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Do you feel that ABJDs matures a person?

Jul 13, 2010

    1. I ask this from my other thread.
      Most of you had said that if a child is responsible enough, you don't mind.
      However somethings it's not always the case.
      I will give a good example.
      When I joined my favorite site., Gaia I was well blow the age limit, and to be honest I acted like a noob.
      But I got used to the site, my spelling got better, and so did my manners.
      Now take that and put it to BJDs.
      As you know, BJDs are most times, expensive, delicate, and addictive.

      So when people who failed to realize that, still get into the hobby, they change for the better or worst.
      Do you think that this happens a lot? Do you feel that his happens with all age groups or just one?
      But most of all, do you understand where I'm coming from?
    2. People, whether young or old, are changed by their experiences -- it's part of being human. Anytime you enter a new hobby or interest, you're learning new things and if it's a social hobby, adjusting to new groups of people.

      When it comes to internet forums, communication is quite different than talking face to face with someone. There is no tone of voice or body language, and sometimes that can take getting used to. I feel like I'm more comfortable on message boards and the like do to the amount of time I have spent at places like DoA. Prior to getting into the doll hobby, I didn't spend that much time on forums, and when I did, I usually just lurked.

      It can also take time in the hobby to figure out what you like, and tastes and interests can also change. This too is normal.
    3. It depends on what you define maturity as and where it comes from. I believe maturity comes from the environment and genetics. Your environment is everything that is outside of your skin and everything you take into experience as memories, whether it be episodic or semantic. Genetics matters as well as no two persons are alike and the encoding can determine whether you grow at a faster rate or not. An example is a prodigy. While one thinks ABJDs matures a person or not, one has to question what is already there to determine one's maturity or not.
    4. Well, my boy is the first major purchase I've ever made, so in a way I guess it's helping me mature, at least in terms of 'Okay, gotta actually plan out a budget, not just buy books, think about money', which I hadn't really done before.

    5. Nope Nope

      Not at all, at least not in my case LOL
    6. Saving up for something can help someone mature -- including the resistance to other temptations and all that goes with it, though this is not unique to BJD collecting. Caring for something valuable can also help someone mature, but again, this is not in any way unique to BJDs. Patience? People need it with the typical wait times -- again, though, not unique to BJDs. Exposure to other cultures, but again... not unique. There are a lot of possible means of expanding one's horizons or growing as a person within the hobby, certainly, but if the person isn't open to that growth, it's not going to happen. That said, any hobby someone becomes involved in is going to be a learning experience, even if all someone learns is, "this really isn't the hobby for me."
    7. I agree, I think it depends on what your definition of maturity is. I've met enough
      people who others would deem "mature" who I feel are the epitome of immaturity!!
      So honestly I think it's all just a matter of opinion!!!!

      Since entering this hobby I've learned how to communicate better online (I think..)
      I've never really been an impatient person but have definitely learned a whole new kind
      of patience while waiting for my dolls. I've learned how to sell dolls/items...so far so good.
      I've definitely had to learn how to choose what I buy more carefully and think pretty far in
      advance (thanks Soom..) It's taken a while and still feels like a work in progress, I guess
      because this hobby really is addicting, but I've had to resist wanting every doll that I really
      like (being kinda poor helps too) so I think I make better choices overall...hmmm that's all
      that I can think of presently.

      So maybe on those things I've "matured". But I'm not sure those things would
      be considered much of anything by most people...even family/people I know. *shrugs*

      I'm curious though, could you explain what you meant by saying "they change for the better
      or worst" ? I'm not sure how a doll hobby could make someone "bad"? Unless you mean
      things like greediness being possessive etc...?

      edit: I agree with surreality on many points.... I think this hobby has the possibility
      to mature someone if they are willing/allow it to...but it's probably not unique to owning
      ABJD's itself. That said the things I've learned likely wouldn't have occurred without it.
      But I don't think that's maturity....just growth from experience and the willingness to do so.
    8. I think this question is funny, because at the end of the day we get to play with dolls. ;)

      Aside from the points Surreality mentioned, temptations, enabling and collective "OMG must have now!" feelings are common in this hobby and resisting those helps you mature too. Again, this is not something unique to BJDs.
    9. lmao! No way. You might mature as a person whilst you engage in the hobby and learn netiquette, but I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that no adult grows more mature through playing with dolls ;)
    10. For some people I think it does; saving up for your own doll teaches you to consider all your purchases and your income, it teaches you to be more responsible about where your money goes. For other people, not so much! Paying for doll items online using paypal is almost like using Monopoly cash, you don't see the money being spent, so it's very easy to keep ordering things without thinking about the cost.

