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What do you do with a doll when you're not bonding?

Apr 7, 2017

    1. What do you do when a doll you bought doesn't work for you? I mean when you like the sculpt from the photos and then it arrives and it's different from what you have imagined. Your simply don't bond.
      Do you try buying another and reshell the character? Or try hard to make it work with different wigs/eyes/faceup? Ty modding it? Or just sell the doll and completely forget about the character?
      I bought a head and I wasn't 100% sure about the sculpt. Sometimes it's hard to tell from photos. I created a character around it and was pretty excited but I'm still not feeling it even after some modding and a faceup. :(
    2. Hi @Sonik

      I don't think you should sell the doll and scrap the character unless it's the character you are unable to bond with!
      However, if it's only the sculpt, perhaps selling it is a better option. Have you considered shelling a new character into the current sculpt? I've done that with sculpts I struggled to bond with but didn't want to sell.
      Personally, I would reshell the current character and shell a new one into the sculpt I struggle bonding with.
    3. i'm probably one of the few people who has never and would never sell a doll if i wasn't bonding (or for any other reason, actually), although i have considered it. that's just my personal choice though. i would just feel too bad and tbh there's always /something/ or other i can do with a doll for myself..!

      i have done what @A_Grand_Leaf has suggested and just... waited until something else comes to me for that sculpt..! but it's really your choice. if you end up just getting sick of looking at the doll and having it around makes you feel bad, perhaps it would be best to sell it.
      changing eyes and wigs and faceups might help! if you're capable, try drawing out some designs, or photoshopping different eyes in, or using a dress up website for a little inspiration! tbh i have a lot of fun doing that, haha...

      when i messed up my second doll's faceup, i just couldn't stand to look at it anymore, i was so sad. even after i tried fixing it, it just wasn't working. the default faceup was too perfect for it. so i wiped the faceup and tried something new, as a different character, and i ended up loving that one too! i recently wiped her and am planning on re-doing the faceup with a little more skill this time. the design fits great, i just need to improve my technique. ^^
      i actually have ordered a second one of that sculpt with the default face up, here's hoping it goes better this time. x__X;;

      i also almost never scrap characters, even if i never do anything with them, and that's why i have.... literally over a hundred characters LOL. i guess you could say i'm kind of a hoarder in that regard. x__x;
      • x 5
    4. I totally feel you man LOL! Sometimes, you love a doll soooo much based on the company's photos but when it come, it's just somehow.... different.

      I once bought a tiny planning to make him the brother of one of my other tiny and I even bought matching outfits and all, but things didn't turn out like I planned and they just didn't... go well together. I ended up giving both dolls new characters and reshelling the brothers into two other different dolls and until now all of them are still with me. :)

      I've rehomed two tinies so far, and that was only because they still didn't/couldn't fit into the harem family despite repeated attempts to make them work (like giving them different faceups, wardrobe overhaul, different styling, even new names and characters and all). Maybe it was my lack of skill to bring out the best in them, but maybe... just maybe, we were not meant to be :(

      I don't think you need to resort to giving up your character though, it just mean you haven't come across the perfect sculpt yet! Even for a couple of my characters I'm still on the hunt for that "perfect" one. Just take your time for the right one to come along! :)

      And if you like the current head sculpt a lot, you can try giving it a different character with different faceup or wig and see if it works? You never know if the new look might just click. You won't have to sell the head if that happens! Although sometimes disappointment might get in the way of you bonding with the new character if you are still feeling bummed about it not working for the intended character, especially if you were so excited about it before. :( But, I think it doesn't hurt to give it a second chance. :)

      Good luck! :kitty2
    5. What I actually do is put them out of sight for a while so that I can have time to think it over. Sometimes I come up with an idea while they're put away, or sometimes I don't come up with an idea, but I eventually take them out again (months or a year later) and suddenly they have the exciting appeal of a new doll. At that point I'm often able to have a little fun with them.

      I've been disappointed by dolls upon arrival before, where something about them wasn't what I was expecting. That can be harder to bounce back from, I don't know if I've ever grown to love a doll I felt any dislike for the moment I opened them up. But dolls I felt kind of neutral about I've been able to eventually make into someone I really like.

