Too young for the hobby?

I'm 13, so I am pretty young and also fairly new to the dolly hobby. Just because a person say 12 doesn't always mean that they wouldn't be a good doll owner, actually most girls at that age are very mature. Now thats just with girls. If it was a boy then I probably would think alittle differently because well most boys just are not very mature at such a young age and probably wouldn't be able to. Now please do not hate on me because I don't think a young boy should have a BJD because I am actually a guy myself. But in my opinion there's not an age requirement to own a BJD it just really depends on how responsible you would be with it. It's not my money and I can't tell anyone what to do with their own but a tip of advice from me is if your younger and you want to be in the BJD hobby just buy a cheaper doll and see how you do. If you think your ready to take on a more expensive doll then so be it.

 

I think this definatly depends on the person. I know if I myself had kids I would be bringing them up around my own dolls and that would im sure allow them to have a good understanding of how to treat a doll like a bjd. However the thought of parents to whome money is no object buying there smaller children dolls like this makes me very sad inside. I know that some people are responsible and mature from a younger age as I know I was but most arnt. I hate to think of beautiful dolls which I would love to have in my collection are been taken for granted. Maybe its partly envy...but il admit to that

 

I do my best not to be judgmental, and my issue is not "how young is the kid?", because I have over a dozen younger cousins and know very well that it is extremely individual how mature they are, and how well they'd be able to take care of something this expensive. My issue is the parents, and as you said, if that mother actually knew what she was getting into. If she was willing to buy such an expensive present because she trusts her child or because she was willing to buy it just because the kid wanted it. I won't get into that too much, because I realize it's not what this discussion is about, I just wanted to clarify my thinking.

 

My mum let me have one of her porcelain dolls when I was 6 and specified things, like where Anita should go once I was finished with her etc. I was told she couldn't go upstairs with me...... I lost interest when I was 9 and my mum sold Anita later to buy a new computer, but Anita was still in good shape, but I was fairly careful with my books and toys as a child. My elder sister was also fairly careful, but of my 2 younger sisters, I wouldn't trust even the 15 year old one with an expensive doll as she can be careless where she leaves expensive items.

 

For me I'd less concerned about the age of the person but the ability to handle the matenince and the ability to have a clear understanding about the various aspects of this hobby that aren't always obvious. For example restringing can sometimes be a difficult task even for an adult or how to fix things when they break or how to make sure your doll doesn't yellow.

 

Like many here, I know some kids that are very careful with their things and some adults that are much more careless. I think what it comes down to is the individual child, and a mother that is willing to buy such an expensive doll for her child knows that kid better than anyone else does and therefore either has enough money that she doesn't care what happens to the doll, or she knows that her child will take good care of it. At the end of the day it's the mother's decision whether or not to let her child have a BJD. And if the kid is a good owner, then that's one more person to enjoy the hobby!

 

I was one of those children that understood the value of an object (price and sentimental) and always treated my things (as well as other's) with respect. The majority of my childhood toys are still in extremely good condition. In fact, I've sold most of what didn't hold any sentimental value to adult collectors. My brother, on the other hand, is the complete and utter opposite. He was really into these pellet guns, bought his first one at 12 years old and broke it seconds after removing it from the box. Even two children that grew up in the same household can be totally different when it comes down to it, and that's where it's up to the parent's judgement when it comes to determining if the child is mature enough or not.

 

Big ol' shrug here. Depends on the 12-year old. If they don't know how to take care of it properly and they ruin it, they've ruined an expensive resin toy. If the kid's mom is comfortable dropping $500, potentially down the drain, on that, okay. And maybe the kid is mature enough to handle it.

I seriously doubt if it happens often enough to even be concerned about. I save my fretting about ill-informed purchases for things like live animals--I'd rather a kid have a $500 resin doll to ruin than a $7 betta fish they aren't caring for properly, and the latter is much more common.

 

I'm thirteen and have always been very mature for my age. My long time BFF however is crazy! When we were younger she was the type of kid who colored on her dolls and bit off their hands and noses. I however couldn't even fathom doing that when I was little. I've helped out with all sorts of ages with kids and I'd have to say that you can't really put an age limite on a bjd, whether or not the kid should get a doll like that should be based on the kid's maturity.

 

Well, if you can talk to the parents about it, you might want to mention that 99percent of the dolls are anatomically correct. In EVERY sense of the word. When I've told people that before, they tend to think, "Oh, so they're just very lifelike!" "No! I mean, ANATOMICALLY correct." "Oh--you don't mean they have-?" "Yes." Panic then ensues. So unless the parents are ok with their sweet little 12-year-old playing with a boy who has...you know...then BJDs are definitely out of the question. And as far as being able to take care of them I would think about 90percent of 12-year-olds would simply not be able to appreciate a BJD. That isn't to say they can't have one, but the thought of a lovely doll suffering ill-treatment from someone at any age is painful.

 

Age is arbitrary, and every person is different with how they grow at each age. I know plenty of 12 year olds who are responsible enough for dolls. I also find that BJDs are not as fragile as many believe. I don't see anything wrong with younger people having dolls of their own, and feel like everyone deserves a hobby. And of course, why should I care what other people do with their money? You know, those young ladies may learn the importance of taking care of their things, and the wonders of working hard for nice stuff. Who am I to discriminate against potential doll-lovers that could have a lot to contribute to the hobby or have a wonderful opportunity to grow through owning a doll merely because they are "young"?

