Bonding and YOU.

When I first saw Jun Tachibana, I was like, ehh, she's okay. But the more I looked at her pictures, the more I liked her. It got to the point where I was frantic that I wouldn't be able to get her through HD, but thankfully a very dear friend helped me out. When she arrived, she was perfect. I changed her eyes, her wig, and she's completely become Lilly. Jun who? She's my perfect doll, the one I could stare at for hours.

My Syo is very special to me. Compared to the others out there, Elliot's probably not very special, faceup wise. He definitely could use a new mouth. But he was my first big doll, and the first customized doll that I really fell hard for. He's the one I cuddle when I'm having a bad day.

How I bond: the first thing I do upon receiving a new doll is completely change something about them, whether it be their eyes or hair color. That way they're not just another _____ .

 

What a neat idea. I'll litter this with some pictures for you to use too.

I must admit getting Klaus was kind of an impulse buy. Totchi had always wanted one, and I admited that they were very beautiful, and wouldn't mind owning one. So we both both in for the Too and Bee-A set. It was easy to decide who got which doll, thankfully. I even picked out a name for him, that just seemed to stick.

At first I was rather indifferent about the whole thing. Yes, I was excited, but at the same time I didn't feel like I was going to view him as much more than an artist's model, but after the long 8 weeks it took for them to get here and I finally got to hold him, everything changed. I couldn't stop touching him, and playing with him. I started to make him clothes, and wigs, and carried him around the house.

Even though for the longest time he wasn't even painted ( picture ) he still had the ornery personallity, though in a more boyish sense of it. I couldn't wait to get him painted so I could really start experimenting. So when me and Totchi got together to paint that was another experience all together! I think that was really what helped me bond the most with him, was putting in the labor to shape him to look how he felt like he should look like.

Even though my paint job wasn't perfect, all of Klaus's little imperfections made me love him even more, and made him seem more human to me. ( picture) He became more than just an expensive toy and became his own little entity. Whether he's posing for photos, scolding me for embarassing him or attacking hide plushie I couldn't beleive that he had grown into such a feisty little imp.

I never thought I'd end up loving him as much as I do now. Even though a lot of people still think he was a waste of money, I know better because they can't see who he really is.

 

Okay, I'm in!

Rikku (my friend LeeAnn's CH Miya) was the first bjd I ever saw in person. I had seen pix of her, and thought she was really neat. I was HOPING when I saw her I wouldn't like her in person... after all they are $$, and I love dolls, I JUST LOVE DOLLS, so I really was hoping I wouldn't like her in person. Because I knew that if I did... I'd be in some trouble money-wise. I saw Cindy's Choa Jenna in pictures and in person once, and really really fell hard for her. HARD. But Choa is SO expensive... so I was able to resist. I try (don't always succeed, but I TRY) to only use $$ I get from jewelry sales to buy doll things. I do have a regular (boring) job, and my paycheck has to go for bills mortgage groceries, etc. So again... able to resist, UNTIL people started asking me for bjd jewelry. So I kinda started thinking about it... and Anna, an online friend, sent me a link to a brand new US site called BlueFairy.

I really liked May. I wanted a girl, and yes price was a factor, about 1/2 as expensive as a Choa, what if I didn't like her... so I looked, and looked at that site... and one day stumbled across that bluefairy korean fan site, where they have a lot of pictures of standard bluefairy dolls as boys AND girls. And there I saw Jeremiah Blue, a jerome girl, with her little pretty pout and eyes staring out at me, and I was sunk. So I ordered her.

And when she came... I didn't like her very much. I was like OMG what did I just DO, I spent all this $$ and I don't like her. I didn't hate her, far from it, but it wasn't instant love either, let me tell you. OMG. The eyes I had for her were too small, so she DID kinda look creepy to me... I couldn't figure out how to get her head cap off to change her eyes... she was just such an odd doll to what I was used to, that my initial reaction was "OMG WHAT DID YOU JUST DO??" But after I got the right size eyes PRONTO (thanks to Karin Bussman), sat and played with her a little, got brave enough to put lashes on her, Jeremiah Blue was really "born", and we all know how much I love her. I know I will never ever ever sell her. She is perfect. She looks good in everything, any style, any wig or eye color, and she loves to wear them all.

Well that's my story on JB, and it's long enough, LOL... I guess after getting one of my own, my attitude about their price shifted... I was able to see first-hand the work involved in making one, and see them as little works of art. I do have my favorites as you know, it's no secret; but I do feel bonded to ALL my dolls and really don't want to sell ANY of them. The more I play with any given one, the more I love that one too. They are all so different.

