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Having trouble bonding with Doll?

Jun 3, 2012

    1. I have my first doll ordered a MNF shushu. I don't know whether I'm suffering from burnout and are just sick of looking at photos but I feel like she's all wrong somehow. I'm having trouble bonding with her. What do to when you aren't bonding with your doll. I don't have her yet (which could be part of the problem).
       
    2. I'd suggest waiting for her to arrive first. :)
      There can be a lot of time between order date and arrival and feelings change. Even though looking at the photos might bore you, holding your personal doll in your arms for the first time can work wonders with bonding!
       
    3. Well, maybe it's the way it's worded(or my brain's just not working), but I'm little confused. Do you already have her with you, or did you JUST purchase her?

      Because if you just bought her, then you probably won't know for sure if you'll bond with her until she actually arrives. Sometimes the dolls are much better in person(I don't have a doll yet either, so I kind of understand the worry).

      If you already have her, I would give her another chance. Everybody bonds with their dolls differently and you might not feel a very strong bond with her right away. Sometimes it takes time. Some people feel a bond right away, other people bond by customizing their face-ups and doing general dolly maintenance.
      I personally would give it a month or two at least. And then, if you're still having bonding issues, it would probably be best to sell her to someone who would get more enjoyment out of her.
      You'll find the right dolly for you if you just keep looking. :D
       
    4. You don't have your doll yet. Wait until you have it and see how you feel. Remember that these dolls are customizable so if you end up not liking something, you can change it. You can give it a different face up, different eyes, different wig, etc.
       
    5. I have a mnf shushu too, and as every suggest wait for her to arrive! ^^
      I actually felt that similar mix feeling you had. I wasn't sure if she was right for me or not either. But after she arrived, I love her! I think my box opening thread on DoA is a good evidence of how much I love her:lol:

      Try not to look at other people's shushu photo because you probably won't like it as much since they're not yours. When she arrive, customize her, and take her picture yourself!

      Make her your shushu!
       
    6. I think i was going through this also. Im wating on my doll to. I think hes half way here *fingers crossed* Couple of weeks after i ordered him i started looking at other dolls and it made me think have i dont the right thing in buying this doll? After looking at some pictures of him though i know i have. And i cant really make up my mind if i have or not untill i really get him. I guess if you dont end up bonding with your doll you could put him/her up for adoption.:(
       
    7. Buyers Remorse seems to be common with BJD's and given this is your first purchase, I do not think it is surprising whatsoever for you to feel this way beforehand, particularly if you spent a long time choosing your sculpt. Do not worry, as everyone else suggested, it is entirely different having a doll in your hands than looking at and critiquing a bunch of photos. Sometimes it is exactly the reverse. You will eagerly anticipate an arrival and it just does not live up to the hype you have built around it. I've had openings where I have been less than 100% thrilled, but for me, it always comes down to playing and working with them and discovering their uniqueness and then the bonding and appreciating them for exactly that. A good example are my recent purchase of 2 Realpuki. They are somewhat like lunchbag letdown due to their incredible tininess and it wasn't until I picked up my camera and started photographing the little imps in different environments where I connected and felt the joy of having them. Then I marveled over their littleness and their tiny little joints and their flexibility and the simplicity of posing them.. Hope this helps :) I predict you will be like a kid at Christmas because you are having the doubts ahead of time and burning yourself out on other people's photos. Best Wishes!
       
    8. You could also try disengaging yourself from the purchase. Do something else in a different hobby, or concentrate on something else you have going on in your life. Sometimes I find that I get worked up "over nothing" because I attach too much importance to the doll and/or to the purchase. And, time will go a little faster because you're thinking about something else. Suspense breeds a lot of doubt too.
       
    9. First of all... don't worry too much about it while you're waiting. Once the doll actually arrives, you'll be able to make a much more informed choice about rather or not you like her. Until then, you're just guessing, no matter how many pictures you look at.

      Secondly... not everyone does the "bonding" thing, so don't worry about that either. It's not in any way a requirement for owning or enjoying these dolls, no matter how often people on DoA may talk about it. You may find out that dolls simply fall into the "very cool toys" catagory for you rather than being little resin BFFs.... and there's NOTHING wrong with that. There are plenty of us around who reserve our bonds for more animate companions, and still have a heck of a lot of fun with our dolls, too. :lol:
       
    10. Wait until you get her. For all you know, you're going to open that box and bond with her instantly.
       
    11. I worried about the same thing with my second boy (MiniFee Ruth). I loved my first but found myself worrying that I wouldn't feel the same about my second. As soon as he arrived and out of the box I was instantly bonded to him.
      All I can say is wait and see. It could just be that you're worrying because it was a rather large purchase. Like everyone's been saying, wait till you have the doll in your hands. It can change everything. ^_^
       
    12. I ordered my baby five months ago, and am STILL waiting for him. Now I fell in love with him on first sight and I KNEW he was the one I wanted {To turn into my baby sato XD} Issue is, I then started looking at all these other dolls on the market and these cheaper dolls and second hand dolls and then I realized, I could have bought one of these and then made them into my sato and I believe MAYBE I might have come into your line of thinking where I regreted at certain parts buying him....but I'm telling you right now, to this very day, five months later and still most likely another 15 weeks till I get him....I know the moment I open that box he's going to be the one. {He's also my first doll} No matter how many times I think that I might have been to hasty and no matter how many times I might start to think I chose the wrong one....I swear on that day when I finally get him, he's going to be perfect.

      Now that's just me. But if you chose her as your first pick for a doll, I mean she's not cheap so it's not like you choose her from an acution or market cause she was there cheap. And you say you're sick maybe of just looking at her photo's? But I mean the best thing about BJD is that you can do practically anything with them! You can shape them into who you want them to be. So maybe you're just sick of the way they have her, cause it's not the "her" you see? But when you get her you can turn her into your own precious little girl in your eyes. Once again just my two sense. Or maybe, when you get her you really won't enjoy her, maybe you still won't bond with her, then maybe you can find a good trade or something? I'm not sure, as I said I just couldn't skip over this and wanted to give my own two cents on the matter. My apologises if you dislike or disagree with any of my statement ^^.
       
    13. La. My advice is to stop looking at pictures. If you look at the same picture every day, of course you'll get sick of seeing the picture. So stop looking at pictures and start thinking about your doll and what you plan to do with it. Look at clothes or wigs or eyes instead.