Does becoming a "crazy doll lady/person" concern you?

I’m 48. I’ve been collecting dolls since my childhood, BJDs are just my newest obsession. I’ve been collecting those since 2006. I did get rid of most of the porcelains I’d collected in my teen years and I don’t even know what happened to my vast collection of Barbies. I don’t consider BJDs “playline” in the same way, though. They’re expensive works of art. Like porcelain dolls except these you can handle and customize and play with.

I also have an interest in photography and they make fabulous models for practicing. So there’s that excuse.

But also! I collect Monster High, Ever After High, and Rainbow High dolls. Only the ones I really like, though. I’m not one of those “gotta catch ‘em all!” collectors. I think they are cool, pretty little dolls that are articulated out the wazoo. They are way cooler than the Barbies I grew up playing with. If they’d existed in the 80s, I’d have had them then. I’m just playing catch-up.

I admit I don’t talk to a lot of people about my hobby, but I’m introverted by nature. I don’t talk to people about a lot of things unless I know them or I know they share my interests. I’m really bad at making small talk with complete strangers.

I admire the people who can take their BJDs with them when they go out in public. I’d love to do that too, but again, my personality doesn’t let me. I don’t want the extra attention good or bad. I will, however, happily take as many BJDs as I can carry to a convention or meetup when I know there will be other collectors there who also have as many BJDs as they can carry. They’re my tribe! And besides, safety in numbers and all that. Maybe there will be attention, but it will be dispersed among us and not focused solely on me, which is much easier to handle.

Anyway! Don’t let your age deter you from collecting something you love. Other people’s opinions are only that, and in the end they don’t matter at all. If you spend your entire life worrying about what other people may or may not think of you, you’ll miss out on a lot of enjoyment.

 

I've always been a collector and, outside of a brief stint in my preteen years where I was "too mature" for dolls (i.e. too personally insecure to be caught liking what I like), I've maintained a healthy collection of dolls. I started on Barbies and Bratz as a kid, which evolved into Pullips and Monster High in my early teens, saved enough for my first BJD by my mid-teens, and have grown my BJD collection and started a healthy Blythe collection since young adulthood. Most everyone who is any closer than a passing acquaintance knows I collect dolls, so it's not something I'm ashamed of or particularly private about.

I doubt I'll ever be looked at as a "crazy" doll lady, though. I have two degrees and am well on my way to a third, I'm married, I have two kids, and I have a mortgage. By most cultural hallmarks, I'm a very well-adjusted human being, which makes people more willing to overlook, ignore, or embrace my eccentricities. The dolls become a fun quirk of my personality rather than reinforcing some preconceived narrative that I'm weird and unlikable.

Even if I was weird and unlikable, though, I don't think suppressing your interests for the sake of appearing "normal" in a socially acceptable way is good for you. It's our differences that make us interesting, not our similarities, and there will always be someone out there willing to befriend/love you. It's worth it to find the people who will accept you, all of you, even the weird parts, than to cut your personality to shreds to make yourself more palatable.

I also don't think dolls are incompatible with an elegant lifestyle. It all comes down to investment and styling. Sure, maybe sock dresses and faux fur wig balls aren't exactly the height of refinement, but no one said you had to style your dolls that way. You can invest (either money or time to learn the skill) in high quality wigs, beautiful clothing, and stellar faceups if making them look sophisticated is important to you. Your dolls can become art pieces that you display that coordinate with your decor. Having a beautiful and luxurious space is less about what you have and much more about how how you choose to display it.

 

I do not care what people thinks about me. I barely talk to people IRL because of past misconceptions and ideas people project on me and I suffered the consequences. This taught me the hard way of not caring for other's opinions.
Becoming a "crazy doll lady" is pretty much my plan LOL The older I get the more I like the dolls. I am a creative person and I work on illustration. My dolls are my to go when I am stress, sad or I just wanna be creative aside from work. I want to keep learning about doll face-ups, custom, and some other off topic dolls art.

Dolls are art and art id part of my life, regardless the shape or discipline.

