Discovering the Price...

Folks, there is not much you can do about parents, but I wouldn't call anyone that was that judgemental about my hobby a "friend." They may not share in your hobby or even understand it, but calling you out about it is just wrong and you need to get a better class of friends.

 

I get that reaction a lot... But... I'm sure everyone here does.

Like today, for instance, my mother calls me to ask, "What do you want for Christmas?"

The only thing I want for Christmas (asides from a Volks FCS doll) is a new AOD body for my floating Lusis head. I mean, they're $130, that's pretty reasonable considering she just spent $1,500 on a new Mac. I told her that's what I wanted, and she got all huffy and was like "I don't want to waste my money on a stupid doll body!"

All I could really say was, "Well, that is what I want. Don't ask me what I want if you're going to sit there and trash-talk it."

 

I think the problem with non collectors is that they simply do not equate the cost of a doll or the hobby the same as their penchant for Starbucks coffee, cigarettes, designer handbags, designer shoes, or iPods, music downloads, and the like. If you equate the everyday costs of some people nowadays, (not to mention their total monthly maintenance bills- such as rent, food, utilities, car payment, car insurance, etc.) You wonder how they have the nerve to complain about a friend spending their money on a doll! I'm speaking from my own age group - late thirties to forties- and many people think nothing of spending $3-4 dollars on a cup of coffee!Every day they go to work! add that up and you have about $60-70 a month on coffee. Like someone pointed out here- we don't spend money frivolously but do without the everyday items/expenditures in order to have something that will give lasting enjoyment. Many of the people that I know that do not collect would not think of doing without their Starbucks coffee....but would find it amazing if someone pointed out how much they spend per week on a cup of coffee that could add up to something worthwhile they could enjoy, plus learn to have discipline as far as their spending habits go.

I think in order to collect dolls- especially with this quality and price range, it shows a regard of thinking before you buy, and requires a discipline that sadly, many people do not have, and may be jealous of. I'm very impressed by the stories here that collectors here tell of their saving habits and thriftiness to attain their dream doll, it is inspiring.

 

There's also another element, I think. I was combing YouTube yesterday for reborn baby videos (personally, I find them creepy as hell, but if that's what gets someone else off, hey, it's their thing) and I noticed a lot of comments from users saying how "childish" it was to collect dolls. Not just reborns, but dolls in general.

So, I'm guessing vintage car collecting, hang-gliding, oil painting and other equivalently expensive hobbies are considered more "legit" because they're percieved as being more "adult"? Even though, for the most part, it requires an adult income to fund a doll hobby?

 

I can speak for both sides of this story...

Before I'd ever heard of BJDs, a friend of mine showed me the Luts website and the doll she was contemplating buying. I saw the price and tried to convince her it was a bad idea. My friend had collected other dolls before, but nothing in the same price range. I just couldn't see how a doll would be worth almost $600.

I don't think that advising my friend against the purchase makes me a bad friend. There's a difference between "I don't think that is such a good idea" and "OMG how could you do that!?". Just because someone doesn't completely understand your point of view, that doesn't automatically make them a horrible friend or person. In my mind, I was trying to advise her against making what I thought was a poor financial decision. I thought the doll would spend most of its time on a shelf like her other collectibles, and didn't see how that would be worth so much money.

Luckily, that friend didn't listen to me. She bought a Dark Elf Soo, and when I saw the doll, I began to understand. It was both a toy and an art project, and spent very little time sitting on a shelf. Eventually, I was bitten by the bug and got my own doll a year or two later.

When my brother criticized my new purchase (a hybrid that cost around $300), I just pointed to his brand new PS3 and said, "well, it only cost about half as much as that." It kind of put things in perspective. All the time he spends playing video games is about equal to the time I spend customizing and photographing my dolls.

 

Same here. >< Our dollar dropped 12 points to the US dollar recently, and I was planning on SOOM's December doll if I like it. But right now, if it's a $850 doll, it'll cost me $1020. ><; It's getting painful. I'm getting horrible sticker shock right now, and I haven't seen the doll yet. I'm kind of hoping I don't like it that much now.

The exchange rate wasn't nearly as horrible with my current three...

 

Hmmm ... the few friends who know about my hobby know how much they are. I don't think they care (my one friend thinks the cost is worth it). If one of my friends who doesn't yet know about my hobby should discover how much they cost, he might think I'm crazy. Then again, if he tried chewing me out about it, I'd just roll my eyes at him and point to his study full of Star Trek memorabilia; collector plates, comics, books (that he probably hasn't read 'cause he hates to read), action figures, autographed pictures, Christmas tree ornaments, and every freakin' episode ever made (on VHS and DVD), which he probably has spent at least as much money on as I have my dolls. We all have our hobbies.

Of course, all I'd have to do is show him a couple of those Star Trek BJDs I've seen floating around the board, and he'd probably instantly change his mind and be all for it!

Have I mentioned he's severely ADHD?

As for my parents. Well, I'm 32 so they can't do much about it, but I don't want to deal with those usual disapproving "Mom looks", so she doesn't know the exact cost and I don't intend to reveal it any time soon. heh heh

Also, yes, the whole Starbucks Coffee and other frivolous expenses. I know several people who think nothing of dropping $5, $10, $15 a week on lottery tickets. Personally, I can't imagine a bigger waste of money than dropping $5 on a little piece of paper with a bunch of numbers on it, on the one-in-a-million chance of winning something back again. I've been given those scratch-off lotto tickets before; I get two or three every year for Christmas from co workers and the likes. Never won a single thing off any of 'em. Even a free ticket. So should anyone who plays the lotto or gambles their money ever lecture me about dropping money on a doll, my response would probably be "at least if I ever sell it I'd get my money back. Can you say that about your little pieces of numbered paper?"