 

I believe it all depends on the child. Some can handle it some can't, but as far as money goes, I wouldn't complain about that since these games systems that get bought for a child cost just as much when you include games, controllers, and whatever else, sometimes the cost even more depending.

 

I was wondering what people thought about young bjd collectors, being as I am one. I would love to go to a doll meet, BUT i'm afraid people would think that i'm waiting for my mom, when realistically I'm there trying to make friends. I'm 14. I'm also so bad a making friends, I have social anxiety, and I could not keep a conversation for more then 2 sentences. I don't know. What do you think about young collectors ?

 

As long as a person can conduct themselves responsibly (ie, no random screaming, no touching people/dolls without permission), it doesn't matter what age you are. We have a newcomer to our local group that's even younger than you and it's all fine. Some groups have age restrictions only because the venue has rules about minors though, but that's not too typical.

As for the social anxiety, I don't have any advice... I have some of that too... but the cool thing about doll meets is that you already know what you have in common with the others there. You don't need to think hard about what to talk about to start or join a conversation~ "I like your doll" or "what sculpt is that?" can launch an entire conversation because who doesn't like talking about their dolls, right?

 

I truly wouldn't worry about being looked down upon! Your presentation is more important than your age. People might be uncomfortable around younger collectors, because these dolls are expensive and fragile, but if you're mature and fully understand the etiquette of going to a meetup (don't touch dolls without permission, don't be rude ect) then you'll surely fit in.

I understand the social anxiety to an extent, as I have mild anxiety now and when I was younger it took years for me to spend time with total strangers without feeling stupid or embarrassed simply for existing as a person. I couldn't even pay for things at the register by myself! I'm no expert on social anxiety at all, but the thing that helped me was forcing myself to start conversations. It's not hard! Just bring up something doll-related as said by Aikohaku and that will get the ball rolling. Bring up your personal experiences a collector. Talk about something your working on, or something about your doll's character. You're at a doll meet, filled with people looking to talk about something they don't normally get to discuss at length in public. Start something small and it will easily roll into a group discussion, which will get you interacting with the other collectors and in turn, get you more comfortable with them.


However, I'm not an expert at doll-meetups. My resins have never left my house and they never will as far as I'm concerned, and since I now work from home I find myself going back to my hermit-habits and I rarely talk to people as it is!

 

I think it's fine that younger people are in the hobby unless they're a little too young and don't understand the value. 14 is a good age, thats when I got into the hobby. Me personally, I don't want too many younger friends. I think it's a little odd when an adult has children for friends. I'll talk to you every now and then, answer some questions, but friends? I'm not too sure about that.

 

I have no problem with younger collectors, if they're mature and polite. One of my local friends has a 12 year old son in the hobby, and he's every bit as respectful of others as every adult at our meets.

My only concern about younger people at meets is that I usually request they bring an adult with them if I'm hosting. Your parent, aunt, uncle, grandma, doesn't really matter to me, but it helps put everyone at ease. It helps older collectors who might be nervous about younger people feel that they aren't being forced to babysit, and that if anything did go wrong (say the teen accidentally broke a doll or something) there is an adult there to take the responsibility. It can be helpful to the younger member as well, because you're not walking into a room full of adult strangers you've never laid eyes on, and if you do feel uncomfortable for any reason, you have someone at your side to leave with you immediately. I can thankfully say in the 5+ years I've been going to meets, I've never seen anyone damage anyone else's doll, and I've never seen anyone be hateful or start drama, or discriminate based on age. I've met doll owners from age 11 up to early 70s, and generally, people are pretty respectful. Even if your entire lifestyle and personality is different, you can still connect over dolls. If you're shy, it's easiest to just ask someone open ended questions about their dolls. Here's a few for starts:

-"Does your doll have a character? What are they like?"

-"What sculpt is that? What made you decide that was the one?"

-"Did you paint/sew for her yourself?"

-"How long have you been in the hobby?"

-"How many dolls do you own? Do you have future plans?"

-"What inspired your doll's style?"

Most of these can start a pretty good discussion! And if you aren't much of a talker, that's okay! It gives the talkers a chance to share about their dolls without interruption!

 

-shrugs- depends on the kid...rather, person I should say.
I've been tinkering with expensive machinery long before I hit puberty, I don't see why that would be any different for expensive dolls. Meanwhile I know a couple adults who shouldn't be trusted with anything more fragile than a pile of rocks. And even then I'd be concerned they might find a way to break them.

I guess the generation gap may make things a bit awkward at first. But that's no reason they shouldn't partake in the hobby. Better awkwardness than regret after all.

 

Honestly i could not relate to you more. I just turned 15 and am about to buy my first doll. I have this constant fear of being in the hobby and being looked down upon because im rather young , not to mention my social anxiety makes the thought of attending a meet rather stressful. Its nice to see someone who feels the same way as me !

 

Im currently 20 but started looking when I was 17. I have two younger cousins who are 8 and 11 and want one. Their dad said no since they can barely take care of their phones let alone an expensive doll. I think about 14-15 is the age a child would be able to take care of something like that.