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Falling out of love with your Grail?

Dec 24, 2019

    1. My long-time grail is avaialble for sale in the actual shop right now... and I just see I’m not in love with it anymore. It’s a weird feeling. I have the money, I have the opportunity, the product would be brand new and reasonably priced and yet something in my belly tells me... I don’t want her.

      Has anyone had that before?

      Do you have those ex-grails that you can now look at and feel nothing?

      Is it a matter of change of taste or is it so that you were waiting for so long you got used to the feeling of being deprived and now feel indifference towards the sculpt?

      Share your thoughts on your *ex*grail dolls! :)
      • x 6
    2. I don't have any grails yet, so I'm not sure... But I'd say you've probably waited for so long you made peace with not having the doll. Like maybe you got over it? At least that's how I am with a doll I'm waiting for.
      • x 6
    3. I had 3 grails and finally adopted 2 of them, Switch Ryun, Crobidolls YS & OE Roderich from LLT. After trial of faceup and outfit for a few times, my mind is different and I do not addicted to them anymore.
      Recently there is a last release for Ryun, but I am calm. Time changes our interests and aesthetics. Your favorite singer or actor will be different in different stages of your life, same concept for dolls. We always have more choices in the future.
      Now I focus on new release dolls, confirm that i will not regret if i do not purchase them during release period.
      • x 7
    4. It happens! I don’t really have “grails”, but there was one doll that I particularly liked, everything about it was perfect. I went to extreme lengths to purchase it, and I did love it for about a year. Eventually though my tastes changed, engineering issues annoyed me more and more, and I sold the doll. I have zero regrets and do not miss it, even though it had been so important to me at the time! Sometimes these things just don’t do it for you any more.
      • x 6
    5. the actor comparison is so relatable! When you're a teen you think these musicians will 'stay with you" for ever, but a few years later you resell all the albums and or wonder why you ever listened to them in the first place lol :D

      @nattherat yes! posability really influences the linking of dolls! <3
    6. Some time ago I ordered one of my grails. She is available as a blank doll, but I waited until I got my first pay. For me the deciding point was her facial features. When I finally ordered her, I hadn't really planned her skin tone, bust size etc. I went for a little darker peachy tone and larger bust.

      Upon her arrival she was packed so that the only thing visible was her breasts, and being enhanced like that and all, it immediately struck me they are huge and unnaturally round. As if that wasn't enough, I have had the doll for about six months now, and the skin color disturbs me more every day. In real life it is really unnaturally dark pink, like cooked salmon, although it is supposed to be realistic, and blushing looks weird on it. Even my man who has about the pinkest skin I've ever seen is nowhere near it unless he gets severe sunburn.

      I have thought of two options to fix it. First, leaving her out of box to yellow, which I know would decrease the pink tone for sure, but so will it decrease her value if I won't bond nevertheless. The second is getting her head in another color that is more neutral and putting it on a body I like more. However, I feel that after going through all this struggle to bond with her at all and looking at her sitting in my corners being useless, it has left a negative aura on the very sculpt itself and I cannot fall in love with it anymore even in another color as I cannot help but think of my initial negative feelings about it.
      • x 2
    7. One thing I have learned in the many years that I have been in the hobby is that I don’t need to own every doll I find is “grail status” worthy. The hobby will have no shortage of dolls that lure our imagination, so I felt like I had fallen into this trap of never-ending dissatisfaction. As soon as I got a doll I was really excited about, a company put out some other doll I also liked—perhaps even more than the previous one—and suddenly my enjoyment of that first doll lessened to a point where I didn’t care about having it anymore. It can be a maddening cycle, especially considering that a lot of these dolls have a wait time and don’t just arrive to your door within some days (unless they’re in stock or second hand, of course!)

      Back in 2011 I had two “grails.” Or so I thought. A Supia Rosy and a Limhwa Half Elf. While I did get to own the Rosy some time after, I realized she fell into that category of dolls I absolutely love to admire, but not necessarily own. Some days I wish I still had her or think of getting her again, but I know it’s more a consequence of how much I like looking at pictures of this sculpt rather than an all-around enjoyment of owning the doll itself. Basically, I want everyone else to buy and style their Rosy’s so I can love on their pictures forever.