 

I used to feel self conscious about stuff like this with all of my more "niche" hobbies, collecting figures, crystals, tarot, watching anime, wearing lolita, etc. At some point, I just stopped caring and my life changed for the better. It's the same with BJD, if someone comes to my house and sees the stuff I collect and has a negative reaction to it, then that person isn't going to be invited back lol. Anyone who takes time to judge something that isn't harming anyone or causing problems has too much time on their hands and need to find a hobby themselves.

 

I know that what I have is good and if others can't appreciate it its their loss My hobbies are pretty eccentric to begin with anyway, so it's good!

 

Interesting question and the same answers.
I've long since learned that anyone can be judged for anything, and you can get hate even from people in the hobby.
But no matter what others think, it's fine as long as your hobby doesn't hurt anyone.
People tend to ridicule what they don't understand and put new meanings on it to fit their worldview. But no matter how opinionated and mocking they are, they are not willing to take responsibility for your emotional comfort or leisure time in their spare time. You are delegated to occupy yourself with something and somehow assuage the existential pain of living in this world, so what claims can there be? Dolls? Fine!
Dolls are not only a kind of escapism but also a satisfaction of aesthetic claims, a tool for creativity.
I'm very fond of passionate people. After work, I watch reviews and videos with craft, sewing, and face-up.
What I'm getting at is, take care of your authenticity. You have an exciting hobby and artistic vision. Some will admire your collection.

 

I’ve been into dolls since I was a kid and I never really stopped so… yeah there will be people who don’t understand and look down on you for it. But I am also lucky enough to have a small group of friends who are all into dolls too so I’ll take whatever mean comment or judgement as I know it’s no big deal. Some people just can’t understand what makes people happy ^^

 

Like many others in this thread, I've come to terms with the fact that I'm a creepy doll dude. No amount of sugar coating will change this. I've also accepted that noone, including my loved ones, has to approve of my hobby. I won't hold it against them if they find it weird but still accept me as a person. I feel a large part of growing up is compromising and accepting the fact that everyone is different and working together despite it.

I even value the opinions of ones who don't, as it gives me a chance to step back and make sure my hobby isn't controlling me. I had this happen to me once when I got addicted to a mmo and stopped taking care of myself physically and socially. I try to have a balance now, as all things should be.

 

@Kudoku I think people are a bit obsessed about sex these days. I say this because that's what most of the judgmental attitude comes from. I've got a workshop with a whole wall of nude figure drawings and ecorche (skinless) studies, skulls I keep for reference, the kind of stuff you'd see in an art atelier. I'm in contact with elderly, practicing Catholics and those always saw all of this as figurative drawing. I never felt like I had to hide anything or be embarrassed about it.
Then I took graphic design courses, and the youngest, progressive, artsy people with dyed hair and facial piercings acted wierdly embarrassed and made naughty insinuations like what I did was taboo. It was a really bizarre experience.
I assume the same kind of projection would happen with dolls, so no thanks, I'm definitely keeping this one hobby to myself.

 

I'm not a social person so I prefer to stay at home or with my close friends. Dolls are like another kind of friends to me so I would mind to be a crazy old lady surrender by dolls

 

I love this thread so many good thoughts shared by fellow BJD collectors.For me, it's a not really a concern what other people think. The monikor "crazy doll lady" is often ascribed to many of us from people outside the hobby, because they don't understand. This is more of a reflection on them than the doll collectors. People like to label other's as crazy or eccenric when it is outside the norm. Also, the stigma comes from that TV-Show "Hoarders" that show episodes where a lady filled her entire house with dolls.

It’s a shame people outside the community misunderstand the passion! This hobby is fascinating with so many talented people in it. Doll collecting is incredibly diverse, with so much artistry in every tiny detail. The dedication to craftsmanship, design, and storytelling is amazing, especially when you see customizations and the different eras and cultures represented.

 

I know I ve already responded but things happened and those are menopause which made me think how old I am getting , so my plan is to as I am getting older to sell off my things so that not being a burden to my son in my elder years. So for now I might be a crazy doll lady but let's say less than before and in 5years even less, in 10 years just a bit and if I m happy to live to old age not at all cause I don't plan to hold on them till very old age.

 

Read through this thread and want to put my two cents in! I have a lot of thoughts on this, most of which align basically with everyone else (as a TLDR).

