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Your dolls after your death...

Jan 26, 2018

    1. Well never really thought about it deeply, but what'd want (plan) for them is, to end up in best scenario case to be loved by my family (daughter etc.) keep them as a reminder of me and then go on their journey until infinity. I want them to last long and be there as a heirloom tbh.

      In the worse scenario case, if they'd be sold. I'd haunt them and scared the Sh*t out of the people who take them in if, they miss treat my babies LOL.

      But no jokes now, if my family decide to sell them then so be it. Although i'd rather prefer to burry them with me.
       
    2. Great topic - I'm older than almost anyone here, I think - 71 this week - and even though I'm relatively healthy and don't expect to die soon, I desperately need to downsize because I have an obsessively over-large collection that overwhelms me and will absolutely overwhelm my husband and children - who know nothing about dolls and could care less. If I'd thought about these things 30 years ago, which I did not, I would have kept far better records. That's one of the reasons I have been and will be posting questions here - I mixed and matched heads and bodies and rarely wrote it down, so frequently I need help identifying what is what (not to mention recognizing faces - I think I have that disease that impairs facial recognition. I'm terrible at it.) I don't think I own any recasts, since I usually bought directly from companies or reputable dealers, but it would be a challenge matching up certificates to the right doll because they're not in English and that's all I can read. And although I don't remember discarding any boxes, some have vanished over the years - it's really going to be a terrible mess. I think I'm the only one likely to come close to unraveling it by poring through my files, asking people on this board questions etc. Bottom line, my plan is to sell as many as I possibly can so no one else has to deal with it. It's not about the money, it's the need to re-home the dolls. I'm that way about everything, even books. I want them to go to somebody who wants them, not end up in a recycling bin. Too much emotion invested in inanimate objects - but especially dolls, particularly BJDs. I don't like thinking about this but it's a necessity - and a great topic - because I figure even if I work tirelessly at getting rid of my stuff, it's a 10 year project (minimum) - so I'd better not get hit by a bus tomorrow.
       
      • x 6
    3. @SKYWHYS You've summed up exactly how I feel. I'm 65 and not only do I have the BJDs but I have many other types of dolls too, not to mention dolls houses (seventeen at the last count), model farms and stables and so on. I have kept a spreadsheet of the BJDs for many years, so that's a help, but I need to up my game.

      I've started a folder on my laptop called Departure Zone and left it in the centre of my desktop where my family are sure to see it. (And backed it up to my portable hard drive and magneted a note to the fridge!). In that folder I've begun with a photo list of my most treasured items for them to choose which they'd like to keep in memory of me. Next I made a Bequest List of what I would like to gift to my friends in the doll world, including their contact info. That bit is great, you can have all the fun of being generous without actually having to part with anything.

      Now I'm on with the long term task of getting each doll into the original outfit and box, locating the certificate and giving it a label. Then logging it all on databases with all info, photos and current location in the house and the recommended place to try selling it. I'm not ready to sell anything yet but at least if I get this finished it will make the job easier for my daughters and be a little earner for them.

      So yeah, I need to avoid those buses for a good while too.
       
      • x 3
    4. I have a chronic health condition so I have thought about this extensively. Although I do not have any dolls in my possession currently (fingers crossed that I will soon… I am shopping about) I can answer this with some relevance as I do have other collections that are worth a significant amount.

      In my house is a black safe with a key. The safe is fire/water proof and only a select few people have the key… people who I know are responsible and have my and my family’s best interests at heart. The safe contains all important documents needed for someone to take over responsibility for my affairs and life in case something was to ever happen to me both timely and untimely. So it contains anything from car & motorcycle paperwork all the way to birth certificates down to a living will and even pass codes into the computer and all social media, emails and forums that I have maintained online presence in over the years to notify whomever needs to be notified and so that eventually they could close the accounts.

      Inside that safe is also a section dedicated to each of our relevant hobbies and or collections that have physical items for them for all adults in the home.

      In each hobbies section it contains certificates of authenticity, original paperwork if we have them, names/contact information of any person(s) who have been willed the item, purchase information and or purchase agreements for documentations sake, list of identifiable features with pictures detailing the front/back/sides of said item, list of accessories or relevant parts (such as in the case of my violin for example: what case/string brand I had been using/bow go with it), year/make/model of item and a list of special instructions for care after my departure (like don’t leave in sunlight or make sure you place humidifier in guitar sound hole in winter to prevent damage) and a list of the original price, places that the item can be sold for the most value (in case the item is to be sold or the person who is willed the item does not want it) and a list of places to start the process of finding the item’s current value if necessary.

      I update the information as needed: so if an item yellows with age I put that and update the pictures on the page that has pictures, if I repaint/customize an item I put that information along with original color and pictures of both if possible (unless purchased painted a color different from original), if damage occurs I list that and how to prevent further damage etc.

      If the item is sold, I remove the paperwork that did not go with the item and shred it as I do with all sensitive information that comes into my home that I no longer need.

