Too young for the hobby?

Probably in all states, there's a law where a child can't get a 'real' job until they turn a certain age. I know in my state, it's until they turn 14.

 

I have to say, when I was a kid, my mother provided me with everything I asked for. And that added up to A LOT of Barbies and accessories and even porcelain dolls. She did the same for my brother except with Ninja Turtles. And we weren't even REMOTELY rich and, strangely enough, me and my brother weren't spoiled and we valued our things. Our mother provided these things because she wanted to give them to us, not because we asked. I can guess at the reasons why but I have no real idea and, unfortunately, she's passed so I can't ask her. But, buying stuff for your children does not automatically equal spoiled brat. And, even if it did, so what? If a spoiled kid who gets everything gets a BJD too, it shouldn't matter to anyone. Not everyone has to work hard for a BJD and not everyone has to appreciate a BJD for what it is or is perceived to be. It sucks but it's the truth.

 

I'm 14, and I'm really happy to see that there're younger owners here btw haha Like most people are saying, if you're mature enough, then you can have a doll. Whenever I talked to my parents about dolls, I'd explain everything from being fully customizable to over 2 feet tall and hand made so they know that I know what I'm talking about and why they're so expensive! (They were taken aback on the price) Now, if a kid simply said, "I want a bjd" and their parent just said okay without knowing anything or even considering the fact that these dolls need care, well... we can assume that doll won't be that happy :/
I wanted a job since this past summer to start paying for big things myself because I didn't always want to ask my parents for things anymore, but when I bought my first bjd, my dad offered to help out :3

 

I actually didn't say it was spoiling the child - I just mentioned that if people had an issue with parents buying a young child an expensive doll, that would be the point of contention rather than the doll itself. I also didn't specify if it bothered me personally or not, and I don't really care what people buy/don't buy their kids. Very sorry to have offended you!

Also, for the "earning" comment, I mainly meant that if they can get what I consider a real job, then they are obviously responsible enough to research a doll and properly care for it. If they're just given the doll, that is no indication of them being responsible or irresponsible. I didn't mean that they don't automatically deserve it if the money comes from the parents. However, I do think it's a bit silly to equate what some people consider chores to "working hard", though. Many of the parents I know give their kids $100 a week just for them keeping their rooms moderately clean. (As in, if the bed is made and the floor is visible, they get $100.) This, to me, is so trivial that there's not any difference between this and just giving them money, particularly if you compare this to what type of work some kids do. For instance, several kids I know voluntarily work on their parents' farm all summer. Others mow lawns or do other tasks for neighbors. Some even do tutoring at young ages. These are examples what I consider a "real job" for a child. Should kids be required to work 8 hours a day in order to get anything? Of course not. Also, I'll admit that maybe what some people consider "chores" is more demanding than simply keeping a room clean.

The main reason I even replied to the thread was to state that I don't see why buying a child a doll is such a big deal. In no way did I mean to imply that children should never be given gifts just simply because the parents want to buy them a gift.

 

I really think that 12 maybe mature enough to have a doll. But I worry that she may become frustrated with the hobby. Here's why, let's say she gets her new doll and it wonderful but it's needs a new set of clothing. Well, she either needs to make the new set of clothing herself, have her mom make it for the doll or buy it online.

The problem is she most likely can't buy online. There are ways. She can have her parents buy it for her. But her parents would most likely want to wait for a special occasion or something that she really deserves to be reward for before spending $100 on an outfit. She could get a prepaid Visa or Mastercard. But that could be frustrating. I am not sure what allowances are like anymore but I use to get $20 a week for lunches and spending money. It would be five weeks until you buy a full outfit if you didn't spend on anything else.

And she might be a very talent seamstresses. And that's why the mother though this would be a good idea for her daughter. But even then, the problem may arise in other areas. For example, what if the faceup gets damaged or she just doesn't care for anymore? Is she going to do a new faceup by herself?

This is my personal opinion as well whenever I have a questions about BJD I come here. Because it wealth of knowledge. And I think that it's really helpful. And I think the hobby would be much more overwhelming without it.

So basically, I am saying that there is really no one too young for this hobby. But it might be harder to do if you are younger because of the built in age restrictions of doing transactions online.

Also, this might be me but I wouldn't want a BJD as a gift. Because there's too much involvement in it. I like to be surprised by my gifts. And if someone wanted to get a gift I would basically have to help them though the whole process to make sure it's the right thing. "No normal skin instead of white skin. White skin stains too easily. Gentle body. Faceup. Wig and outfit. 16 mm mystic blue eyes. ect." And it's easy for someone unfamiliar with the hobby to accidentally order a MSD dress instead of SD dress.

