When people tell you your dolls are a waste of money...

Being in college, sometimes my peers judge me for having expensive dolls because "aren't you on a college budget?!" I am, but I don't impulse buy my dolls. I save, pay bills and tuition first, and I don't eat out, drink, or spend a lot of money on other hobbies (outside of art supplies (rip my wallet but I need more paint)). So, I have money left over to treat myself once in a while.

Other than that, this hobby isn't really that much more expensive than other hobbies. For instance, if you're into art, decent supplies is going to run you a lot. Nice, decent sized canvases can start at about $15 for just one, and nice brushes can be $3-$7 a pop. But it's worth to pay more for quality in my opinion, which is why I'm willing to pay more for bjds since you get what you pay for.

 

I think that's something people miss. Because a lot of people buy inexpensive things on impulse, they assume that almost everything aside from necessities is done that way. Dolls are expensive and an impulse buy that goes into hundreds of dollars raises eyebrows. Somehow, people forget that saving money for long term wants is a thing that hobbyists do.

 

I've reached the point where most people in my life who are aware of my collection are in the "live and let live" camp, so I don't get these kinds of comments frequently anymore. That said, I'm now hardcore ascribing to the Konmari method - they spark joy, and as long as I'm not causing myself/my husband/my child to struggle or go without in order to afford it (and I'm definitely not!), then it shouldn't be any of their concern.

 

As long as I have no family (kids, spouse) and I spend my own hard-earned money on dolls, it will work the following way: when people tell me my dolls are a waste of money they will get out of my eye line as any hobby is a waste of money and if they judge me for having a hobby it means they don't have any and I don't want to be friends with them anymore.

Having common expenses in case of being married/having kids, etc certainly may bring the question of "wasting" money up depending on the financial state of the family.

 

I fortunately haven’t dealt with any “waste of money” comments. I got my first doll as a Christmas gift from my mom when I was in college, so she was cool with the price tag.

I didn’t buy my other dolls until after I’d graduated college, gotten a job, and moved out. I was extremely careful about spending money on luxury things until I felt financially stable. I would’ve felt guilty buying an expensive doll if I had been still relying on my parents for financial support.

Nowadays, my husband and I keep track of our monthly budgets, saving goals, and fun money allowances, so I have no worries about spending too much on my dolls. My husband has spent way more on his hobbies than me! lol.

 

If you're using your money to buy something that brings you happiness and fulfillment, I'd say that's the exact opposite of wasting it. Sure, you should take a step back if the spending becomes unhealthy and impacts your life in a negative way, but otherwise, it's your money to spend as you please and that's nobody's business but your own.

Everybody has things in life that, despite not being essential to live, make them happy and so they're willing to prioritize their spending on it. So I don't see the point of anybody judging me for "wasting" money on dolls, because they most likely indulge on something equally as frivolous. For example, I hate spending too much on consumable things like food or alcohol. It just seems more practical to use my money to buy something I can enjoy day after day (like dolls!), instead of something that will disappear quickly. But not everyone feels the same as me; my sister, for example, is someone who loves to eat out at restaurants, and that's something she budgets for since she spends a lot on it. Yeah, it seems rather pointless to me, but it's her money and her life, so who am I to say that what she's doing is bad or wrong?

It really just boils down to what people think is socially acceptable to spend money on, honestly, which annoys me. If all my doll money was used for something more conventional like designer bags or makeup, most people wouldn't bat an eyelash. You could argue those things are more practical than dolls because they can be used in daily life, but if you collect things like that, you can't possibly use them all (and may not even want to, I mean, I wouldn't wanna use a $2000+ purse where it'll get all beat up and possibly even stolen). Most makeup enthusiasts I've seen own more products than they'll ever be able to even use, so a lot of it will just sit in a drawer or on a table looking pretty...kinda like dolls, right?

Anyway, if someone wants to think I'm wasting my money in this hobby then so be it. I'll keep on wasting my money and they can die mad about it.

 

I always tell, that it is my own hobby, my own money and I can decide myself)
But my mom doesn't know how much I spend on dolls...even now)

 

This always makes me laugh because EVERY person who has ever made a comment about what my dolls cost has SOMETHING they "waste" money on. They don't value what I spend my money on, so they judge it, and I have pointed out to them things they "waste" their money on that I don't. That generally shuts them up, because there are so many things that other people spend money on that I don't.
All that said, most people in my life don't give me any crap about my dolls because I have always had dolls, the few people that have tend to be hypocritical, smug, and judgemental to begin with so I really don't care what they think in any case.

 

I was pretty decided I would buy a BJD and my mom told me that it´s my descision what I do with my money and to buy one if I really want her (yes, she´s great), but my brother laughed me off and told me that I can´t make intelligent financial descisions. It really gave me a hard time and now I´m not sure whether or not should I buy the doll.

 

If all your necessities are taken care of and spending money on a doll won't put you in debt don't let your brother or anyone else's opinion stop you from it. The doll isn't for them so they shouldn't have any say on whether or not you buy it. Do what makes you happy, because your happiness is just as important as any one else's.

 

I don't share my dolls with anyone. Also if they asked I would give a vague answer regarding price. "A good amount but I love her" something along those lines. As you get older that question will be asked less often

 

Thank you! That´s really nice. You have a point, I shouldn´t let my brother to spoil my joy. I worked hard to make that money and I did it for myself. So I can spend on whatever I want, can´t I?

 

@Aikaa : As someone who also has a brother who should be minding his own business and stop looking down on other people: if you have taken care of your other financial responsibilities, shouldn't you do what you wish with the excess? I am not sure about what would be an intelligent financial decision for your brother, but it is IMO not futile to invest in your well-being. While money should not be spent carelessly, it is made to be spent after all.