There's room in my heart for everybody. :grin:

Well I do have something to add about bonding in general.... I was disappointed in my tender pair when they arrived, and although Orlando is very different and really gorgeous now, I am in a way least bonded to her because part of me remembers that disappointment. I am SURE that's not true for everybody, because people are different; but I had a negative experience trying to get a doll, and just knew that there was no way I could ever overcome that, and sold it off right away. Some people might be able to take an unpleasant situation and kind of turn it around, but I couldn't.

Penelope was purchased on a whim (that's an expensive whim, LOL) when my Dad was in the hospital and not doing very well, and it was a very stressful time. She was my "I need a distraction" doll, yet, the more I play with her, the more I love her, she's a neat bitchy little thing, LOL, and I love her more and more. She doesn't remind me of Dad in a negative way, so I'm able to love her and play with her. I'm still getting to know her - but I think she is just neat. Dad is better now, so that's a good thing. I might feel differently about her if the outcome with Dad was different - she might make me sad, and that would be reason to not keep her, too.

You also asked about characters in mind - I never have a character in mind at all, I don't really play with my dolls that way. I do put a little thought into whether or not I think they might "go" together well or not, but other than that, I really just choose on their face, if I see one I love, and then they seem to start developing characters of their own.

That said, any character they have is pretty much based on appearance - for example Shawn, who I often say is my sweet little beauty who just thinks of puppies and kittens - well look at that face sometime, how could her character be of a mean manipulative girl who is unkind to others? :grin:

 

Thanks, guys!

Now, is it okay with all of you if I were to use these stories? (Obviously with a link to your site/e-mail/whatever.) Perhaps even pictures of the dolls you're talking about?

 

That's fine by me, Meep, you feel free. :grin:

I read this and I think... can you BELIEVE that I wasn't sure I liked Jeremiah Blue when she first arrived???

I really love her so much. SOOO so so much.

 

Feel free, I agree ^^, you don't even need to link to my page if you want to ^^

You can get any picture you want that I ever posted ^^

 

Feel free. I don't have a site or anything, so you could link to my livejournal I guess. redrosewhite

 

@______@ Why was it that much?? That makes me worried~

 

'Cause I live on a damned place called BRAZIL. Got it? Here 1 dollar = 3 reais (reais = our money) here tax = 70% of inal price

But we have wonderful fruiiits that's what matters ^^ - and wonderful pics and plaaceees! - I have a love/hate relationship with my country! XD

 

Thanks, guys.
(Sher- I loved Jeremiah Blue immediatly. She was the one I looked at while waiting for Ichiiro. Also, it seems to me, you had said something about that name being temporary. Guess not, eh?)

 

The first pictures I took of her, she looked weird. She DID, lol... eyes too small... (cuz she didn't come with any).

The name that was temporary was "Jeromina" since she was a jerome GIRL... and somebody on THIS board said, how about Jeremiah? and I just thought it was cool, cool, cool. Well I didn't LOVE her for, oh, the first 2 days maybe is all? Then the more I played with her...I remember I put a red gothic lolita outfit on her and she went "NO" ... she started to talk to me, as well as look better (eye size/eyelashes/a little blush)... then ...

 

With me, when I first get a doll I usually baby him/her until I know his/her name. Babying includes carrying him/her everywhere, having him/her sleep in my bed, taking tons of pictures, and generally paying lots of attention to the new family member. I usually try to find a good hairstyle for the new babe, perform desired customizations, and make a few outfits, until I know what suits them and their personality, what would be out of character and what works well.

Now, it can take weeks or even months to get your new addition to trust you enough for them to tell you his/her name and about themself, but don't rush it, because rushing to learn about the child (or whatever age range your doll fits in) can lead them to feel like a guest, which will not work because they are now a permanent addition to your family.

it is easy, for me atleast, to tell what is out of character or what is in character for my doll to wear/look like. For instance, I actually do sometimes like boy dolls in EGL dresses, but I know my boy would NEVER wear something like that, unless there happened to be one somewhere he happened to be, and he was by himself. Of course, that is contradiction, because I'd have to put it on him. So, as a matter of fact, he would never put on an EGL dress, or a dress or skirt in general, as it is so out of character (unless he was being forced to model one for selling, where he doesn't need to be in character ;])

Back on topic, it's very important to be open to anything, because a lot of the times dolls aren't how you would have expected when you bought them, aspecially if you've already assigned them a character.

 

I only have one doll at the moment, so I don't know how our relationship, so to speak, compares to other dolls I may eventually meet.

I never doubted that I would bond instantly and completely with the first doll I chose, and honestly, Shiwoo was kind of an impulse buy -- I went, "Oh," and two weeks later had broken down and ordered him.

