them and thinking of their backstories and relationships. I have written stories all of my life but when I got my dolls I didn't make them any of my preexisting characters. Rather they took on their whole new universe that is contained in them. And the more dolls I get the more the universe expands. I like that

 

Having issues bonding with my first and only doll. As far as bonding with your first doll, does it usually take longer to bond with your first doll in comparison to the second, third, fourth, etc? All the backstories I have written feel not quite right for him. I feel a little disheartened. I can't figure out his style so to speak.

 

@Raselikat sometimes dolls just don't cooperate with the character you first have in mind for them. One of mine didn't cooperate at all, but I like the doll enough to want to keep him. I'm just waiting until he tells me who he is. I'm going to try changing his eyes, wig and faceup until it's right.

 

@mollym That's kind of what I've been waiting around for too. ^^ I feel bad though, 'cos he's my first doll and I can't really connect. I'm going to keep trying the same thing. Maybe even get a different face up. I think that's the main thing for him. Thank you for responding to me. I appreciate it. I'm new to the community.

 

At first I was thinking, "I don't?" when asked about bonding. But that's not exactly true.

My first doll was a gift from my best friend who hates all dolls with a fiery passion. I will never forget that. I love Emily with all of my heart because of how precious she is to me. I've treated her like a daughter.

With my other dolls, I originally bought them just because I liked the sculpt. The "bond" is the characters I've built around them. Each one is a facet of my own personality that I can't express (because seriously, you can only do so much). One is a mori girl, one is a tomboy, one is super girly and wears only pink, and one is a fashionista and dark and sultry. I have plans for a very elegant young woman who plays violin and studies French literature, a cat girl, a magical girl (she's on layaway), a gamer girl, a little girl who is afraid of growing up, and two elves who share the role of heir to the elf kingdom, one who is the princess of daylight and one who is the princess of moonlight (I have one head, one full doll on the way, and I need a body for my floating head). I also want to have a pretty boy that hates being bullied but refuses to change who he is. That struggle has meaning to me since I was bullied but refused to change (even though I'm not a boy). And I want to shell my favorite TV characters, and I already have a bond with them because I feel like I'm in a relationship with their relationship!