Have you ever had a doll you really loved, only for something bad to happen, and you find you now have negative feelings for him or her? Maybe to the extent that you put him or her away and couldn't even look at them, or even sell them? Did you ever overcome those feelings and how? For example, I was totally overwhelmed with love for my doll and he brought me total unadulterated joy. But then, through him I met some people who I'd really rather not have met, and now sometimes when I look at him I think of my bad experiences with these people and it saddens me, because this thing that once made me entirely happy is now making me a little bit sad. And it angers me, to think I could be put off my beautiful doll because of one tiny thing like that, but I'm getting over it as time goes by. So, has this ever happened to you? And how did you feel? I hope that makes sense O.o I looked for other threads about being put-off your dolls, but all I could find were things about being put off the hobby in general and I wanted to focus specifically on dolls you own ^^
No. I don't interact with anyone face to face that knows I collect dolls, except my significant other who's supportive. I don't meet people in the doll community either. I don't know what your situation is, but I hope you can bond with your doll again.
I didn`t experience anything like you described. But I know that some girls sell their dolls, given to them by boy-friends, after the couple splits. The girls don`t want to keep these dolls any more, as they give them bad memories.
I've had something similar happen and I'm sad and feel it's a disgrace I ever gave those people my trust and friendship. They certainly never deserved it, but you never know those things in advance. As much as I despise what happened, I tried to erase as much as possible that tied my doll to those people. In the end I really like that doll and I wouldn't want to miss it. A doll is an object and it can't be at fault, so it's really what you make of it. It did happen a few times that I got frustrated with a doll. It didn't want to pose, it didn't look good in anything, face-ups that ended up ruined, etc. Sometimes it made me feel like simply selling the doll and be done with it as it became harder and harder to actually like the doll, but I buy all my dolls because I like them and their potential. I take a break and try again later before giving up. That has worked in almost all cases.
I've had something similar happen to me as well. It was a while back when I only had one, but one of my "used-to-be" friends used to be really rough on Hikaru--like spontaneously grabbing him from my desk by his arm or leg and just throwing him down anywhere when something else grabs her attention--and I really didn't like it. Expensive doll or not, I can't stand people who can't give at least a little respect for ANY of my things. For some reason she and my other friends at the time claimed that because we were friends, that gives her the authority to treat my things as she sees fit. Yeah. The friendship didn't last much longer after that. Not the greatest memories to be associated with my doll but it never severely affected my love for the hobby. It's more of the fact that she was unwilling to compromise and respect my feelings that ended the friendship, so I can't put the doll entirely at fault.
By far the best thing you can do is go out and make some new memories with your dolly! Then you will think of those things, not the bad things. I've had ups and downs with Allan, I think the more I pay attention to him, the more it happens (cause I get stressed out by the imperfections).. so it's good for me to take some breaks. Then when I see him again I think he's the cutest thing!
that's a very good idea E.Hadrian! I think that applies very well to life, as well as dolls. Get back on the horse, as they say
I went through this for months with my Megi-2 Adam. He took a very nasty fall and his face got messed up bad to the point it would take either major reconstruction or just having to buy a whole new head cause the nose is bad, but that wasn't all that happened in the fall. His fingers snapped off (now super glued back on), back of his hand is chipped, his knees are chipped, his one shoulder, and the whole arm shows some kind of damage. I was very upset and it's at the point I avoid bringing him out if I can because I don't want any bad comments or explained what happened cause it was my bad he took that fall. Now I've gotten over it for the most part and I do rather good at hiding his marks minus his hand with broken fingers. The bigger the event the more I worry about comments, but he's all the more special for me. Adam is not supposed to be perfect and now he's not so it's alright. Besides Rhiannon (my Shoyo) loves him all the more ^^
Sometimes, it is not even a doll related incident, but the timing of a life incident that throws you off. A dear friend of mine died just after I received my first boy doll. He had been willing to talk about dolls because they were important to me and gradually had come to admire their artistry. After his death, it seemed disrespectful to want to play with Mstya instead of simply greiving. I worked through my conflicted feelings by making Mstya part of my greiving and healing process. Mircea is in honor of my friend and many of Mstya's likes and interests come from his memory.