I planned out the basics of his character before I ever saw him in person. I knew he was the personification of the "wounded boy" who kept showing up in my drawings -- shy, pale, sweeter than sugar, emotionally traumatized and generally injured by all the cruelties of life. I wanted to be able to nurture him, but I also wanted him to understand my marginally cynical and morbid approach to things. (Does that sound harsh? I don't mean it to.)

When I finally got Mischa, he started "speaking" to me straight out of the box, sans face-up and wig. He turned into a fully fleshed character, stubborn and darling and my own.

Now it's kind of ridiculous how dear he is to me. I have sanded him, restrung him, done three face-ups, cycled through wigs, and generally fussed over him. I put him to bed every night, and most mornings I wake and dress him, and when I'm feeling lonely I make him come sleep with me.

Honestly, I find the smell of his resin comforting. What does *that* tell you??

 

I have a question...
What if you get your doll in pieces? (Osaka, maybe that one you can answer?)
That is, you buy just the head at first, and it comes with nothing. No face-up, no eyes, no wigs... and you know it'll be a long while until you can give it all those things AND a body.
Moreover, you buy it without having a character in mind for it, nor a name...

Will it take a gazillion years until something (bond) grows out of it?

 

My first doll, August, arrived in pieces. I actually got his body first, and his head about a month later. I wasn't even sure if I'd like the head - it's an RML R-01 and it was so new at the time and rather unpopular, so not really anyone else on the board had one ^^;
I bonded with him from the moment he arrived though. Just that wonderful resin body with chopsticks for a head was enough. He's still the most dear to me of all my dolls.

I don't grow into a bond, I've found. For me, it's always immediate, or nearly so. If I haven't fallen for the doll within the first day or two, it just doesn't happen. Though, even if I don't bond immediately, I know when I will because the doll in question just looks alive. If they don't seem alive the first moment I look at them, they never will to me. When they seem alive, the flaws don't matter anymore.
And strange as it sounds, often the other dolls have to like him/her also if the newcomer is going to stay.

A Tohya was my second doll to arrive, third purchased, and he was pure impulse. I'd loved the promo pics of him, and when the Doll&Hobby lottery rolled around, I threw my name in the hat to get him and lucked out. I wasn't sure about him when I first saw him in person, but August immediately decided that he was meant to stay. And so he has. I'd say I'm not as close to him as to my other dolls, because he's just manifested a rather withdrawn and formal personality, but it's how he's supposed to be.

An Isao repaint was next, and was again, a testament to pure luck. I'd fallen in love with him back when he still belonged to Aimee and when I saw him up for sale on the board I leapt at the chance. The Isao face is very different in person than in photos, so again I had initial feelings of uncertainty, but let the two in residence decide. I was a bit worried that getting two dolls in rapid succession might make me blase about him or something, but I warmed up to him very quickly after a couple days.

The next boy I was after was an F-16. I initially wanted to assemble my own or go for FCS, but it happened that Mia was selling her snowskin F16, and despite the fact that it would mean I wouldn't get to paint an F16 like I so wanted to, despite the fact that I strongly prefer normal skin tone over white, and despite the fact that he didn't have anything close to the faceup I'd had in mind...something just told me to go for him. A fourth boy was welcomed into the fold.

I hadn't seriously planned to get a girl doll, much less an MSD sized one, but the more I'd been seeing of the U-noas, the more I was wanting one. I found a poor Sist who'd been listed on the board for a couple weeks but somehow hadn't been grabbed up, so I went for her. A couple days before she arrived I began to have my doubts about whether I could really like a girl doll, but I bonded with her the instant I opened her box. There is something really special about the U-noas.

My U-noa was the only doll I'd named before she arrived. The others told me their names afterwards, and bit by bit revealed their personalities and stories.

 

Ahahah, Shin was a head first. He came outta' the box cussing and hasn't shut up since. Says he ran into some trouble with the Yakuza and the blackmarketed the rest of his body parts. Sometimes I think it was just to get him to shut up. -_-;
(Just kidding. ^^ )

 

Thanks, Kiriko Moth and Zoi!
It's just that my plans for dolls might be changing (slightly, or more, I'm not sure yet.. ^^; and they do involve a disembodied head who might or might not fit the character in my head...

Well, we'll see! :grin:

 

Well, Isao is sitting here, looking a bit concerned at the moment...it _has_ been hard bonding with him, because he doesn't have a body, and I bond best with my dolls through play. He doesn't have the right wig yet, and his eyes aren't the right color for Erik (though I don't have the heart to change out those beautiful eyes of Isao's). I love him so much, but right now it is much more one of those "oh, he'll never notice me! He's too cool for me." sort of relationships. It makes waiting for all the extra bits much harder, at least for me, but waiting has let me wonder exactly what sort of boy Erik is. I thought I knew, but now I'm not so sure...

