do people still “bond” with their dolls?

Hum…I think bound is the word for me. I definitely feel something but I would name it something more like “adoration”. More like a feeling of happiness by having them and that spark of joy of “omg you are so pretty” every time I open their boxes.

 

I don’t prefer the word bond, really, but certainly I prefer some of my dolls over others. Some I will have forever as their sculpt and aesthetic appeal to me so much and just make me happy.

 

I have bonds with my two dolls. I love them as the characters they are, and characters rule my life, lol. Less so than they used to since getting a full time job and having far less free time, but I still love being creative when I can. And the characters are the ones that tell me their stories after all.

 

I have no problem whatsoever bonding with my dolls, but then I’ve always been that way with inanimate objects since I was a small child. I’ve always had a vivid imagination and been very creatively driven, so coming up with characters for them is just second nature to me. The characters come to “life” in my mind, so when I find a doll that matches my vision, bonding with them is a no brainer. If for some reason I don’t feel a bond, it just means that doll is not right for the character and I’ll sell them on. Fortunately that has happened very, very seldom over the years…and I once had a doll that actually “jumped character” on me. Turns out he staunchly refused to be the character intended and became someone else entirely. But I adored the sculpt so much, I fortunately had no problem bonding with him as his new character. But that only happened once, and anyone else who didn’t fit their character, no matter how beautiful they were, were subsequently moved on in an effort to refine my collection. Obviously, as far as bonding goes, it’s all about the characters for me, and the match between character and doll needs to be just right.

 

When I buy dolls, usually I have a character in mind for that doll already and if I don't, I build up their characters as I go. But I love them all regardless and see them more as friends and companions. Most of my friends are all online and my irl friends are far away or not in my life anymore for one reason or another. So to have something like my dolls with me brings me comfort and the bond I have for them tends to be strong.

 

I got into the hobby to shell characters but through this journey, I've discovered that bonding is just as important to me as getting the character just right. Taking pictures of them chilling and living their best lives is soothing. I also love seeing strong aspects of their characters that I would have never considered if they'd not been dolls.

One of my favourite things in this hobby has been having a doll that I've 'not bonded with' only for him to become a whole new character which has forced me to get creative. I also really love putting on a shirt or something and suddenly, that character is there, right in front of you. Bonding is super awesome.

 

For me, bonding is more or less whether I enjoy the doll in person. It is an easy word to use to describe whether or not I fully like and enjoy the doll. Photos are great, but once the doll is in my hand it doesn't always feel the same as when I was looking at photos. Sometimes I like them more, sometimes less and other times it takes time for me to find the right look for me to want to keep them. If I try and nothing works then I let them go.
There have been dolls I have loved for a time, but then my tastes/focus/money situation changes and it is time to move on. I guess for me it is just a descriptive word for how much I am liking a doll at any given time.

 

I agree with previous comments that there are different manifestations of enjoying a doll, like "bonding" or versions of "sparking joy." It's cool to read all the descriptions of the different ways people find happiness, from a more "art piece" perspective to building characters to ways of expressing a kind of affection.

I've been finding a feeling of fondness for my dolls; I want to "spoil" them with clothes and other items, and sit them next to me while I work or do other stuff. Maybe I would have similar inclinations if I had a pet, haha

 

I'm trying to do so for the first time. To be fair, this is the first doll that has actually made me want to so...

 

I assume most would? A large investment, both in time and money, combined with relatively endless customization possibilities makes it pretty easy to form some sort of emotional attachment along the way. How that plays out varies from person to person, of course.

 

Yeah I agree, it will take time to bond. I didnt manage to bond with all my dolls, but some I did bond with.
Though some you bond right out of the box.

 

I call it bonding if I find the right look for the doll. There's currently an Iplehouse doll I have I can't bond with because I haven't found the right look for him. All the eyes, wigs don't look right and as much as I love the face I found out I don't like the bulky bodies so I'm not really bonding with him. I just want to sell him
so bonding for me is being happy with the way the doll looks: face, body, face up, eyes, wig, clothes. Everything have to click, I have to feel happy and not frustrated like I'm currently feeling with this doll.

 

It's funny thinking of bonding with dolls, especially going between dolls and writing. Both have characters for me, and both involve some semblance of a story. And in both, I become attached to the characters and setup and everything, but in different ways. In part because the "genre," so to speak, demands different things. And in part, I think, because of the mental/physical divide.

