Elitism - How much is perceived?

O_O I agree with your friend on experiences being important, but I'd never drop $300 on a single meal for one person. I hate dropping even $50-60 per person for dinner theater sort of events (though I have done it anyway a few times in the past). But with money, everyone has their own priorities for what they feel is worth spending money on and what is not.

I have only taken my dolls out of the house a few times ever, so I've never been asked how much they cost. I've been asked how much other expensive things I have cost sometimes. I just tell them that it was expensive enough they'd probably rather not know how much it costs. That seems to get people to stop asking, at least it does for me.

 

I haven't really noticed that much of elitism here. What is elitism? To critic someone? Critic based on facts not a bad thing, since when it have to be all sugar coated in this world? To say "my doll is better than yours"? Well, some dolls are better than others. People who make more input in their dolls will judge and look top down at people who take it easy, but show me the hobby free from that? Any hobby I know, from tuning sport cars to fashion blogging is like this.
I do not own any Volks and the only Volks I like is DD, and she is not even limited. And some limited who cost at least twice more, like Risa, who is very popular, looks bad to me. Would I tell this to the owner of a doll? I wouldn't, it is my opinion and I tell it if asked only usually. But I also wouldn't lie and say "ohmygosh, sobeautifulcantbelieve myeyes!!" if I think that doll looks bad, have bad clothes or really bad faceup. Yes, it's someone's else doll and they can do whatever they want (or able to) to do, but it's also my opinion, and I can have it as long as I feel it's right.

 

And this is exactly the problem. There are many rumour going on that DoA is an elitist forum, mostly started by those who've never even signed up here. Sometimes these rumours come from the fact that you need an invite to become a member, others think it's elitist to declare some dolls off-topic. I think they're reading too much into it. The mods do this to keep a massive forum manageable; they aren't the dolly-police telling everyone which doll you should or should not like. Off-topicness has nothing to do with the doll's 'standard'. Having to get an invite before you sign up doesn't mean that you are first screened to see if you'd be a 'worthy member', it's just to prevent people from signing up on a whim and then never come back, because all these ghost-accounts take up massive space.

Personally, Arashi Uchiha, I couldn't care less what your doll wears. You're happy with them and that's all that matters. And I don't know anyone who would snub you for dressing your dolls in sockdresses although they might show a preference if a discussion about the topic is started. But, having a preference =/= being snobby or elitist.

 

Don't forget it's also fueled by people who were banned for "doing nothing wrong". (Example: "There is totally nothing wrong with calling the mods *****, because they are.") In their opinion they were wrongfully banned and will express their opinion about their ban, DoA and the mods which is often not positive.
Or people are annoyed by getting their threads/posts locked, moved or deleted and will shout "OPPRESSION!" in the worst case. There are many rules at DoA and it's possible you don't like or agree with one or more. Perhaps some people think that if they label those rules negatively often enough, those rules will be changed.

 

As a new person here, I have only heard the rumours from other dolly boards and the like about DOA being far too serious or snobby for them. I'm a pretty much a Teflon princess so if I run into it, it wouldn't matter to me and I seriously doubt I would even find it important enough to be offended. There is good and bad everywhere and always people who tie far too much of their identity and pride into their possessions. You don't have to go far to see it. I say let them feel like they are superior and just get on with the things in life that are more important to you!

 

Besides, what's considered off topic for DoA does not branch off into real life. If I want to buy an OT Obitsu, I can; I just have to have the doll with one of my on-topic BJDs if I ever show them in a photo, or not show them at all. DoA's restrictions aren't for telling people what they can and cannot buy. They're for telling them what dolls are to be discussed, and what dolls aren't.

You just have to realize that DoA's rules extend to their forum, in cyberspace, and not in the rest of our lives.

 

I think elitists are those people who cannot accept the fact that you might find an expensive doll not that interesting. I had someone create a massive turmoil because I said I don't like Volks dolls. They insisted I was wrong. Now, how can I be wrong when it's my personal taste? :/ People who think a doll must be liked by all because they paid 2000usd for them is an elitist, in other words, an idiot.

I definitely do not consider myself one, but there are companies I don't like and companies that I like and if someone asks I will tell my opinion. What i wont do is enforce this opinion on other people.

 

I'm sorry, but for me, they are just dolls. Not BMWs or mansions. I don't see why there is so much drama in the BJD hobby about whom owns what and what that person decides for what their doll should look like. I feel that people should buy what they like, especially if they actually do really like the sculpt and not buying it to be popular in a doll hobby. :c

 

I don't know, but it scares me to think about it because my first doll is one of the "cheap" ones that I hear people put down. So far, nothing of alarm has happened, but then again, I've only been on DOA for a while.

 

You don't need to be scared. Being scared is just going to show people that they can bother you.

 

I don't really think anything will, either.

Your doll is your business. Unless you're specifically asking for a critique of something you've made or done, if anyone tries to make it their business, just leave the situation. If you go to a meet, and someone has it in them to basically go down a list of what's wrong with your doll, or you for wanting a doll from the company, move away. If there's no other place you can move to so you can still enjoy the meet, leave the meet. A meet is for fun, discussing dolls, and not putting down someone else's choices in doll brands.

