Does becoming a "crazy doll lady/person" concern you?

I can never understand the mindset that dolls are substitute children. I've never had it said to me, thankfully. I've just read anecdotes. Still, I have to wonder whether people who say this are just not very involved with their own children. I mean, do they think a child is just a plaything to dress in cute clothes and show off to others? Or do they think that dolls require food and emotional support?

When I was your age, I think I might have been a bit more self-conscious, but now I don't care. Plenty of random people know I collect dolls and sew for them. I am an adult. I pay all of my bills. I go to work on time, I get my job done, I stay late, and when I get home, I get to do whatever I want. Sometimes that includes photographing or sewing for my dolls. Sometimes that includes having a few dolls sit next to me while I play a computer game. Sometimes it doesn't involve my dolls at all (and you can't ignore children like that without getting a visit from your friendly neighborhood social worker). I don't have to answer to anyone about what I do on my free time since I am hurting no one and breaking no laws. People who don't understand that likely have some insecurities themselves, since they are so concerned with what hobbies are "normal." They are in no position to judge you

 

I joke to people about being a Crazy Doll Lady already. :P

 

No, I'm not worried about that. I don't talk about my dolls all that much to my friends and family, not because I'm insecure, but because there really is no need. They know about my hobby, but they don't fully understand it and that's okay with me. We have many other interests in common we can chat about, so that's why it never really gets brought up much. I also collect Pokémon merch and other figures and have never been called childish or crazy by my friends or family. Even if I had been, life is too short to base your interests on what other people will think of you.

 

Adults have been collecting dolls for hundreds of years. In the 1700s wealthy people collected dolls dressed in fancy silks and lace. These were not children's toys, but dolls created specifically for the amusement of adults. Many of them were articulated so they could be posed, or had clockwork mechanisms that enabled them to do things like play musical instruments or sit at a desk and draw pictures. They were very popular in the Royal courts of Europe.
Also as early as the 11th century in Japan dolls were displayed in people's homes as part of Hinamatsuri, the doll festival. Not as children's toys.
There are many other examples of adults owning and collecting dolls throughout history. It's definitely NOT something to be ashamed of or embarrassed about.
Here's a history of dolls: Doll - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I do understand your feelings, however. I've collected other kinds of dolls in the past, everything from Barbies to antiques. I don't advertise the fact that I collect dolls. It's not that I'm ashamed of them, but it's because they are a very personal and private part of my life.

 

Nope, I really just do not care what people think of my life. They do not have to live it. Only I do, and therefore, my opinion is ultimately the only one that matters.

I enjoy my dolls. I enjoy collecting action figures and comics and art. I love my cat. If someone is going to try and shame me any of these things, they don't need to be in my life, and honestly, it just makes me think they must be awfully unhappy and unfulfilled with their so called normal lives to feel the need to attack mine.

 

I know how you feel... I'm ten years older than you and a single woman with cat - and lots of dolls. That doesn't at all fit in with what my family - and large chunks of society - think I should be. They make all sorts of assumptions (that I'm lonely, frustrated, a bit batty, wanting a child...) based on what they feel people should want or be, but that doesn't at all match my own experience. I am really happy as a single with cat and dolls and books, and I don't feel my cat, my dolls or my books substitute for anything else I may lack. They are what I want, and I feel balanced and contented. But that doesn't change the fact that I do wish people would stop making their silly assumptions. It would be easy enough for me to ridicule their choices, but I don't, because it's their life.

I'm not sure why it matters what people think of me when I feel good being who I am, but it does. That's tough sometimes. But it beats trying to be what other people think you should be and feeling miserable because of it. I tried it. It didn't work. I prefer being a doll-and-cat lady. It feels right.

Also, I'm not sure who established that seriousness and a total lack of imagination is compulsory to adult life, but whoever it was, I'm quite sure it never made them happy - or creative! No, really. On my best days I wear my mild eccentricity as a badge of honour.

 

I already am a crazy doll lady. I got about 10 dolls in less than 1 year. At the moment I'm just missing a cat, but I was thinking of getting one. I'll see how that goes lol.

 

The area where I live is pretty closed off when it comes to most things. So, whenever a friend of mine sees a picture of my doll online they instantly message me asking what it is and telling me that they think its a bit weird. Even my closer friends ask me in person about my doll and I like informing them about what the dolls are, but my friends still express that its out of their comfort zone. My boyfriend doesn't show much disdain for it, but he doesn't much encourage it or want to hear about it. My family doesn't understand it either, but they never really have understood anything when it comes to me. Lol So, with that being my every day experience with being in this hobby, I'm terrified of being labeled too.

To me, the dolls are not much different than the art or crafts I make. They are just another media for me. Of course, I love making little personalities for them and I easily bond. But I will certainly agree not everyone is going to view it that way and that its just fine. What is more important is that you enjoy what you're doing and everyone else can get over themselves. We all have little quirks and weird interests, so we should just embrace each other :3

 

Myself, I'm not in the slightest bit bothered by what other's think. I'm a single mother by choice - I have cats, dolls and three daughters. I dabble in an insane number of hobbies, most of them terribly old fashioned, and I have a pretty ongoing

But for you - I think you have to determine where you want to be. You've admitted to your insecurities; that's a big step in itself. But where to from here? I believe you need to find your comfort zone, explore it, expand it until you're happy with it. My comfort zone and yours and different - so is that of all the other people out there. Try to not get caught up in what other people are thinking and listen to your own feelings, not what you think some unknown they thinks. Denial of your own self - your feelings and comfort - will make you unhappy and frankly the anonymous 'they' will not respect you for that either.

