Fighting that Doll stereotype

I read that and all I could think of was
http://www.reallifephotos.org/wp-content/photos/2008_05/wrong.jpg
that photo.

 

But, creepy is entirely in the eye of the beholder. I find very few dolls actually creepy, and the ones that I do find creepy it's pretty obvious that their owner intended for them to be that way. They can be dressed and made up in a way that is gothy, but I see nothing about their physiology that is inherently goth. I also see huge variety among the dolls that appear on this forum and at doll meets--maybe you need to look around more?

Sadly? To whom? Why is it sad? People should own whatever dolls they like, and just because you don't like them doesn't actually make them weird, creepy or disfigured looking. I also see no point in changing a doll's look just so people outside the hobby (and by the looks of it a few in the hobby as well) won't think the owner or doll weird. This is one of those cases when it's good to stand back for a moment and get some perspective.

 

That is what i call someone with real knowledge and open mind. Thanks for this post Wolfmammy.

 

I agree with you too. This is one of the worst problems that happen where i live and they never got any perspective.

 

XKCD FTW. xD

Unfortunately, I've had that problem before, arguing before I realise 'oh crap, it's the internet.'

 

I understand the stereotypes associated with doll collecting- but it's something I'm really excited about doing so I'm not going to let that stop me. On the other hand, I'd love to be able to show off my first boy when he arrives and take him out to meet my friends, but I know they'd think I was a total freak. So I don't mention it to them and I basically don't bother explaining what they won't understand. Some of my friends would be impressed and some wouldn't. *shrug* It's just one of those things- I already don't fit the bill as 'normal' and personally I think normalcy is overrated anyway- not to mention boring. I say just don't worry about it and do what you love. I pride myself on being a unique ecclectic person with a wide variety of tastes. End of story.

 

I'm already looked at as weird. xD So I dont care. Sure, I play around and make fun of my friends who are afraid of them...so I talk to them in front of my friends and family and such.

But most stereotypes I see is that people are 'lolitas' or 'girly'. I'm very much so a tomboy, and like the Japanese rock and all that shit...but a lot of people look at my hobbies as a 'weeaboo' thing, or that I WANT to be Japanese, asian, whatever.

A hobby is a hobby. Anyone can do it, and it doesn't matter who or what you are, honestly. Just ignore them xD Or show who and what you are through your dolls or persona.

 

Circular reasoning bad! Bad!

Your personal taste does not make for facts. And shouldn't it be looking at something objectively, instead of subjectively?? If we're looking at it subjectively, there will be a wide variety of opinions that will not match up. What then will be the standard of weird? Yours?

If you go to an anime convention and you ask the people there if they think it's weird, I'm fairly sure the thousands of fans will give a resounding 'no'. So it wouldn't be weird then, would it?

Also, this constant usage of the word 'weird' gets tiresome. It's not descriptive enough or accurate.

Finally, from what you're saying and from your example pictures, you do not understand what goth actually means. Just because they dress in black and are brunette dolls does not a goth make them.

 

ahh, xkcd. There's actually a refrence to abjds...let me see if i can find it...
http://xkcd.com/122/
here it is. my boyfriend in a nutshell.
(secretly, he loves dolls, but he's afraid to admit it.)

 

Exacctlyyy........

 

I've seen only the ending of the movie, Doll Master, I didn't realize I watched short clip of that movie till I read what it was about.
The word, "weird" is used much too harshly these days, and anyone who's called, "weird" people should stay away from. I'm weird, (like the majority of DoA) but my friends already know that. My brother asked me (rudely ) if I wanted to be Japanese since I'm more interested in their culture than my Korean heritage. I said no, and was about to cuss him out, but stopped myself.

 

Yes, that's another thing. Just because I happen to be more interested in eastern culture than my own (Then again, I'm so mixed breed...), people tend to get the impression that I want to be Japanese. Which I don't. Although I'd love to visit and even stay for a while, I am a Canadian with my own heritage. I just happen to love other things.

I'm just fine being 'weird'. Heaven help me, I wouldn't want to be normal, by their definition of it. How boring! (This also applies to any other labels people slap on me, be it 'geek', 'nerd', 'furry', etc.)

 

God forbid I ever get labeled normal or boring..

At my age, I look at goth and think " Honey, we did that back in the 80's BEFORE you were born!" I don't frankly care if anyone sterotypes me, I'll soon prove them very wrong anyway. And honestly, unless you LIVE in my house or are my employer, your opinion of me isn't important.

I am pissy however that all the clothes I have found online are punk/goth/frilly etc, my boys are medieval! I need doublets, hose, boots that DONT have more metal than leather on them!

 

I think the discussions has slightly skewed off the main point.
If "you" think something is creepy, it is. Everything is in the eye of the beholder.

So if a media person thinks it weird, it is and they will play it up.

