Do you believe that some owners mistreat their dolls?

one thank you very much for your compliments though i'd like to add some commentary if that's alright.

one that is the first time i have ever heard/read anyone say i'm mature so i must for a moment lawl and hard. and two no you don't cause to reach the level i'm at, cause it puts under the colum of crazy to most people (and i agree i'm crazy but that's ok .)

and selfish is sometimes good. lol my new boy sadly due to carelessness of adults grown up adults broke off my new boy that i am protective over's ear spikes on one side. kids, small children handled him far nicer. the freaking 6 year old was more careful, all i have to say is be careful he breaks easy, than my freinds who knew how much he meant to me and his price tag.

and just so everyone knows, yes i am carefull with other peoples dolls. extremely careful. my doll is not the same as someone elses. but yes i agree be gental and extra careful with someone elses doll.

a few things i'd like to state to yours as well. kids no matter how old they are, understand and preseeve things far more clearly than we give them credit for. which is why when i tought a childrens doll and toy panel at con, i brought lot's of very rare and expensive antique delicate dolls from all over asia cause i knew most of those kids would probably never be able to see let alone touch some if not most of them. they would know the difference just from looking the difference between them and a barbie or bratz. textilly a vinyl barbie feels different than a cloth and carved wood doll. they understand that.

now if i'm stupidly rich for working anywhere from 8-14 hour days 5-7 days a week while going to school, and doing chores and other such obilagations. i'd be happy to say i'm proud of that. i only buy my manga and dvds used. same with cds. heck i still love my vhses. and now the first person to tell me i don't work hard for what i want and enjoy, has no idea what i do for my dolls. i may live at home, but i still pay all my bills on time and don't spend money on dolls that i don't have. i don't even own a credit card. not to mention i buy my friends dolls for gifts, and i'm even helping my freind pay for her wedding, cause her husband is having promblems with jobs lately. so being called a spoiled rich girl who doesn't know the value of a dollar or hard work doesn't effect me to much cause i know other wise.

 

I don't disagree with this. I just want to add that I think the monetary value adds in more than you think. For example, my young nephew can drag my $500 doll through the mud, or his $10 Playskool toy through the mud. He can smash his tower of blocks to bits, or an expensive vase to bits. Either way brings the same amount of joy. The only difference is the price, and therefore the heartache to the owner. And remember: not all children are taught the concept of value, and not all of us can afford to repair our dolls over and over again.

 

This is another bad example. I'll take my expensive hunk of resin over dealing with a child. (Though if my brother has kids, I'm definitely going to be the awesome crazy aunt and let them handle my easier to replace/repair dolls, under the correct supervison of course.)

But you have to realize that a lot of people don't really care too much for children. I honestly wouldn't trust my step-sister with any of my dolls, because I know she would mistreat them - she doesn't even take care of her own stuff! I've tried to explain value and worth to her, and she continues to ignore it.

I'm a very selfish person, I like my stuff taken CARE of, and if it comes down to my stuff being mistreated or a kid getting a few seconds of glee, I'll take my expensive, hard-earned stuff. My dolls are things I use to help me with my anxiety, and I wouldn't dare let them fall into the hands of irresponsible tikes.

 

I think perhaps there is some confusion between being 'selfish' and being 'careful.' Not wanting one's things destroyed, whether it's a dollar notebook or a $500 doll, is not a symptom of being selfish. It's just a characteristic of someone who is careful with their possessions. I have a good deal of respect for people who are careful with things, children and adults. My mother was very careful early on to teach her children to respect their books; we did not smear our popsicle-covered hands on the pages, but learned to wash our hands, then touch the books.

However, we were not expected to wash our hands to play with the shovels and toy trucks outside.

My mother was not selfish; she was teaching good manners. Also, the fact that there is a time and place for being dirty and rowdy, and a time for being clean and calm. Respect for one's own possessions will definitely influence respect for other's things. Children are happy with both. I would not hand my doll off to a three-year-old, because it's just not the time. Would I sit with her, holding the doll, and let her look, hands behind her back? Yup! That's appropriate, for me and my mindset. I wouldn't presume to tell someone else what to do with their possessions, of course...but I certainly wouldn't hand my doll to someone who doesn't seem to respect their own doll, regardless of their protestations that they have the utmost respect for mine.

