Dolls and your children

- Did you start collecting dolls before or after you had kids? If after, how old were your children at the time?
I bought my first doll only a few months before I got pregnant.

- Do your kids like to participate in your hobby, are they neutral observers, or do they dislike it?
My seven month old baby observes, I guess. I'm not sure but I think she gets a bit jealous if she wants my attention and I happen to be doing something with the dolls (but then, she wants my attention 90% of the time). At other times, when I hold her close the dolls, she just looks at them, but she's not that interested. She tried to grab the doll's dress once or twice though, but again, she's not that interested.

- Where do you keep your dolls, and can your children get to them?
My baby daughter can't reach them, defnitely.

- Have you ever felt guilty buying doll things for yourself, even when your children are already provided for?
Yes. >.> But I got over it. And now I don't feel that way anymore. Afterall, my daughter has everything she needs.

 

- Did you start collecting dolls before or after you had kids? If after, how old were your children at the time?
I started collecting dolls when I was super pregnant, into the first months of my daughters life.

- Do your kids like to participate in your hobby, are they neutral observers, or do they dislike it?
My daughter loves dolls and even has a few collectors dolls herself!

- Where do you keep your dolls, and can your children get to them?
My dolls are well out of reach of my daughter but I do worry about the day she gets a chair and can finally get her hands on them :/

- Have you ever felt guilty buying doll things for yourself, even when your children are already provided for?
Always. Any good mother would feel a little guilty whether she should or not. Its hard not to. I even feel guilty buying new underwear for myself when I could get Ruby a new pink hat, even if she has ten at home in other colors.....Its a mom curse.

 

I'm just going to pop in here again--I have to add another 2 cents to the guilt issue.

It seems (at least in US culture) many parenting book today instill parents with the (faulty) idea that we as parents are 100% responsible for our children's behaviors, thoughts, feelings and actions. That cannot be, even when our children are newborn babies. You can have a clean, fed, healthy warm baby, who you are rocking, cuddling and doing everything you know how to comfort, who is just still uncomfortable and crying.

My point--there is a balance as to what parents can do for their children, and that every parent eventually finds that limit. A happy parent is one who has discovered the comfortable balance between keeping his or her head above water and giving his or her child the right amount of attention.

I think both parents who stay home with their kids and those who work need to have hobbies. It keeps us much more true to ourselves, and keeps us from losing our identities in our roles as parents. BJDs have really helped me in this regard.

I really have enjoyed seeing many of you posting that yes, you did feel guilty, but you got over it. And yeah, I know that guilt is going to be there to some degree. And I have to work past it to justify spending time and money on myself. But the adage remains: A happy mom makes a happy house.

 

One of the girls share my love of BJD doll because she is an artist and can see something in them to draw. She loves animae But my other daughter is scared of them and they all creep her out. My sons dont care...

 

Hiya - interesting thread!

- Did you start collecting dolls before or after you had kids? If after, how old were your children at the time?

After first one, before second one - both girls!

- Do your kids like to participate in your hobby, are they neutral observers, or do they dislike it?

I tried to involve the older one, but although she admires my dolls, she isn't really interested in them nor has she expressed an interest in having one of her own. She is now twelve, and her hobbies are very much governed by the desire to 'fit in' with her friends. To my amusement, they ALL read and draw manga but she hasn't suggested drawing my dolls. Maybe I'll suggest it! The younger one is at the stage where animals and representations of them (teddies, plushes) are FAR more interesting than people.
- Where do you keep your dolls, and can your children get to them?
My antique dolls are in unlocked cabinets, my BJDs pose around on my dressing table. They are accessible, but both kids seem to class them with the china and glassware as 'grown up' ornaments. I play with/sort out my dolls when they're not around, mainly because incoming hugs/kisses are a danger to all concerned when you have a floor littered with sewing sundries, a hand full of needles or glass eyes or a mouthful of pins!
- Have you ever felt guilty buying doll things for yourself, even when your children are already provided for?
Of course! But as others have eloquently pointed out, to be a parent is to be in a permanent state of non-specific guilt, and as I'm a Catholic, I get a double dose!
Although, as a parent, you buy the kids enough presents that are total misses even if they wanted them badly and you thought they'd love them to not feel too guilty about buying stuff you know you not only want but will still want in six months!

 

Hiya - interesting thread!

- Did you start collecting dolls before or after you had kids? If after, how old were your children at the time?

After first one, before second one - both girls!

- Do your kids like to participate in your hobby, are they neutral observers, or do they dislike it?