People are welcome to not like any doll company they like - I have ones that I'm not too fond of - but if someone's dislike of a brand starts to interfere with other people, then they have problems.

 

There's absolutely no reason to be afraid of showing your doll on DoA. Resinsouls have a huge following here - please do check out the discussion threads

There is a strange perception that DoA is chock-full of elitists just waiting to pounce, but it's simply untrue.

I think if a person is expecting the worst, they'll find themselves so uncomfortable that they won't be able to reach out and make friends. If you keep an open mind it's so much better.

Elitism is a lot rarer than most people think. They majority of hobbyists don't care what others collect and are happy for you if you're happy.

 

There have been a few over the years... I recall something about everything that didn't come from Volks being called "piratical" once upon a time, and a statement somewhere along the line that hybrid dolls were all "abominations"... But things like that, and the people who honestly believe them, are definitely few and far between.

Elitists are a little like Bigfoot that way. They come up in horror stories and fourth-hand tall tales an awful lot, but when you get right down to it any real evidence that they might exist in the wild is rare and sketchy.

The clique-thing is true, though, and much more common. It's just a reflection of The Way Humans Are. It's the nature of the beast when you have large groups of people together.

 

Every person is wired differently. They have their own opinions about most things ( anything under the sun i suppose) . But this doesnt mean , they can be tactless and rude to some point. But for us to enjoy the hobby we need to concentrate on exchanging info, and not the bad parts of it . Afterall , we are all human beings. No ones perfect and that applies in all situations.
If by any chance one encounters unsavory characters, in certain situations, take the high road and ignore.

 

I loved your analogy!

Besides, cliques aren't, in essence, bad things. It's natural that you gravitate towards a few people in a large group, and you all prefer to be around each other. I'm sure everyone on this forum has a group of friends that they tend to hang out with. Not all cliques are full of people trashing others and tearing them down.

And like I already mentioned, it's natural to dislike something. I don't care if someone doesn't like the brands/sculpts my dolls come from. What isn't acceptable is someone bullying or threatening me on my brand choices, or damaging my dolls because they happen to be at the meet up.

 

I wish we could just replace the word "Elitist" with "Purist". When people talk about "elitism", they are almost overwhelmingly referring to people who only collect Volks. Volks started the whole thing, and I can understand people who have a "Purist" attitude in that they only want to collect the original concept. I don't find anything negative about having a Purist approach to collecting.
I'm the same way about coffee. I only drink black espresso (maybe with a little lemon zest). To me it is the purest form of coffee. I hate frou-frou coffee drinks like mochachinos, hazelnut coffee, etc., and would never in a million years drink one. But that doesn't mean I can't go to Starbucks with you and share a table (although Starbucks espresso, frankly....meh).
Same thing with dolls. If someone wants to stick to just Volks, that's fine with me. IN GENERAL I have not experienced this snootiness other people report. I don't collect Volks, I have one, and she isn't my favorite. But I can certainly appreciate other people loving them- in fact at the meet I went to this weekend someone had a beautiful Lieselotte. I don't think I would ever get one, because I am very hard on my dolls and I wouldn't want to damage such a beautiful and expensive doll. But I could certainly appreciate her and I loved talking to her owner and could see the love she had for her doll.
But I also enjoyed talking to people who had Doll Zone or Bobobie dolls and they loved theirs just as much.
The truth is- it all comes down to manners and being open-minded on both ends of the spectrum, and never making assumptions about other people based on the dolls they like.

 

That is actually a much better way to look at this issue. If people were not so quick to think it's a bad thing that some only collect one company, people in the hobby could get a long so much better, because it's not a bad thing. Just so long as no one is making anyone feel bad for having different tastes.

 

It might've started off just a Volks thing, but now it's kind of morphed into something different... something along the lines of "I'm the 'authority' on ALL aspects of BJD collecting". It's been used too much; people have been throwing the accusation around liberally enough that it's lost it's 'bite'. I think the word/accusation has no meaning to most people. I think I mentioned something on this thread over a year ago, and I said a good alternative might just be old-fashioned "snobbery".

What you're mentioning is the fact that people can prefer the original over other brands, other styles, and other companies. Having a preference is good - everyone has one. It's when you openly start trying to control other people's choices (I think this is the third time I said this, ) is when you start acting in the 'Elitist' behavior people fear.

Having a preference, be it for Volks dolls, glass eyes, or not modding a rare sculpt doesn't secretly mean they're telling people what to do/buy. Most likely, it just means that if they had the money/ability, they'd buy a bunch of their favorite Volks sculpts, glass eyes, and keep the rare head untouched. Unless it's very obvious that they're explicitly trying to dictate what people should do (actual insults/bullying, or harming property at meet ups), I'd call it a preference and leave it at that.

 

When I had made that comment I was new to the site and heard enough horror stories to make me tempted to hide with my tail between my legs and my doll not far off. But I've found my stay here enjoyable plus picked up some tips and tricks.