      If the problem doll was for an important character I usually try to find a better sculpt for the character, but I do try to do something with the problem doll just in case they can turn out to be awesome. In the end, if it doesn't feel right I do sell the doll. I have sold plenty of dolls over time but I always try to give myself plenty of time to think it over before I do. I try to make sure I'm really done with the sculpt and sometimes that means I keep them in a box for a few years thinking it over. Anyway, I think it would be normal not to be as patient as me. I really hope you will find what works for you in this situation. :hug:
      • x 1
    6. This is always my nightmare, spending 6-1000 USD on a doll that didn't turn out as expected.. When I do research on dolls, I always search for customer pictures, cause many of the Company pictures are studio pictures, which have been processed before publishing, I never expect my dolls to look exactly the same as the studio pictures. And that's a shame, but it seems that it's the correct marketing, cause every commercial brand do the same, whatever products we're buying today. Every brand is visually manipulated during its marketing process.

      If I buy a doll, which didn't live up to my expectations, I see four options; Sell the complete doll, sell the head, get a custom faceup or try to find a new outfit that would fit the sculpt better. To sell the doll is always my last option. Cause sometimes one can use the body for another head, if the color match (color can also be blushed to match the body), or one can do a custom faceup, which could change the whole appearance, but the sculpt would still be the same.

      Until now, I have been lucky, but I have one sculpt that didn't fit my characters outfit as I expected, Soom Topaz. I still hold on to her, cause there might be some outfit, waiting for me out there, that could do the trick. I just need to be patient...
    7. I love these suggestions, as I do have a doll I haven't quite bonded with yet. It's sad ...but I like the idea of putting it out of sight for a while. Perhaps something will come to me and I just haven't envisioned what sort of character I want out of it just yet. I'm sure it's just a matter of the inspiration not being there, at the moment.
    8. I'll try a new wig, different eyes, different clothes, maybe a new fave up. But, honestly, I rarely end up falling in love with something I have that much trouble with. So, I find them a new home. I don't see the sense I'm keeping something I don't adore. (For me personally. Whatever others want to do with their stuff is their own thing.) I really hate clutter at my own house, and anything I don't love is clutter.
    9. I'm sorry to hear that you're having trouble bonding with your doll, @Sonik -- that can be really distressing and honestly I feel like worrying about it kind of gets in the way of any dedicated attempts to bond after you figure out you're having a problem. Kind of like when you show a friend your favorite movie (or other piece of media) and you're constantly watching them for a good response to see if they like it as much as you do-- you're so intent on seeing some sort of spark that you can't enjoy the activity in and of itself.

      For some reason a lot of my bonding with my dolls takes place while i'm doing really mundane stuff like brushing out and styling their wigs. I usually sit them down in my lap and just slowly comb everything out. Maybe it's just because it's sort of mindless and calming?

      I agree with everything that's been said so far in regards to new faceups helping bonding as well-- so far all of my girls (with the exception of the most recent to arrive; Eiko and Fuyumi) have custom faceups that were done by me. It's really interesting to see some of the personality take shape as you go along and I think it can bring you closer to them. Making clothes or props for my girls also helps, too.

      @AlisonVonderland , this is a great idea and one I've never considered. If I end up having trouble bonding with a doll in the future, I might just try this.
    10. @A_Grand_Leaf @mangameow @Galileo @TomDavy @chipinique @bluepita @casheye
      Thank you so much for all your kind words and suggestions. I really helped me to make up my mind. :hug:
      Actually just now new Makoeyes came and it doesn't make much difference for me, I'm still not fond of this guy. So I decided to put him back in a box and concentrate on my other two dolls for a while. I think part of the problem is that I'm fairly new to the hobby and still not sure what I'm looking for with dolls. And he just doesn't fit my other two dolls because he's more realistic while my other two are more stylized. Maybe my preference of more stylized dolls will change over time. So I'll keep him in a box for a while and then have a plan of either reshelling the character in another sculpt or maybe I'll start liking him.
      • x 3
    11. I do as mentioned by a few others: Try different looks different faceups, styling or new wigs (you can often test new looks at a doll meet or doll fair where you can try on wigs or eyes to see before perhaps buying), or put it away for a while to take some time apart from the concept and come back to it fresh. If after all that, it does nothing for me, I might then sell it.
    12. This is going to sound a bit weird, but;
      Take it apart completely and spend time cleaning each individual piece with warm, soapy water. Go slowly and take in all the details of the sculpting, including the limbs and the joints. (Optional: wipe the faceup). Then towel dry each piece and lay out all the pieces on another dry towel to let the elastic channels dry as well. Then restring the doll and start fresh.

