1. It has come to the attention of forum staff that Dollshe Craft has ceased communications with dealers and customers, has failed to provide promised refunds for the excessive waits, and now has wait times surpassing 5 years in some cases. Forum staff are also concerned as there are claims being put forth that Dollshe plans to close down their doll making company. Due to the instability of the company, the lack of communication, the lack of promised refunds, and the wait times now surpassing 5 years, we strongly urge members to research the current state of this company very carefully and thoroughly before deciding to place an order. For more information please see the Dollshe waiting room. Do not assume this cannot happen to you or that your order will be different.
    Dismiss Notice
  2. Dollshe Craft and all dolls created by Dollshe, including any dolls created under his new or future companies, including Club Coco BJD are now banned from Den of Angels. Dollshe and the sculptor may not advertise his products on this forum. Sales may not be discussed, no news threads may be posted regarding new releases. This ban does not impact any dolls by Dollshe ordered by November 8, 2023. Any dolls ordered after November 8, 2023, regardless of the date the sculpt was released, are banned from this forum as are any dolls released under his new or future companies including but not limited to Club Coco BJD. This ban does not apply to other company dolls cast by Dollshe as part of a casting agreement between him and the actual sculpt or company and those dolls may still be discussed on the forum. Please come to Ask the Moderators if you have any questions.
    Dismiss Notice

Just an object?

May 28, 2009

    1. I'm totally the same! My childhood teddies I have a huge attachment to. My dolls, I love them to bits and would be sad if anything happened to them, but I would rather them than lose my favourite childhood bear :)

      I see my dolls as beautiful toys, kind of a way to express myself artistically, because I like making clothes, dressing them up so they look nice etc.
       
    2. TrevviesBaby has a good point--not everyone who's dolls have characters and personalities attach are actually into rpg. I've never been into roll playing (not that there's anything at all wrong with it--it too requires a lot of creativity, I've just always gone in other directions), yet my dolls have very strong characters attached. I come at it more from a writing standpoint, though even if I didn't write things down, they would exist in my head--there's something about abjds that doesn't allow me not to have characters and personalities attached. For me (I realize this varies from person to person) it's what makes them so special and different from the other collectibles I own.

      While I might be a little bit of a doll addict, I also live in the world of work, bills, actual humans, and other responsibilities. However, this doesn't mean that one can't both be grounded in reality but also give themselves room to experience the less tangible things around us. I'm not sure why people like to set things up as an either/or situation (you can believe X about your dolls and have your head in the clouds OR be a responsible adult). However, human beings are multifaceted creatures and don't always fit into neat little boxes.

      People can feel whatever they want to about their dolls, and there's nothing that says they have to be anything more than a pretty object, but calling people childish it maybe not such a good way to go about things. How about trying to understand why a lot of us like to have characters and backstories? While it may not be what you're personally into, it's not nearly as out there as you're making it out to be ;)

      Absolutely true, just remember that respect goes both ways.
       
    3. I'd say that I myself do feel a stronger bond with my dolls, than 'just dolls'.
      But I know that they're just an object and I remember that when times are hard, or when I feel more intruged by another than the ones I own.

      Even so I do bond with them, but I won't say it's the doll I bond with. It's the character which I give them. I do not need the doll itself to cherish this character, but like this I have a way to touch them and ALMOST make them real.
      And they can also at times comfort me and make me smile, but I think anything you appreciate can do that. Not just dolls.
      That said, I'm not into the idea of replacing dolls from real social activities. I'd say they're more, for me, another way to get out and socialize with other people that have same interests for photography, art, painting, sewing and what not.

      The 'how you hold your doll' amuses me a little :P
      I DO hold my dolls almost like an infant, surporting them with only one arm, and my hand as their seat :P I find this the easiest way to carry them for longer periods of time, when you want them displayed of course. Otherwise; hand me a bag xPP
      BUUUUT all to it's extend. If I'm at my home, then I grab them by the waist, neck or legs (depends on their outfit and how tight they're strung).
       
    4. I'm a bit worried about taking up the "respect" subject. I have no intentions of showing no repect.

      And considering some activities known to me as childish, it's cause by the way I see world and have been brought up. Some of us have been shown what features maturity resembles and what childishness. How ever unfortunate my ways may be, I can't and won't change it.

      But... please note I have never said it's WRONG. It's not my way and probably I would never be able to get along with those of you, who prefer that emotional way of treating dolls. Still, I believe it doesn't disqualify us to discuss some general, common, matters on the subject. ;)
       
    5. Honestly, I don't think she's overreacting. I have never played a RPG in my life and I found that post - if not offensive, then definitely abrasive.

      It's hard NOT to take things personally, when you're being told that you are "extremely childish".

