Too young for the hobby?

I probably would never buy a child a BJD...but depending on the child, I would be happy to show them my dolls in a supervised setting.

My reasoning is, although some children are mature and treat their toys like golden figurines, most children don't. I know more children (and adults too) who treat items in a disposable way and abandon some things in favour of something newer. A BJD is a toy, but it's an expensive toy. Even lower priced dolls involve an investment of cash and that's before buying clothes, wigs and eyes. I wouldn't be comfortable with buying an expensive doll for a young person, even if they begged, pleaded and cried, because there's always the risk that the BJD is going to get passed over for another hobby. Then what happens to the BJD? Do I have to keep a doll chosen by someone else, that may not be to my taste? Minefield.

However, if the young person showed their own determination to get a doll by arranging with their parents to do chores for pocket money and to save their earned money towards their doll, I'd support that. If the child decides to spend what they've saved on their BJD or on a new bike or a new gaming system, it's demonstrated to them how saving up works and that money is hard to save but easily spent.

 

I don't think that age matters as long as you are mature and know what you're dealing with, the value of things etc. I know people in the hobby who are twenty or more that can't take care of their dolls and just don't care. And then I know i 13 year old who is so loving and tender with her doll.

I think it's really more about your upbringing maybe. We didn't have a buttload of money when I grew up, so I took good care of my things. Some people just don't see the value and therefore don't care. This has nothing to do with age (in my opinion).

 

I don't think that anyone is too young to own a BJD if they are really into them, as long as they act responsible and take care of it...heck, if they get a job to pay for it themselves they are pretty much responsible enough in my book (I've only ever had one summer job before).

 

I do agree that age does not equal maturity; much like others who pointed this out, I met my share of very mature kids and very immature adults.

However, after reading most of the replies in this thread, a theme that I'm noticing is the notion that if a child didn't save and pay for a doll (or, some portion of the doll) out of their own money, then they must not be serious enough about acquiring the doll. I have to disagree with this for the following reasons.

Not every parenting style involves giving kids money. I grew up in a culture where kids were never given an allowance or paid to do chores. I was expected to help around the house, to the best of my ability, because I was raised with the idea that families take care of each other and of their living environment because that's what families do, not because there's an expectation of being compensated monetarily. I knew that my parents were the ones in control of our household finances and they are the ones making decisions on how those finances get allocated. I could, and did, ask for toys and other things I wanted, but I realized that it was up to the parents to decide if our household can afford what I'm asking for. If we could, I'd get the item, if not, I'd have to wait until we had the means to buy whatever it is I wanted. And, I had to wait very often, as my parents did not have much disposable income when I was growing up.

Being raised this way, there's no way that I could have saved for anything. This did not make me more or less responsible and mature. The parent/child dynamic in the country where I grew up is such that the children/teenagers rarely work until they are out of college and start building a career. However, once the children start working and becoming independent, they are expected to take care of their elderly parents financially when the time comes.

Cultural differences play a big role in how parents approach gifts and spending when it comes to kids, which is why it's ultimately up to the parent to decide if the child is mature enough to appreciate a BJD or another luxury item. The maturity level could be measured by ability to save, if parents choose to give allowance, or by willingness to help with the household, if parents choose to not pay kids for chores, or by some other measure entirely.

I wanted to point this out because not all parents who buy their children expensive toys without having the child save money do it because they are spoiling the child. Cultural and philosophical differences play a very big part in how people choose to parent.

On another note, I view being part of the BJD community and owning a BJD to be separate pursuits. A person can own a BJD, but not be part of the community/fandom. I feel that children (under 16 sounds about right) should be supervised very closely by their parents if the children would like to interact with the doll community. Financial transactions, doll meets, etc. should be monitored by the parents to avoid misunderstandings and other issues that come up in what is essentially a community comprised of mostly adults.

 

I to agree age does not always determine maturity. I have a younger sister who ever since she was around 11 started collecting things and some of them were pretty pricey. My mother gave her money to purchase these things and my sister took very good care of them. Displayed them nicely, kept them in great condition, whenever she handled them she was always careful she was also extremely cautious when other people held them. So I say 11 and older can own take care of pricey things even if they weren't the ones paying for it. Parents probably take in consideration if they're kid is old enough to handle something like that.

I use to be in a different doll community where a lot of ages were around and under 14. It kind of ruined that doll hobby for me because of how immature these people were. Some didn't take proper care of their dolls and did some damage to them but then again some were very mature and took excellent care of they're dolls. Not to mention some every now and than there were some adults in the mixture. Maybe it all depends on the way the person is rather than age.

 

I totally agree here. As a kid, I saved and saved for the things I wanted, unlike my sister, who would always see something and cave, leaving longer-term goals almost impossible to attain. I eventually saved for a few years to get my first BJD. Determination and shrewdness? I think I passed that test.

 

I think it all depends on the child in question and the finances of that child's family. If there was a mature 8-12-year-old girl whose parents were willing to buy her a doll that cost several hundred dollars, and if her parents had confidence that she would not treat the doll like any old children's doll (American Girl, My Twinn, Barbie, etc.), then I don't see what's wrong with getting her one. It would likely be her most treasured 'toy'. If the child were very spoilt and regularly demanded expensive items only to lose interest in a few weeks, then I would definitely not think it's a good idea to get her one.

If asked for advice, I would tell a young girl to only think about getting a BJD if her parents were all right with it or if she could (somehow remarkably) save up money to buy it herself. I would let her know that BJDs are not intended for children's use and are generally considered to be adult collectibles. Dragging the doll by its hair, drawing on it with marker, playing roughly with it outside, throwing it around, etc. would not be appropriate for such a valuable item. I would probably advise her to think of her doll as a friend to love and care for. I would also tell her about the individual natures of each customisable doll and would be curious to see if she had a personality concept in mind.