      By now the doll will be subconsciously very familiar to you and therefore more appealing than it was previously. WAIT---I mean---it's totally a secret magical dolly bonding ritual, tee hee. ♡
      • x 6
    13. It depends.

      If it's just a little bit off, I'll try faceups and wigs and eyes and try to make it work, but if it's extremely wrong, then I might try using it as a different character or selling/trading it. It's upsetting to save up and wait for months for a doll you don't like, and I see nothing wrong with moving it along to someone else so you can get something you really do like.
      • x 1
    14. There was one doll that was on my wishlist quite a while, but I bought her before I had actually planned to and on short notice because the company suddenly announced that it was going out of business. When she arrived she posed horridly, has a hard-to-fit head for wigs and since I wasn't really prepared for her, (no character or story at all and no plans for her styling yet) I did not really reach for her or even feel like painting her.
      Since I have other dolls, it wasn't really an issue. I just kept her and after a while I warmed up to her. I've gotten her some kips and one wig that at least fits and so in the end I was really glad I didn't sell her. She fits in well with 2 of my other dolls and now I'm looking forward to styling her. That said, if I had remained disinterested in her, I'd have sold her and gotten another girl, no regrets.
      • x 1
    15. It really depends on the situation. I usually try changing around wigs, eyes, and maybe giving them a new faceup; if that doesn't work I'll usually put them away in their box for a while and see what I think about not having them around. I generally end up selling dolls that I don't click with, but if their character is important to me, I reshell or plan to reshell them :)
      • x 1
    16. I actually realized I didnt like the sculpt before she even made it home! Ive tried a few ways to bond with her more, but I think i might sell her and save for one Im sure I like.
      • x 1
    17. I've decided to sell the very first BJD I bought. She's just too big. After collecting for a few years I've realized I don't like the larger dolls. I don't feel bad about selling her. Hopefully someone else will be able to appreciate her. I also have a couple of other dolls that I bought blank and did the face-ups on them. After finishing them and adding eyes and wigs, I don't like the way they look, so I'll try redoing the face-ups. If I can't get them to where I like them, I'll sell them too.
    18. I usually put it away in a closet for a year and see if I feel differently in the future. Of course the problem with that is that I sometimes forget about the doll and realize after 6 years that I still have this doll (or head) that I've done nothing with, so maybe it's not the best idea! ;)
    19. Maybe I'm odd, but... after the initial disappointment of figuring out a doll won't work for the planned character, I actually get very excited about it. Usually, when that happens, I get to go through a lot of fun character making and world building and all that fun stuff. Many of my writing projects stem from dolls making up new characters. Right now, I'm halfway through drafting a trilogy that wouldn't have existed if a new sculpt hadn't come out that worked better for a character than his original doll, allowing the original doll to be remade into someone completely new :)

      One time, however, I did end up selling a doll that I just couldn't bond with. It may have been influenced by circumstance, as I did end up having to leave her in her box in pieces for a long time while I sent her upper torso back to the company for a fix. After getting her back together, I tried to play and do photos and change up her looks, but nothing helped. I ended up packing her away in her box out of sight, with the mindset of "if I miss her I can bring her back out and keep trying, but if a month passes and I don't feel anything, it's time to sell."
    20. Sadly, this has happened to me before as well. What I usually try is to change clothes for a while and the wigs and such. Also, I try to spend some time with that specific doll. Although it usually does not work so I end up selling. That way someone else can enjoy the doll instead of me owning it as a frustration :(