The best article about BJD's is from this month's (December) issue of Geek. Very basic, non-bias information. It is aimed at men, it seems to be a male oriented magazine. Course, women can't be geeks or nerds. [sigh]. Still its a good article and a pretty good magazine.
This is how all media outlets should report on any hobby/interest.

 

If people choose to dress a certain way, or act a certain way that is their choice, & we don't really have the right to judge, because we are not perfect.

 

LOL, yeah, I'm so tired of 25-30 year old people acting like they're all cool and different because they listen to the Cure. (I'm more like, a scant few years younger than Robert Smith and have been listening since 1981.) Sorry to go off topic but it amuses me how everybody wants to set themselves apart. Of course, I used to get ticked off when I would wear something to go out and my mom would say "I had one of those skirts back in the Big Band era."

 

Honestly, I really don't give a damn about steriotypes. So nothing changed when I got into BJDs.
I mean why should I take a stranger's ignorant nonsense over my friend's opinions.

 

whew...I just finished reading through this thread...and all I can say is that there are different kinds of "WEIRD" based on other people's perception. Even if you look normal but still different compared to others, people will still think you're weird, so it all depends on how they see you...but some people do think I'm weird and geeky in some other way...but hey! you can always ignore what they say and get on with your own life~ You don't even do them harm when you walk pass them...

 

There's some really interesting stuff being said here, both in a good and bad way. Some recent posts, in particular have me *headdesking* right now. Those have already been addressed, though, so I won't bother to add my own thoughts on them.
I will, however answer the questions posed by the OP
What is perpetuating this gothic stereotype?
This is actually a stereotype I was completely unaware of. The childish part and the dolls are creepy,so the owners are also creepy part, perhaps but not the Gothic part. I'm not quite sure where it could other than maybe because it seems to me that some people will automatically equate "weird/different/unusual" with "OMG GOTH"! Maybe that's just a way of trying to understand it or reason it away, or maybe faulty logic "This is creepy, and Goths are creepy, therefore this must be Goth."
I'm not really sure, though. I think to some people, for whatever reason Goth=bad, so that could be a bit of it. It could also have to do with the idea that a number of people enjoy dressing their dolls in what has been called "Goth" but may not necessarily be (or at least, may not necessarily be what would be considered the American/UK/European Goth look) and non-collectors get the idea that because a collector dresses their doll a certain way, that *of course* the owner must dress/act that way, too. I think I can maybe understand this, but I still think it's sort of stupid. 'S kinda like how people thinking that just because we're, for the most part, adults collecting/playing with dolls, there's something wrong/weird/creepy about us is utterly moronic. Just because *they* don't understand/like something or they happen to find it unusual doesn't *actually* make it weird to everyone else in the world and there are people who just don't get that.


Am I in the wrong hobby because I care so much that the crowd here seems overwhelmingly gothic? I don't appreciate this stereotype mainly because I hate it when people jump to conclusions about me based upon my likes.
To be perfectly honest, if you (or anyone else) is really that concerned about it, then...yeah, maybe you are. Why worry about what other people are doing or what they might think about what you are doing when you can just tell them all to shove off and continue doing what makes you happy? Personally, I don't see this stereotype being mentioned often, if at all. I sometimes see dolls which are or could be seen as Goth (and some that could maybe be called Goth if you turn you head sideways and squint XD),but the people are all different, and I've only seen a few who I'd actually call Goth. In my meetup groups, I'm generally the only one who looks gothy/punkish, so maybe it's just a matter of me having a view from the other side of this, but I've honestly never seen that particular stereotype mentioned until now.

Also, re: the media portrayal of us: ever heard of the saying "The media never lets the truth get in the way of a good story?" That applies here. The newspeople tend to think we're weird, therefore, they do their best to make what they get from interviewing us fit that idea. It wouldn't be half as interesting to make us look like normal people who happen to collect these dolls as it would to make us all look like socially awkward freaks who buy big expensive toys and treat them like our children/lovers and who don't quite have a grip on reality. Really, what's likely to get better ratings, a story on, say, a bank manager who collects these customisable dolls from Asia or a story about some girl who wears weird poofy, frilly dresses and carries around "freaky Asian goth dolls"?

I'm actually more annoyed by the BJD=sexdoll, BJD=voodoo doll, and BJD=satanic object (O_o?) ideas people seem to have, but that's just me. And I'd like to add my name to the ranks of people paralysed with not caring about what others think one way or the other. People already think I'm a freak, so what's one more "weird" hobby more or less? Frankly, I have more important things to be concerned with.

 

Just have to raise my hand here as a lolita who has a creepy, gothy, semi-voodoo BJD. And loves him all the same.

Sometimes the stereotype is right!

And some of us just really are "weird!" rofl ^^

It's true that not all of us are "that" kind of weird though! Weird is just a label that people who don't have their own personality use. I remember when I first got my BJD I took him out with me wandering around, to a friends dorm, out drinking and back again. And man did I get some stares! And lots of "your doll is looking at me..." I want to say "your boring outfit is looking at him, and he's wondering what's up."

hehehehehehehehe.