Dolls and money: guilt trips over spending?

I do feel guilty, specialy right now with the crisis going on :/
But even now... I haven't been able to get my first boy a body because I have no money.
Then again I think about it and say to myself: "No I don't feel guilty because I'm getting something I earned myself." (that's when I had my part time job XD, not anymore *is unemployed* >: )

We all feel guilty from time to time, it's only human ^^

 

I find your lack of faith in charity strange...esp since you live in a city that was heavily affected this summer by a hurricane. Thank goodness there are people that give to charities like the Red Cross...otherwise many in your community probably wouldn't have shelter, clothes, food etc after the storm.

Dolls are great, but people come first. I believe that if you are fortunate enough to be able to buy such luxury items, then you should be generous and share some with your fellow man in need. Maybe you don't think $50 will do a lot of good but it will. Esp when you think of thousands and thousands of generous and unselfish people that do give.

This thread makes me wonder if the idea of "it's my money I'll do what I want" and the overall sense of entitlement is the mindset of the younger generation nowadays? If so, I find it sad and disturbing.

 

I guess when I wote that earlier it came off worse that i meant it to sound :/

But meh, relating to the whole hurricane thing, the only thing ive heard/seen of the charity's doing is givining out food and clothes, fema was really what ive noticed in charge of shelter and they did a shitty job of it, considering you had to drive (the phone lines were down) to every single hotel on the island which was full, if you didnt get back to the island fast enough, some of the hotels didnt even get repaired at that time and still had mold in the 1st floor of some.

But I just dont like giving to those overseas chairtys I hear soo many scams about those and local ones too ><!
I just have alot of mixed feeling about charitys @_@
I just suppose im a very paranoid person, plus I work part time(10hrs a week ><!) and I got stuff to pay for and I have a very bad habit to spend my money when im upset, so the whole buying dolls actualy is helping me motivate myself to not spend it on frivillas crap and to save my money.

/minirant off

 

I dunno about the US but here in Germany, we got an organisation that checks up on charities and actually gives them a seal of approval if they're good. Before I signed up to sponsor that little kid in Kenya, I looked up the organisation there and as it had the seal, I went ahead. Is there anything reliable like this in the US?

On topic: On January 1st, I finally ordered and paid my Akando. I did feel a bit like "Gee, I coul spend that money on more useful things!" W'ell, I'm getting him and if the two of us really don't click, I can always try to sell him and use the money I get for him for said useful things ...

 

As I see it, I would end up spending the cash on meaningless junk and packages of peanuts anyway, so why not wait a while, let it collect, and get something beautiful and hi-qual? If it's really what I want, then it's what I will do. It's better than having a bunch of old posters or shoes or ramen lying around...wait, ramen lying around? O.O

 

Heck no!
I work hard for my money...
I don't think you should feel guilty for buying somehting that makes you happy! It's never anyones fault for the lifestyle/environment they were born into.
A great idea, rather than donating money would be to donate your time! This way you know your contribution is going for the better of the mission. I am a Volunteer Recruiter...there is nothing more precious you could give to some one than your self/time.

I am gonna give two quotes:

"It is not how much we give, but how much love we put in the giving"
"If you cannot feed a thousand, then feed just one"

Remeber change starts within!

I've found if I am not moved to act on something I feel is unjust...I don't get upset by it.​

 

hmm... I only feel guilty when I impulsively buy a doll instead of a wii or ps3 i saved long to eventually buy. well, something has to give, video games or a dollie?

 

There is something like that, I just can't think of what it's called. My cousin's used it before and it rates charities depending on how much of the money you give actually goes to doing what the charity advertises. I don't blame people for not immediately trusting different organizations, because there are those that are either not very efficient or down right scams. However, a little research can tell you what you need to know and there are good charities out there. If nothing else, there are local food banks that are really hurting for supplies.

 

I have felt guilty, but for different reasons. "You know, this money I'm spending on my doll, I could be putting towards getting ahead on my car payment, or, I could be using for other reasons, like say, my grad school program, or the GRE." And sometimes, I take money out of my doll fund and use for others things, like birthday presents for friends or my nieces. I did that this holiday season.

But, on the flip side, it's not like anyone on this forum (I'm guessing) can just pull 3,000 dollars, francs, or euros just on a whim and buy a Volks plus accessories while a Charles Dickens' character is shivering outside their doorstep begging for food. Most people here save and save and save for it. I'll go out on a limb here and say that we work hard to afford our BJDs.