While everyone here says crazy is subjective, that may be the only thing I disagree with. Mostly just because I don't believe in using the word outside of its objective meaning. I have schizophrenia; I am objectively crazy. And that's okay! When other people say 'crazy xyz lady', and actually mean unhealthy behavior, it isn't craziness; it is usually an obsessive behavior in line with addiction. You can be addicted to anything. Dopamine gets you hooked. Shopaholism is a real thing, and many of these hobby addictions I see are usually in line with how that makes you feel. Spend money, get good feels, spend more money, repeat.

For everything else, ie, the actual question of the thread...

No! I don't worry! And for many reasons!

I'm very open about my psychosis, so I'll be seen as crazy regardless. Few people I meet actively regard me as a danger or a freak. And those that think I'm a freak and stay in my life, are usually freaks in their own ways! It's all love there.

Not only that, but as others mentioned, it just contributes to the strict rules of society set for men and women. Women are shunned quite often for having ANY interest that isn't child-rearing and housemaking. And even then, that doesn't seem to be enough anymore! You need to be a career-woman, a mom, and a homemaker! With no other interests. You also have to be perfect in how you speak, what you think, and how you dress! I touch a book, but it's romance? I'm one of those weirdos with unrealistic expectations. Touch a cozy video game? Fake gamer, trying to get into boys' interests. Touch an otome game? Ugh, unhealthy at my "big age" (I am 23). Anime? Weeaboo trash. I had one cat and was deemed a future crazy cat lady. I have off-topic dolls and people think I'm not growing up. It is what it is.

My mom taught me not to care about peoples' opinions unless they're "feeding you, romancing you, or paying you". And even then, I find I don't care... At most, I get a little irritated.

Of course, guys deal with their own stereotypes and expected behavior/interests. I know guys into BJDs must also get quite a bit of flack, especially.

I have also experienced what I imagine these judgmental people go through, and misdirect their aggravation onto others for. For such a long time, I ached for things that would give me the hit of dopamine I saw people with hobbies go through. I tried many things, imitated others, and nothing stuck. When compared to now, with how many things I genuinely enjoy? I'd never trade it for the world. I really recommend just enjoying yourself.

If you find yourself developing an addiction, you should think about it seriously. If you can identify it, as I see others have in this hobby, follow in their footsteps and figure out how to cut back and control it. If you feel you may not be able to do that on your own, and you have access to resources, I recommend that too! There's no reason you should suffer alone, or think that the issue is the hobby, or that you are broken and dolls in general are unhealthy for you. Everything is good in moderation, and moderation is a touch more objective than craziness, haha. People can handle different amounts of everything; some people can only handle a handful of dolls.. some are able to handle a plentiful amount.

 

I live in a fortress of dolls, dollhouse miniatures, yarn, cross stitch projects and plants. I also currently have four cats (the smallest number I've had in years).
So even though I'm a Crazy Lady, I don't really know what kind of Crazy I identify as.

 

I wouldn't connotate a "crazy doll lady" in a negative light. There is absolutely nothing wrong in collecting BJDs - I just think of it the same way as how one has the hobby of collecting tons of pairs of shoes, bags, of even cats!

I do get how why it may be perceived as something to be conflicted about though. I am also in my 30s and it is a bit of a challenge for people outside the community to understand (e.g., people will say "oh you can save that money towards the future instead" "you can just buy something more practical with that money") - but then again, if the hobby gives you a sense of comfort and if collecting makes you feel better at the end of the day or makes you a better person, then that is money well spent and definitely a hobby worth being proud of!

 

I think anybody who loves dolls will go a bit crazy/ excited to hear people talk about dolls. I just don't worry about the label "crazy" cause we all have a bit of crazy in us.

 

I'm a bit worried about collecting too many, I'm really trying to cap myself at 8-10 full dolls, max...

But most people around me don't know about my collection unless they've gone up to my room. I am worried about moving with all my dolls though, I think this will be quite a process, which is also why I want to cap my dolls before they hit double digits.

 

I'm 20 and honestly i love being a crazy doll person, its very comforting to accept I'm a bit weird and that might put people off, its like a suit of armor i wear. and yes sometimes i do feel a but self conscious on my own with my dolls in public, but i know how cool my dolls are and i have a local comm i can share the joy of dolls with