 

Oh, if*any of my friends ever asks about the price, I'll be very happy. Finally they paid attention to my hobby! *X) Usually their reaction iis like "Arr, stop that! I'm not interested in your dolls, I can't understand what did you find in them. Stop it!" And the only one who could say something considering the price, had spend last year on computer gadget four times the doll price 0_0 So he stays calm )


But is anyone asks, I have an answer: "You see... If I hadn't bought the doll, I could get new graphic tablet muuuch earlier".

 

Even my mum, who's into dolls is disgusted at the sugestion of spending so much money on them, yet she would not BLINK to spend that money on a PETTICOAT. It's riddiculous. And she was even more annoyed when she found out the doll I just ordered doesn't come with a wig, eyes or clothes. Kinda missing the point there...

 

Same here. My mom had her closet filled with 95% of her clothes (the 5% being my dad's, lol) that had over spilled into my closet and all together probably worth.... over $5000?
I guess it's because hobbies such as clothes shopping are considered something more REASONABLE than an artistic hobby such as this. Well, whatever floats your boat I say.

 

My friends expect and humor my eccentric actions, and usually aren't super blown away when I do something outstandingly apart from their train of thought. After explaining to them exactly WHY the dolls are so expensive, and telling them that I think it's worth it and showing them how passionate I am about the dolls, and how awesome they really are, they will not pick on me.

....and also, I bite, like literally, when someone I know is mean or snotty to me. I mean, seriously LUNGE and SNAP at them. And y'know, people don't like that, so they try to keep me from doing that. lol

 

Waaahhh that's one of the most awesome responses I've ever heard!!! Kudos to you, Dustbunnie!!!!

 

if anyone ever moans about the amount you spend on your doll,just tell them.............one doll is the same price as say playstation3,or a new hi-fi,or a new tv,or an xbox360,or new furniture,a small holiday,the new ipod,the latest mobile phone,a cheap laptop,a sofa,jewellery,expensive designer clothes,
yeah i could go on and on,point is other people spend the same amount of money on other things they would like to buy for themselves that also arent really needed,so whats the difference???

 

Almost all my friends are doll people so they well understand how expensive collecting can be. The few that aren't are polite enough to not ask about price. It's none of their business & they know that. There are certain things that simply don't need to be discussed & the price of personal objects is one of them.

 

My youngest sister knows, and is aghast at the prices but loves the dolls. My middle sister, the one I figured would be irritated with me spending that much, knows enough to have found out the prices, but I don't know if she has. She seems to understand they're expensive and precious, but hasn't said anything bad about them relating to the price. My mom does not know, and my dad just knows "expensive".

When people ask how much they cost, I just answer "I won't say." Repeatedly. Sometimes they start guessing prices, but I just keep repeating "I won't say." If they ask if they're expensive, though, I always say yes.

It's not anyone's business how much they cost, and if they really want to know they can ask me enough about them to figure it out on their own. The only people I'll tell prices to is my youngest sister, since she's interested in them, and my best friend's husband, since he has a $1200 Millenium Falcon sitting in their living room surrounded by a ton of lightsaber replicas, and thus has no room to criticize.

 

I don't even have a doll yet and already my friends are going "WHAT?" Well, mostly my guy friends. One of them was saying paying that much for a toy was ridiculous and that there were so many other things $600 could go towards. So I poked him in the stomach and said playfully,
"Yu-Gi-Oh cards?" He shut up after that. So far, he's spend as much money on cards, getting the rare ones and new decks, as I will on a doll.

 

I'm blunt, very very blunt, so my response would have been "None of you BEEPING business, now GO tend to your own concerns"

Yeah, probably would have lost a friend, but my definition of a friend is NOT someone who looks up info that is none of her business and then berates me over it.

 

I'm in the situation of not spending frivolously, getting the best deals on everything, and still not having money for extras. Every time we balance the budget to have some left to save, some bill goes up! I make side money freelancing, but I feel entirely too guilty spending it on myself right now. Every time I do, I think, "this could pay X bill - or pay to get Y fixed (because everything in this old house breaks)" - but I talked to my husband and he understands and agreed someday I can get one, probably when we can both find better jobs. It's hard to get hours sometimes.

I don't think I could find many people, locally, who'd understand the doll hobby, though - People in this city, as a rule, prefer to spend their money on alcohol and coffee and other things that are only temporary. People who spend that much on coffee - a $5 coffee maker, some filters, and coffee in bulk will keep your caffeine habit all year and save you hundreds!

 

I desperately want to purchase a doll, but my friend and my brother think that I'm crazy saving up that much money just to buy a doll. Oh, well, I don't care...I'm getting one anyways...lol.

 

I'm trying to scrounge up money for my first BJD... but doing so means I can't spend my money on things like video games or anime- much more sensible hobbies according to a friend. I collect lots of anime figures and finally broke down and started in on dolls too, and she was very adamant about not hearing any of it, and telling me so stop being silly.

"Why? How can it bother you so much?"
"Because there is no point."

she said it so matter of factly that I can't get it out of my head... I know that dwelling is pathetic but to know that someone close to you can just refuse to understand what brings you joy in life... Aside from another friend that reassured me that my hobby was no less pointless than hers, it's also comforting (but troubling) to hear so many accounts from other collectors.

I think one problem is that there is a all too common view on how to live a happy, healthy life: basically, the amount of how social you are is in direct proportion to happiness. Its not like i'm anti-social, in fact I feel I get enough contact with other people- but since it is far less than what other people need, it's seen as unhealthy. Really... there's just as much enjoyment out of looking at/fiddling with a doll as seeing the new movie that's out.

I wish people would just let others be happy in their own way...