Bonding and YOU.

I think I bonded with my doll the second she arrived, but the bond grew stronger as I painted her face, put in her eyes, picked out a wig, etc.

The new doll is a little trickier. I won't have his body until the holidays and his eyes for a few more days, so maybe that's the problem. It's hard to bond with an eyeless head.

 

when it's your first doll you bond and you look for 'true love' you start bonding before you have the money for the doll. I think you are worring unnecissarily. If it's 'love' every time you see that doll online or at doll meets, the odds are in your favor that you will not be disapointed.

 

Wow. Thank you. that has eased my worry. Yes I am constantly admiring my first doll online. I can't wait until I get her. Thank you so much for clearing that up. I'm such a worry wart.

 

I am wondering how people who initially didn't bond with their dolls managed to later bond with them? I'm having troubles bonding with my third boy, and I love his mold and would like to keep him, but I don't really feel all that attached to him. How have other people overcome this?

 

Sometimes it can take a little time. Have you tried changing his wig or eyes or trying a new style of clothes? It's amazing what simple changes can do--especially eyes in my own experience. When they eyes are off, it makes everything seem off.

Also try doing stuff with him, like holding him while you watch tv or play on the computer, if you like to take pics do a photoshoot, etc. I usually bond with my guys fairly fast, but I had one that took awhile. Now however, he's one of the ones I feel closest to--so it can work out even if it's not easy at first.

 

I agree with Taco (love tacos!) that changing the eyes, wig and clothes can do marvels. I had a character in mind for my boy, and bought an outfit for him before he arrived.

When he got here it soon became clear that he was actually someone else! I put grey eyes in instead of his default greens, got him a cream Volks wig to replace his red one...and took off the jeans and hoodie I had selected.

Today his slacks, button down shirt and tie will arrive..along with suede shoes instead of the sweet engineer boots I had selected first.

He is absolutely himself now, which makes bonding a snap.

It can also help to pattern a doll on someone you love...same hair and eye colour....maybe even style sense.

Good luck!

 

Well, if you don't have much money for those changes (like me) taking him around the house to accompany you wherever you are really helps. I must admit I had a bit of trouble bonding with my boy, as he was pretty much an impulse buy. But taking him with me everywhere (inside the house) really helped. I've had him for almost 5 months, and took him all that time to talk to me @-@, he just started last week in fact, so I had to change his profile and all XD. We're getting along now! Only thing I dislike is he pretty much believes me his slave and has become rather demanding... I need a job .

 

I had a more rocky story with my boys...

First, i got Chu my MSD Dana boy from Angel Region. I'd wanted a BJD for some time and didn't even know about DOA. I'd actually only seen them on eBay and anime forums. So when I saw Chu (who was under $600), I sprung for him. I thought he was very pretty, but back then I was a total doll noob. Plus, I was already in love with three dolls; Delf Moon, Elfdoll Red and Elf Ducan from DOT.

When he got home, I absolutely loved him. Then about a month went by and he just didn't make me excited to have him anymore. I thought this over for about four months until i finally decided to sell him. C

hristmas rolled around, and I wanted a BJD. My dad lives in LA, so we made a visit to the Volks store. At the time I had put a Dollshe Hound on hold on DOA. At the store, my dad actually offered to BUY ONE for me. They only had the two male unlimiteds in stock in the store: SD Link and SD Ryo(?). I fell in love with Link, and it took me three days to name him. Finally he became Hewitt Von Strausse. He was my little aristocrat~
However, as his character developed more, I decided that the mold that had created him no longer suited him.
Around this time I ordered a floating head: Alexander, who was a modded DiM Danbi. He was perfect for my character; certain angles he looked happy, sad, tragic, grumpy... and his hollow cheek bones and pointed chin made him look skinny.

About a month after this, I decided to sell Hewitt in hopes of getting around $1000 for him with all of his outfits and etc etc, spending $700 on a Hound, and using the extra $300 for clothes for the new Hound and then whatever was left over was to go towards my trip to Japan.
While Hewit was for sale, a couple people wanted to split him, buy just his outfit, trade a doll for him, etc etc... none of these offers really appealed to me, as he isn't really a popular mold.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, someone offered to trade their Elf Ducan partial fullset for my Link. I sprung at this offer, and a week later, Link was with his new owner, and my Ducan was sitting on my lap.
I bought him a Kimono, then spoiled him with my paypal by buying a $120 Luts outfit. Soon after, I bought him shoes~
It took me two days to name him Ilza Yazoo. Originally he was called Ilza Lazoo, but I kept accidentally calling Yazoo on the forums, so Ilza Yazoo stuck.