      If something happens and I am incapacitated or deceased my partner knows what to do and the select few who have a key to the safe. They are aware that they can keep whatever they wish and that they can sell what they wish when they are ready unless the item has been listed in the living will as willed to someone specifically. My daughter is still a child. When she turns 18 and if I am still around (probably will be but you never know) I will update the information accordingly. As of right now any items I have willed to her will be given to her when she is at an age to be able to care for them (right now at 7 she is not). She will receive a key to the safe when she is 18 or if at 18 we determine she is not responsible to access the documents, we will wait until we can determine that she can handle the information the safe contains in an adult like manner (personally I was not responsible at 18).

      Eventually I would like to digitally backup all documents however right now this is what we do. I hope this helps in some way!
       
      • x 3
    5. I have already said that the day I die I want specific things, maybe I am very demanding but if I die young at least I hope that these decisions are respected by my family and friends.

      I told my family and my boyfriend what I want to happen with all my bjds, I have been living with my boyfriend for 6 years and I told him that the day I die I want him to give all my dolls to my best friend

      I know that with her they will be happy and that she will give them love, I also told her that my dolls will be hers but she doesn't have to keep them, if she wants to sell them that's fine, if they make her happy and she wants them that's fine too, she will have the right to decide what to do with them as if it were me.

      ;)
       
    6. :aeyepop:WOW @GothPonyDoll! I'm impressed :thumbup

      At (a very young) 60,:lol: I'm not quite at the age where I need to really plan out who gets what, but I'm getting there.

      Also, with the pandemic still around, even though I'm vaxxed and boosted, death is something that should be planned for. It would be one less thing for my partner and family to worry about should I get hit by that bus. :sweat:3nodding:

      I've decided that this year, I'm going to start doing End-of-life planning. Right now, with only 27 dolls and one on the way, I'm definitely not rich, but I'd like to know should something happen to me, My Crew will be taken care of, along with anything else I have that may be of value. Like I mentioned in this post, I have grandkids. By pre-planning what to do with all the stuff I collect, My partner, my kid and grandkids will all know what to do with it all. :lol:

      I should do something similar to what you have done, @GothPonyDoll, a safe with everything of importance in it so that my family knows what to do with my BJDs and anything else I have that may be worth something.

      I do have a notebook with all of my BJDs' info in it, as well as their pics on flickr, so that's a start. I think its time I print out pics of each of my dolls and attach them to the detail page I have in that notebook for each doll.

      So much to do to plan "for the inevitable." *_*

      Ryu
       
      #126 Ryuichi Sakuma 13, Mar 30, 2022
      Last edited: Mar 31, 2022
      • x 1
    7. This isn't something I've thought about since I haven't been collecting long but I don't really have anyone to give them to as there isn't anyone I know nearby that's in the BJD hobby. It's kinda unsettling to think about them being junked or broken or just thrown away but I feel that way for all of my fandom merch.
       
      • x 1
    8. I've thought about it for some time now. I have attachment issues with some of the things I own so it really worries me to think what will happen with all those things I have loved so much when I'm not here.
      My husband and I do not wish to have kids so there would be no one to inherit our things. We have already collected a bunch of things in our still short lives (I'm 30 this year and he's 35) like books, comics, dolls, legos... and I'm sure our collections are far from complete, with new things being released every year.
      We've sometimes talked about selling everything when we become older so we can gather money to travel and spend our last years in a nursing home, being properly taken care of but that seems so far away I'm not truly convinced.
      At least, it is very relieving to see that I'm not the only one worried about this issue.
       
      • x 2
    9. First, I am extremely sorry for all of the no doubt incredibly stressful things you and your family have gone through as a result of the accident, and I am glad to hear that he ended up alright!
      For me personally, I don't care much what happens to anything in my care that isn't alive (i.e. pets), but that varies pretty drastically from person to person. If I were to have the chance to write a will beforehand, I'd likely give them to my sibling, who is also into the hobby.
       
    10. I feel the same as @rollcakes, I really don't care what happens to them after I die. I feel the same with my body too. I'll be dead so I it doesn't really matter to me lmao
       
      • x 1
    11. I used to want to be buried with my dolls when I was younger:XD:.

      Since I have changed my mind I actually had to ask my SO what he would do with my dolls if I died and he said he would ask my bestie if she would want them, which is surprisingly smart!

      Both of them know that they are expensive so they know not to just toss them (at least I hope so!), but my bestie might also just want to keep them as she also collects dolls.

      I don't have and can't have children (don't even want them so no need to feel sorry for me), so theres no one to inherit my things, which is why it falls to my SO or best friend.

      If they were to pass before me it would fall to my siblings to deal with my stuff and I have no idea what they would do... Maybe I need to write a will after all :sweat.
       