 

Well everyone has the right to do what they want to a doll, they spent the money on it, if they want to take a beautiful doll, spend hundreds on it and then ruin it, its their waste of money. It's not something i would do, i dont haqve my own doll yet, but i treat everyone elses with kid gloves out of respect that its not my doll, ad i doubt the owner wants me to ruin their doll for them.
Its a case of not being careless and being considerate about other peoples belongings.

 

some kids are raised that way others like me were taught treat your stuff however you want, you treat others stuff the way they want. and if you break it, your parents aren't buying you a new one, wait for your b-day/x-mas , replace it yourself with allowance, or fix it.

i have respect for my things and other poeples things, doesn't mean i don't like or can't be ruff with mine. being ruff isn't disrespectful. i had a freind throw my favorite necklace against our tv and not only nearly shatter my necklace she broke the tv. it was a large solid ceramic pendant necklace. her parents had to buy my parents a new tv. however my parents, nor hers would get me new necklace. though i had saved up my months allowance to get the speical movie that came with it. my parents told me it was my fault for being her freind so i had to take responsiblty for letting her over and therefore allowing her to break it. so i spent two weeks searching for the peices and gluing it back together. i was 10/11 at the time. because it meant that much to me. the same applied to alot of my things, if i broke them, or someone else did, didn't matter. i had to fix them or save up to.

i learned to be responisble not only for my own things, but also my decisions. i make the choice to allow a small child to play with my expensive doll, and therefore i take responibilty for my choice if they break it. and that's why i learned to fix my dolls. i still respect my dolls, i just choose to be a little risky with them, which i can cause i took the time to learn how to fix things if something goes wrong.

 

I do appreciate that a person know the value of their own possession and treat it according to how they feel it's worth. I was taught that to show that you value something, you treat it with care. I'm sure how a person treats their possession with care varies from owner to owner though.

One thing that does puzzle me a bit is the idea that as long as it puts a smile on the kids' face, damage to one's possession is fine. I can't agree with this because I feel that perpetuates a destructive behaviour. You might allow kids to treat your dolls roughly while still being able to treat other people's dolls with care, but the kids who are allowed free reign are being taught - even if it's just once - that they can treat the possessions of others how ever they want.

I'm not saying kids shouldn't be allowed to touch or hold or play with dolls. Go for it if that's your thing. I'm saying they probably shouldn't be given the idea that dragging prized possessions through dirt is a fine thing to do. This is where the behaviour of throwing someone else's necklace against a TV and breaking a friend's doll might start from.

 

Reiterating what everyone else has said your doll, your money, your responsibilty. So many people do things to there dolls that annoy me. I get over it as best I can.

Honestly though a lot of the kids I know these days are completely feral, I wouldn't let them near anything I owned. I'm careful with my doll. I worked hard to get her, when my friend got a spot of marker on her nose I could have kicked her off a bridge quite happily and she doesn't get to play with Ki anymore. I should have been more careful with what she was doing but I expected better because she keeps her manga near mint.

I think in the end it comes down to trust. If you trust that you'll be able to fix it, then go for it. If you trust the person not to break it, these are your risks, not anyone elses.

 

Somehow i really get annoyed when people get dollfies just because all their friends have one.
thats how it was with my friend.
she did;nt know how to look aafter a dollfie.
i wanted to help her . but she claimed to know how to look after one and that she did'nt care.
She only wanted one cause me and my friends have them.
After that ,i did'nt see her for awhile.
a few weeks later , i asked her to follow me out.
and i asked her to bring her dollfie.
it looks "horrible"
it had quite a few scratches and also was very dirty.
i felt so sad for it.
in the end.
i just shaked my head and did'nt go out in the end.
really puzzled.

 

This one girl who got me into these dolls used to be rough when handling Hikaru. Like, she used to grab him by his arms or legs to pick him up and almost every time she saw him she used to ruffle up his fur wig BAD (so what? It's just a $10 wig--she said). She treated her own doll the same way--and that's fine to me, but not when it comes to my own stuff.

I told her that she better stop, and she flat out said she wouldn't and that I was making a big deal out of nothing. She said she had every right to treat my things the same way she treated her stuff.

Yeah, the ultimate no-no response. I'm very protective of my stuff, for one thing, and if a friend flat out refuses to respect that--then no, forget you.

