Confessions of Doll love: First time <3

That's how I am with one of my newest boys, sure every time I get a doll I like to lavish them in attention because they're new and exciting. But Avery I put alot of thought into, and I absolutely cannot set him down. He's one of my more realistic looking dolls [compared to my Delf boys], and I just adore him. I take soo many pictures of him, and I carry him around everywhere. xD

 

Yeah, I'm definitely that way with Zarek, my BBB Ming. The thing is, the longer I have him, the more I love to have him around. He's almost like a security blanket; just keeping him around makes me feel safer and slightly happier. Though, I only realized exactly how much I care for this doll recently.
A while ago I was having one of those days. You know, those days when all you want to do is sit and cry in a corner. Everything seem to just make the day worse and worse. I felt like my friends were ignoring me, like I really couldn't do anything, and to put the cherry on top, I had gotten into a fight with my mom over how I'd put brush cleaner on the good table. And while I fought her to stop putting all my things away I flung my hands down on the table spilled said brush cleaner all over myself. While she continued to yell at me, all I could do was stand in a silence, letting the flood of anger and sadness that seemed to rush over was like someone had just dumped a bucket of cold water onto my head, come. In the same way that I couldn't stop the water or help how I drenched everything around me, I couldn't help but give my negative, poorly thought out rage to everyone around and blame them for why I felt so bad. Not knowing how to face these powerful emotions, I ran to the only place where I could be alone, to the laundry room, where I just wanted to cry and let myself be sad.
My mom had different plans. She couldn't stand the sight of her daughter crying, much less over something she thought she had done, so she did as any rational person would do and came to comfort me and ask if we were still going to the movie that night. The movie that we had planned to see several days ago, and probably wouldn't be able to see again together for another week.
No could have been the right answer, or the one that suited my wants best, but it wasn't the answer I was allowed to give. Like in a video game, the story can only go on if you agree, and while the option for no is given, you're not expected to take it. In that same way my parents refused to go and leave me alone to cry. The idea of how to get me to come though, finally hit when my will to resist had crumbled and I had come upstairs to get my doll, Zarek. My dad, being the critical thinker as he is, offered the idea of perhaps bringing Zarek with us to go to the movie. The immediate answer from me was an absolute no. I liked just sitting there teary eyed, holding my doll like he was going to be taken from me if I let go, leaving seemed like I was giving in, and I didn't want to give in. The more I thought about it, though, the more I liked the idea. It wasn't that I didn't want to see the movie, but I felt too vulnerable. Zarek, being the security blanket that he is, somehow made me feel less so. Just holding me brought a rush of happiness. So, reluctantly I agreed to take Zarek to the movies. And we did bring him in, just stuffed inside my oversized black purse. And, once inside, he sat happily on my lap, watching brave, and somehow comforting me in a truly unexplainable way.