      It is absolutely right for each person to be into dolls for whatever reason is right for them. If you want to frame your doll in a shadowbox on a wall and never take it down, that is perfectly wonderful and fine if that is right for you. But by the same token it is equally wonderful and fine for someone to use their doll as a muse, representing a beloved character; to use it as a fashion model for their sewing hobby or business; a test subject for modding, painting, and creativity; a paperweight on their desk; a friend to hang out with; a connection to other people through role playing; a connection to a fantasy world of their creation; a dashboard decoration in their car; and any other use anyone comes up with.

      Years ago I used to love to write, but hadn't in ages. Despite working in a creative field, I hadn't really done anything artistic and creative of my own for years. UNTIL I got my first doll - now I'm doing faceups, creating characters, making photostories, practicing photography, learning to sew, etc. My dolls have characters and backstories - it's hard to write a character if you don't KNOW a lot about that character. If that's childish, I will happily remain a child the rest of my life, thanks. (And I'm 35, for the record.)


      ETA: AWESOME post Taco! I agree totally.
       
    6. I think it's the wording--sometimes stuff said on the internet can sound harsher than it's intended to be. But just trust me on this, if you suggest that someone is behaving childishly, that's usually considered an insult and suggesting that that behavior is somehow wrong or inappropriate. I do feel that having a little more flexibility to at least try to understand people who do things differently is a positive thing, though. In the end I can usually get along fine with people who don't have as much emotional investment in their dolls, because there are always other aspects of the hobby to discuss and their ways of playing with their dolls (even if very different from my own) are only one aspect of them as people--which is something important to keep in mind. Please don't assume that we aren't capable of being mature adults just because we play with our dolls differently than you do.
       

    7. Mature and childish is a subjective thing though. Some people consider reading comics childish, or watching cartoons, what about reading children's books like Harry Potter? I think it's a bad word to use, as it is usually used as a criticism, like immature, and people will take offense.
       
    8. Asatee, I'm not... really sure what you wanted to gain out of this thread ^^; But anyway... I think I believe childishness and immaturity to be found more in the attitudes of people, rather than their personal interests or hobbies...
       
    9. I think you have stated the important thing - what's mature and what's childish is really up to our way of seeing the world.

      And I do realise how unfortunate the word might have ended up in this discussion. My way of seeing this as "childish" probably is caused by the fact, I won't be able to become a big kid ever again. So much around me requires sober-thinking that sometimes such activites as those brought up here are just a reason for envy and a bit stuck up opinioning. It's just a hypothesis. I honestly can't tell.

      But please, I BEG you, don't name my "decorational" way of seeing Dollfies as putting them behind a glass-wall or whatever and just staring. Of course I would cherish them by just even touching those tiny hands. That's the beauty which cought my eye in those dolls.

      Do I need to gain anything? I just wanted to start a discussion about a thing I only GUESSED might be involved in the subject of Dollfies. Whether we all agree or disagree with eachother, I think it's worth seeing how many aspects our hobby has. Don't you think? :)
       
    10. I thought it was a bit off to claim you couldn't get along with anyone who had an emotional attachment to dolls, when you bought up the subject yourself, that's all.

      I think it is possible to have an emotional attachment to dolls at the same time as enjoying them as beautiful art objects, though. I don't take my dolls everywhere with me (I find them a bit unwieldy!), and for the vast majority of their time they sit on a bookshelf. However, I do have a strong attachment to them. They are a little more than objects for me.
       
    11. I think that this thread is starting to be more of a word discussion, than an actual on-this-topic dolly discussion.
       

    12. Suprisingly (probably for some of you now, as I have showed my views >.<) I do understand people may develop a strong emotional attachment. I'm just not one of those people. However, I absolutely do understand how those dolls are inspiring. And... I might have misunderstood the "backstories" thing. I saw it as (just exemplifying) two girls sitting in front of eachother and saying what her dollie just did yesterday. And explaining eachother why she has a sad face, because her other dollie sister got killed, whatsoever. That's what I would basically call childish. But when it comes to being an inspiration to create characters, put them into some witten works... well... I would do the same. They inspire my graphic activities!

      I'm not as much on the other side of this discussion as you might think. ._.

      I think my usage of word "childish" made this thread loose it's primar concept of sharing, HOW BJDs actually take part in our lives.
       
    13. I treat my dolls with the respect you would expect a person to treat an expensive item with. They do tend to just sit around on the floor, but I keep them out of sunlight and in an area where I can't step on them or drop stuff on them, where they are kept relatively free of dust and so on. If I take them outside, which is hardly ever, they go in a carrier of some sort.

      I don't have any super emotional attachment to my dolls, but they are things I've invested a lot of time and money in, so they're important to me. Between standard models and sato-gaeri services, they can all be fixed/replaced if something bad (earthquake, Kim Jong Il) happens, but there's a reason my dreams where my dolls melt or get messed up are so HORRIFYING. It's like the time my hard drive committed suicide. I was DISTRAUGHT. It's "just an object" but I treat my computer nicely and cried all day when years of data just got scraped away suddenly. I eventually got over it. But ... yeah. I figure the dolls are like that. Ranks somewhere above grandma dying (hardly ever saw my grandmothers due to geography) but below cats dying and somewhere around computer dying as far as how emotional I would get if something befell my dollies.
       