I volunteered with a lot of programs at my local homeless shelter, and if you want a good dose of "down on your luck" folks, that's the place to go. And yes, when I think of the children there, I DO feel guilty. However, I also realize that there are hundreds of people who are far better off than I am, who don't do half as much as I have done. It's not my place to condemn them for not spending their money the way I see fit, and so, it's not going to do me much good feeling guilty for purchasing a sixteen dollar wig, or a 300 dollar doll, or even a 600 dollar doll, whatever the case may be. It's a slippery slope to do that, and if I start there, soon I'll feel guilty about buying books and magazines to read, and from there, I may as well feel guilty about buying the brand of shampoo I buy instead of the cheaper options. You know?

 

I agree with Farie_speak.
Actually, I do not feel bad because I personally think it is just so called life. Life is not fair. Some people can buy everything they want, some people like us, who have to save money or someother sacrfies to buy these "luxuries", and some people have to worry their life, their next meal....
I think people should take the actual action if they feel bad...hand out basic essentials to them in your person....

Some of my friends always says want to save the enviroment, and reduce the air polution, so they only drive car when they really in the time issue. Otherwise, they take bus...
I know some people say they feel bad or guilty to other people while they are spending on luxuries(not only dolls, but bag, or clothes, accesories...) everytime but do nothing and keep spending...I really do not understand what they try to say and I think it is very ironic.

 

For those of you worried if your money is going to a worthy charity, why not donate your time instead? Go work at a homeless shelter, help build stuff for Habitat for Humanity, help out at a soup kitchen, or even donate some blood. You're helping people out and you get to see direct, immediate results of your actions.

To get back to the original question...for me, it really depends on the price of the doll. I can save up for the cheaper dolls without feeling terribly guilty. They're not too much money, and I know they'll be loved and played with. The more expensive guys really give me a guilt trip. And it's not just about charity work. I could be using that money on more "practical" things: improving the house, paying the bills, or (especially in today's economy) putting it into savings.

 

Where is that $800 for a doll going? Isn't not going into a black hole. It's going to the company and/or artist who produced the doll, and they are using it to feed their family. I suppose some of those artists and company workers might be rich, but I'd bet most of them aren't.

 

I actually get a guilt trip if I DONT spend anything on them over a long period. I havent bought anything since October, and the dolls craved some new stuff (or me craving to spend money on someone else but myself)...

So 70 bucks spent on wigs to give them something else to play with. Saving for a special doll at the moment (if I dont chicken out and buy pukis instead) so no more mindless spending.

 

Just posting to say that I have removed a really inappropriate and fairly off-topic comment and several responses to it.

 

My grandparents put me thru a guilttrip.
I really didn't care.
I wanted a new friend. A BJD.

 

I guilt myself some times, and I get guilted by my parents quite a bit. I know this hobby is expensive and there are people out there without food and decent water...but I still work hard for my money and I can spend it any way I like. It's not my fault that I was born in the UK and life is a bit easier for us here.

I do like to help with social and business issues though, and I am involved in the Fair Trade movement helping the Liverpool group set up events and things like that to promote Fair Trade. I've met some people from Ghana, talked with them, nibbled their gorgeous FT chocolate and learned about their lives. I don't think that me spending $300 on a doll diminishes the passion I put into promoting their produce and helping them sustain their businesses.

 

I feel very guilty when I spend money, not just on dolls, but on anything, I don't really know why I'm that way. I guess I just worry that I'll need that money in the future, and then it won't be available because of my extensive doll collection. I do donate to charity, and I also do a lot of volunteer work, so I feel less guilty about that aspect of spending money... but I do have those moments where I feel like I could always do more.

 

Exactly. Friends out of the hobby and family may criticize our purchases, but in all honesty, how is this hobby any worse than, say, collecting crystal sculptures? Or framed art? It's just that we get to play with our "art".

I think if anyone here starts to feel too guilty about their doll, go ahead and take a look at the Saks Fifth Ave. website and see how much Prada bags go for. And I can name four people, right now, who own more than three Prada bags and shoes.

 

Guilt is a weird thing. Like with Misdy two posts ago; you can donate to charity and volunteer your time and still feel guilty and worry that you should have done more. I am in that category. On the other hand I believe that the creation and enjoyment of beautiful things is a critical, beautiful part of life. You need something wonderful coming in to have something to give. For myself I need to contribute through giving to charities so I feel that I am helping out even if it does seem like a drop in the bucket. I also collect amazing dolls.

I have to add that I totally agree that the money from this industry supports people through creating jobs. Maybe we should all be thinking how lucky we are to be able to have amazing sculptures for only $700 or however much their doll costs. We can own the work of an amazing artist from the other side of the world AND we are allowed to alter the artists work if we want to! The artist gets to be an artist and we get to play.

 

I'd feel more guilty spending thousands of dollars on vacations like some of my friends do.

I couldn't cough up that kind of money for something that only lasts a few days! @_@