Being Asked to Sell Your Doll By Fellow Hobbyist

Like what most people here had said it would depend on how they had approached me with the question. I would have outright be offended if they were forcefull about me selling my doll just to give to someone else but put the question in a nice way I would have declined them still although I wouldn't be offended of the offer.

 

I think it would only be acceptable if you had mentioned that you were thinking of selling the doll... or were dissatisfied with it, or not bonding, otherwise it strikes me as being rude.

 

No, I think it's weird. If I mention I'm thinking of selling, then sure. But if someone just out of the blue wants me to sell them a doll of mine, even if they're not really rude or pushy, it comes off as entitled and creepy to me.

 

Agreed, and if they were willing to pay that, I'd take it!

 

Absolutely! And immediately make a WTB-post in the marketplace .

 

It's all in the delivery and circumstances certainly! I have always believed that it never hurts to ask - you have nothing to lose except the person saying no and the hunt will then have to continue. I'd have been flattered but I have no problem saying to the person, "Sorry, but no." It only becomes a rude situation if they are relentless at badgering you about selling it rather than having a polite, positive conversations about BJDs.

 

I guess the right answer is "it depends...". However, I would not consider it rude nor would I feel offended if someone asks me to sell one of my dolls. I would simply say "no, thank you." and that's it. I believe that it never hurts to ask but the tone of speech helps a lot.

What I find rude is when people ask you for the doll like "I want that doll, can I have it?". I have been asked that and I found it very distasteful.

 

I can see why it could be seen as offensive. You've put time, effort and money into your doll and they mean a lot to you. While I personally find it in poor taste to ask someone to sell their doll, I had to vote for it depends, simply because some people are really polite about it. Others don't have a clue. Also if they want a doll to go with the one they already have they could have just inquired about the maker and sculpt and ordered one themselves... I mean if they have the money to just buy a doll then why not buy their own? Clearly the original doll has a home.

 

While I don't think it's rude for someone to say something along the lines of "if you ever want to sell the doll let me know, I love it" I think it's rude to ask someone straight out "sell me your doll now" and this goes for other hobbies as well.

 

There's other ways to phrase things so it's not so rude. You can just have a conversation and mention that you like a doll a whole lot after seeing one in person, you're interested in buying one if the opportunity arises. This isn't asking someone to sell their doll but it opens the conversation to find out if someone is considering selling..... if I wanted to know if someone was willing to sell their doll, this is how I would find out. This way, it's pleasant for both people and you get to have a fun conversation about a doll you both like!

 

Well, for me it would actually depend on which one of my dolls they asked about. I'm certainly more emotionally attached to some of my dolls than others, like if someone inquired about Farera, Candy or Ogden I might get offended, but some of my other dolls that I might be considering re-shelling or selling it would depend on how the person asked.

I remember though an old friend of mine saying that once 3 DoA members actually ganged up on her and demanded she sell one of her dolls! Now that was definitely flat-out rude (also harassment too), the closest I've come to someone actually asking to sell one of my dolls was an 8yr old little girl who was like, "That doll is soooo cute! Can I buy her?" Of course, she was a child so it's not like she really understood that that could come-off as a little inappropriate.

 

Honestly, I don't think its anything to be offended about. I would almost take it as a complement (seeing the brighter side of the situation) that your doll is so well kept for and so beautiful that someone would ask you to sell it to them.

 

Depends on how they ask, for me.
I'd be kinda flattered that they were interested if it was something I customized myself, and I could understand if it was a limited or something to that effect. Now, the price they offer...that might be insulting if they try to low ball me. Or refusing to take no for an answer, cause that's probably what I'm going to say. The act of asking, is something I don't actually mind. It's not like they're privy to my private thoughts regarding a particular doll after all.

I personally would not ask unless the person has expressed an interest in selling it beforehand, but I'm just cautious like that.

 

For me, I think it's borderline rude to even ask in an 'if you ever think about selling her' scenario for a doll that is not listed or discussed anywhere for sale. Even for a newcomer to the hobby you very soon pick up that BJD's are more than just a 'doll' and that people are attached to them and invest not only a lot of money and time in them but a lot of love in creating their own characters.

 

I think it would be kind of rude to flat out ask. Like hey sell that doll I like it. No that's not cool. I mean yeah, if you mentioned you were thinking about selling it, or you didn't feel a bond with the doll then sure, but it would really have to be like a simple suggestion like "well then why not sell them?" instead of saying like "you should sell that doll because I like it". I've seen some people responding to that sort of comments and I am flabbergasted that they were asked in the first place. If you like a doll, say so, don't ask if you can buy it off that person! I know some people don't understand, and if you are new, but dang some people have some nerves.

 

Unless you were hinting that you might want to sell it, she shouldn't have wanted to buy the doll off you. It's nice that she wanted to buy a doll for her daughter but she should look elsewhere. If I was in your position I would probably be uncomfortable and slightly irritated.

 

I'm here to challenge some of the responses and be encouraging... Upon being asked about selling your doll, why do you immediately start thinking about how much you don't want to lose them? That is, when you imagine being asked to sell your doll, do you imagine them being ABLE to take it from you if you don't want to sell it? Does being asked to sell something create an emotional conflict where you WANT to say yes? I can see how that story of the twin dolls at the con would do that, as it's hard to pick the option that would disappoint a child, but otherwise, do you folks just get scared of the thought? You own your dolls. You're entitled to do what you want with that ownership, including not give it up to someone just because they want what you have. We sternly correct kids not to run up and grab/ask to have other kids toys, but we stammer and feel uncomfortable when on the receiving end of that sort of request. If you get asked to sell one and you don't want to, you're doing just fine by saying no, no matter how much the other person pouts and re-asks. Who knows how long they've been acting like that, and using it to get their way? That's like... a 3 year old's cookie jar tactic (that only works because they're cute/annoying XD) and it's an insult to have it used on you.

