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You're not allowed that doll...

Nov 9, 2010

    1. Have you ever been told that you weren't allowed to get a certain size doll or sculpt for whatever reason?

      Recently I was talking to my boyfriend about dolls (which he's actually open and supportive about) and I happened to mention Dollmore Lusion and how she's, well, child-sized. This really freaked him out, which I can understand, I found the idea a little odd at first. But since then he refuses to look at any pics of her (so I could prove she's not creepy >.>) and I'm not allowed to talk about that doll at all. As you can probably imagine from the reaction, I was soon told I was never allowed to buy a Dollmore Lusion, because even the thought makes him uncomfortable.

      I'm quite sad about that, I don't know if I ever would have bought one but I find it quite interesting. I don't really mind at the end of the day, since I appreciate the reason.

      But I was just wondering if anyone else has been told they can't get a doll by someone else?

      EDIT: I think I need to elaborate a bit more :sweat yes, I can't talk about it or own her but that's because it's quite a big fear of his, and since we're living together I have no problem compromising. I'm just interested in hearing any similar stories from other doll owners, but thanks for the support ;)
    2. I've never been told that I can't have a specific doll by my boyfriend (who is also very supportive, and likes to make up adventure stories for me featuring my dolls) but he does give input on the sculpts I am looking at and how they would fit in my my other dolls. It's more like "you wouldn't like a Rosette School once you got her home, but I bet you would like a MNF."

      Or he thinks romantic eyes are creepy. I don't mind the input because I wouldn't want to have something that really bothered him in our house, just like he wouldn't bring some super scary movie/video game in that would bother me.
    3. Oh wow! Thats interesting that he doesn't even feel comfortable of you owning one! Maybe he feels like once you get one that you will feel the need of having a child of your own? XD
      Anywho, I haven't been told this yet but some other members on youtube of who helped me a lot when I first started kinda warned against a Lusion being my first doll and should save for when I have other dolls first. They said its not a wise decision since it will take a lot of work of handling her for my first time and also since I am 5'2 she will be close to being over half my height! X_X Of course, I have not given up on the idea (not at all! ^-^). I would actually really consider her my first child and would take beautiful realistic professional photo shoots of her and I. I am so excited! I am hoping I can get her by next year (since she pretty much is a big expense @_@). Good luck on whatever you choose love! ^_^
    4. My husband doesn't tell me what I can/can't buy. And, quite frankly, he wouldn't be my husband if he did. However, he does try to keep me grounded in non-resin reality. "I don't mind if you buy X doll, but remember that we need to start buying Christmas presents soon too."

      As long as you do your research (is the doll going to be too big/small? does it cost too much? how do you find wigs/eyes/clothes for it?) and have enough money to afford it I don't see a problem.
    5. Your boyfriend says you are "not allowed" ?
      Apart from the virtues of the doll, isn't that a little controlling?
    6. There is one rule and one rule only: "No clowns!" Which I'm down with, since I hate them too. :P
    7. Hm, that's difficult. Personally, I had not this experience. I am not allowed to buy a doll from our savings, I have to save up first.

      Is he afraid of the doll? I can imagine that to some extent. Does he look at other doll pictures?
    8. Your boyfriend is probably thinking you're thinking of reproduction. Really freak him out and buy a reborn.
    9. Beware of men who think they can tell you what to do with you own money, your own life and your own self.

      And to answer the question, no. Nobody would dare tell me that I am not allowed to buy something.
    10. My Fiancé has never forbidden me from getting a sculpt that he knows I will cherish and enjoy, just as I do not deny him things that he takes joy in. Even though he isn't a doll enthusiast and shows very little interest towards the ones I do have, he does understand that I find them enjoyable. He will gripe occassionally about the expensiveness of the habit, but never a particular sculpt.
    11. Nobody tells me what I can and can't buy -- I'm an adult, the choice is mine. I can see the need to discuss large purchases (like a doll) with a partner if you're sharing finances, but when it comes to likes and dislikes, well if it's my hobby, then it's my opinion that really matters. Nobody else has to handle or even be interested in my dolls if they don't want to, but they do have to accept that this is something that I do, and I will follow my own heart when it comes to picking sculpts.

      Have you asked him why he feels uncomfortable? If he's very against you getting the doll, then I think it's only fair that he be willing to at least talk about it.
    12. I have never been told I cannot buy/own a certain doll. Except by customs, who seems to love one of my packages so much they don't want to release it... But that's another story.

      My money, my life, my choices. Family has a right to express an opinion; the rest might be heard. But absolutely no one has the right to forbid anything to me.

