Ever feel selfish for owning a BJD?

If you have a roof over your head, food in the kitchen, lights, a way to work, and a job... if you have the necessities, you finances in order, and have money left over, that is your money to do as you please with it. If you buy these dolls because they make you happy, you keep on buying them. You only have one life to live (or so it seems) and you should live it making yourself feel happy and fullfilled, not feeling guilty.

You're only selfish if you choose to use that money for dolls when you could use it for something that is clearly more important (like if your car needs to be fixed, but you buy that new Soom instead).

Many of us work hard, save, and make sacrifices to afford this hobby. These dolls can be seen as a reward for saving, patience, and that hard work. You don't have to feel guilty or selfish for that.

 

I think this is one of the main reasons I can't enjoy my dolls as much as I should. Although my family has been supportive and tell me I deserve it seeing as I've been a single mom and supporting everyone alone for so long, I still feel guilty. Granted I don't spend money on other things and my kids all have everything they need so it's not impeding anything. I hope soon I can stop feeling so guilty and give the dolls the love they deserve.

 

Sometimes I feel I spend too much money on dolls. But I obviously thought I would prefer to spend that money on dolls rather than anything else, and I don't regret it... I would be spending the money on something else, probably, but I don't want anything else more than dolls at the moment. I could save it, but right now, I don't need to save it... So maybe it is not such a big problem!

 

No way!
I buy what I want. If my bills are paid...whateve.
I'm in the opposite though...
Like what can I do without in the shortest amount of time to get the most money to buy a new doll/face-up/clothes.
It's funny someone mentioned Starbucks. That's usually the first thing I think of any sadly it's the hardest for me to stop.
What's embarrassing is the amount of money I spend on coffee in a year...

 

I'm 62 and I always seem to always have had expensive hobbies (making and competing fantasy costumes nationwide is not cheap) so BJD's are no different. As long as it's my money and the bills are paid, it's nobody else's business. Besides, think of all the artisans you are keeping solvent. Artisans have to eat too. :-)

 

Nope! I earn my own money and if I pay my bills I can spend the rest on what I want. I'm not extravagant much and I try to keep my doll , indeed all my extraneous, purchases down.

 

Not selfish but, maybe, wasteful? I probably could have paid off my student loans or something with all of the money I've spent on dolls. Although I've got some sickly pets too, and sometimes a specialist vet visit costs as much as a doll...so I don't think the dolls are a big problem in the long run. At least you can choose what you spend on them!

 

There's a lot of expensive hobbies out there. Some people collect cars, some antiques, some art. As long as it hurts no one else (like depriving their children, etc.), then people should do what makes them happy. This hobby satisfies me and makes me happy. Sure, it is a bit of an expense, but why shouldn't I invest in myself? That should be the #1 thing you invest in unless you have children or family to support. Even in that case, it should still be high up on the list, right after them.

So do I feel selfish? I think the question should be, why should I? I pay my bills on time, use my own money to buy them. It hurts no one, and I love looking at them and finding things for them. I like tinkering with their story, imagining what their characters do in their day-to-day life, their likes and dislikes.

People that try to guilt trip me about what I do with my money I find insufferably rude. No one has the right to do that to me. I don't even like people that are nosy about my finances. I find that rude, too. I'm an adult, I've been on my own for several years now. I've never defaulted on a loan, never been sent to collections, and rarely if ever am I late paying a bill. I don't discuss my paycheck, my finances or how much the things I own cost with people because it is NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS. It's no one's business but mine.

 

Nope! haha
I look at it this way: I work hard for the money I earn.
I'm responsible with everyday expenses etc, and I save money on the side for my dolls.

 

I don't really feel selfish. I mean, it's my money I spend on it that I worked hard for, not someone else's money. I would not feel comfortable spending someone else's money on a doll. Sometimes I do feel a little guilty and I ask myself "do I really need to spend this amount of money on a doll?". But then I look at their sweet faces and I can't help but feel proud ^^.

 

I have lots of hobbies and other activities and try to spend my money evenly throughout all of them, doll included, so I guess in that way I don't feel selfish.

 

I do feel guilt because I'm disabled and unable to work so I get disability from the government. Three of my dolls (two gone now) were bought when I was in a better place financially and I saved for them. My last one was bought after saving up even though I wasn't in a good place financially. I'm planning for another when I get my Christmas money from my Grandparents because I'm spending most of the year saving for something else that I've been wanting for over 10 years. And guess what I feel guilty about it too. I struggle to pay my bills sometimes and some months are worse than others just like some are better.

