Other people handling your dolls

Hm, definitely something to think about. So far, I've asked dozens of doll owners if I can see their dolls, and most of them said, "Sure, would you like to hold him/her?" I'm not saying that you have to this, but I think you can refuse without embarassing the person by facing your doll to them and tell them something like, "Okay, but please don't touch his face, his face paint is very fragile." That way you imply that you're not going to hand over the doll and that you prefer that the person don't touch them.

 

Sher said
"wonder if we could charge admission for the ensuing wrestling over jenibelle match... I'd win, i'm chubby AND determined."

I am tall and strong, and equally determined, LOL!!

Hey, I'd be game, we could split the proceeds from ticket sales to help fund our doll addictions

I can see the headline now...

"Crazy women mud-wrestle to capture Jenibelle "

 

I don't think that makes you a snob. People should understand that your dolls are collector's items, and they should respect the fact that s/he's your property.

I mean, would you be offended if you went up to some lady, said, "YOUR KID IS SO CUTE CAN I TOUCH HIM?", and she said no/walked away/hit you. Would you?

Personally, it depends on who's asking. If it's someone I know I can trust, someone I know will be careful, why not? But a stranger... o___o

 

ops: I'd pay to watch that....

 

i would have probably said "well, he is extremely expensive and very fragile"

i guess i can understand why someone knowing nothing about bjds would be mad if you said they couldn't hold your doll.

i wouldn't let a person i didn't know hold my doll. if i'm at a doll meet, it is different though, i may not know everyone well, but i know they have dolls and understand how precious they are, and how to hold them, so in that situation, i don't mind if someone i've recently met holds my doll.

 

Reading through this thread, I guess I am in the extremely small minority.

Kurenai has been handled by many people, including my three year old niece who took off with him at my sister's house and played with him for several hours. If someone shows genuine interest in him and asks nicely, I see no reason why I wouldn't let them handle him.

I've been to several anime conventions where I have been treated incredibly rudely by BJD owners when I approached them with questions even, and if I didn't know other owners who were nice and meet a few friendly ones at cons, I'd think the whole BJD fandom was a bunch of snotty, rude elitists.

 

Well, I would let someone handle my doll if I knew them well and trusted they wouldn't do anything really stupid with it. @_@ My Mom bought me my Soony just recently and I am extremely protective over her because she means a lot to me... especially since she was a gift. I feel a little bad saying this, but I would be more likely to let someone hold my Kid Delf than my Soony, just because she even feels more fragile, if you know what I mean. Not that I don't love them both the same!

People think I'm rude though when I wont let them see my sketchbook (complete strangers)! ...now that I think is a little weird. A sketchbook is extremely personal.. right? ^^;

Hmm, that's right ~ When I went to Acen last year, I saw many bjd owners from afar. When I was waiting in line for my badge, I saw two girls with bjds, and I was oogling over them to my friend... I wanted to approach them, but one of the girls seemed very rude when other people asked her questions about her doll. It was kind of upsetting, you know that feeling you get from someone who you know thinks they are much better than you....

I was sad. Her doll was really pretty.

 

OK, I know I'll get yelled at for this, but it's something I've noticed around here, too. Some people always taking things as negatives and take them very personally (I ain't naming names- I couldn't remeber them anyway), while others just cruise through with a sense of humour.

I think the same is true inreal life. Some people assume that if someone approaches them with a question, it MUST be a secret hidden insult or a snide joke of some kind, while others just think people are interested in their doll. For people who always think the worst of others, the world is a very frihtening place and they lash out to protect themselves and make themselves feel more in control. For others, meh... even real insults don't affect them.

I'd say most people, however, are somewhere in the middle. If you have a bad day, you think everyone's after you... if your new BJD arrived that morning, you feel fantastic and nothing can touch you.

 

it depends on how they said it.. if they just said "don't touch him" I might get miffed but if you explained a bit and said, "please don't touch him because he's hard to clean" or "because I once had someone stain one of my other dolls without knowing it" then they should respond and that'll let you know if the person is trust worthy or not. But half the time I usually let ppl just hold (or if they know what they are and haven't held one I make them. xx they need to feel the love) my boys. xx But I don't think what you did was wrong to the guy, I think he was just being a fufubutt.