And because it "art" thing there's also the problem of style. While I might think a dress is well made but it might be a dress that is my style or the style for that doll. And what if someone gives you this beautiful Dollheart outfit but your doll is a punk rocker?

 

I hear that there are these dolls called "American Girl" that are pretty expensive and can have their wigs changed and there are lots of clothes and accessories for them and so on, and somehow nobody questions the appropriateness of children owning said dolls.

Because they are dolls, and dolls are toys, and toys are for children. We all are playing with children's toys, we don't need to go elitist and high-brow about the fact that we, adults, play with dolls.

 

I get what you are saying. I do. But that's not the point I was trying to make. It's not the price really... it's more of the availability. A lot of the items, are only available online which limits the access to an younger person. To be an EBay member you must be 18 year old. To have a paypal account you must be 18. To have a credit card you must be 18 year old. These things limit a younger person access to fully enjoy the hobby.

 

I'm 14 and I'm purchasing a doll- earning it though, slowly but surely.

I think what mainly matters in the end is basically how you take responsibility. If the kid is mature enough to understand a bjd, take care of it, then why not? I don't see why age is such a big deal. There are probably younger people who are more mature than me ^^; If they earn it- great! If their parents purchase it, then that doesn't matter too. Just because parents buy it for their child, doesn't mean they're spoiling the kid. Perhaps they're making an investment because mom wants to get into the hobby too, who knows! Or perhaps they just decide that the kid's earned it somehow. A parent would not purchase a 400$ doll for a child who doesn't have responsibility.

Like they all say, age is just a number~!

 

I love my doll a lot and I love the hobby too, so don't misunderstand.
I don't think age have anything to do with it. Dolls are still just material things and anyone could do whatever they want with it. It sure is expensive though, so it would be a real waste of money to destroy it. If I would let someone hold my dolls or someone else's doll is another thing, because they mean something to me or someone else. They have a personality to us and then is there no-one who has the right to destroy them in any way.
I might not feel that I wanna go to meets with seven year-olds who don't really know anything about the hobby than that they have a doll on their own, but it doesn't take the right away from them to own them. As far as they don't hurt them selves (resin is toxic after all) or anyone else no-one can say there are to young for them.

 

To be perfectly honest, I do not think 13 year olds and younger should be buying BJDs. I think $400 + is wayyy too much to spend on something when you're that young. I am 20, living on my own with a job and college classes, I have to be an adult, but I still struggle with proper dolly care!! When I was 14 I got my first pullip, and lost the parts to her body. I now consider myself too young then to properly care for pullips, let alone BJDs.

However!! If the kid is, like the ones posting on this forum, active in learning information and research (as so many 13 year olds arent before making purchases) on a dolly forum, and understands what entails from buying a strung resin person, I wouldn't see why saving up for a doll they can handle is a problem.

But if it's just some mother seeing your doll on the street, with no clue how the doll works, and the care involved, she should NOT be buying her 12 year old a BJD. And hearing the price with out a phase? Aye that makes me wince aha.

And I really don't believe "age is just a number". It is not. Age is a representation of the years you've spent on the earth, and the knowledge you've gained. To say a 14 year old knows any where near the same amount as a say, a 45 year old, is undermining what the 45 year old has been through. I understand maturity level varies! I'm not saying someone 15 can't be more mature then a 21 year old, but someone 15 has less life experience nontheless. I've met 65 year olds that act 12, but I still treat them with respect because they ARE older then me, and have learned so much more. Just my bit

 

Completely depends on the kid. I'm 57 and I have dolls from when I was little that are in perfect condition because I was very careful with my dolls. I would have loved a BJD when I was little and they aren't any more delicate than some of the old hard plastic dolls. I would have cared for it very gently. I did not cut hair, draw on faces with crayons or pens, etc.
On the other hand, I had a friend who got a beautiful, very expensive Madame Alexander (the rare Sleeping Beauty doll from 1959). It was my first experience with really coveting something that belonged to someone else. Her grandmother got it for her for Christmas. I would say within a couple of months the dress was torn, the hair was all ratty, it was dirty, etc. She ruined the doll. It broke my heart.
So it all depends 100% on the kid. I would not buy a child a $2000 Volks fullset limited, but I would see no problem with certain children owning for instance a Bobobie Sprite. When I did a display of my dolls last year at the art center, the dolls were all in a case, but I had a Sprite there for people to pick up, hold, play with, etc.
A little girl about 8 years old fell in love with my Sprite. I could tell by the way she very carefully held her that it would be a very special doll for her and that she would treat it well. Her grandmother was there and spoke to me privately- she was really agonizing over buying one for the grand daughter, but just couldn't justify the cost. She finally ended up getting her an American Girl doll and the little girl was happy with that. I imagine she spent just as much on the AG doll and stuff for her, but those dolls are sturdier and probably better for a younger child. But still- I think this particular little girl would have been fine with a BJD.

