Rude Reactions to Your Dolls?

I've had people call my interest in dolls creepy too. This one person (the mother of my recent ex's children) stalked me online and sent me messages basically telling me to grow up and something along the lines of playing with dolls. I can't remember exactly what she said... but something to that effect. This was after she looked through my Deviantart page (which I gave him a link to) and, according to him, talked crap about me with her friends. I didn't reply and just ignored her, but it did hurt my feelings a bit at the time.

I don't recall anyone else really saying anything, besides my dad jokingly said they were creepy at first. But later he helped me film my box opening videos for my Iplehouse dolls. My mom and brother I think jokingly called them creepy too. However, I don't think my mom likes them that much even though she collects skeleton decorations.

Most of the older folks that lived in the assisted living place where my Gran lived actually thought they were pretty neat. I did all of my box openings in her apt there and showed them off downstairs.

The last few years I've mostly just avoided talking to anyone about my doll hobby.

 

To this day I feel like the rudest thing anyone ever said to me about this hobby in general was by a person who had been my best friend in the earlier years of university (we both went to art school). We had finished university that year and I was beginning to learn to experiment with bjd customization and he said in a very intentionally petty way "at least you're keeping busy". And that's when I knew the friendship was over. I never insulted his own experiments in art making and it pissed me right off that he said that to me. Nobody needs shallow selfish friends who bring them down when they are having fun and trying to expand their horizons.

 

I wanted American Girl/the babies from them when I was a teenager and older! I will never understand why this is such an issue. I think it's better to be "obsessed with dolls" than wasting my money on drugs, alcohol, or cigarettes like the majority of people I've known growing up Heck, if I had kids, I'd prefer they were invested in the doll hobby than out doing something inappropriate that could get them hurt, etc.

Wow... I would have been annoyed with the JoAnn lady too. But that kid grabbing your doll made me upset the most. Letting your child touch a stranger's stuff without asking first is not okay. What if it had gotten broken? I doubt that person would have wanted to pay several hundred dollars to replace it. Did they even apologize?

 

even certain amount bjd owners called my dolls creepy directly, in doll chats etc.
visitors of the doll exhibition where ukrainian bjd community is always presented constantly put fingers on my dolls and openly discuss how creepy they are. well, i always says "thank you"

 

With all seriousness I've had someone tell me dolls are husks for demons to crawl into and that I should remove them from my room to prevent demons from entering my territory. Although I honestly took that as the ramblings of someone who sincerely needs help . They also told me the same about televisions and horror movies. It was less rude and more concerning really?

 

WOW... this made me laugh and snort a little. I was assuming that he had long hair at first until I got to the end.

 

I don't think it's rude if someone finds a doll terrifying and tells you so. It's a statement of fact.

My sister HATES any dolls (they make her think of dead babies) right from when she was a child, she's never liked dolls, and I don't think it's rude of her to tell me so.

I have two friends who refuse to visit my home becuase they find my dolls so creepy.

That's not rudeness, it's how they feel. They have a right to those feelings and a right to let tghose feeling be know - I'm not some wilting flower who takes it as a personal insult if somebody doesn't like the same things I do, and I don't expect them to have to keep their dislike to themselves.

I never thought I would find any doll scary, until a few years ago when I was at a doll meet where several people had brought Blythe dolls, and somebody operated the eye-mechanism on one. To me, that noise of the mechanism and the fact that when the eyes open again, they're different eyes, just takes them into the Dr-Who-monster category of scary. It creeps me out, and I've called them "scary dolls" ever since.

Just accept that some people won't like your dolls, and some will. Just because you like them doesn't mean everybody else has to, and doesn't mean they have to keep their views to themselves. It's not rudeness, it's simply how that person feels about them, and why should they not say so. Different people find all sorts of different things scary - clowns, dogs, spiders, mice - whatever. Anad we know they find those things scary because they arent expected to keep their feelings hidden, they comment on it and talk about it, and inform people. Why should dolls be any different?

I think it's worse to expect someone not to ay if they don't like something than it is for them to say it.

