Fighting that Doll stereotype

There are stereotypes to everything why must abjd be special and not have one? Yes there are people who have their dolls in a gothic lolita style but as we very well know that's definatly not everyone. I think why the sterotype of abjd is the gothic lolita style is because it stands out more than a abjd that is wearing street clothes. Wouldn't you agree? And we all know the truth to this matter so I don't think it's that big of an issue. It's just another sterotype like any other.

 

OT, but my sister really wants to write a paper (hell, maybe a whole book) about this property of fandom...it's all normal human behaviour, you can't find a hobby devoid of insularism, elitism, and "enemies" as it were among other hobbies. But it all seems to be just a little more prevalent in "fandom," and a little more vehement. Really interesting (and yes, kind of sad)!

 

Yeah-- just a couple weekends ago at YaoiCon, we ran into this guy who said that he was a Furry, and that he found these dolls "disturbing". MieAga looked him up and down a few times, head to toe, and then eventually said, "Hey, I'm OK, you're OK." Her kindergarten-sweetness against that look she gave him, really, it was priceless. (On the other hand, I think I muttered something bitchily Hepburnish like "Oh sugarbug, I don't where to begin picking apart everything that's wrong with that statement".)

Getting to attack somebody else automatically raises you one step in the pecking-order... So someone who's used to being on the bottom is almost more likely to hassle you than the alpha chicken. It's Jungle Law translated into Playground Law, if you will. And it doesn't go away after everyone's grown up, either.

 

I myself like to dress lolita, vk, and more of a punk style and I can say probably any "goth" people or people in the general nitch tend to like such dolls because they have a very, perfect, victorian-like quality about them that we tend to be attracted to. Vampiric, dark, flawless....things that I like, and one of the reasons why I like these dolls. They are gorgeous, and they wear beautiful clothes that I myself would wear.

But in any hobbie, anything that you do, be it politics, religon, anything....there will always be extremist who will give it a bad name. Like bad cosplayers in America....just because there are a few doesnt mean we all are bad and ect.

 

I'm totally not goth or even very much into anime...I just think bjds are pretty and I can dress them up. The few people that know about me having them think they are nifty and special. And if anyone cares how much I spend on them...it's like "hey, I paid the bills first and I could be spending this extra money on crack. dolls are better, yeah?"

 

Well, back in the day when I was in high school... *everyone prepares themselves for a 3 hour long story about the "good old days"*... I was kindof a "goth chick". I think it was pretty close to this time that my best friend was given an issue of Hautedoll by her then boyfriend, which featured a large article on Volks with lots of pictures of Isao and Jun. She was totally in love with these dolls and immediately wanted one. She showed it to me and I was less than impressed. I'm pretty sure I told her they were creepy and goofy looking. And, you know, now I have 3 of them.

So I don't see the correlation between goth and BJD's, but I think the definition of "goth" has changed greatly even since then (were we ever really sure what it was then either though? Really now). If I could have seen myself now back then though... man would I be surprised. Girly little dolls with rosy cheeks in frilly, flowery dresses are for wusses! Quick! Turn on some metal before you cross back over to the light side completely!!! *raging drum solo begins*

*looks over at Loa* Oh hey sweetheart... how long have you been sitting there??

 

Just to say quickly... I don't think the people who cosplay and think our dolls are creepy are bad... I just think it's hilarious when they walk by, dressed up to the nines as some cartoon character, and say "OMG, that doll is creepy"

It's just a very "Obviously you haven't looked in the mirror and considered how the outside world might see you" type of deal... and honestly, I think it's *very* easy to lose that kind of perspective when you're AT an anime convention! XD

No, I don't think they're bad, I just think it's interesting that they feel the need to be that way, and I think it gives you a good clue as to how difficult it will be to fight stereotypes. I certainly don't judge every cosplayer based on random statements by cosplayers walking by.
I try not to judge the cosplayers who make the statements either... there have been several instances where someone would come up and say "OMG, that doll is creepy"... and then we'd simply talk to them about the dolls... and in the end, they wanted to know more, like, where to buy one. LOL!

