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"Its a doll, its not a real person."

Nov 27, 2009

    1. ^Agreed. Someone else finding something that you do strange doesn't make it wrong, and you shouldn't let it get to you. People generally enjoy attacking things they find confusing or scary, heh. I've had mostly good luck with supportive friends, but you get the occasional visitor who's absolutely flabbergasted as to why I have such "creepy" dolls.

      My friend brought his boyfriend over once, for instance, who practically ran straight for my room, started picking things up off my shelves, and expecting that I explain them to him. When he reached the dolls, I knew I'd have trouble. It ended with being insulted after a lengthy, detailed explanation by this same person who had demanded I explain BJDs in the first place.

      That being said, those kinds of situations used to annoy me to no end, and even make me feel embarrassed about my love of dolls for a brief moment. That phase didn't last long, though. I realized that it was best to leave non-doll people out of the doll world, basically. I can't force someone to understand where I'm coming from with my hobbies and interests, so I don't try.

      People that can't be accepting of you and your differences shouldn't be given any of your time anyway.;)
       
    2. I've never had anyone tell me anything along the lines of, "It's a doll, not a real person," but for those who have had that said to them, it's almost insulting to the intelligence. It's like, honestly, do you really think that I think they're living beings?

      I would think that if you're good friends with someone, the quirks would be accepted.
       
    3. I think that if you own your doll long enough, and if it comes to a point. I'm sorry, I have every right to make sure that I talk to them. I am about to own my first doll, and I am sure I am going to be talking all the time to her. And I will feel that she is real, and a part of my family even if she is just a doll. But at one point or another I'm sure that we all talk to our dolls, or refer to them as real people.
       
    4. Well it may not be alive/living person/animal...
      But that doesn't mean it doesn't have spirit!
      'Kinda like grandma! R.I.P


      ((Lol sorry couldn't resist.
      I can't help but feel that 'souls' can occupy places or things on a whim.
      (Plant life, possibly food, areas, things, etc.)
      So yah. My dolls are not living breathing beings but I still consider them to be alive spiritually-to some degree... depending on the circumstances. Some dolls may be hollow, empty vacant soulless objects. Some may not be. Depends. That's just me. Ignore this ghost txt lol!!!))
       
    5. My BF once got shocked about my reaction about how he treated my dolls (holding him up at one leg, causing him to fall backwards). He also told me it was just an object and not something that lives etx.

      I never really considered them as living objects containing a soul or such, but I do like people to show some respect for my (and other ppls) stuff. This also means holding an expensive doll properly, instead of almost dropping it ...

      They do have personalities, even though they aren't that detailed yet. I suppose they all are a part of me, a specific twitch enlarged xD So somehow talking bad about them feels a bit like talking bad about me ... Guess that explains the emotional bond a bit ^^

      I might not see the doll as a real person, but I think I can say that about the personalities, who actually all live a bit inside me ^^
       
    6. I don't have a doll yet, but I doubt anyone will ever say this to me. I can't imagine treating a doll, or even a character (which I have more experience with) so much like a real person that people will feel the need to say that. :P I certainly wouldn't take offense, even if they did. It's like, "LOL, no shit."

      Sorry if this post sounds a little irritated. I've had a couple of serious, personal experiences with people unable to separate fiction from reality. Long story short: I was roleplaying a guy, my friend was roleplaying a girl, our characters started dating, my friend's boyfriend called me IN TEARS and told me to back off from his girlfriend. Then his girlfriend professed her love to me. IN REAL LIFE (I'm a GIRL). Then they had a turbulent breakup.

      SIGH. I really, REALLY hate it when people get too into their hobbies.
       
    7. That's so sweet! <3 I wish everyone treated the dolls like that.
      My dolls at least really are a part of my family, I know they aren't "real people" but they add a lot to the joy in my life. I think that's what matters.
      Usually if I get a bad reaction to them, I just stare at whoever said it and then make them feel more awkward. lol!
       
    8. If someone can't accept you as you are, should they even be your friend is the real question!
      No one likes a friend who makes them feel bad about themselves just because they have an odd hobby.
      The way I see it, if you talk to your pets like they can understand, whats the difference in talking to your dolls? ( other than pets can breathe....etc.)
       