Remember that children used to play with dolls made of porcelain, and many of those have survived for collectors to buy.

 

Sure kids need to have fun, but I'm not sure a 500$ doll is the best solution. The fun for me when I was a kid was playing outside with other children or painting or anything else. How should a BJD destress a kid? It's not like Barbies that most other children have and therefore can play together. I'm very happy I didn't know BJD when I was a kid and that my parents never bought me very expensive presents, not only because they couldn't afford it, but because they didn't think that expensive presents would make us happier. And indeed, I've never missed it. Am I weird?

 

I think most people have said this already, but I also think it depends on the child. If they are careful and mature, I think they could have one. But I also think that if it's just an outright gift, they will be less likely to take good care of it. I think they should have to show that they can take care of their other, less expensive dolls/toys first and maybe do a little work to get it.

 

I say like everyone else that it depends on the person. For example, I got a $3500 cornet (an instrument, a sort of small trumpet) when I was 12, and those are MUCH more fragile when it comes to dropping it than BJDs, and you have to take them totally apart and wash them several times a year. I had no problems keeping it pretty and intact, and was very careful because I knew the price of it. Most mature 12-year olds would take good care of something valuable and fragile, I think.

Then again, I was always extra mature for my age; the kid who finished "His Dark Materials" and all the "Harry Potter"-books then released by 3rd grade of elementary, and who could see the depth of "Lolita" as a 11-13-year old ^^;

But my point, it depends on the child. I disagree though on the child having to pay for the doll himself/herself, which many others here seem to find important. Many children that age don't have any possibility of raising that money in less than at least a year, and so I think that if the parents are willing to pay that much for it to give it as a gift, that shouldn't be any problem.

 

The availability of buying over the internet, though, depends on the country. Here you have to be 13 to have a bank card, and 14 or 15 (can't quite remember) to use said card to shop over the internet. If you have a bank card, you can also easily create both an eBay- and paypal-account without any hassle, even if you're not 18...

 

First off I totally agree with this ~ that as long as the person is mature enough there really should not be an age limit on how old he or she must be to purchase a doll. Younger collectors, however, may have difficulty obtaining certain pieces of their doll due to payment restrictions. But, I wanted to point out my own exception to this case as I am 16-years-old and allowed to freely use my mom's Paypal account whenever necessary as long as I give her the same amount from my own money, usually in cash. This way I can purchase whatever I need whenever I need it while working around the issue of being under 18. Of course every household is different and I am sure this method would not work for everyone, but it is a solution for those who are not old enough to have their own Paypal or Ebay account. In fact, my mother happens to be quite lenient as long as I have the money to cover what I buy she is fine with it~

Anyways, maturity, ultimately, should be the deciding factor on who should have a doll ~ If someone is able to properly care for it then age should not matter. In the end though, no one really has a say in what another person does or does not purchase, so if a rather immature child (or even adult) buys a doll or is gifted one, it is their decision.

 

I think that if a parent has the money to buy their child expensive gifts like BJDs, then it's absolutely ok. The parent is an adult and has the right to choose what they're spending their money on, however absurd it may seem. Once a child is older and can do chores and save their own money, if they can save for a BJD then more power to them.

 

I agree with cirquemom...it all depends on the kid and the circumstance. my younger daughter had a friend over who was so obnoxious I thought she would break my house. I took her home and told her mother to never bring the little monster back.
My daughter on the other hand is very mature for a 10 year old...more mature than her college age sister! She got her first BJD for her birthday when she was 8 and she now owns three. She is very careful with them and has bought clothes with her own money. If she was the type to break her dolls , I would never have bought her any!

 

Yeah it pretty much depends on the kid. Honestly, physical age nowadays cannot entirely dictate 'too young' or 'too old.'

Molliebean mentions her 10 year old who has shown she is mature enough to handle BJDs since she was 8... my aunt (who has collected dolls) is almost 60, and I would never *ever* trust her to take care of a BJD. You really can't trust her to take care of anything regardless of value, and it would be a waste of money for her to get one or be bought one.

Young children can learn early to take care of things and can even be trusted to do so.... sadly more so than a lot of full grown adults. So... basically, one is not necessarily 'too young' for this hobby. It's more that some are... too immature for the hobby IMO.

 

All depends on the person О.о Some little girls concern dolls with such trembling and care...and adult girls throw dolls