      • x 1
    12. Honestly? They'd probably go to my mother who'd sell them on Facebook. They're not my biggest concern when it comes to me dying. :sweat
       
    13. Honestly I dont care much. Because Id be dead
      If they are sold I hope my family will value them well atleast so they can enjoy the money
       
      • x 1
    14. I know my family would take care of my collections with care, so what happens after I die doesn't concern me too much. I would want my collections to go to people who would appreciate them, and both my sisters like my dolls so I know they would take care of them. Honestly I would be more worried about letting my family know how much I care about them, if I were to die prematurely. I’ve only had one brush with death (my own fault) and Ive realized that while I love my things they aren’t what’s really important to me.
       
    15. Do you wonder what happens with your dolls once you pass on? Any one have plans for them? I do wonder this sometimes, and I'm worried about them getting trashed. It's the fate of all things, but I wonder if there are anyways to keep them around for a little longer. Of course, I would be dead so I would no longer be able to care, but there the worries still remain as I am alive, if I even have one by then. What do you plan on doing with them?

      Also wondering if there's any museum/specialty locations that they can be sent to for something. I guess something like a museum where they have those dioramas and if a doll can be used in those.
       
    16. I don't really think or plan about such things but I imagine if I kicked the bucket my husband would send them off to my dollfriends :3nodding: I don't care whether they keep or sell them, it's enough that they would stay within the community and be loved by their new owners :XD: Cause I'd like to haunt one of them and I don't want to just collect dust :evil:
       
      • x 1
    17. I think about it a lot ;) realistically if it's important to you, you should probably make a will. Never too young to think about death! :lol:
      You know, if I had money, I guess lots of money because there are definitely other things I would do first.. it would be cool to start a doll museum for dolls left behind so to speak. Maybe I could market it as a spooky attraction. I'm a bit weird and all, but I think there is something tender about a doll after the owner has gone. It would be nice to leave one as they were, in memory.
      As for myself I think provided there was anyone left in my daily life who knew or cared about me at all (fingers crossed) they would understand not to junk them. Now, whether they would have the spoons to actually deal with it, can't exactly be predicted.
      I would want my dolls to go on to find more adventures though, or at least be with people I knew in life/online who liked them. I'd probably want to leave one of my cat's favorite behind for my cat to sit on because he sure does love them.
      I would hope, in the event I didn't have a detailed and specific doll-for-doll will, that my loved one would ring up those I knew in the hobby still and ask them to start picking. I have at least a friend or two I have already asked if they are interested when it happens. Otherwise, pretty much as I was in life, I would hope they would go to where they are needed, budget collectors or if donated, to a charity where maybe the sale could help a good cause. Some charity shops fund animal shelters, various outreach programs, or homeless shelters as a few examples.
      Sometimes I think about the "you can't take it with you" thing ... And wonder if I would be buried with one. It would be kind of an homage to the idea of having your important things with you for the afterlife (which I don't exactly believe there is...) But it seems sad to condemn any of my dolls to death with me :XD:
       
      • x 3
    18. (Prefacing this with something not doll-related but important: It's never too early to talk to your family and loved ones about death, especially in regards to advanced directives, because accidents can always happen! The last thing anyone wants is to not know if they're making the right decision by their family member who might be in the ICU and unable to tell them what they want. That's why it's good to have these conversations now! If you live in the US, I recommend looking into the Order of the Good Death. Their website has a bunch of information on end-of-life planning, what to do if you don't want your legal family involved in your end-of-life care or burial, what costs will look like if you or your family member is fat, confronting fear and anxieties about death, eco-friendly burial options, and more. They also have green burial info for people in Canada or the UK. It's a good resource, so check it out if you can.)

      Anyway, for me, I don't have virtually any friends in the doll hobby I could give my dolls to so in the event of my death, I want to at the very least leave my family resources for selling the dolls on ebay to help with my funeral costs. Barring that, I like to imagine my dolls showing up in a thrift shop and having someone stumble across the hobby and finding a new passion, so maybe I'll have them donated. That's the kind of impact I want to leave on this world.
       
      • x 5
    19. I put them in my will. They can be sold or kept, however they like. I’ve put notes on the bottom of their stands noting what doll it is and if it has a box and so on. But, I know it’s going to be a hassle no matter what. :(
       
      • x 2
    20. I feel like there's another thread on here exactly about this same topic, but I could be just déjà vu-ing again (old-fart here!).

      I talk about death all the time; I talk about it so much, people who know me IRL probably think I am a huger weirdo than I already am. I have plenty of young extended family members that are into anime, 1:6 action figures, dolls, ect. I have already received plenty of people requesting me to leave a lot of those things I collect for them to inherit, in my will. I know it's probably morbid for a lot of people, but you never know when you'll kick the bucket. I have always lived with the knowledge that life is borrowed, but you don't get to decide (most of the time) when you'll have to give it back. I do have a will for my material possessions, and whatever little I cash I might have in the bank. I feel more comfortable knowing my "trash" won't end-up in a landfill, if I just up and die tomorrow. Then those who receive my material possessions after my passing, will do the same and pass it along to whomever in my extended family is there to keep them going for our next of kin to do the same etc, forever and ever. lol! (;
       
      • x 1