Stranger in the (P)ark - interacting with onlookers while taking photos

I think you handeld it well.
You put in the work and the money to set those pictures up, even if you did it in public. I think it's perfectly understandable that you want to be the one who reaps the benefits from it.

Laws on when and what you are allowed to photograph varies a lot between different places, so I'd say thats the first thing to be aware of. In some places, if you do something in a public place, then people can take photos without your consent. But even when something is allowed by law, we all have a resposibilitiy to be civil about it.
At least she asked first and gave your the chance to speak up and it sounds like she did honor your refusal, so that's something, I guess.

In my opinion the fact that you may not have minded when you were younger has no relevance on your right to say no now. Consent doesn't work like that. Having a habit of asking before doing is not there to protect the people who are allready ok with something, it's to protect those who isn't.

 

It's a different viewpoint for everybody, honestly, but I personally don't see why you'd refuse them permission to take pictures.

You have no ability, or right, to enforce such a refusal. You and your dolls are in a public place and they could simply ignore your refusal to give permission and take pictures anyway.

They don't even have to ask, they could just do it and they wouldn't be doing anything wrong.

If you were exhibiting them in a gallery, and there was a no-photography rule in place in general for the gallery, or for that particular exhibition, they would be agreeing to abide by the gallery rules as part of gaining entry to view your work, but that doesn't apply if you are somewhere public.

Teddy

 

I understand why the situation felt frustrating for you, I would also not appreciate a stranger coming to photograph something I'm doing while minding my own business. They did ask for permission and respected your answer, though, which I find a positive point, regardless of the attitude. Can't really fault them in the interest either - I, too, enjoy taking snaps (respectfully) of out-of-ordinary things I see when out and about in public space as an extension of my memory. I don't really think it's on anyone to judge why and how they plan to enjoy their photoroll though, as long as it doesn't rudely override anyone's consent.

Legally, you own copyright of the photos you took, and the items you made, but can't restrict anything that isn't making a copy of them. I don't really see a third party taking a casual pic as reaping cream off your work, whether or not they may upload it somewhere, but it's fair if you feel like it violates your comfort and consent, and you are within your right to say no.

Tl;dr: consent is key, but we also mustn't judge people's intentions without knowing what they are.

 

I would have probably declined it as well.

I am used to people coming over and asking questions, or just watching and nodding with a smile while walking past. I am fine with that. As long as they stay away from the doll or not attack me, it is whatever to me.
However, a person coming over with a camera or with their phone immediately makes me think they will probably use it to post it online and say something bad. Or it gets out into an internet sphere away from BJD circles, which also means comments end up negative. Or someone, maybe even the photographer, makes up a fake story that gets attached to the picture.
I just don't trust most people to be respectful about a niche hobby that surrounds something a lot of people think of as "creepy".
It is also my doll, and not some statue that belongs to the city. I don't wanna be photographed by a stranger, and same for everything I own And certainly not something that is also very recognizable. If you photograph my shoes, that is one thing, but a specific doll can potentially be tied to a specific person.
Yeah yeah, I know, sounds like a lot of paranoia talk. But 20+ years online have made me yearn for privacy and safety where possible.

And the fact that people think they have the constant right to photograph everything outside AND post it online is something I am not a fan of either. Yes, I am doing my little hobby thing here without bothering anyone, that does not give you the right to document it and blast it online for everyone to see. Have some decency. I don't do it to other people as well, even though public transport in a big city gives you enough fodder at the "weird people" front

In the end, I know I can't stop them. Germany has strict laws when it comes to photographing people in public, but of course that does not pertain to dolls.
But if they gotta take the picture, I'd prefer they'd rather do it from far away and without me knowing

 

I don’t like my photograph being taken, so I appreciate the chance to say, “please no.” But in my country, it’s perfectly legal for someone to take it if I’m a public space. Yet, there are limits on what they can do with it. They can’t say, use it for advertising or make it look like I endorse something.

So, I don’t think I could do anything about my dolls being photographed. If someone posted it on facebook to say, “look what I saw in the park”, I don’t see a lot of harm in it. If they were going to publish it in a book, that would be really annoying.