      My one true grail, the one I consider as such even now, came much later and I was very fortunate to find her at auction (considering she’s limited) but the high price tag often makes me feel a bit guilty of having her. I’ve thought about letting her go a couple of times. However, as soon as I get her out of the box, I feel this instant joy and connection that has rarely persisted with any other doll I have owned. I guess this is the sign she’s truly my grail after all. It’ll be our two year anniversary next March.

      For me, it’s totally acceptable to have a change of heart and you shouldn’t feel bad for having it. Sometimes you have no idea if a doll will truly work out until you have it. Likewise there are some who buy dolls they don’t think they’ll like that much, and they turn out to become their favorites in spite of low enthusiasm levels in the beginning. There’s no right or wrong way. At the end of the day, your happiness and enjoyment should be all that matters.
      • x 13
    8. Yes absolutely. When I first learned about BJDs I found D.O.D and fell in love with Ducan, when I began looking at dolls again later on I found Sooms Romantic Amber, both of them were all I wanted and I began saving up for them in case I ever found one. I then stumbled upon Switch and after falling in love with their sculpts I don't really care for Ducan or Amber anymore, only in a nostalgic sort of way. Yet, I think I would actually attempt to get them if I ever got the chance just to see if I could bond with them, since I still think they're lovely dolls
      • x 1
    9. Oh, it happens! And yes, it has happened to me. While I haven't gone so far as putting him up for sale, my LoongSoul ZhuZhao needs quite a lot of work for me to bond with him. I fell for his promo pics at first sight -- a kind of "OMG HE'S PERFECT FOR THE CHARACTER" instant ping that I hadn't felt since I first saw Granado Michael's reveal several years back.

      But now that he's home, blank and all, I found myself obsessing over some aesthetic issues that pretty much dampened my joy. Not exactly sure why -- my other dolls had their own "flaws" (be it hybriding proportion issues or simple basic engineering) that I saw upon arrival, and yet I eagerly overlooked them because I was so happy to finally have the doll, with or without faceup. It may be that I'm just impatient to get him assembled. I'm still in the process of making his ventilated wig, and he couldn't be sent to the faceup artist until then. Perhaps, once he gets the faceup, I'll fall in love with him all over again.
      • x 2
    10. I don't know if you'd call them "grail" dolls, but I have a lot of dolls I'l think I really really want but sour on with time (or non-company photos), or just decide not to try for because they're limited and I try to only seriously consider getting basics so I have time to save up for them. I also try to only commit to dolls I already have character ideas for.

      Years ago, when I first started the hobby, I was completely in love with Yder. But I never got him before Luts and Cerebus Project split, and I ended up shelling his character in another doll, and I just don't feel the need to chase after him anymore. I've also been considering some of the Resinsoul dragon hybrids for a while, but I've realized they'd be really annoying to pose.

      On the other hand, once I get a doll home I tend to stubbornly bond with them and make them work somehow even if they're not the character I originally thought they were. I don't think I could ever sell a doll I own (except maybe to someone I know), simply because it's not in my personality.
      • x 2
    11. It’s just over-thinking. There’s too much of that in the hobby, if you ask me. Get him if you want, or don’t, these dolls only exist to make us happy.
      • x 4
    12. Over my time in the hobby I've had a lot of dolls I wanted a lot, and a lot of "Dream Dolls" that I was never in the place to own, but only one real grail. I did buy him back in 2013 after circumstance left me with the money (he was and still is my most expensive doll by like $800) and I was lucky enough to find the full full-set. I had him as a full set for like, a week, then remade him the way I wanted (I kept all his things in his box though) and just recently decided he needed a fresh faceup so I was redoing him and you know, I still love him. He's still my grail. I never had another one and I doubt I will.

      However, he's not my favorite doll. He was never my favorite, and I knew that going in. He's not my current aesthetic, and I have a lot of other dolls that get way more attention. But I still consider him my "grail". A grail doll doesn't necessarily mean your favorite or most played with. It can just be that amazing sculpt you think is gorgeous (or in my case weird and adorable) and would love to own if the stars align and you have the money and one is available. Mine mostly sits on my shelf and I get him out every once in a while to change his clothes and display him at Halloween.
      • x 5
    13. I fell out of love with both of my grails and countless other dolls. I’ve found that I enjoy actively putting dolls together more than collecting a bunch of them.

