Bonding and YOU.

Its really great to hear from some people who have and haven't had the problem I have. I definately don't feel as guilty now. I know two of my main problems with my kid delf and the baha, while I loved their sculpts and how cute they were they were total impulse buys. I took money for both of them out of the fund for another doll; thehe doll that I just ordered my Dollzone Wing which I will be turning into Spock from Star Trek.

I've also been lucky enough to find really really great loving homes for the dolls I did impulse buys on. People that really seemed more than eager to adopt them into their doll families and love them like I can't. I just really can't see the reason for purchasing something at a high cost and let it sit there and not be loved.

 

When I bought my second one, Kohl (CP El) I had second thought about him during the time I waited for him. He FINALLY arrived home X-X (after 56 days) and I opened the box only to wrinkle my nose. >_< It was very depressing but after having him around for a week or two I've fallen in love. XD But it scared me out of my mind.

 

Ive have bonding issues with some other peoples dolls XP but not my own I love them to pieces.

 

I haven't actually gotten my doll yet. However, the character he's based on is one I've had for a looooooong time. Somewhere between seven and ten years, I think. xD He also probably wins the award for Most Developed Character out of my massive group.

So I have no doubt that I'll love the doll to pieces and bond with him immediately, barring some craziness -- I open the box and he's been battered in shipping, or I pick him up and he doesn't "feel" like my Zarr.

And if the doll's tight-strung and kicks me as soon as I pick him up, it's definitely Zarr. XD

 

I love my little Kyren to death, but my Bella was my first doll and I have the feeling she is always going to be special to me. I just look at her sometimes and squee in happiness because she's so pretty. X3

 

Hmmm... It depends, really. I don't think I bond with my dolls each in the same way. They're each special to me in different ways. Eiji is special through character, Hayden is special being my first doll... even if he's change mold now... Puffin was a gift from my boyfriend... and Vin was the first doll I bought all by myself - and he's hot! Max is just Max, really, he's special because I totally adore his little smirk and his crazy character.
I bond with the characters, really. Not the dolls. The dolls are just a bonus!

 

Hatsumi: She was my very first BJD, 27cm! I tried to find a cheap way to get a Dollfie BJD so I bought a dollfie head with a face-up for about $45 and bought the body (volks eb beauty) for about $45. Her face is acutally pretty natural, there's brown eyebrows, eyelashes, and her lips are just very lightly painted in a nude pink. I basically bonded with her as soon as I named her, even though I didn't have her at that point. I get attached to things pretty quickly if I name them (and I name a LOt of things, lol). When she arrived in the mail, I opened the box with my hands because I thought this was a really special package and I wasn't going to use scissors! As soon as I looked at her tiny little head sitting in the palm of my hand I was so amazed! I put her head on the body and seh looked so beautiful! She had no clothes yet but I was posing her all the time, just to get a feel for how poseable she was. Then I bought her a wig and found the Kimono for Barbie I got years ago but had never used but once on some Barbie and she looked even more like herself.

David: I fell in love as soon as I looked at his two-toned eyes! They're purple with pink in the middle. Instant bond! I thought he was so beautiful and I just had to get him! He's 45.5 cm. Other than the geta shoes, he was the only thing I bought in the dealer's room at the convention (Fanime). Everything else I got during the swap meet (so I've at least learned I can have some control). However, I had to take out a lot of money just to buy him and the bank ended up freezing my account and I had to call them to unfreeze it, lol. But I was so happy to get him! I always carried his box with me and showed him off to all my friends! Even when I didn't have clothing for him, I'd still put him in my bag and take him with me wherever I went. It was nice just knowing I had him in my presence. I feel bad but I give him more attention than I give Hatsumi. I've made him 2 outfits already and nothing for Hatsumi, even though I had her longer. lol. I still love her very much though. She waits at the computer for me, and I go online a lot so...she keeps me company at those times.

 

hime: i fell in love with bjds long before and was kind of obsessed--i stared at websites like DOD and Lutz and made plans for which doll i would get as soon as i had the money. i ended up going to animenorth up in toronto with my fiancee, and divinitydoll had a booth there. every day i would go to the dealer's room and walk past and stare, even though the only doll i planned on buying was a pullip. on the last day i begged bob to go with me to the dealer's room again so i could look one last time, but he was resistant, so i ended up basically acting like a brat, lol. finally we went and bob admitted that he had saved up enough money secretly to buy me one of the dolls. as soon as i got her i wouldn't let go of the box, i carried it to every panel despite how big it was. as soon as we got to the hotel, i opened the box and put her wig on, and it was love. i'm absolutely in love with her, and i can't go one day without fussing with her, lol.

 

that is such a cute story takeowizard! I hope I have a great relationship with my doll like all you guys do! o.o

 

I think i scare my dolls sometimes cause I cant stop staring at them, they usually try to ignore it XP

 

So what will you name your doll if it bites u when u reach in? ^after all a long trips gotta work up a appetite XP

 

This is really true; as with most things, you already form an opinion and mental image of it, but the true experience can leave you flabbergasted on so many levels. I got to experience this with my Volks SD Suiseiseki.