Like I said, I think cosplay, for the most part, is an amazing thing, and my hat is definately off to the people who work hard and put in the effort to transform into their most beloved anime characters.

 

I just got back from a trip and as I was surfing the AOL page came across Lemondrop. It's funny but as soon as I saw the heading, I just knew BJDs were going to be in there (and no surprise, it's the focus). http://www.lemondrop.com/2008/09/19/bendable-joint-dolls-and-the-creepiest-dolls-ever/

 

Well that just figures. I rarely look at that kind of junk anyways, it's all too similar to those trashmags in the grocery check out lanes. And really, their selection of pictures consist of trashed dolls for the most part. *waves hand* Quite tactless, but that's fine, let them be afraid of our dolls. The easier it is to make them run off.

As far as cosplayers and dolls go...I refuse to let any of the anime kids and Narutards at my school even so much as remotely see my boys. Whether positive or negative, there'd be some kind of reaction and they are all VERY loud. Bless their lack of shame, but damn them for their lack of volume control, sheesh!

As for this stereotype for dolls and collectors, I really don't fall into "Goth". My music can't classify me, as I listen to everything ranging from Opera, to French R&B, to Metal, and onto Pop. I dress kind of bummy for the most part unless I want to look good, but I don't look "Goth" either. My boys don't have any extravagant lolita outfits or vampire-inspired clothes. Actually, I'm looking out for Steampunk and Cyberpunk (eeee) styled outfits.

I personally think people label the dolls "Goth" because Goth is associated with creepy and thus since so many people find dolls creepy, they are obviously Goth. And lolita costumes don't help either. Nothing is wrong with the lolita style, ignorants just think that the style automatically makes the doll Goth and/or gives them permission to mock/freak out over them. It doesn't but it just goes to show that they were obviously not raised to be open-minded or at least polite, mmm?

 

JennyN - OT, but I'm surprised you didn't ask Mr Furry which one of his costumes has the holes drilled in them and where the holes are.... Ohhhh, that hobby pecking order, must it rear its strange ugly head???
Alex

 

You make a good point. For some reason, people seem to see "gothiness" as open season for teasin'. Like, you dressed like that, so take your mockery and like it. I can't tell you how many people have mocked me when I was out all "gothed up". I'm talking nice normal looking people from 30-60 years old. They look like they could be friends of my parents or something.



And there I am just walking down the street minding my own business and a guy who looks like a grandpa or my boss yells "Little early for Halloween, it's 6 months away!!! HAR HAR!" It happens so SO often, and yet I could wear something skimpy, stupid looking, or rainbow coloured and noone would say anything. If I can walk around managing to not make fun of slobs in sweatpants and sweaty t-shirts I sort of expect the same courtesy when I actually put effort into my outfit.

*sigh*

Same for dolls I guess. If people like that label it as "creepy/goth" then it allows their minds to rationalize tormenting that person and making snarky comments. People are jerks.

 

I remember something like this happening one time when I was walking with my girlfriend. We just kinda looked at each other and said, "Yeah, that's the midwest for you." But really, if they're going to say something it would be nice if it was at least new material

 

It's been happening for over a quarter of a century, and people STILL think they're being witty when they tell you "It's Not Halloween Yet". And it's not going to stop, either. There's whole lists full of good responses that you can look up & have in your arsenal. Personal favorite: "No, it's not-- so why are YOU wearing such an ugly costume?"

Yeah. I have to wonder: How would our dear departed All-American freak-expert Dr. Hunter S. Thompson have handled this situation? "Let's get down to brass tacks, babe. How much for the teddy bear?"

*snerk* No, this Furry wasn't in costume; he was one of the scantily-dressed Hired Bishonen who was serving tea. So after that surreal exchange, we just let him serve us tea and be there to look at. I figured, he's got his own problems at home.