 

Well, I think that if you spent alot of money on something, you should treat it exactly like that.
I saw a video on youtube that just irked me. Two girls had two limiteds and were just wacking them against eachother.
If you're going to treat them like that, give someone else a chance of being a better owner.
Not just limiteds though, but every doll. You don't wack something around that you put your heart into (which most people do) and have spent alot of time and money on.

 

It's their money to do what they want with I guess. It may irk other owners to see dolls treated that way but hey, if they want to throw away a few hundred dollars that's their prerogative, no one really has the right to tell someone else how they should treat their own property or pretend that one person is 'more deserving' of said dolls than another.

 

dolls are toys. expencive, but toys never the less, they are ment to be played with however the owner likes to play. Weather it is brushig the dust off of it and never touching or skewering and roasting over an open fire, i don't care. But make a pass on my dolls and I will hurt you. ^__~

 

I suppose you're right, but I always felt you had to deserve what you have. If you have a cat and you treat it badly, you don't deserve it.
And fine, a cat may not be the same as a doll, but it pretty much falls in the same category for me.

 

OK-- so who gets to decide "deserve"?

 

To be honest I don't think animals and dolls are even on the same level when it comes to responsibilities.

Abusing a living, breathing creature is entirely different to playing roughly with an inanimate object. I wouldn't consider the two to be comparable in any way, shape or form given that BJDs -while expensive- are still toys.

 

"You pays your money you takes your chances."
I haven't even bothered to read the other posts.
But it's like this: the doll is not a living thing. It is not a child being hit by its parents. It is not a dog getting kicked by cruel children. It is just a thing.
The whole point is you get joy out of it. You pay your money, and you use your doll to it's fullest extent. If that means creating a beautiful, exotic character and preserving it, good! If it means giving it a terrible faceup and unprofessional clothes, and staining it, and dropping it, but literally loving it to pieces, good! If it means creating something simple, but nice, and taking photos or making art, good! So long as you feel that it is being used how you would like it to be, it is not being abused.
The CLOSEST I can think to getting abused is forgetting about it somewhere; but even then, it's just a bit sad or disappointing.
One should not be judged on how they take joy in their things. If someone buys christmas lights and smashes them into little bits and glues them into an abstract sculpture, they have used those lights to the fullest extent.

 

To add to my post:
When you have a kid or a pet, it's more about making sure THEY are getting joy out of it, and hopefully they will treat you that way in return.
If you pay for an object, it has no feelings, it's about YOU getting joy out of it.
And if you are holding someone else's object, it is about you not doing something silly and getting yourself burned to a crispy-crisp.
Thank you, and good night.

 

The dictionary says this of "abuse":

1 use (something) to bad effect or for a bad purpose; misuse : the judge abused his power by imposing the fines.
• make excessive and habitual use of (alcohol or drugs, esp. illegal ones).
2 treat (a person or an animal) with cruelty or violence, esp. regularly or repeatedly : riders who abuse their horses should be prosecuted.
• assault (someone, esp. a woman or child) sexually : he was a depraved man who had abused his two young daughters | [as adj. ] ( abused) abused children.
• use or treat in such a way as to cause damage or harm : he had been abusing his body for years.


So maybe abuse in meaning one can be aimed at dolls. The second meaning surely doesn't apply. I hate it when people grind their gears when driving, however, altho' abuse in the first sense , it's not in the 2nd sense, I think.

Some people are, as has already been said, careless with their belongings, dolls included, or sometimes merely clumsy. If it's their own dolls fine, but mark or damage my dolls and the perpetrator will SUFFER. LOL

Clare

 

I've seen people mistreat their dolls. And, although it kind of makes my eyes bug out a little when I think of how they could damage that expensive item, I don't and won't say anything because that's how they want to treat their property.

However, I've also had occasions where I've felt very uncomfortable in the presence of these people, because I fear they'll treat my doll the same way. When they poke and prod at their own doll's faceup, it irks me but that's up to them. However, I don't want them doing the same to mine. As far as I'm concerned, they can treat their dolls however they want. But unfortunately, this often breeds a certain mindset that it's ok to treat any doll that way. For someone as obsessively careful about their dolls as me, this is a huge problem.

But as long as they use their common sense and know that they shouldn't necessarily treat every doll the way they treat their own, then it's up to them.