After all, I first thought about getting the Volks Suiseiseki because I liked Rozen Maiden and thought she was a cool character AND to have an SD-sized doll would be even more awesome. She was my first BJD, on top of that. So time went by, and I managed to find somebody who was selling her. After some thinking, I did decide on getting her, and even though she made a dent in my savings account (especially after Finnish 28% customs tax), I don't regret it, not at all!

The day came by when she finally arrived was a magic one. I didn't have time to do anything besides opening up her box when I got home, having other things I had to do that day, until late in the evening, and the since moment when I opened the box, she had given me a teaser of what dolls can be. Like a relationship that slowly develops into something other than friendship, I had the same feeling when I started dressing her. It was like giving a piece of life to her with every piece of clothes that I put on her. At first, I thought that I wouldn't name her — but I did. Sui, I decided, with the very same meaning as the kanji of her original name.

Living in a flat, a rough 30-or-so square meters big, I have only one room in my aparment (apart from the little kitchen and bathroom), which happens to be that when I get home, she might be sitting on a shelf or on the sofa. I don't know what it is, but it soothes me - her gentle face, beautiful eyes, looking, she being there, and the sheer fact that she just seems to have her own personality, makes me leave the hard day of work all behind. I think what I respect the most in dolls is their personality. Because that personality will become their soul and define them as who they are and what they do.

Even as some people might think I'm really sad and alone writing this kind of things, I personally know I'm not. I've had a lot of changes in my life lately, that have more or less turned it upside down and solved a lot of problems and turned some friendships into deeper ones, and I think this is one of the greatest hobbies that I've discovered. Me being a semi-serious amateur photographer, she makes for a very good model for photographs.

And it's all not bad either, I met my current girlfriend through her, and we're dating since 2 months back. Being really fascinated towards the doll doesn't change the fact either that with each passing day I find myself loving my girlfriend more and more. As if my life began of sorts after Sui's arrival in my life. Ironic in it's own funny way, but true in so many ways.

I hope the coming years will be as fun.

 

I love my doll ....but I have allways bin like this, I used to make bedtime for all my teddys (over 200) and I would have them in bed with me if the winter was cold. I live in a 20 sq.m apartment, so I allways have her with me. She sits with me when im on my computer, or if I watch tv...allong with all my 1/6 dolls

 

I was wondering if everyone ever not bond with their doll? I new this whole thing and don't have a doll yet but I'm worried that when I get her we may not bond. Also I wonder what are the signs to let a person know if their doll isn't bonding with them? I appreciate the help and comments.

Also while I'm at it I wonder if anyone can give this newbie tips on how to handle my doll when i get her or direct me to where I can get info on like what should I be prepared for. I mean I get so scared thinking about my first doll and doing something wrong. Hasn't anyone else?

I hope this thread is in the right place

 

I have only had him three weeks but I bonded with him the moment I took him out of the box. I cuddle with him a lot and he's always close. I also feel really bad when I have to leave him home to go to school. <__<; He still doesnt have his face up, and I'm kind of scared that he will seem like a tottaly different doll to me... because adding faceups gives a lot more personality. ^__^; I hope all goes well.

 

I love my bory to bits, i love his mold, i love his body (it's so nice to pose and hold) but for some reason i just can't seem to bond with him! I tried for 3 weeks without my other doll around, i had him sit with me and i took him everywhere. But for some reason the second my other doll came back i just went back to ignoring him. I feel even worse now my Ducan has arrived! My Bory looks so out of place, he really doesn't fit in with my family at all. I tried designing him and giving him a new name numerous times, even considered gender swapping him. Now i'm considering selling him, but i'm such a packrat i don't know if i could part with him. I'd want him to go to a loving home, but i'd fear regretting the sale.

I'm so confused right now I don't have this problem with my other dolls at all.

 

I never thought I would fall for a boy doll.
I had seen many sites bud none of the doll's I saw did much to me.
Until I saw Quinn on a website. And even then I could resist. But then I saw him in real life and I fell in love.
Many people were quite surprised that I bought him.
My best friend was not very nice about it.
And the fact that he wasn't cheap didn't help much.
Even my husband found it strange I think.
But now he sees me playing with Quinn he sees that I am happy.
And that always makes him happy.

But it all made my bonding with Quinn a little difficult.
It go's slowly but I am ok with that.
Just taking the time to get to know each other and enjoying it.

 

I had a little trouble bonding with my doll when she arrived. She was my first, and I bought her second hand. She came with the ugliest eyes ever, and I think that was the problem. Now she has really nice eyes that I bought, and It's been a few days and I already feel more bonded. When she first arrived, kinda dirty and with those fugly eyes I was like "OMG! what did I just spend all this money on!?" But now that she is cleaned up and looking more like I want her to look, I really do feel like I've made the right choice.

 

I tend to think we (some I SHOULD say, because I'm sure not ALL of us feel this way) play out some of our personality in our dolls, maybe parts we don't show in every day life... Just my take. I know It's true for me. Even though I don't have my boy yet. I can just feel it, he will be an extension of ME.

EDIT:

So yes, in a way I think we create real bonds to our dolls, I suppose like any other object or favorite toy we had as a child. I still sleep with my stuffed rabbit I got as a gift when I was 2... Yes, it's a bond.