 

I guess we are looking more at the maturity of the children rather than the age here. Also knowing the real value of money would be handy. Looking at the example you gave us we can proabably see the child as one that proabably got whatever they wanted and would throw the doll away after they got bored with it. Children that know the true value of money will understand how much work and effort you have to put in JUST to buy the doll itself and would proabably treat it with respect and love. As someone who works. We could possibly count the doll in hours of work and see REALLY how long it takes to save up for something so expensive. So it proabably isnt the age issue, but the understading of buying and obtaining things.

 

I think that if a child shows the potential to be able to take care of a BJD by themselves, then they should have one if they really want one. My mom and her mother saved up all of their money in order to buy my mother a rather expensive doll when she was 12 and to this day (almost 50 years later) it's still in perfect condition. So, I believe that 12 year-olds do have the capacity to be very caring for a BJD.

 

My daughter wanted a bjd when she was 13 years old. I could really tell she wanted it badly. We bought her a relatively cheap doll and ever since she took good care of this. I guided her by seeking information and telling her how to take care of a resin doll. I knew she would. (for examlple: at the age of 3 she handeld tiny kittens with care)

 

My adoptive father gave me a machete in a beautiful leather sheath completely handmade by an indigenous tribesman he met while sailing the world when I was 2 months old. I wasn't allowed to handle it until I was older, of course, but to this day, I really love that machete.

If the parents feel it's an appropriate item for their child, I don't see how it's anyone's business if a child is given an expensive toy. Beyond the whole choking hazard issue, I suppose.

Now, if someone wants their child to be part of the BJD community and go to meets and interact with others, then I feel a bit differently, since owning a doll and being a part of the community are two entirely different things. A lot of children just not ready or mature enough to participate, and things like business transactions and leaving them at meetups can become really sticky situations extremely fast.

 

I agree with this so much. I'm not sure exactly where the 'you must save or you're a spoiled brat' came from, because items can have a lot of meaning because they are gifts. I have things that were given to me that I love not just because they are beautiful in their own right, but because when I look at them I also remember the loved one who gave it to me. Just because something was given as a gift doesn't mean that it is automatically less special or won't hold any meaning to the recipient.

As a child I saved up for some things and had parental help with others. As a young person I just didn't have the buying power that I do as an adult. When I was in highschool I did work, but it was at a local stable, and I wasn't payed with money. Instead I received things like extra riding lessons, show coaching, and other discounts on services. This was very helpful for a horse crazy kid and was a great way to learn about responsibility, but it wasn't a way to earn pocket money per say.

Another good point -- interacting with other people isn't the same as playing with your dolls buy yourself or with a few close friends. Being a minor creates legal obligations for the adults involved and can complicate meetup situations and transactions. That doesn't mean that minors shouldn't participate, but it does mean that the parents need to be aware and be a part of things too.

 

I know plenty of young adults (and those even younger) that are mature enough to take care of a doll. If their parents can trust them to take care of kittens and puppies, then why not a doll? The issue for me is the cost. I think the majority of bill should be paid by the person actually owning the doll; which would be the child. This would not only teach them about saving and earning money, but the value of it and the doll that they buy. I don't think it would be good for the parents to front the whole cost of the doll.

 

I'm 14 and I have bjds, I also have. Friend who is interested in getting into the hobby who is 11 and I think is very mature for her age and would be capable, however many children her age would simpl not be capable and wouldn't be all o take careof them.

 

Hm, I think the age is so relative...When I was 14 I totally falled in love with the BJD and I researched a lot! I knew it was a hard hobby. I think a 14 years old can take good care of a doll if he/she really get interested. (Of course he/she will need parents help to interact in social forums and buying/selling.)


What I think it's the real problem is the money. When you're 12 you usually don't have your own money, so it's hard to do the maintenance, the changes and everything else...it's a expensive hobby.


Then, just to close it (I'm talking too much xD) I think a kid can take care of a doll, but I don't think he/she'll be able to fully exercise the hobby.

 

What matters is whether you are responsible and mature enough to handle these dolls. You can be an immature/irresponsible 40 year old person or a very young person who knows how to take care of things.

If I ever have kids and I know they can take care of a doll, I will get them one.

 

I'm 15 and I started the hobby in 2010. I agree with many of these posts, that depending on the child and the responsibility he/she has it doesn't matter too much. Being a part of the community at a young age can be hard though because I've been to meets and I've been afraid to go sometimes in fear of being judged by my age.

Personally parental supervision is something I'd definitely recommend if the child was to attend a.meet because you never really know who your meeting online these days. so on this topic I'd say depending on the child's ability of responsibility and care, yeah he/she i'd say Is old enough.

 

I recently let a two year old play with my Littlefee...my Puki is too little and my MNF is too big but I felt the girl could handle Artemis and be okay. And she was...she was very careful with her and I didn't let her dress her but I let her pick out what she wanted Artemis to wear. The only problem I had was that the child misunderstood and thought she could KEEP my girl but her mom helped me with that one (gotta learn about sharing!). If the girl was a rowdy child I would never have let her touch my doll.

 

It just depends on how careful and responsible they are. Age is not so important, but maturity is!

 

I am 15 almost 16. But I got my first doll right around 15 and a half. I started looking at dolls when I was 13, but knew at that age I wouldnt be suitable to own one just yet. I agree that age doesn't always gage maturity correctly, but it's also up to the person buying it. I didn't want to buy a doll that I couldnt take care of so I waited until I felt I was ready. Its really up to the person buying it.. But they should still do TONS of research beforehand.