:cry: Poor Erik/Isao looks sad now...why do they do that so well?

PherretLord is going through this right now too...he's ordering a blank head, but he doesn't know anything about her, but he knew she was right for him. He's actually eager to have just a blank that he will get to know as he starts faceups and the like.

I think every person handles it differently, and I think it may be easier in some ways if you don't have a character already in mind...you don't have to try to find "just the right one" then.

 

I guess it depends on the person and the doll. It's a little harder to bond with something like that, y'know? But that was never a problem with my Mitya. From the moment I unwrapped his face and laid eyes on him for the first time, I was utterly enraptured. For a moment, I almost doubted that Soony would be perfect for me as is--the eLuts pics do her no justice--but seeing Mitya's face in person completely eliminated all doubt. And the customization completely cemented everything... it was something of a tricky undertaking to take a girl's head and transform it into a suitable form to match the boy in my head, but I felt like he was giving me support, and he came out exactly as I'd envisioned him. And if there was any gap remaining before, that completely filled it.

Carrying around a little head all of the time was a bit difficult, though, so I ended up sewing a little cloth body for him. It was really quite terrible, but it kept his and my morale up until the real thing got here. It's better to have a not-so-well-made cloth body than no body at all. ^_~;; And it had the added bonus of allowing me to snuggle. And, last but definitely not least, it made me REALLY appreciate it when he finally got a proper body! I remember that I put his head on, and as I finished the stringing, he put his arms out to me, and I think I melted right then and there. I love my baby

*meep, you're welcome to any of the pics I've posted. I'll come back to this thread when I'm a bit more awake and I'll add the stories for my last two dollies (because they're both special cases and therefore important... ish).


~Kalmia

 

My first doll was my FCS SD13 F29 boy Kei. When I'd first fallen for Super Dollfies I thought I wanted a girl, but then this character popped up and demanded a body. He just wouldn't go away, so I caved and got him one. ^_^ I didn't have a lot of trouble scraping together the money; it was late November and my parents always ask me to buy my own gifts anyway (I have very strange hobbies), so they were quite happy to let me put all the money relatives had sent for Christmas presents towards one big gift. Between that and the money I had saved already and what I would be able to get together before the next Visa bill arrived I had plenty for him, so I was lucky enough to be able to order my boy within a few weeks of discovering SDs. It took him forever to arrive, though, because I wanted his smirk sanded off so he had to go via a customiser first (thanks, Michele!). It was mid-March before he actually turned up! We bonded very quickly and well because his character was so well-developed before he got here and the doll was such a perfect shell for him. When I first opened the box and looked at him I was so pleased because he was just right. His body has changed his character very slightly, though - he's more aristocratic and more actively disdainful. I love him all the more for it, though. Of my three boys, he's definitely the one I'm bonded to the most. He's away being touched up at the moment, and I really miss him.

My second SD was Link, a modified Hewitt. Link was very much an impulse buy: I saw him on Y!J one day during the summer and fell totally in love. When he arrived, he was not in great condition; his body was dirty, his eyelashes were badly glued in and the inside of his head was filthy, and cleaning him up definitely helped us bond. Before I saw Link, I'd contemplated getting a playful, childish imp MSD to annoy Kei and Link is about as far away from that as possible (he's very dark-looking, a little haunted, a little sad and far too intelligent), so Link had no personality when he arrived. Because of that, I found it quite difficult to bond with him, although it was probably also something to do with his body. I hate the old MSD body with a passion (sorry!) and his chubby hands annoyed me immensely. He now has a new body with the slender optional hands, which helps a lot. In any case, although it took us a long time to bond, we have, but I'm still a bit fuzzy on who he really is.

My third doll was Katai, a Shiro, easily my most expensive doll to date. Katai, like Kei, had personality long before he had physical shape. As with Link, I bought him off Y!J, although in Katai's case I'd actively been looking. When he arrived he had his default make-up, which, although pretty, I couldn't bond with - to me, he was Shiro, not Katai, until Djinn gave him his make-over. Now Katai is very much bonded to his body, but sometimes I feel he is more bonded to Kei than to me. It was Kei who brought him home, and when he's not here, Katai seems further away as well, as opposed to Link, who doesn't seem to be bothered. Although I love Katai very much, I feel he's not mine so much as he is Kei's.

To be honest, I don't actually do anything but talk to my dolls to bond with them. I place them somewhere where I can look at them and they at me when I'm on the computer and I have conversations with them. Sometimes I think I should do more in the way of playing/photographing/etc, but the system works, so...