But I feel like the odd man out because I've never met a rude bjd owner. >> I've heard stories but never met one. >^^<'' Everyone I've ever met has been nice. I supposed it's good though. Still if bjd owners are rude then I say be rude back! And if they think your a total twit who knows nothing because you don't have your baby with your or he hasn't arrived yet then bring up some fact about bjds. Name the dolls factory name and I bet they'll lighten up a bit, because this one chick at the awa who was supposedly rude was nice to me when I asked her if her doll was an El. >^^<''' I guess it's kinda like otaku's who've been into anime all their lives fighting off newbies who think they're are it. (I've had to do it quiet a few times. xx) But I guess all we can here on the DoA is try to remember to stay cool, keep an open mind, and remember that some people just suck.

~suppi

 

personally, i'm okay with people touching him, but i do make sure to inform them that it's their risk ( XD to their bewilderment ) and would they please not touch his face. if they're really curious abut looking closely at his face and want his hair out of his eyes to do so, i'm more than happy to move it for them. i'm just cautious not to get his paint scratched by others, when i don't know how careful they will be with him.

so no, it wasn't rude, what you said to him.

 

This is very true. Sometimes when I'm having a bad day I won't even let my own family touch my MSD, but other times I could pretty much care less.

I don't really expect to be allowed to touch other peoples dolls really. I don't mind admiring them while thier owner holds them. I am an incredibly shy person so when people just come up to me and want to hold Thema my MSD I get kinda twitchy and probably come off mean, but in certain situations and with people I know I've been known to let go of her. My sister tho always tries to hold Thema at the WORST times. We go to the movies and in that rush after the movie is over she wants to carry her and gets mad when I tell her no. sigh~ I just can't win.....

But if you were to tell me no touching I wouldn't be mad. Cause I tell people no alot >_>;

 

^x^; God, now I feel like I must be the rudest person in the world...

At the A-kon doll meet, I asked to hold and touch so many dolls. ;-; I was excited and waiting for my doll's body to arrive, and being surrounded by so many lovelies... I'm also very physical. I felt a deep satisfaction in holding Kisaki's El, and in playing with another member's AR Diana's legs. And in sitting a Unoa on my knee and posing her arms.

n_n;; I must be a doll-owners nightmare! Oh well. I'll just squish Purin XD *squishes her*

As for my own doll... it'd depend on who. I know my friends would be gentle. I know my family would be gentle. Even though my brother's hate my doll, they'd still be respectful and not do anything to hurt her. A complete stranger...? Maybe. Not out on the street. At a dollmeet? Totally. It's a nice experience to give to a new doll fan, and I know they'd try to be careful.

Also, I guess I'm really not worried for my doll's safety. I'm pretty adept when it comes to sanding and repairing and painting. So I feel very confident handing her over to someone else, knowing all the while that I can handle any smudges or scratches or even chips. Through my own clumsiness, I've discovered how sturdy she really is XD

 

My family never touches Blanche, though I never specifically told them to....

If a stranger wanted to touch her, I would probably say no, she's delicate, or easily broken. I respect other people's stuff, especially if it looks delicate or old. If someone tells you to ne touche pas then you don't because sometimes there will be big consequences.

I had a bad experiance when my friends came over and Blanche was on the couch (I had mentioned her anatomical-correctness) and so they grabbed her, pulled at her underwear to see for themselves, felt her up and generally mistreated her. I was pretty p-d (and saying "DO NOT touch her face") but really I was panicky, so I didn't run in there and grab her. Now she stays upstairs a lot and I feel so bad because I couldn't protect her from that, I feel like I let her get violated *sigh* but that's what you get when you have stereotypical teens as your friend.

 

You always have the right to say no. It IS yours and no one but you has the right to do anything to it that you would prefer not done. It also helps to be polite if you can, but even if you're not it's still yours to decide who can touch and who cannot.