I've been doing some thinking about the concept of 'rudeness' as I believe it's rooted in ignorance of what is and isn't rude and general obliviousness... so, theoretically, thinking and reading about what people call rude can make you informed and less rude. I believe everyone's unintentionally rude, all the time. Why? Because I work at a tourist attraction and all I see is rude people all day long. (With enough awesome exceptions who are the real reason I'm there.) But seriously, I know I'm guilty too. There are some days when my energy level doesn't allot me the reaction time to respond to 'you have such beautiful hair!' before the cashier person gets mad and decides I have ignored them. (and in that particular story, go on to make sarcastic quips about it to a coworker who pretended to respond with a thank you) And to heck with trying to clear that kind of thing up. There are more important things to be doing than clearing up some shallow, energy-drink infused stranger's misunderstanding, like you know, consuming my purchase and not caring that a nearly bald guy stole my hair compliment. It's just more evidence though that it's pretty easy to be rude without intending to, and we're probably all unknowingly rude all day long, such as not realizing things while driving. (I'm talking about stuff you don't even realize after you've done it. Stuff that you won't even remember because you don't even notice you did it.) but also things like honking and not realizing what's actually holding up traffic (which might be entirely understandable). My understanding is that rudeness is centered in ignorance and putting people in an uncomfortable position.

Being asked to sell a doll doesn't really need to make you uncomfortable though, if that's what it does... but I DO see how adding a kid into the equation changes that a bit and makes it rude... because then you essentially have an adult doing the pouty lip FOR their kid, and putting you in a position where they're REALLY asking "I don't wanna disappoint my kid, and YOUR willingness to give up your doll means the difference between disappointing this child or not. So... pretty please? For her?" Argh. They shouldn't have gotten their kid's hopes up for TWO of them at the prerelease, maybe? I'd have just pointed out that they'd be for sale soon online, and that's pretty much where you have to go to buy them... usually... depends. I know many people's spirits die when you tell them that they have to go to the internet to buy something. (imagine. Sitting in the comfort of your own home and letting the postman throw it at your house instead of getting up and driving somewhere to buy it!) Educate em'.

But yeah, me personally, I actually am glad I found this thread, because I would have probably felt a bit weird/shocked myself. (and I'm actually guilty of asking if a wig was for sale not knowing that people were in the middle of selling/buying it from one another at a meet. Ooh, I noobed it up bad at those meets. Went nuts over a pongpong's and dropped her hand and everything.) It got me thinking about how I'd respond. Most of my dolls I wouldn't want to sell, especially as-is. But I realized I would definitely be willing to part with certain things for the right price.

If someone asked me today, it'd depend on which doll, but I might just ask "well what is it about him you want to buy?" ...If it's the whole doll + clothes, most likely I'd say no. But say, they really liked a head sculpt and the outfit but left me with the body. I might honestly be willing to sell it and try again, trying to find a better outfit and a better head sculpt. I'm also really odd, and if it's unpainted or an easy mod to replicate, I might be willing to sell the head and just do it again. I'm not big on resin matching 100% anyhow. I'd honestly be willing to let one of my guys sit around headless for a while. Maybe body-less, too. If the price is right, it's just a bit of a wait to get a replacement. I'd be willing to try and find a better body for one of my hybrids who haven't been modded to fit well yet. I only have one YOSD that's limited edition with a fully custom OOAK outfit and not easily replaced, and one head which I'd have trouble finding again to mod again. Otherwise, I'd consider pretty much anything, especially if it's only part of the doll. The main thing I wouldn't want to sell is a custom wig or outfit I had made just for my doll. That would be hard to get me to part with. In the very least I'd overcharge for it. I pretty much don't own a single pair of shoes I wouldn't be willing to sell if someone wanted them, and I'd just go hunting for some replacement. I enjoy hunting and post-man stalking too darn much. Sadly I'd consider selling the doll to the kid, met with that situation, and wait the extra month or whatever... But that's just me. I don't really like that it's adult-aided mooching, but as long as they didn't try to talk me into a discount too, I'd consider making the kid happy... even though that possibly turns them into an entitled brat that wants their thing with instant gratification, with their parent patting their head the entire way... AKA growing up to be just like me and the rest of our society... Y_Y

 

I find it rather socially awkward when someone offers to buy something of mine that I've given no indication I was interested in selling. (I've never had it happen with BJDs, but I have in another doll hobby. And I once actually had a dinner party guest ask if she could buy my cat, no joke.) I'm not offended by it, it just makes for for an odd interaction.

If someone absolutely must do this, they should ask once, politely, and take no for an answer if I say no. That said, if they're going to ask, I'd rather they just ask directly rather than hinting around. I don't want to have to play guessing games to figure out what they're getting at, and I don't want to get a guilt trip. If I feel like the request is manipulative (and bringing up the kid and the new house sounds like it may have been at least bordering on that,) my response would be annoyance - not that they asked, but that they tried to take advantage of the situation.

 

It depends on the circumstances, but I'd find it rude if someone asked me to sell them something I never mentioned the idea of selling to begin with, especially if it's something important to me. It's one thing if they're curious to how much it would cost to get the same thing, but outright being pushy about buying one someone already owns immediately gives off a bad impression.

 

While people can be very nice and polite while asking, I still think this is rude behavior regardless. If the person owning the doll has made no mention of even considering selling, it just doesn't seem right to me to ask anyway, especially in a hobby liike this where a lot of people love and value their dolls.