I tried to involve the older one, but although she admires my dolls, she isn't really interested in them nor has she expressed an interest in having one of her own. She is now twelve, and her hobbies are very much governed by the desire to 'fit in' with her friends. To my amusement, they ALL read and draw manga but she hasn't suggested drawing my dolls. Maybe I'll suggest it! The younger one is at the stage where animals and representations of them (teddies, plushes) are FAR more interesting than people.
- Where do you keep your dolls, and can your children get to them?
My antique dolls are in unlocked cabinets, my BJDs pose around on my dressing table. They are accessible, but both kids seem to class them with the china and glassware as 'grown up' ornaments. I play with/sort out my dolls when they're not around, mainly because incoming hugs/kisses are a danger to all concerned when you have a floor littered with sewing sundries, a hand full of needles or glass eyes or a mouthful of pins!
- Have you ever felt guilty buying doll things for yourself, even when your children are already provided for?
Of course! But as others have eloquently pointed out, to be a parent is to be in a permanent state of non-specific guilt, and as I'm a Catholic, I get a double dose!
Although, as a parent, you buy the kids enough presents that are total misses even if they wanted them badly and you thought they'd love them to not feel too guilty about buying stuff you know you not only want but will still want in six months!

 

I think it is important to still have "me time" once you have your children.

 

My bjd just came last month, when my daughter was already 3.5 years. It seems to me, she thinks that the doll is a real girl I explaned to her that this is not a toy, "you can look and even touch a bit, but only in my presence, and don't ever touch the face". She understood perfectly! So now she treats the doll like a treasure, stares at her and asks something like, ''Why does she sit like that? what is she looking at"..... IMO for the most part it depends on a child's temper and how you manage to cope with him/her.

 

Well, how many children actually dislike toys. My dolls have been around since the kids were very young. I started with vinyl and swapped to BJDs. I don't think they have any issues and recognised early that mum's dolls were different to theirs. I've only had a couple of problems with my youngest swiping my puki (she thinks the smallest should be hers) and a Dollzone Fox's ears going missing, never to be found again.

I feel guilty at times because I now have a large collection and now want to start focusing on improving the house and saving for an investment property. By the same token, the house we live in is paid for and the kids are certainly not going without to fund either my hubby's or my own hobbies so I guess we're enjoying a little break with cash in the bank before we have to go on the repayment treadmill. Plus realistically, there is only so long that the AUD will be as high as it is presently and then the hobby will look very differently to how it does today. I figure I'm making hay while the sun shines.

 

Did you start collecting dolls before or after you had kids? If after, how old were your children at the time?
After. I just found out about BJDs last year. I only have one little boy who is now 1 and a half. I guess he was 14 months when I got my first doll.

Do your kids like to participate in your hobby, are they neutral observers, or do they dislike it?
He doesn't just because he is so little. He did come up to my first doll look her over and pat her on the head. Then he just walked off. (My husband was supposed to be watching him while I had Yvette out. Now I only bring out the dolls when he is asleep LOL)
Where do you keep your dolls, and can your children get to them?
I have a book shelf with a high closing cabinet. I keep them there and in a smaller sewing suitcase. He can't get to them. It will stay that way until I can trust him to handle them.
Have you ever felt guilty buying doll things for yourself, even when your children are already provided for?
I've never felt guilty because my son is already provided for. As long as I'm not taking anything away from him and I can pay my bills and keep enough money in savings I'm good. I do feel bad if I take too much out of savings. So far I've only done it once and I got it put back =D Next time I have to remember my hubby has hobbies too and maybe he had plans for the "extra" money. In our defense we usually tell each other plans for spending non bill money but this time we both had spent it before we talked to each other LOL Opps.

 

- Did you start collecting dolls before or after you had kids? If after, how old were your children at the time?
I started collecting dolls after my kids were all in school.
- Do your kids like to participate in your hobby, are they neutral observers, or do they dislike it?
My daughter loves to participate in all my hobby's,
- Where do you keep your dolls, and can your children get to them?
My dolls are kept in my room and my daughter does play with them she is very gentle with them.
- Have you ever felt guilty buying doll things for yourself, even when your children are already provided for?
Not at all as long as my kids have everything that they NEED i don't mind indulging in something for my self. ^_^

 

It is funny, I answered these questions almost two years ago and in those two years both of my children have developed an interest in BJD's. My oldest son is now 9.5 and for his last birthday he received his first BJD as a gift. Since then he has purchased his second BJD. He has also started attending some of the larger more relaxed meet ups in our area as well as anime conventions and the doll meet ups at conventions. My youngest son is 5 now and he received a DZ Leo for his 5th birthday after much begging. He is still to young for meet ups or conventions, he just can't hold still. Both of my boys are some of the best helpers I could ask for when I am working on my own dolls though. We have really become a family of doll collectors (Dh collects as well). I doubt I need to worry about them resenting the doll collecting when they get older.

 

Im "lucky" i dont have kids. But when i do (most likely i will adopt) i prob will juss have my buddies chillin sumwhere safe and wait for me until i have spare time to fiddle with them. =0

 

My children like to play with my dolls, and it's very nice, when I see them happily together!

 

Interesting topic. Most of the questions sound really familiar, since I'm dealing with them right now