If they think you're a snob, well then that's just too bad. ^_^

 

The only times I've had were someone wanted to touch my dolls was at AnimeNorth, but they were all very nice and respectable and asked first. I don't mind someone holding my doll or touching them, as long as they ask first! (At this same con, I had someone see me with Ta-Kun and exclaim "Congrats on being a mommy!" It was so cute!)
But if it really bothers you to have someone not touch him, it's your right. It's not that you're being snobby at all. It's a personal preference.

 

I had a bad experience with a doll owner too, she snapped at me for asking. I was really polite too....

Recently though, I have been around a bunch of Arizona doll owners. All of them don't have a problem, but I always ask and make sure. I even ask if it is okay if I take pictures. When I get my girl I'll probably let -slective- people hold her. >< Here's my -look- list for letting people touch dolls(bah, rambling)

1. Are they OVERLY hyper/spastic? - I can understand being excited but some people I just downright SCARY and rabid when it comes to dolls or anime bishjounen(I'm into anime, so i make that tie)

2. Are their hands clean? - Okay, maybe its just me, but I don't want someone with greasy/sticky fingers touching my very expensive doll that I slaved over to scrape and save for.

3. Are they honestly interested? - Are they curious about the doll or are they just out to stea lit? >< You cannot be to careful these days.

But when it comes down to it, it all matters if you feel comfortable letting people hold him/her. Don't push yourself past your comfort zone. There are others options ^^

1. If you want them to hold him/her. Have them sit down and show them how to hold him/her.

2. Say no thnakyou, I feel uncomfortable, but you can still look at him.

Even though the person wants to hold him you can still let the person touch his/her hand or something. But like I said, it's all up to you.

Good luck!

 

I just had my first reaction to Kazutaka. My supervisor saw my magic eraser and related a story of someone trying to clean their child's hands with it. Then she asked what I used it for and I said, "Him. He's made of resin."

"Oh?" Her hands were hovering 'around' him, and then I told her he was very expensive and she fiddled with his blanket, but not him. Of course, she also said, "What's so special about him?"

"He's a collectors item."

"Ah. You collect a lot?"

"Mmhm, though he's my first real big purchase."

For some reason she was slowly retreating back to her cubicle space. X3

Kazutaka is a scary boy, he is.

 

It's a really good idea to have them sit down to hold your doll- cause some of these lovelies ARE really heavy!!

When I first picked up a Hound(his owner was very gracious x3) I groaned and laid him down cause he was so heavy. I don't know what I would've done if I were standing, and he were being passed from arm-to-arm.

Also, if the person holding the doll were to be shocked at their weight, they might drop them. x_X

 

I keep my dolls away from other people.

A friend of mine picked up a (plastic non BJD) doll of mine once, went to move her leg... snapped clean off in his hand!

This is unlikely to happen with a BJD, but (no offense to the non-neanderthal males out there), I've also had a dolls head ripped off for a 'joke' and been hit over the head with a Cabbage Patch Kid (for a 'joke', it really hurts of you've ever tried it).. all by different guys... who were in their 20s!

There's something that comes over certain, even grown up, boys...

This sounds like I've had a bizarre history of doll abuse at the hands of perverse males, but really they were all one offs! Especially after what I did to the guys afterwards...

I would also advise keeping dolls away from people who are rather drunk! If they don't like it, bollocks to 'em.

Maybe it's best to keep them out of sight in the first place, otherwise people will assume you're looking for attention for your doll.

 

I'm a very unphysical person. I hate it when people I don't know touch me (XD; I think a few people nearly lost their eyes when they hugged me at AX) or get into my personal space bubble, and I'd at least like the same respect towards me or my boy (when he gets here). I reserve the right to yank away when I'm approached rudely, but if someone asks nicely then it's no problem. ^-^ Same thing with passing around my dolly, I'd imagine.

Asks nicely, being the key words of course. "Hey, let me see your gay boy!" is a lot different than "May I see your doll?"