As of now, I'm still completely in love with him~ I need to buy him some new stuff... o3o;

 

Well, it has been a bit of a roller coaster for me, bonding-wise. But I really think (unless I see another doll that fits him better) that my doll fits my character. So, that makes me happy.

 

I'm at the "Love...but not bonding well" stage. Before I got my BJD. I had been looking at getting a Dollzone Felian. But she looked to sad for me..so one day I was looking on ebay and saw a Kid Delf Woori. Instant love! Saw the price and almost backed out till my bf told me to get him. Anyways, waited a few months and he came. Opened the box..and LOVE! Then one day I noticed that my Kazuki didn't seem to have that soft look that others do. Seems almost depressed. Which is not what I wanted at all. His name is Kazuki Momo ( means "Pleasant Peace Peach" ). Luckily the name works out for him. Anways, I have had Kazuki for about a month now and I don't feel bonded with him. I can't remove his head cap (I tried and it wouldn't even move! ), I don't like his wig ( love the color...but not how it looks ), and he seems lifeless...which is very depressing! No matter what I do with him. He just seems blank. Only once did I get him to seem happy and it didn't last. So I'm changing everything for him. Different wig, different eyes to see if that helps. I really want my little Kazuki to be beautiful and happy ( not that I don't find him beautiful now ) Anyways I hope I bond with him. Because if I end up having to sell him, which I don't want to do, thats it for BJDs for me...bf won't let me get another one. Says "one is enough. Its pointless to get another one". Hope this is just a faze and we get through this together. I truely do love Kazuki...

 

Well when Kaito first arrived I fell in love with him instantly...although things seemed a little awkward between us at first...I just felt like he was shy and that was okay, I simply brought him everywhere with me and fussed over him and what not...suddenly I realised 3 days later when we were sitting at the computer and he seemed to snuggle into me that we had completely bonded even though I didn't know everything about him yet. Now I couldn't possibly imagine my life without him, I fall more and more in love with him every day.

Now Shreddie is a different story all together. When he arrived I had nothing for him, so he sat naked without a faceup and with the wrong eyes for a few days until I had made him some pj pants, a wig and tail and given him a faceup (he was unexpected ). Still we weren't seeming to bond, even when I gave him his proper eyes. I mean sure I cared for him but nothing like my relationship with Kaito. The bonding with Shreds is a slow but steady, ongoing process and I don't think I could bear to part with him now.

It was just really interesting how I bonded almost immediately with Kaito but with Shreddie it took a little while. I'm interested to see how things will go, bonding wise, with my future dolls.

 

First doll - total and utter love at first sight, and it hasn't dimmed on whit since. (Loves my Ichigo!)
Second doll - mmm, well... he was pretty, but I just couldn't get over the vague, vacuous look in his eyes. Ended up selling him after about two months.
Third doll - he was actually a marketplace find of a sculpt I was going to originally get as my first doll, so snapped him up and it's been a nice warm fire of love ever since. Not flaming hot like my first, but he's a good solid bond.
Fourth doll - took a long time to pay him off, finally came, I liked him. Painted him up, made a special wig and clothes for him... but... he just frustrated me. No matter that he had his own fans, I just couldn't get him to act like I had wanted, so just sold him too, after about six months.
Fifth doll - bought sort of on a whim, but sold some things to afford him, and he's fun to have. Not an amazing love or anything, but he's okay.
Sixth doll - an amazing find in the marketplace again that was totally unexpected. Snapped him up fast and he's my number two boy now. Adore him! Of course, it helps that he's the same sculpt as my first doll... He's quickly challenging my affections and demanding equal time.
Seventh doll - fell in love with his face in the promo pictures, missed out on the first wave of him, got a second chance and grabbed him up - layaway. Ended up being a completely different skin tone than expected. Threw me way off. I'm getting over that now, and am kind of floundering for a "look" and personality. Not sure if he's going to make it long term, not bonding yet, and it doesn't look good.
Eighth doll - adored from afar, got chance to grab one, got one. Played with for a while, then found I can't abide open mouths. >< Sold him after a couple months and many wigs later.
Ninth doll - fell in love with head in marketplace - faceup and all. Snapped him up, and luckily got a body soon after. Still love that face. The body is fussy, but I'm working with that. We bonded right off the bat.
Tenth doll - my first tiny. Saw the picture and just had to have! Then got nervous about his size. Would I love him? Could I love him? Answer: I adore him! He's the neatest thing!