      For the grails, I searched for both for years before I got them and I think I owned them each for less time that I had looked for them. The first had a beautiful head sculpt but I hated the default body so made him a hybrid. He was in brown tan skin so I researched for ages about what body would match, ordered one and waited a long time for it and...it wasn’t even remotely close in color or size. At all. I tried to make it work but I’m the end between the poor hybrid and inability to find the clothing style I wanted in his size and of high quality, I just gave up and sold him. All of the frustration really killed the doll for me.

      The other was adorable but because he was an old doll I had to buy secondhand and he was very yellow and had pierced ears, which I did not want. I did love for him for several years but in the end, it just bothered me too much, the lack of CoA and box made it even worse and the character’s story kind of dragged on then faded out, so I sold him, much cheaper than I had paid.

      I don’t really have a grail anymore. I think in my case, it just builds too much expectation, which leads to disappointment when I spend a fortune and don’t get exactly what I wanted/expected.
      • x 3
    14. Hmm never thought of him as a grail but l've aways wanted a Delf EL, he was one of the first bjd I ever saw, and I fell in love. This was over 10 years ago. Nowadays I still like the sculpt but grew out of the style. I don't know, maybe it's the wide eyes and thin upper lip, it's more anime-like and I guess my tastes changed a little. Not sure I would ever like to have him.
      • x 1
    15. Thank you all for your responses, they've been really helpful. I see that a lot of these grail-related feelings are generally dependant on the general attitude towards dolls. I like to have dolls that I "currently" like and I like to have them in similar aesthetic, so that I can take group photos (which I practically never get down to doing, eventually >.<). My ex-grail is actually LM Sophia dreaming version that nowadays leaves me feel indifferent. She is beautiful, sure, but not so special. And there was a time I was CRAZY about her xD Now I see there's plenty of other dolls that I find just as pretty or more and yet still not cool enough for me.

      Also, recently I see this atittude more and more often among people that it's enough just to look at others' photos without actually owning the sculpt. And it's sooo cool!
    16. This is why I never buy on impulse anymore - and boy, did I used to buy on impulse. :XD: I see dozens of sculpts that I fall for instantly - the unique features, the captivating expressions, whatever. And I really do love them! But if I go back and look at them dozens of times over many weeks, I often find that while I still think they're wonderful, I don't really need them.Same applies to a "grail." It may hit me hard on first and tenth sight, but after awhile it may also become a not so much. It's not really as much falling out of love as it is 'do I really need to look at it hundreds of times in the future'. If I can't tear my eyes away after a hundred views, the answer is probably yes - my first instinct was right, and I'll treasure it always. But a true grail is hard to come by, because I only think for awhile that it's the most amazing doll ever. If time passes and all I can work up is a bored yawn, then I'll just content myself with admiring owner pics...and that has happened more times than I can remember.
      • x 3
    17. Yes. It was Aoyoue from Loong Soul. I was happy I not bought him.
      • x 1
    18. I totally understand that feeling. I had it not that long ago and I'm really grateful I listened to my belly telling me that buying it wasn't the right thing to do. I have never bought out of an impulse, I always think very carefully about each purchase and create and OCs and everything before I press the "buy" button and that feeling really caught me off guard but now I'm sure I made the right choice.
      • x 2
    19. I recently fell out of love with my grail doll, Little Gem Adameli by Soom. I have a unicorn character that is very similar, it was almost like Soom made her for me! But she came out years ago and I've been lurking in the second-hand markets hoping she'd come up for me to purchase. I heard she would be re-released by Soom next month and panicked because I had just signed up for a layaway on another doll. But after going over all the photos again and watching a review video the gloss just wore off? Little things all started to add up, like the places you can place the wings are weird, the horn is only on the romantic head with the eyes half-closed, not as posable, etc. I'd still love to find the perfect unicorn girl sculpt one day, but Adameli isn't as perfect a fit as I thought.
      • x 1
    20. No, I did not fall out of love with my grail he was my first doll and I still have him. Ash is a Ringdoll Sol. He is still my favorite boy. I have two other Sols but Ash has something different about him. He is my Profile photo. Link works if you click on it.
      • x 1