Fighting that Doll stereotype

The word doll comes from a corruption of the proper name "Dorathea", itself, a reworking of the Greek "Theadora", (doron, gift + theos, god). "Dolly" was a nickname circa 1700 - it reflected an l/r transference which makes sense given the pronunciation of the time and place. "Doll(y)" never meant a child's plaything but that it also meant a sexually compromised (poor/selling) woman. It never stood alone, as an innocent word.
Those of us who are women, or who were ever compromised sexually or on the basis of gender (isn't that all of us?) can hold "dolls" out as coats of arms against sexual exploitation. To be a "doll" is to have that function built into the etymolgy of your title.
My daughter's doll is, on one level, a physical symbol of everything that I will not stand for, on her behalf.
She is also a symbol of all the freedom that I wish for her.

 

*cough* See, the only stereotype that I was aware of when it came to dolls was the "don't touch or I'll cut your hand off", never take it outside, only display it on the shelf-deal. I've committed a multitude of dolly sins if that's what the typical BJD owner is supposed to be like.

I noticed a lot more groups than just the gothic hordes at Dollectable though, so maybe some folks just aren't meeting a good cross-section of the hobby, methinks.

 

I'm coming into this late, but I have to comment that I would be glad to be considered goth or lolita (I'm obviously not though) instead of what I normally get! Ever since I got into Blythe my sister has been telling me "Oh I saw the prettiest victorian doll for only $25! at the mall" or whatever and I have to explain once again that is not the type of doll I'm interested in. So that's with Blythe who is basically a fashion doll like Barbie...She can't understand BJD at ALL. haha I am so sick of being equated with someone who collects a bajillion baby dolls or Franklin Mint type dolls and has them gathering dust all over their house. Maybe it's the elitist in me, but I think these dolls are way better made, more interesting and if I have any that sit around and gather dust it means they need to find a new owner who will enjoy them more! No one I know outside of the doll world has much of an idea what goth, lolita, ABJD or art dolls even are.

I wish there was a way to explain my attraction to the "kawaii noir" feeling of some BJD too. I love that about some EGL and goth dolls. For instance the dolls in the videos that Nollyn liked too...I love the "feel" of that beauty with the dark overtones...Does anyone know what I mean? I can't seem to describe it well enough to discuss it :P

Currently I'm trying to find common ground with a co-worker who just got into picking up the inexpensive "porcelian" type dolls at thrift stores. It's kind of difficult because she just buys them to display them and isn't interested in changing their clothes/wigs etc. I'd love to get one of these cheapies, make a new dress for it and give it a faceup to see what she'd think...

 

Klinkekula - That guys a total idiot. I actually laughed at his comments, mainly that his source of information was "Wikipedia". And I laughed hard. I'm actually still giggling.

Straight from Wiki itself:
Most of the articles can be edited by anyone with access to the Internet, simply by clicking the edit this page link. Anyone is welcome to add information, cross-references or citations, as long as they do so within Wikipedia's editing policies and to an appropriate standard.

Any idiot with a computer can add to wikipedia. I could say that glaciers are a breed of dog from Ethiopia if I wanted to. There's a reason that Wikipedia is not a valid source. Tell this genius that he should get his facts straight and advise him not to breed. There's enough stupid in the world. Also, make sure to give him a thanks from me. I think I just added a good ten years to my life from all that laughing! *gigglesnort*

 

That is SO true! I was laughing of him myself. And to tell you the truth; he's the most pathetic person I know. And he sees himself as a god, "hitler" (he actually is a fan of him) and a know-it-all. I'm just waiting for him to see what a pathetic jerk he is, and having a little fun on the way. Hehee~

I actually showed him the new E.I.D body that Iplehouse is releasing soon, and there were something wrong with that too, so I give up. :P That's about the most masculine BJD-body I've seen. EVER!