However, my dolls make me happy. I have a lot wrong with me emotionally so anything that makes me happy is encouraged. I don't go into debt over my dolls or any other hobby, I watch my bank account closely. Still I feel bad owning such nice things when I'm this down and out because everyone always assumes you can't have these things, all your stuff should be junk or second-hand. It's mainly why I don't tell a lot of people about my dolls, much less their pricing, because I don't want them to say, "well how come you can afford dolls but not x?"

 

I am not feeling selfish, as I pay my rent, other bills I have, and pay my part on groceries and such and get some quality food for my kitties. The rest of the money I can spend as I like (as I am an adult).

And even if my partner complains how expensive BJDs are, he spends as much to his vintage car repairs and guitars.

 

I feel selfish in the sense that it is the single most expensive thing I've ever bought that doesn't contribute to my education, nuture anything, or help me socialize, and it focuses energy on a single thing that does not benefit anyone but my own amusement.

But I also consider that there are many different hobbies and pieces of art that people spend thousands of dollars on (I know Lionel trains or football game tickets can go for $500 apiece), and I can justify it that I'm in a point of my life where my location is in constant flux, I live alone, and my work consumes most of my time anyway so what free time I have, I want to spend on something relaxing that makes me happy.

 

Same here, but I do figure that if I didnt have hobbies I would probably go a little bit insane, because sometimes, you need an outlet. It doesn't stop me from feeling guilty, but it does help me justify spending the money on them, and it's not like I can't pay my bills because of buying dolls.

 

I sometimes take a step back and think about how much money goes into the dolls I have and have those moments of doubt. But then I consider this: 1) I pay all my bills that I need to, 2) money is meant to be spent (as long as you have some squirreled away in a savings), and 3) everybody has their Cadillacs. My mom's dad /loved/ cadillacs. He got them even when maybe he shouldn't have. And it got me thinking. Everyone has /something/ that they put money into. A hobby, a passion, a sport, etc. And as long as you're not going into debt and being responsible, you have the right to spend money on what you want.

 

I am totally in the minority in that YES, I feel guilty and selfish for what I spend on my doll hobbies!!!

I always pay my rent, student loans, credit cards, & other expenses on time. I'm also saving up for a house, and every penny I spend on dolls I think "that's another $20 that's not going to my down payment." It's so hard to stop buying stuff for them, and I feel horrible, even when I'm enjoying the beautiful, nice new things I bought for this hobby!

Fortunately, you all post such lovely photos of your dolls, so I can live vicariously through you while I save!

 

Definite yes. I feel really guilty, mainly because I get allowance for doing jobs around the house and selling old gaming consoles and games (all mine, that I paid for by myself), but my mother refuses to spend more than 5$ on herself. (She's always said that when she quits smoking she'll be worthy of spending money on, but with my stepdad being a horrible person he stresses her out and she can never really quit.) Then again she's told me constantly not to feel guilty, since she loves doing sewing projects and the like with them, so it's like it's for both of us. Though my Dad's side of the family has always given me crap for drawing and writing-"Why waste time with something like that? It doesn't have a place in society anymore and all artists and writers are 40 year olds living in their parent's basement"-so their criticism of my dolls doesn't hurt as much because I know they don't support me anyways. Although now that I'm homeschooled I feel as if I'd go insane without some kind of hobby. Though I've always said that it shouldn't matter what makes me happy, and that no one has a right to say anything about what makes me happy, it does get to me sometimes.
And besides, my dad has run his wife, my sister, and newborn baby brother into debt with his fishing and other hobbies. As soon as he criticized me over my 200$ doll I instantly pointed out how he had just spend their whole food budget for the month (500$)on stuff at Academy he shut up and has never said anything else about my doll's cost.
People have other expensive hobbies that are perfectly 'acceptable' to people, even if they run their families into the ground, but God forbid I spend 200$ on a doll. I think most of what makes people be so critical about the doll hobby is that they relate doll = Toy = childish. Though I've taken to calling them 'Art dolls' or 'Character dolls' to others since just 'Doll' or 'Bjd' seems to create instant stigma.

 

I really don't. I give myself a little slap if I start to feel that way, because life is short, and these dolls make me happy. Occasionally when I feel myself getting woozy at the thought of that chunk of money about to go out for a doll, I stop and ask myself - what else could I possibly spend that money on that would give me this much fulfillment? Anything? Does anything come to mind? Suddenly it seems like a bargain.

 

Well dolls are a luxury and like luxury goods I feel that I should only buy when I can spare the money. Ultimately it's your money, provided you work for it or save up for it, do what you want.(after setting aside some for bills, transport, food, savings).

Some people don't understand how we can spend so much on expensive dolls but more often than not I am willing to bet they have owned a branded bag or shoes or clothes (that they don't necessarily have to buy) at some point or other.