      Neither can he forbid you to buy a doll. Is he per chance paying for her? Is he going to carry her, dress her, give her a faceup? Is he going to play with her, take pics? One should think you can buy a doll if you like her. Your bf has probably some tastes or habits that you don't like, do you forbid him those?
    13. If it's your own money, your boyfriend has no say in this really :/
      If you want that doll really bad, and you can afford it all by yourself, I don't see why you shouldn't get it. It won't harm him in any way. Like someone said, he might think you want a baby yourself or something, but that's just silly logic and if you tell him you just want a doll, it should be fine.
      Everyone has a right to an opinion, but in the end, you are the one who decides what you do.
    14. Forgot to add...

      This sort of control can be a very slippery slope. What does he want to control next? What clothes you buy? What movies you go see? Be very wary of significant others who like to control major aspects of your life. They often don't know how to stop themselves.

      (This also extends to family members, assuming you're an adult and buying the doll with your own money.)
    15. I do think there's a large difference between a loved one/ family member expressing that they think the concept of a doll is creepy and they wouldn't be comfortable being around it versus just declaring outright that I'm not allowed to buy it.

      I will usually talk to my mom or my friends about the dolls I plan to purchase because it's a lot of money to put toward something and I'm the type of person who needs to talk it out first. While I was deciding whether or not I wanted a Pukifee or PukiPuki size Pong doll, I had trouble talking it out because my mom and friends both thought he was creepy and didn't want to look at him. They didn't tell me that I couldn't buy him, but did express that they wouldn't want to see him if I did. In the end, I talked it out with my baby brother who thought Pong was adorable so it worked out in the end.

      I agree with what everyone else is telling you, there's a HUGE difference between "That doll concept kinda worries me, I don't know if I'm comfortable with it..." and "You can't buy that doll. I won't let you do that." It's highly controlling and, as someone who has found herself in more controlling and abusive relationships that she cares to admit, I recommend that you don't let him control what you want to do with your money. If he doesn't like the Lusion doll, he doesn't have to see her. He has no business, however, to tell you that you can't have her.

      (Though, I'll be honest, I personally find the concept of the Lusion dolls kinda creepy myself, but I figured I'd need to see one in person rather than in pictures to get a feel for her scale before I wrote her off completely. I do think she's a lovely doll, but...she's so expensive, too! o_O probably because she's so big...hm.)
    16. My boyfriend knows if he ever told me I could -not- buy a doll, the next thing I would buy would be -that- doll. :)

      I do my own thing and the people who care about me know this. They are more than willing to weigh in with their input, and I love them for that! And I do listen to what they have to say. Ultimately, though, they and I both know that the final decision is mine, and mine alone.
    17. I have never been forbidden from a SPECIFIC doll, no...my mother-in-law, however, tried to forbid me from buying ANY dolls, and to make me get rid of the three I had at the time. She didn't say it to ME...but she TRIED to bully my husband into doing the forbidding and getting rid of the current dolls. As he has no issue with my collecting (aside from the cost of some on my 'to get' list, anyway) he told me what she'd said, and just asked that I not talk about them around her, and not bring them into her home. So...I don't talk to HER about them, though I'm sure she still hears me talking about them with other people when she's in hearing distance, and I don't take them to her house unless we're house sitting so she's not going to be there.

      My response to her wanting to forbid me to buy more, let alone get rid of those I had, is the same I would have towards ANYONE trying to forbid my owning/buying dolls in general, or specific ones. That he could go $*&% herself. My hobby, my business. The only person who has input that matters at all is my husband, because he's the one who works, while I take care of our children, and so pays for my dolls. And the most that HE does is remind me when we just can NOT afford the doll I want, and that we'll keep saving until we CAN afford it.
    18. lol Tiarah I might consider the same thing...of course my husband pays the bills and usually for my dolls.

      I would have said she's a big doll and left it at that :D (and she's not truly child size....She is the same height as the mecha angels I believe....just a little differently proportioned)
    19. I've never been told by no one or a significant one what I am or not allowed to buy and I will not tolerate such behavior at all. I can listen to opinions but in the end they will do little to nothing in my decision to purchase what I want with the money I work for.

      If it makes someone uncomfortable (family members, friends, partners) they're free not to look at it, since I know I won't ever tell them what they're allowed to do with their money.
    20. I've never been told no, but Lusion scares -me- so I can feel for the guy. Considering how realisitc some of these dolls are, just the thought of one that's the size of a toddler is disturbing.. I don't know what sort of man your boyfriend is, but he just sounds very scared, not horrid. I'd suggest thinking of ways to make her presense less creepy to him, especially if you are living together. Maybe leave a picture up on your screen? Of course if you live separately then go on and get her, lol. Just put her away when he visits and gradually introduce her presence in a non-threatening manner.