-

But I've gotten the whole "gothic" thing off of everyone I know that knows I'm collecting these dolls. They don't know anyone else, so I'm just another weirdo. That I don't mind being, as long as they don't judge me without knowing me. Maybe it's a tiny bit easier to live in a country/place where about noone else knows about these dollies? I don't know.. ^^;

 

This is a good thread!
Here's a stereotype which I've experienced once.
Since I'm a forever single (I don't believe in marriage), introverted, independent, kid hating, sculptor who lives alone in her apartment. I've been stereotyped as "the sad, lonely woman who craves a boyfriend". When I hear this from people it really pisses me off

Don't get me wrong, the type of kids I hate are the ones who are spoiled with no respect, and I do have a small circle of friends but most of the time I like my loneliness and silent spaces.
I love my independence and don't want to be chained down to some idiot man.
But then again the people who think this of me as sad are sad humans themselves who can't live without a boyfriend/girlfriend even if the spouse is a bum or worst..an abuser.

 

Well let's see how many stereotype buttons can I push? I'm...
over 40
single
childless (& uninterested in having them for the most part)
overweight
cat-owner
don't leave the house much
very few friends
been called sexually perverse by some "normal" people
goth (more or less)

Did I forget any? So I guess I'm one of the doll owners who keep giving everyone else a bad name huh?

Morgan

 

So it's YOU!! *points accusing finger* You're ruining things for the rest of us! XD

I fit most of those, except for the goth category and that's because I'm too lazy to keep up any one look!

 

Yep it's just little ole me causing ALL the problems. *SNERK*
Other than 97% of my closet being black, I'm more goth in attitude & interests than in clothing style.

Morgan

 

*waves hand in the air from the slightly lit back row*

Here, Here!!!

 

Geez... I have no cats and I've still got a couple years to go before 40 (ticktockticktock) and I'm still skinny (ditto), but I can't help the feeling that some people think I look a lo~ot different. Nobody is ever surprised to find out that I have no kids, though. *snort*

Wait. For real? Ohhh... one of THEM. He is a total stereotype himself! One of those textbook "I'm so edgy because I think Hitler was cool" guys, who somehow seems to be an expert on all topics, even to the point of making things up completely just so he can sound like he's right? Probably keeps those anime-nurses-with-guns figurines on his desk? Yeah, those. Loser. La-HOO-za-HERR.

I would say it's MOST easy to live in a place that's freak-friendly. I'm happy to live here in San Francisco, and would have a hard time leaving unless it was to go back to New York. Would possibly consider Key West if I won the lottery. Anyplace that prides itself on the eccentricity or diversity of its people... when you're in a place where anything can happen & often does, they hardly blink at you for carrying a giant doll in public. Or wearing your best pair of purple glitter bat-wings to the store. Or singing in the middle of the street. Etcetera.

My neighbor and I took a few big tan boy dolls into the gay strip club down the street (it was a sort of photo walking-tour), and the cashier guys were only alarmed for a minute-- one of them thought it was some super race of marionettes. The others just quipped, "Hey, are those guys underaged?" and "Oh look, three more contestants for Amateur Night!" Heavy weirdness is taken in stride around here.

PS: Bloodredroses1, we will be contacting you individually regarding financial restitution for all the damage you've caused. XD

 

That statement made me giggle. I'm going to have to introduce Saif as a super race of marionettes to someone....



On account that I wear enough camo to disappear into a non-existent forest, >_> I don't think I look much like a doll person... and now that my hair is super short and my favorite pair of shorts came from the little boy's section of Macy's... I can't help it, boys get bigger pockets... *likes to shove everything and the kitchen sink into her pockets*

But I've not carried Saif out in public yet... I'm never sure how to deal with people who say stuff about it. I'm really quick to get angry, but I generally don't want to waste energy fighting... Just leaves everyone with a bad feeling and idiots shouldn't have the power to ruin my day.

 

I think I knock the stereotype out of the water, and it's good to see other people doing the same We're not all chubby social reprobates!

 

Yeah sometimes it's just nice to know you're not alone isn't it?

Sorry but I have back taxes I have to pay first! Besides I don't think there's that much money in the world.