Like, I don't do doll roleplay or write their story. The dolls just have characters attached. And those characters are fun, but they stay put in a way my written characters don't. They exist in this sort of nebulous time that's like, the "essence" of their character. Which the written characters have as well, but they go through arcs, change, evolve, etc. The dolls don't. Yet, anyways.

So there's characters to bond over, but also the physical doll. Dressing them up, holding them, making them things, thinking about making them things... They're real and present. They're something I can go home to, pull out from their boxes, and play with. I straighten their wigs, feel their weight in my hands, and become attached to the physical object. They're a recipient of my "gifts," they're something comforting to touch and hold. Kind of like a favorite stuffed animal.

The attachment becomes twofold - crafting their characters, getting a feel for their personalities and styles and "listening to" the scenes and banter between them like I do for writing, and physically taking care of them with eyes, wigs, clothes, etc. I learn new skills for them, explore new stories, do more research to understand their backgrounds. I become excited to see them and play with them again.

But yeah. I feel it's a very personal thing. Everyone will approach the hobby their own way, wanting to fulfill their own goals. Maybe it's to embody a character, or to tend to lost and broken things, or to enjoy beautiful art. Each is equally valid; I think what matters is you know that, in whatever your way is, you are happy with a doll.

 

With some dolls I bond right away and with some I don't bond at all. Usually when I don't bond with a doll they'll just sit on my shelf forgotten and I don't really do much with them. The ones I bond with usually sits with me right next to my computer and I like to change their clothes alot and so on.

I don't really shell characters so when I get a doll they'll develop personality after and usually then I fall in love with them!
So bonding with a doll means taking care of the doll and enjoying it's aesthetic really.

 

I feel more of a "bond" with my doll that I took the effort to do a faceup for and assemble than I do for my other dolls. This is because I see my other dolls as already formed characters with their own quirks (I adopt secondhand dolls), while my newest boy was "given life" by my own hands. Perhaps that's just my maternal instinct being weird? He's not my child, he's just an object, but my brain very much regards him differently than my other dolls. The human brain is odd lmao

 

Not sure if bonding is the right word but there is certainly a connection. I like holding dolls in my hands, looking at their faces and tiny features. Miniature representations of the real world always fascinate me. I even have my favourite way to hold a doll - to make it look as if it's not just me holding the doll, but the doll's tiny hands are holding onto mine too. They are almost alive. I guess having very little close friends is at least to some extent compensated for me with my dolls, they cannot give me what a real friend would but at least it helps me not to feel so lonely.

 

For me this is all very, very interesting because what you all describe exists in my profession and if I translate it into English it would be something like "object relationship". In my job, it is used as a therapeutical tool. In this context it is basically everything that happens inside you emotionally and mentally when you start working creatively on an object. (Which of course means if you merely buy a doll full-set and put it in a cabinet to admire, it would not fall into this category).

It describes the way your attitude and feelings toward that object change while you work on it. While it is a one-way relationship in the sense that you are the only one experiencing emotions, the doll/ object still acts as a projection screen that will reflect back onto you whatever goes on inside you, including the subconscious. And the nature of your relationship to that doll/ object, the mix of your thoughts and feelings and how they develop, can be explored and used as a tool to progress and heal.
That is also the case, btw, if you don't think of yourself as the bonding type, because your own version of an object relationship always exists as long as you are sentient and conscious while handling it.
I imagine with dolls being the object in question (as opposed to clay pots or soapstone ashtrays^^) it is even more intense, because they invite us to see them as mini persons.

Sorry if that was boring to read, but it is just so fascinating to me.

 

This is so interesting!! It really well articulates how different people respond to the material items we own... Where we are the ones responding to inanimate objects, but by kind of projecting onto them.

 

Of course! Especially if you do your own faceups/customizations. But sometimes I get a doll I don't connect with like I was sure i would.

 

I have not heard of this tendency waning at all. Every doll collector I've spoken to in forums, says they bond with their dolls. Sometimes not all of their dolls, but especially their favorites.
I have a group of 8 dolls (out of a total of 30) which I have a very close bond with. I could not part with any of those dolls. I suffer from depression and anxiety disorder, plus being disabled, and my dolls are important in my ability to cope.