This seems to happen to me a lot... >.>;; I loved my technically-first doll (an Obitsu) and really enjoyed taking her out, planning her outfits, and taking her around town to take pictures of her. Unfortunately, she's a couple years old, and had been played with a lot by me and her previous owner (my girlfriend), and a major joint in her body ended up breaking. I don't blame anyone for this, but it made me sad to not be able to play with her as much, 'cause she couldn't stand, sit up, or do anything without a prop or nearly half and hour of carefully posing her. My first boy, I instantly fell in love with. From the moment I saw him, to the moment I first held him, it was dolly love. Then his sueding fell off (or was peeled off, or washed off) and he just didn't pose like he used to. And by that, I mean his chest joint would pop out, he'd fall over, his balance was all screwy... Dressing him turned into a nightmare, posing him just pissed me off 'cause he wouldn't stay... I didn't even want to look at him anymore for the longest time. Then I re-sueded his joints, and I love him again. ^.^ Then, of course, my Heliot head... He took a couple of spills (one my fault, on the cat's), and he's damaged now. His ear tip chipped off, and his nose has a crack in it. I know I can fix him, but it's aggravating to have to do so when I hadn't even had him for three months.
I can't say I've ever really been put off of any of my crew, but after walking away from a particular friendship last summer I did have to step back and take some time to sort-of reassess and reconnect with a couple of them. One in particular had almost gotten to the point of being more the other person's character than he was my own... Over the years that her world and mine were connected, he'd strayed a long, long way from his original concept, and it took quite awhile for me to go back and sort-of mentally rebuild him from the ground up without those alterations. If I hadn't had such a strong affection for the character and his resin avatar to begin with, I can pretty easily imagine how that process might have ended with me just saying to hell with it and selling Jen to start over.
I think my head would explode if I let little things get to me such as others saying mean things about my dolls.
Aww I know this feeling well. It has happened to me with other things, but not my BJDs They are fairly personal to me though, so I don't think anyone else could ruin them for me (yay!)
It sort of happened to me. It was a combination of having some subtle and some far less subtle insults about one of my dolls. It may sound a little horrible that someone else's negative opinion about how my doll looked effected my feelings for her but I think it may have been because it was touching on my own feelings that I hadn't gotten her to her right look yet. I did end up re-doing her look with a completely different wig and new style of clothes and that seemed to do the trick. I feel much better towards her now and much more at ease about anyone else's opinions about her.
I had a really bad fight with one of my best friends, and my doll Antigone was supposed to be the twin of her doll, Hana. I ended up selling Antigone because I felt so bad about the whole thing, and every time I looked at Antigone I would remember our fight. Everything turned out okay in the end, though, because we made up and now we're good friends again ^^ I still don't regret selling Antigone -- I don't like to have reminders of conflict, especially one that was so heartbreaking at the time. If I ever get a MNF Shushu again, I'd be a totally different type of character than before. :3
My Migidoll Miho Takeshi was a character of mine from a long running roleplay i had with my best friend. He was married to One of her characters, and their children where co-controlled, unfortunately after graduating highschool My best friend decided that she would rather not associate with me any longer (or at least not for the next several years. I've heard conflicting things, none of them from her directly) and i was devistated. Every time I look at Takeshi I think of the last words she said to me "I'll call you tomorrow" and how many tomorrows have come and gone with not a single word, and I want to cry. sometimes I did. Although I love Takeshi's character immensely and it pains me to let him go, Its just not a good time for him to be here, and it would pain me more to leave him in a box. Not to say I've let this friend ruin things for me. But because of the idea of putting our characters into resin I had ripped my focus from the storyline that was ALL my own, which is where my priorities lie now. In the meantime I have to go through and re-work my characters from that roleplay back into mine alone (as they started out) and maybe one day they will return to me in dolly form.
I personally have not had that happen but I've heard alot of people say that is has... I'm thankful AND hopeful that it won't ever happen, but I know in myself it's a possibility. Even if you look on this very forum, it's so heartbreaking the tales people tell about loosing the love of something they once cherished because of a bad incident. Really, when I can't let something go. I feel it's because I never got the chance to 'justify' myself or the reason why I felt this way. If I feel I've been mistreated, I can't it off my mind until I've paid myself the 'respect' of knowing I did something about it. Otherwise, it won't rest. I feel that, if I was screwed over by a company for instance, and I bought the doll from there, I don't think I'd be comfortable with it until I knew the whole story as to 'why' this went so badly. And sometimes just knowing you're not alone in the matter will give a since of 'belonging' when otherwise you felt pretty out of place. It's comforting to some. ^^
Not with dolls, no.. but I can understand it though. >A< Recently I met this girl, was friends with her for a short time, but we ended up becoming huuuge enemies. The thing is, she has the same name as my absolute favorite stuffed animal from childhood who still sleeps on the pillow next to me, and that bothered me a for a little while. But when bad experiences get attached to an object (or name, or place, etc..) you just have to make it your own again. Replace the bad experiences and thoughts with new and good ones.
Yeah, I have had the experience. Thankfully it wasn't one that lasted. I have this experience with various things, actually, not just dolls. :/ It's a terrible one and I have sympathy for you over it!