      I personally think you bring yourself into your hobbies, so if you're a conscientious person who is normally careful with money, you'll be the same with your dolls and if you're a careless spendthrift, you'll be just the same! Anyone can change, but I think the traits you naturally have will be stronger than ones you adopt. It's also easier to adopt the attitudes of social groups when you see them in person regularly, local meetups would therefore have more of an impact on a person's attitudes towards BJDs and related issues, compared to just discussing dolls online.
    11. I don't mean any disrespect, but the idea that a doll can mature anyone makes me roffle. :D

      I wouldn't want a doll that would force me to mature. Having fun is our reward for growing up.
    12. I think you matured as you aged, I'm not sure the dolls had anything to do with it. We all mature naturally and for children/teenagers any hobby that causes them to interact with a group of differing ages and nationalities will speed that process along. BJDs didn't mature you but interacting with others in the hobby and having something you are passionate about did ;)
    13. No, not at all.

      I see lots of stunningly immature behavior from BJD owners both online and in person. I see lots of mature behavior too. I don't think the dolls have anything to do with one's maturity or lack thereof.
    14. Agreeing with previous statements that the dolls themselves do not cause a person to mature. Maturity comes with both time and experience, our interactions and experiences. The process of saving for the doll, the act of caring for the doll, the interaction with the doll community online and off, and even interactions with non doll people in regards to ones doll. Those are all possible reasons a person will mature.
      A person can 'regress' as well, I've seen it happen especially when a group of people are involved. It's amazing how subtle the influence of other people can be to us, and yet to anyone watching it is glaringly obvious.
    15. As chibaraki says above, I've seen immature and mature people in this hobby. I don't really think that owning BJDs matures people. It can teach life skills with saving up and patience, but overall maturity with behavior with other people? It depends, really. I think interacting with a group of doll OWNERS does more than actually owning a BJD, making one more mature or even regressing people, as Apricotkiss stated.

      Life skills? Yes, this is possible. But especially to non-doll people, owning ABJDs can seem on the immature end ^_^;;
    16. Even as far as life skills, I think that can go either way too - if your starting point was Spend-Everything/Instant-Gratification, then the hobby might move you forward, but if your starting point involved saving your extra income for your education/retirement/emergency fund and you start spending it on dolls instead then that might be a big step backwards. It's all relative.

      Heh, love this! :D
    17. I've seen some.... 'mature play' with dolls... but I don't think that is what we are discussing here, lmao!! :XD: I think I am well past my formative years where this hobby could have any major influence on my 'maturity', but I'll have to say, it has made me really think twice about what I was spending money on before I got into BJDs (oh yeah... tattoos... lol) and I'm a little more thrifty with my clothing/food/entertainment budgets now I have tiny resin children to support :whee:
    18. *grin* I wonder if spending less on food so you can buy more doll things is exactly maturity? :XD: Fun, yes! Mature? No!

      Massive generalisation here, but I think the notion of "being mature" matters less to people who actually *are* adults/mature, rather than to teens who wanting to be taken more seriously. I mean, right now I feel no particular need to prove I'm mature to anybody; when I was growing up, it was way more important.
    19. Haha rephrase - I buy groceries now (at Sainsburys not Waitrose lol) and eat at home more often instead of spending so much in expensive restaurants :XD: But I think that has as much to do with someone I no longer hang out with and 6 months unemployment than just the dolls ;)

      But yes, being mature is something I do all day at work, and something I am perfectly capable of being when it comes to the more serious parts of this forum, such as marketplace trading. But when I come home it is *SQUUUEEEEE HUG MY DOLLIES* time lol! I think you have both sides here - for younger people I can def see how this hobby might teach them certain responsibilities, as many hobbies can, and for us older crew, it is great for IMmature winding down!! ;)
    20. This is an awesome point. I've always considered one of the primary signs of maturity to be knowing when to let your hair down and just have fun, or let your inner child out to play for a while. Even knowing that it's pretty healthy to have an outlet like this is, to me, a definite sign of maturity -- provided it's kept in perspective with other aspects of life, of course. ;)