They have just as much right to say they find a doll scary as you to do proclaim how much you like the doll.

If you post about something on a public forum/social media, you're inviting comments, and you don't get to censor other people's thoughts and feelings in that situation. You don't get to say, "I'm posting this publicly but I'm only interested in positive comments about it, becuase it I regard it as rude if someone has anything negative to say about it..."

Would you find it rude if you posted about a cherry pie recipe you liked, and someone commented that they don't think it sounds at all appetising because they don't like cooked fruit? Or if you posted about the Aragog scene in Harry Potter and someone responded that they won't read it becuase they find spiders terrifying...? they're just sharing their view/feelings on the suubject. hat isn't rude.

When it comes down to it, the person who DMed you about finding your doll terrifying COULD just as easily have commented openly where anyone could read it (and perhaps chip in with agreements), they didn't have to take it to a private message that only you would see.

Teddy

 

I have separate social media for my dolls because I know the majority of people don’t understand dolls, and as a very close minded person once told me, “I don’t like what I don’t understand.” I’m surrounded by people like that unfortunately but surprisingly I have found a few that love my dolls, none of the people I show them to have rude reactions.

 

My feelings on this are, saying what you want is your choice, but so are the consequences of saying it. To some, these dolls are their artistic expression, extremely personal, and when someone who did not have to walk up and talk to you, does, and says it is creepy, one has every right to take it as rude or hurtful. One did not walk up to that person and force them to look at the doll. Just like someone online was not forced to look at your posted photos. You are entitled to feel your feelings, but going out of your way to tell someone what they are has consequences as that person is also entitled to their reaction to said feelings, both good and bad.

That’s my feelings on the matter, and I understand if not everyone feels the same. I am not meaning to argue, just stating a different view regarding comments.


@NineOneThree I also have separate social media for dolls, it helps keep things nice.

 

I think it's all how you tell someone, really. But it also takes practice to react well to something that genuinely unsettles or frightens you, and most people simply don't have that practice. I'm afraid of clowns, and when I see one I just remove myself from their vicinity. But I come across clowns (figurines or dolls moreseo than actual people) in real life far more than most people come across dolls, especially bjd with uncannily realistic or highly stylized human features. There are lots of sculpts and companies that elicit strong reactions from me, and I've been in this hobby for years, so it doesn't surprise me that people with little to no exposure would react even stronger.

I haven't shared my doll collection with other people, so I haven't had to deal with any rudeness on that front. I do, however, have a small collection of antique Disney marionettes, and people react about as well to puppets as they do dolls, which is to say: not well. Which is why, on the rare occasions that they come up in conversation, I tend to preface them with "they can be a little unsettling or creepy to people" and I don't share pictures without spoiler tags. Right now, my dolls and marionettes are packed up (I just moved) but when I have them displayed, I plan to do so in a way that makes them easy to temporarily hide if I have a guest who finds them unsettling, because I want my friends to be comfortable in my space. I'm not offended by someone else's dislike or discomfort- that can't be helped, honestly. And being accommodating of it upfront has, in my experience, really reduced the level of negativity I've experienced.

 

I think rudeness comes from context and it's not rude to tell someone you don't feel comfortable going into their house/room/ seeing the doll in person because you have a phobia, however I do think it's rude to tell anyone randomly that you think their doll is frightening if it's a doll you've seen by accident on the internet or in person when somebody has their doll in public. Not to undermine the fear, but it does seem like the best mode is to quickly navigate away from the frightening thing instead of taking time to try to make the other person feel bad about having the doll. In public we are just all doing our own personal things, and as long as those things aren't illegal there is nobody to police things that upset one person or another. I know because I have massive sensory issues and it ultimately my own problem to have to deal with alone.
A partner of mine had a friend who was really afraid of dolls, and so he didn't come to our apartment, but it was a situation where he didn't say ugly things to me about it and we didn't try to make him feel bad about his fear either. (If he needed to come over I could have accommodated him as well)

 

I've gotten many different ones. Usually it's people telling me they are a waste of money and time.
No, they are not. They actually do quite a bit for me but that's none of your business.