 

I have no experience with such encounters in public, as I´m way too shy to take my dolls outside, but I don´t think you behaved wrong.
Simply put, she asked and you answered. I agree with Lillith about it being positive, that she asked before and went away after you declined.
I probably would have also declined, because I wouldn´t want someone to take a picture of it, only to make fun of it or something. (Even if I would probably never reach my ears, if the person didn´t seem very interested in the hobby itself, the possibillty would forever be in my mind and would leave a uncomfortable feeling.)
If I put as much work as you in the styling of my dolls, I would also worry, about her posting my dolls online and saying it was her work or something. (I´m not much on social media, but I know such things happen all the time, maybe not so much with dolls, as they are not that popular, but it always annoys me, when I see someone posting art of someone else without giving proper credit, or even acting like it was their own work.)

I´m not complety in the law of these things and it´s probably different in every country, but if OP doesn´t want her to take a picture of their own property, they don´t have to let her. Of course you can´t tell her, that she can´t take pictures of this public place, because your doll is sitting there, but that doesn´t mean you have to make way for her to take a picture. OP can move their arm or body in front of their doll or even put it back into it´s bag, to prevent it from having pictures taken. So yes, in my opinion OP has the ability to enforce such a refusal.
Though I also think, if she already made a picture before she asked, it´s not possibel to demand from her to delete it.

 

She probably wanted to just gossip about the weird person with the weird dolls with her friends or make some stupid tiktok about it , you did very well to deny it's great luck she even asked for permission . That's why I never take any dolls in public spaces the real "weirdos" think of me as the weirdo even if they are the ones who can't stop themselves of shoving their camera lens onto people they don't know or their stuff.

 

The person probably only had ill intent with what they were going to do with that video/pic/ whatever they were trying to do. In this day and age, sadly there are a lot of rude, oblivious people out there who try to get attention from reels and tiktoks, even if it means mocking people or making them feel uncomfortable. And sadly, I've seen a reel where someone filmed a smart doll owner photographing their doll. The comments were unnecessarily cruel and I was disgusted.

As someone who also likes anime and video games, I've seen this in-person at events as well. One time a child had his friends film him as he walked up to people in a line of video game fans, and started asking really inappropriate questions. Everyone was uncomfortable but he only stopped filming because people ignored him. And in these cases that's the best thing you can do along with telling them no.

100% you're in the right. And you didn't do anything wrong. You handled the situation calmly and maturely.

 

I agree with everybody up here: I think you handled the situation very well.

But Ara and Lilith were both right in the sense that the laws are different where you go/where you are. And what's OK to photograph in public will be different from place to place. I would probably put up a small sign that says "Photography in session" and explain to the onlookers that the dolls are photography models. It's similar to how people who take wedding photos in public places sometimes have small signs that tell others what's going on. It's one more thing to carry, sure. But it might help with avoiding future encounters?

 

I see it in a completely different way probably because I receive very little attention online for it other than from approximately 3 supportive friends.

Not that anyone has tried yet, but I don't care if someone takes photos of my dolls or claims my photos or dolls as their own, with the obvious exception of a person in the counterfeiting business. It's a little tough to fake life in dolls anyway so they might as well steal my photo since I can do better! Their silly little phone snap is not going to impress their Instagram followers. I'm willing to bet that unless they're a photographer or are interested in amateur doll photography, it will in fact look bad.

Someone did politely ask and I let them take photos of Hina once. I didn't ask to see because I'm sure he got her worst angle! He probably wasn't looking for Instagram clout though.

I'm not insecure about owning them because they're physically in my house and I can just pull them out and give them all a smooch anytime. Maybe my opinion will change once someone actually does claim my dolls or photos as their own, but for now, the thought just makes me laugh. If you need the small dopamine rush from (re)posting my dolls, enjoy?

 

I see my dolls as my art as well. Whatever the lady's intentions were, if someone was being pushy with me, I would have said no. It's my stuff, I can do what I want with it. Can I stop her? Nope. But if she wants to freely photograph dolls, she can spend the time and money to get her own.

That said, if someone politely showed interest in my doll, I might let them take a photo. It just depends on the situation. Only you can know what you're comfortable with, and if someone is off-putting, it doesn't matter what their intentions are. "We can't stop them" doesn't mean we have to be okay with whatever, imho.

 

I can understand you. I wouldn´t want a stranger to show off for what I paid for, too.

 

Based on her behavior, she was likely going to post the pictures of you with your doll to make fun of you. Like "OMG look at this creepy girl doing voodoo in the park" or something. She sounds like the type.