    9. Exactly.
      Now, I've always spoken to inanimate objects as if they live. My car for instance. I've been know to frequently tell my car "Go, baby, go! Just a mile or so~!" Just like I scold Virginia when she throws her wig.
       
    10. My mother, about an hour ago in fact, asked me ''In boi's they say they like to doodle?''
      ''Do they really doodle? ''???'' ''Do they think they are aalliivvee?''
      Me: ''Um...'' and just left the question.
      We all know they don't move by themselves but...
      We all know they are just dolls, not people, but that dose not mean you can just say there just dolls, its just like stuffed animals , children play with them like they are real?
      I personaly think dolls have souls (I am not crazy nor ever been) not in the sense coming to life souls but souls created by us
      And people don't understand unless they have one
      =3
       
    11. I've found myself actually having to say this. I had one guy convinced I was dating my doll. Said guy attempted to "bring me into reality" and suggested I try to talk to a "real man" Apparently it flew right over his head when I jokingly said I liked these boys better since they were pretty, bent to my will and don't talk :P So I told him once I see a real man I'll let him know.

      Then the guy was wondering why I stared and backed away like he was insane. I repeatedly tried to tell him I was fully aware I was carrying a large doll. Then again the guy harrassed me all night to dance with my doll and take him home and that he'd call me in the morning.... But it again flew over his head when I said only if you hand me your wallet and car.
       
    12. I don't have her yet... but I can speak from having other things....dolls/ plushies/ things I've made.

      I give them personalities, I take photos of them, I create stories.
      They are dolls, yes.
      They are resin and paint, yes.
      They are not alive.
      But *I* make them alive. I imagine and live and breathe so that is what is channeled. If I no longer existed, they would once again, just be a hunk of material.

      I refer to them by names that I gave them. I see this as a sign of ownership. (If my doll/toy/what have you was sold to someone else, they would be given another name, no?) I treat them with respect (I mean they did cost a TON. And if it's just some mangy plushie, most likely it is worth a million dollars to me.) I'd hate to see them be damaged or hurt... even minimally. They have their own stories and act as my muses. (I just can't seem to grow out of that childish need for fantasy and pretend.)

      But at the end of the day, they're just toys. I don't have a problem leaving them home alone for hours or days. But you betcha that if I start thinking about them and can't remember if I put them safe or can't seem to remember where I left them that I'll worry. (My like my precious plushie when I was a kid.) I don't take them out with me to school or social activities etc. ...why take the chance of damage. Dolls and plushies are toys for home, if I'm somewhere else, I should be focusing on that: Schoolwork, friends, errands, work. When I'm home with them, I'll play with them, sit with them, take photos of them, but not so much talk to them. Their speaking comes out in photo stories and writings.

      But realistically, 9 out of 10 people don't get it. Too many people want to be all grown up and they think that means leaving your childhood entirely behind. Or they think their hobbies are the only TRUE hobbies. I don't want to deal with the confusion or disgust, and they don't want to see it. I love what I love. I don't need to flaunt it. (And It's not my fault people lack imagination.)

      Of course this is how I treat them, I know some people who treat them as a living breathing thinking thing, and others who treat them like pretty investments. I don't mind being somewhere in the middle. :)
       
    13. Well call me crazy, but I talk to my dolls all the time like I do my patients in the nursing home. And when hubby hears me talking up a storm upstairs with my Narae Tisa or Chen named Kyo, he knows I'm still human and leaves it at that.
       
    14. Its like owning a person. You give them personalities and take pictures of them and so on and so forth so its hard not to think of them as alive. We all know that they really aren't and who really cares what non-doll people think.
       
    15. I understand your reaction to your friend completely. I have gotten nothing but mean and hurtful comments from my own family about my doll and understand that comments like that can sting regardless weather or not you think your doll is a "real" person or not. Things like this happen with any hobby.
       