I've also been told they are creepy, that I should dispose of them all because waste of space, that they just simply think I shouldn't want a doll because "it's pretty to me", etc etc.

Now to note: if you find my dolls creepy, fine. I don't mind you stating it. That's your opinion and I respect that. Repeating yourself over and over again IS RUDE. Heard you the first time, it does not need repeating.

Luckily, no one has come into my home demanding I hide them away.

I've also had people who just don't understand collecting them in general.

Luckily I can ignore most of that because everyone I know close to me supports it. My other half may not like my dolls himself but he likes that they make me happy.

The free doll thing irks me. I'd rather at least someone offer to buy it at a proper amount even if I say no. I'm not about to just give out my dolls. I've bought gifted dolls but that's my choice.

I'm so terribly protective over my dolls even the children I know and niece and nephews know full well never to touch one. I'm sure their mom would not appreciate being told they broke a $600+ doll or one that's irreplaceable.

Also on the creep factors: I've been told they'd come to life too and I just respond with "I wish they would! I wouldn't mind having little people to talk to during the day at home. In fact, I'd probably be happier ".

 

My brother thinks my doll is creepy. I am actually surprised my parents have said nothing lol.

 

For whatever reason my parents are much ruder about me sewing for dolls vs. the dolls themselves...they're always making comments about why can't I spend time working on something functional (I just learned how to sew like last year, I don't want to use a ton of fabric on failed human-sized clothing!...) or how my skills are being wasted on someone who can't get married/ sew for a husband and kids etc. (I have no idea where this one is coming from as I've not come out to them). Then again the only doll I've shown to anyone irl is my anime one and everyone who knows me already knows that I collect anime-related things so it's not really news.

 

Considering that I own some rather unusual sculpts, I'm a bit surprised that I haven't gotten more comments from people about them. I do recall one of my former boss's wife saying that my Sugarable naga (tiny sized) was scary because of his snake tail. She was okay with the other dolls she'd seen that I brought to work but she simply doesn't like snakes so I can see where she got the scary feel from him even though I think he's too adorable to be scary.

Interestingly, people usually respond with fascination to my SoulDoll Vito Azreal skull head. Half his face is a literal skull with the "bone" showing and they're more curious than grossed out and usually look him over carefully to see all the details. To be fair, the bone side of his face is not done in a gory fashion so maybe that has something to do with it? People have commented on how grumpy/ticked off my Unidoll Ark looks but he is the angriest sculpted doll ever.

I have had people ask where I got them and how much they are and they're almost always shocked at the price. Several have said they'd never pay that kind of money for just a doll. I just shrug and say that everybody has a hobby that others don't get. I've had people ask why I waste my money on the dolls. I ask them why they waste their money on booze/cigarettes/whatever since when they buy that stuff, they use it once, have a fleeting bit of fun and then it's gone forever where I get something that I'll have and enjoy for years AND that has re-sale value.

My husband doesn't like dolls (any dolls) and calls them my creepies. But he also knows I love my dolls and get a lot of joy from them so he has a whatever attitude. He won't touch them and certainly doesn't get why I enjoy them but he's happy for me that I enjoy them.

 

I feel that a lot of people don't get scared by skulls because they are pretty prevalent. Whether it's Halloween decorations, skeletons in medical/school settings, or even on clothing, they are everywhere. People are just used to them. Although I'm in agreement that an added "gore" factor could have possibly had a different affect.

Plus, unlike snakes they don't come with an active threat. People can imagine a living breathing snake coming at them when they see pictures/models which enhances the fear factor. A skeleton in and of itself isn't that scary in comparison imo.

But honestly, I love snakes and skeletons so I'd probably just be asking loads of questions about your dolls

 

I never showed my dolls to that many people outside hobby spaces. I think with for me because I work in the arts that luckily most people around me don’t think anything of it.

One time I do remember though was a girl I knew from university would always make the same sort of kind of rude comments on my doll pictures on instagram, though it wasn’t only about my BJDs I had a sphynx cat then so she made comments about him too. I think she thought it was funny but it kind of hurt my feelings ><