This world is so insane that I can't believe anybody has any business calling anybody else weird, but they do. And they always will. Mostly I don't mind serving as a freak for people, & giving them something to wonder about. As long as they're not rude about it to me directly, then I don't much care. (If they're rude, then you get to break out that arsenal of fun responses & well-rehearsed zingers. ^^)

 

Well...isn't it just typical that people assume such things because they don't know enough about the hobby. If they did, they wouldn't put us into small boxes saying 'weird', 'goth' or 'psycho'. ^^

 

Since I'm just getting into BJD, I've been doing a ton of research about the hobby. I have to say, I've come across a lot of what everyone is discussing here, terms like "weird", "creepy", and "childlike".

I actually came across BJD through a thread on another page called "Top 10 Creepiest Dolls". The main picture for the article was a BJD, and she was just gorgeous, so I did the research and formulated my own oppinion.

The first time I ever saw a BJD was at the Toronto Fan Expo in 2004. I walked right up to this couple and just gushed over how wonderful the doll was. They were a little off-beat and totally treated me like an ignorant Newb, but I can understand being hostile when you've had to answer the question "what's with the doll?" all day long.

Regardless, I think it's all about being able to form your own oppinion, enjoy the things in life that make you happy, and find great people along the way to share in the same joys!

I look forward to getting to know more of you! ^_^

:~{LolaWants...}~:

 

At a meet-up a couple of weeks ago, a very timid man came up to me and politely asked if he could take a picture of the dolls. I said sure, and he asked me a couple of basic questions, still very polite. I later came across his website, where he talked about witnessing the meet-up. He wrote he hesitated asking more questions about the dolls for fear of offending us.

Offending me was the last thing he would have done had he asked about the dolls. Personally, I like it when people ask reasonable questions about it (rather than the general "what's with the dolls?" thing), and would have been GLAD to answer this guy's questions because he was so nice about it. I halfway hope he's around at the next meet-up so maybe he can get another chance to learn about the hobby.

Do you ever encourage (or try to encourage) people who seem like they're geniunely interested in the dolls/the hobby to ask you about them?

 

I just got my first doll yesterday, but for months I've been talking about getting one and getting into the hobby. Even just talking about it I got asked "Why?" When I first saw a BJD I thought it was absolutely beautiful! I am an art major (Kind of used to stupid stigmas) and to me they were just a beautiful form of art. I'm not gothic, or punk, or lolita. I'm just sort of...average. In fact I'm the complete opposite of the stereotype. I do balllet, I used to dance competetively even on my highschool dance team! I used to cheerlead even! Yes I do like anime but to me one was not related at all to the other, other than you see them occasionally at anime conventions. In fact my doll is designed after my original character, not any particular anime character. I love my family and friends though, they are completely unfazed by it all lol. They just all sort of shrug their shoulders and say "that's cool."

 

Wow,
at least he's nice enough to ask nicely
Some just keep staring and whispering

 

I just watched Doll Masters and honestly felt bad for poor Mina. And I felt really bad for Damien! What did he do to anyone? I can see how it developed a sort of stigma for dolls, although most of the killer dolls were not BJD's they were just strange life size sculptures that looked like people. But honestly Chucky managed to make dolls creepy long before this movie did.

 

Yes, yes, a million times yes. I like to think that I fight the doll stereotype by talking about the hobby and representing myself as I am - I hesitate to say normal cause it might imply that people like goths would then be abnormal. At a con with BJD displays, I talked about BJDs to anyone with questions or were vaguely interested. At a recent meet, I talked to ladies who approached me with curious questions and allowed them to take pictures of the dolls.

However, an old lady walking by did say something contemptuous towards me that would imply that I'm either delusional or childish. I suppose that's the stereotype hardest to fight. That because you play with dolls, you're a child and that you're clearly lost in a wonderland created in your own head. I replied with some sarcasm but otherwise, it's an incident I just shrug off.

The thing is...stereotypes are there for a reason. Some people will fit into the stereotypes, others won't. And if it's not horribly harmful to me, I don't particularly care how people I hardly know perceive me based on unsubtantiated stereotypes.

Nearly everyone has to fight stereotypes. Gender stereotypes, race stereotypes, geographical stereotypes... What's one more stereotype to add to it?