    14. I see my dolls as companions and friends, not just ''objects''. I know alot of people would disagree, but I believe that they do have their own souls ... like works of art who obtain a part of their creators soul and start a life of their own. Sometimes I would feel the mood changes of my dolls ... happiness, sadness, longing ... Our dolls are what we make of them! Mine are like guardian angels ... they are the ones who will always give you unconditional love and just be there for you when you need them. And I know I could never replace them, it just wouldn`t feel the same. We have a special bond, a connection that has formed between us. They`re definitely works of art and make wonderful displays, but there`s also so much more to them!
       
    15. Yep, fair play! Me too! :aheartbea

      I always enjoy hearing about how others take part in this hobby. Everyone does it a little differently! It's wildly versatile...! :)
       
    16. Well, I wouldn't consider myself a big kid either, as I have many more responsibilities at 31 then I did growing up (which is of course, completely normal, lol). Truthfully, this year has not been good for me--I've had more stress since November than I have had in a looong time. However, that's all the more reason for me to need something like the imaginative play bjds can involve--not as a way of avoiding problems, but as a way of letting go of some of the stress that gets built up. Writing about my dolls' characters is the least expensive thing there is to do with them. All I need is access to a word processing program, or just a pen and some paper which allows me to do something creative and constructive--it exercises my brain and my imagination the latter of which is not particularly taxed by my current job : P How much time I have to do various doll related activities varies, but I can always carry their characters and story ideas with me in my head to break up the daily tedium. The nice thing about story telling/developing characters is that it doesn't require one on one handling and can be done anywhere there's a spare minute. I don't know if this helps you understand or not, but I hope it does--it's no reason for envy and doesn't negate sober thinking when sober thinking is necessary ;)

      I have no doubt that you love and cherish your dolls just I as I love and cherish mine, and the people who like to just collect and look at them cherish theirs. There's as many ways to enjoy bjds as there are owners, which is one of the beautiful things about his hobby :)

      ETA: About the carrying thing (sorry I forgot about that part of the discussion)--I usually pick them up by the waist since that seems the most secure. When I carry them it's usually in the crook of my arm--it's less awkward that way.
       
    17. I think it depend on the situation.
      When I'm at home working with or on my doll, I have no problem leaving her lying around, or headless. Though I tend to always carry her by the waist. It just seems more secure.

      However, if I were posing her for photos, or showing her off an a convention I definitely would pose her nicely beforehand, or carry her in the crook of my arm.

      I do feel that I have an emotional attachment to her, but I don't think of her as a friend, or anything more than what my imagination makes her.
       
    18. I treat my dolls with great respect, since they deserve it, being exquisite art objects created by true artists. Sure it's considered a "distaff" art, and dolls are not taken seriously by the traditional fine arts world, but I think it's all in how you approach them. In any case, I like what I like, snobs be damned.

      Mine aren't toys, though they may have a name or a vague character profile. This just helps me visualize them better, and thus create them more realistically. For me, the most important thing is the doll, the physical thing itself, not the intangible "character". I've never had the patience or social inclination for RPG and I'm not a writer, though I don't disparage these things.

      I don't ever "play" with them carelessly, I don't carry them around (but I'm not a kid anyhow) I don't foist them on the uninterested.

      I treat all my things well because I'm grateful I have the kind of life where I can afford and house beautiful, rarified things. I don't take it for granted. There are places in the world where people have no access to beautiful things, and no kind of stability. I know "beautiful things" are not important for everyone, but they are to me and I'm grateful. To treat them badly or carelessly would for me, be a show of arrogance and complacency.

      I have some friends of a certain religious persuasion though (I won't mention just which one), who think it's okay to have fine things *only* if you treat them carelessly, to show that you are not "worshiping" them. My feeling on that is "then don't own them in the first place" but it's an interesting idea... perhaps meant to keep people focused on what's important in life, ie not material things.

      Uh... sorry for the long post!

      Raven
       
    19. Can you share, what's in those dollies that make you feel this way? Is it their eyes, very intruguing faces or... dunno, anything else? I really am curious since I'm one of those who see the hobby differently.
       
    20. I'm emotionally attached to them - the same as I'm emotionally attached to other items that are important/sentimental to me. I'm surprised people here say they can't understand it. There's nothing you own that would give you great heartache to have damaged or lost or have to sell? Being emotionally attached doesn't = treating something like it has feelings, you know. Those are two separate issues. I treat my dolls like I would treat anything that is expensive and important to me - in a way that doesn't damage them, and being something visual, I pose them in nice ways instead of just leaving them laying around. I have characters in mind for them but I don't give them human qualities otherwise. That doesn't mean I'm not emotionally attached, I would be very upset if something happened to them or I had to sell them, because I've spent time on them, and thus they've become a part of my life.