    16. I find it ironic that mainstream culture practically trains kids to respond to cloth-covered humanoid and animaloid figures as if they were real people. Toys, commercials, theme parks, cartoons, so many other things and ways drilling the concept and the habit into little minds. But then you're supposed to just "grow up" and forget all about that, and make your conceptual world full of nothing but things as dead as rocks (except for taking your turn to push the habit onto the next generation -- without getting personally involved or responsive, of course). But it's ok to lapse, as long as the personnified object has no human resemblence -- you can talk to your car, attribute personality and intent to your machinery and appliances.

      I figure at least a doll looks like it's listening to you!
       
    17. Hey, don't let it get you down. My twenty-one year old friend calls her dolls her children! And she is very mature, and sweet, and lovable. Since I was twelve my father has teased me for still loving and collecting dolls "You're still buying those silly things?" "Oh, go on in and buy your DOLLY then." I didn't let his comments sway me though. I know I'm not immature for loving dolls. When I was in my American Girl doll phase, they were my children, and before I went to school in the morning I would take them out of bed, put them in school clothes, and sit them in a little doll schoolroom I had. And every night I would put them in their pajamas and tuck them in night night. Some people think that just because something you have isn't animated, it cannot be your friend, which is simply not true. My first American Girl doll is my friend, my baby blanket is my friend, the trees and the sunset are my friends. And, when I get my BJD, she will be a close friend too. I plan to take her with me home on the weekends, on trips, and over to my friends' houses. I am not ashamed of my love of dolls or my feelings for them. People really need to be more accepting and stop labeling/stereotyping people because they like something different.
       
    18. Lol. I'm kind of mean and am a loner. So I talk to my dolls and try not to "hurt them" I guess to entertain the social part of my brain. The best part is, they don't get snarky about the little things I do to enjoy myself. I don't think I'd be that offended if smack were to be talked about my dolls themselves, but the thing that makes me feel bad is if someone assumes I'm stupid or something after seeing me with dolls, or makes a comment related to them specifically meant to put me down.
       
    19. You've said this so perfectly! I totally agree.

      I have friends with VERY different views on certain topics, and I let them talk and say things that I don't agree with, but I care about them and hear them out. I may not always get the same favor in return, but oh well. Takes all kinds right? Funny though, that some people just expect that from you, and if you get upset over something they said, you're an idiot and should just get over it. Being the bigger, more mature person doesn't always work when a relationship ends up being so one sided. Yes, if you want to act silly/strangely, then your friends should accept it as part of who you are (the occassional upset is expected of course).

      Most people accept my doll collecting as they would any other hobby (or at least they don't call me crazy to my face). If people ask me questions, I answer them. If people get rude about it, implying that there is something wrong with me for being an adult collecting dolls, then I tell them its no different than collecting baseball cards, or first edition books, or restoring an old car. Its a hobby, so what? If they ask stupid questions like "aren't you afraid it will come alive at night and kill you?" then I turn the "its just a doll" comment on them. We're only here on this mud ball for so long, how you choose to spend your time is up to you. If collecting/playing with dolls is your thing, then go for it, and tell other people to deal with it, or move on.
       
    20. Personally, I don't see my Rikka as a "real person," but as an individual. I think there's definitely more to him and dolls in general than their resin. Our dolls are characters with their own unique personalities and quirks, and while they might not be living human beings, everything that makes them who they are is still in a sense "alive" in us. Thus, I treat them as such, and care for them. I'll talk to Rikka, dress him in warmer clothes if the weather is cold, cuddle with him, whatever. Resin or flesh, Rikka's a close, dear friend to me, but I know that not everyone will understand that.

      I haven't had hardly any problems like what you described, but I do have this one non-doll friend that will take these unprovoked "creepy doll" cracks at me at the most random, inopportune moments, and sometimes it can be REALLY hard to tell when she's joking or being serious about it. And unfortunitely, I don't think she realizes half the time that her "joking" isn't all that funny at all; It's just plain mean. Like today, during an internet conversation, she randomly described Rikka as "a creepy little doll that you treat like a real person," and laughed. I got a bit squicked, so I logged out and took some time to cool off before talking it out with her. She apologized, and we've more or less made up.

      You'll meet people like that once in a while, but ah well, to each his own. To quote something a different friend told me, if it [the hobby] makes you happy then keep going for it and not care what anyone thinks.