Morgan

 

The new NPR report on BJDs may make this a great topic to start discussing again.

 

I recently encountered this (that collecting ABJD makes me a "certain kind of person") for the first time, at my place of employment. You see, I work in security. We have lockers. We're allowed to decorate our lockers however we want (some people have pictures of cows on theirs - one has superheroes on his). I decided to put a few pictures of my dolls on mine, and some quotes (things like "Diplomacy is the art of letting someone have your way," and "We all have ability, the difference is how we use it"). The next day I came in to work, and someone (I know who, but whatever) had written "Proud Emo" under my name on the front of my locker, in pen.

WTF? I'm sorry, but I'm one of the least potentially "emo" people I know. I used to teach self defense, I love military (REAL military, not "military-inspired") gear, I don't wear makeup (don't know how to put it on, actually), don't own or wear spiked or studded anything, I'm not weepy or mopey or...just...I'm not even sure how to describe the idea of being "emo," but it sure as HELL doesn't apply to me. I mean, the dolls in the photos were almost all holding weapons. Pistols, swords, knives - even an M16! I'm a writer, but no one who has ever read what I write would call any of it "emo." I believe the word most often used to describe my writing is "gritty." I have written exactly five poems in my entire life, and none of them were dark or emo or whatever you want to call it. If they'd written anything from "Freak" to "Coldhearted B*tch" it would have been more appropriate than "Proud Emo."

I was admittedly livid. (So was my boss, when he saw it.) I mean I was seriously pissed off. The kind of pissed off that can result in black eyes and broken noses and slashed tires. However, did I express this? No. I smiled, laughed about it, and then taped a piece of white paper over the top so it wasn't visible anymore.

I don't get depressed. I get angry. And I don't generally let it show. This is emo?

 

Isn't "proud" and "emo" together an oxy-moron of some sort? From what I gather from the mysterious mysteries of slang, emos are miserable people who hate life and the light of day, but like telling everyone else that they are miserable for mostly trivial teenage reasons.

My sister gets called "Happy Emo" at school which means god-only-knows what... and it's not like she dyed her hair black... we're Chinese! ...and my sister is really tanned... (I'm the attemptedly vampire one... and I'm the one who actually had a Goth phase... though it was more "profuse amounts of black")

I have a feeling my sister is doesn't want to get into BJDs because she worries way too much about what people think of her. I know she likes playing with Saif. Oh well, I'm sure my parents are happy if she just plays with mine instead of getting her own.

 

I haven't told many people about my love for BJDs. I've told my boyfriend and my friends I've known for years, but...
The friends I haven't known that long OR my video gaming guy pals? Yeah, that's just asking for trouble. They all go to Cons and some have run into people who make BJD collectors look bad. I wish it wasn't the case, but sadly it is. I hope that one day I can tell them without getting stereotyped as 'some emo freak with a doll' and 'who spends tons of money on some doll just to feel better than everyone else'

 

Its sad to see people out there who judge others really by what they collect...well... overall yes, it kind of does say what kind of person you are.... but, if someone were to see me with Nabiki or Zero(cant wait to get him!! ) then they would think id be crazy to spend that much on them...or even anime which in fact would be more than my dolls and their accessories. Back to my point, even when people know id rather watch Japanese animation rather than real people shows they think im a kid and same with the dolls, since most people associate kids playing with them.

But what are you going to do, there are stereotypes everywhere... Americans, Canadians, different races and people from countries etc. But, theres no use to get mad, all we gotta do is ignore them or show them how great our BJDs (and other things you collect or a hobby) are....

 

I think that it is mainly the fact that these dolls require so much money, and attention. Well, they don't need you to constantly look after them, but essentially nobody would buy a BJD to put it in a cupboard forever.

This results in an image of somebody who devotes their time to what is, in the end, and inanimate object, and many people think that the only reason a person would do that is if they had nothing else to do, and no friends. They think that if you're pouring your heart into a doll, you are unable to fit into normal society, and talk with real people.

Stupid, but people seem to believe it.