Total score right now: bought ten, sold three, with one in question. Still learning what I like and bond quickly with, and what just won't work for me.
But I'm learning if I don't bond quickly, it will just frustrate me, and after a few changes to try bonding, I need to just sell before I tear my hair out, and beat myself up with guilt.

 

I would recomend you find another CP owner near you to help you with your boy. As I rememeber the head cap on CP is 'twisted' on and off. I know they can make the locks quite stiff. Perhaps someone who can help you in person with the technical bits will make it easier for you to handle/manage your boy.

So far I haven't sold anyone as the change in eyes,wig, and face up make all the difference in the world. If you want to love your doll, you'll find a way to make it happen.

 

i do the exact same thing with London. she doesn't like being left at home when i go somewhere ... and loves going to walmart with me. :]

 

I still own my first doll.
Some other dolls I just sold after a while, because we didn't bond at all!

 

I haven't been really able to bond because I've just moved in with my father and he's so against a lot of who I am. He has said(actually I just spoke about this with him since I mentioned I was taking two with me when I go to see my mother) that he doesn't mind this hobby and thinks it's weird(who wouldn't?) and all..but I just feel awkward with them around him. Also that this has been the first 2/3 months living with him..right when I got my dolls.
They are perfect for their characters..I just haven't felt that doing face-ups and buying anything for them(which my father IS against) feels right. I love them to pieces...but they sit there and it fustrates me soooo much. I want to do more, but it always feels awkward with my father here. He works from home, so it's not like he isn't ever..not here.
And taking them places? HUGE no. Not because they were expensive(especially since I did pay for one myself, though the other was an overllly gracious gift from a family member since I said I didn't want anything for my birthday, but she had heard me mention the dolls I was saving for), but because it was inaporpriate. I can see how, I guess, but that's how it is with all my regular things. (Like wearing Fruits/Gothic Lolita/ect. clothing)

I want to bond, but I just don't know if I should. I have enough issues with him trying to get him to allow me to wear my outfits at ALL.
I'm almost thinking of dropping out of the hobby, but every time I see them I know I just *can't* because I love them so much...*sigh*

 

That is sad. Forgive the urge to give advice please. Try to be patient with your father. Have you considered getting him involved with your interests...maybe going to him and asking advice on some work you are doing on your dolls, even if you don't need his help?

Back on topic: I will have my doll (Uni Doll Elf) in early December and I feel as if I have begun bonding already over the distance. When I was looking around her face was the one which kept catching at my mind.
I wonder if it is like\dislike for collectors who display dolls and bonding\not bonding for people who are more into customizing and creating a character.

 

I'm not sure...
I have a CP Yder/f-doll hybrid and I really love him, but there seems to be something missing. He has a wonderful faceup done by a friend of mine and I would feel sorry to loose him, but I'm thinking of making him a soony boy o_O.
But first I will think about it for a whil, offcourse

 

Oh god xDD
I bonded so much with my friends Cherish doll~! !
At a meet, I was basically holding her in my arms for like... 80%
of the time. My friend was worried probably, thinking "Is he going
to run off with her? O.o"

Hahaha~! ! But I'm afraid, that I bonded so much with her little
Tiny, just wait till my boy arrives xDD​

 

I bonded right way with my first doll - total love at first sight.. my second doll was not quite the same.. his brows were low which made him look sad, making me feel sad. I had him for about two months before packing him off for a repaint.. being so far away for a time, and the new look, made me absolutley love him when he got home. I'm really glad it worked out that way but I'm hoping my next dolls aren't the same as I don't think I can afford a new doll and then a new faceup too. >_<