 

I agree with everyone who said "crazy" is subjective. My daughter (13) got me into the doll collecting hobby, and then dropped out of it because she wanted to pursue her own thing. So I continued to get my own dolls and I enjoy them as I would enjoy a work of art. Since when was appreciating a work of art or sculpture considered "crazy"? Or even immature? If you want to display your dolls for others to see then think about investing in a beautiful glass display just to show and keep the rest for your eyes only.

 

Nobody seems to raise the problem of the job interview.
I have been asked what were my hobbies in past interviews. In fact, I have found some interviews particularly intrusive. I have many hobbies and, presently, do not see why I should mention them to an interviewer. The last time I did, I wasn't believed. Obviously, my disclosure did not fit the info that particular interviewer collected from outside and/or out-of-date sources. I find the 'what are your hobbies' a particularly damaging question, as the view the interviewer will have of you will often be based on a subjective evaluation. One interviewer thought the word 'hobby' was similar to: 'being very good at it' and 'one and only hobby'. He couldn't handle the fact that I could go from one hobby to the other and then back without a problem. It just didn't fit with his vision of the world.

The 'crazy doll lady' sticker is a pretty big problem in my view if you are of working age.

There is nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about the hobby as said previously. But I wouldn't advertise it either.

 

@hobbywhelmed, thank you!

 

idk, man, idk... the other day I was walking back home from school (driving lessons :P) and my neighbour was walking there too and so we talked a little and she just told me that yet another of my ex class mates (so a peer is getting married. In my village (it's very small and everyone knows everyone else there were 5 more kids with whom I was going to the same grade. Nowadays, they're all either engaged or just married already. And what do I have? dolls and school. Nevermind i'm doing my PhD and the 'school''s one of the best unis in my country and I also lecture there while most of my friends work in a supermarket/roadworks-kinda stuff, plus the dolls are 'adult collectibles/artist dolls' that most of them would never buy bc the price, but, man... I just feel like that one weird kid on my way to become that one weird doll lady. Forever going to school and playing with dolls, while other ppl already dealing with diapers, electricity bills, washing the dishes and all this adult stuff :3 Am I afraid of remaining that 'crazy doll lady'? Damn, yeah... not gonna lie

on the other hand... idk, but i'd rather have fewer problems throughout my whole life, and if already - problems such as 'omg my bjd hasn't arrived yet omg' or 'damn, these eyes totally don't suit her character, dammit!' than some real life stuff... As long as i'm not looking like a weird hobo, with doll parts hanged around my garden on the trees, and my house emptied, looking as haunted as that from Faulkner's 'rose for emily' etc... then i think it's alright-ish :3

 

I've always been a doll collector. I tried being 'too mature for it' for a couple years, and then developed a hardcore MH addiction. i was also avidly trying to customize other dolls into a fictional character I'd been fond of. I found the doll, but I didn't have a job, and iplehouse Carina was expensive. I see my doll stuff as an offshoot of my addiction to creative writing, which, I guess allows me to justify it. I don't fear being a crazy doll lady, cause I'm already a crazy writer, haha

 

I wasn't until I started looking at getting another doll while waiting for my first one to get in.... D:

 

Not really. I am who I am, and if someone doesn't like it, then they probably aren't worth me knowing either. I learned a while ago that life is too short to not do and be who you really are.

 

I can totally relate to feeling conflicted between "elegant and mature" and "this thing is so fun and cute!" Plus, I'm really small and young-looking, so I have to work harder to convince people that I'm a competent adult. I often worry about undermining all that effort with Disney jewelry or an oversized sweater...

What I've decided, though, is that it's not so much a matter of what you buy or do or wear, it's how you do it. Almost anything can be made to look elegant by the way it's cared for and presented (or, on the flip side, a lack of care can make even nice things look cheap and tacky). With enough confidence and poise, you can synthesize all sorts of things into the lifestyle you want.

As for dolls specifically, I might suggest putting careful thought into how they're displayed. Don't try to hide them or tuck then away in a corner; if you display them as worthy objects, I think people are more likely to accept them as such, compared to if they're piled somewhere in your room like common children's toys. If possible, get some kind of designated shelf or display case. If you don't have the space for that, then at least keep them clean, groomed, and un-cluttered.

It may not work for you, but that would be my style, anyway.

 

like many of you i don't care. it"s my life and my hobby and I should enjoy it. besides I think i have veried enough interests and many different things in my life that keeps me busy so all of my time isn"t devoted to any one thing. I wish I had more time actually!

 

Back when I first told my fiance that I wanted to buy my first BJD, I was scared. However, he didn't care. I should have known given his interest in things like Warhammer 40K.