Bonding and YOU.

Here is my story about not bonding with a BJD.

It was around a year ago that I bought a Miyu a MSD from Volks. I'd heard about BJD'S and became caught up with wanting to have one so I went ahead and purchased her. I just want to point out that I have nothing against this actual BJD, shes incredibly beautiful and I would recommend her! It was me who was the problem. I wasn't ready to invest my time or money into having one. I sold her and managed to not lose a lot of money. The buyer was extremely pleased with her and I am confident that she is with someone appreciates her.

A year on and I've started to have an interest in them again. It started when a friend showed me the Iple House website and I saw BJD'S outside of the ones from Volks. I'm now planning to buy Freezia at the end of the month who is SD size instead. What I instantly liked about her was the older look to her. I know some people prefer the younger look but for me I now realise that was another reason I wasn't able to bond with Miyu.

You might ask if I'm worried about building up to buying her and then perhaps not being able to bond but I'm confident this won't happen. I'm in a different frame of mind and feel that I'm buying her for the right reasons. I'll have to report back once I get her

 

A happy bonding story...

I instantly fell in love with Zee straight out of the box To be honest, while I really did like the Soulkid Harang mould, I didn't yet know whether I would truly love him the way I love Gwenllian. He has fit in so well in just a day of living here and I think part of that is because he is so floppy and feels so real just sitting in my lap. He plopped down naturally and I really like the character in his face and poses. He has more of a boisterous personality compared to Gwenllian, who is more restrained, but when I posed them together, I could tell she likes him too. I'd planned for them to be brother and sister, but since there is an obvious attraction, I had to re-evaluate that choice...and since he is the BJD of my demon character, Zeelzaroth, he couldn't really be a human girl's brother!

Welcome to Zee...and I want to hear more happy bonding stories

 

My bonding with Hjalmar already started before he even arrived; when I sat down and made some clothes for him. When he finally really did arrive it was just a matter of getting him dressed up and wrestling around with his joints and head a bit. It sounds really weird but when I opened his box I saw straight away that the character I had in mind for him was fitting. It shines through eventhough he still has his old face-up/wig/eyes and clothes.

With Pavi I haven't really bonded yet. He came along as a gift and thus I had no character in mind for him. It's slowly coming after fumbling around with his eyes and making him an outfit but I'm still at loss who the hell he is and what to do with him. Maybe it's also cause his legs are a bit kicky so posing him is a drama. He tumbles over, slides down or goes into a split. So he ends up sitting somewhere against the wall while Hjalmar sits on my lap or on the couch next to me.

 

Bonding with my dolls depends on the amount of time I spend with them although sometimes it is immedite dolly love.

 

Blah most of my threads get moved

anyway

He's not some sort of "security blanket". I know many children and actually adults that are bonded to inanimate objects and cling to them for dear life.

I guess how realistic BJD's and other doll's are to a human form, our human nature will start some kind of bond. Frightful of them or having a huge interest in them.

And its okay to have that little bit of hope that your doll is aware of you.
(gives me a reason to work harder on customizing till perfection. Having a higher being coloring my face on, he better do a damn good job.)

All and all I bonded with my inanimate object. My VERY expensive inanimate object. And if anything happened to him it would be a loss of money and more important a loss of a very close friend.

 

OMG, someone moved the thread and my post got eated *sad face*

 

I just got my doll (an msd- TF Louis) earlier today. He's sitting in my lap right now, and it's actually the first time that I've even seen a BJD within like twenty feet XD. When I opened the box I was just surprised to actually see him, but now I can't stop cuddling him and playing with his hands and feet ^.^ I haven't found a name yet, but I adore him so much already.

 

Quite some time ago I had purchasede a CH AI Jun Azrael. My Aunt had had one and I absolutly loved him. She had to sell him though. I found one ebay shortly there after and immidiatly bought him. He and I didnt seem to connect well, so I was going to sell him. Before I was able to...I got pregnant, but then lost the baby. I took him back out and named him after my unborn son and cried on and held him all the time. After a while though, it became painfull to be with him. I decided to put him back in his box and try to sell him again. Nobody wanted him. I healed, and grew emotionally and mentaly. I changed a great deal over time. Then it was as though I could here him calling for me. He's a totally new person now. I dont know his name. I dont his story. Yet I feel closer to him than I ever have.

I beleive it was fate. He didnt sell, because he was supposed to be with me. Yes, it was a long road covered with bumps and pot holes, but we're together now.

Has anything remotely like this ever happened to anyone else with one of thier dolls ? The whole disconnect, reconnect thing.

 

Even though my story isnt even as close to as touching as yours, I've expeirienced the whole "not loving them".
I got my first doll back in February and I felt like I couldn't go without him. Then, around May or April I became completly diconnected. I couldn't even look at him.
Around July, I had compleltly re-invented his character (just perfected it recently actually) and changed his style. He's currently out for a face-up and I'm ordering him an outfit. With his new character, I feel much more connected and now my second thoughts on my doll seems so stupid.

 

I fell in love with a doll instantly on DoA, but when she got to my house we didn't bond at all. Twice during the next year I considered selling her, but the second time I thought about seling her, before I seriously got down to listing her on DoA I realised I just couldn't part with her. Although I hadn't bonded with her yet there was a spark of friendship there that I wasn't willing to let go. So I sat with her in my lap for a long time and finally realised that the reason I couldn't bond with her was because I had tried to force a personality on her rather than let her inherent personality shine through. I had wanted her to be cheeky and mischevious when really her character is more determined, introspective and regal. Now that I've found her real character I couldn't bare to part with her. So it took me a year to bond with her but now that I've bonded it's a very strong connection.

My newest doll, a Puki Sugar, I bonded with immediately the moment I took her from the box.

So I bond differently with each doll I guess.

 

I thought I had bonded with my girl instantly when she arrived. Although I was extremely pleased with her, There wasn't something quite right. I remember feeling slightly de-railed when I opened her box for the first time as she had a different face-up, different eyes (though I knew they were going to be random), and different [random] wig colour to how I had pictured her. Actually, she looked freakin' grumpy! She was practically unposable, like trying to bend a wire coat-hangar, insanely tightly strung, would not stand, kicky, slappy in one arm, had the knot of her arm-elastic IN her shoulder joint restricting movement and her S-hook had slipped into her neck ... unfortunately, being unexperienced in the way of the doll, I didn't realise this and she has suffered minor neck-damage due to it being there for about a month ;~;

I think she was pissed off, really XD

After a while, I managed to get a wig that I loved for her in a great colour and style *thanks Tinybear!* and some dark acrylics, changed her dress style and suddenly she was this happy glowing dolly that couldn't glare at me if she tried! We got on much better. I learned how to take care of her and re-string her, sanded and coated her, and generally felt so much more comfortable with her.

Actually, I wouldn't have it any other way now I look back! I'm glad it has taken that course rather than an instant vibe that might possibly have faded. Every time I do stuff with her - take her somewhere, play with her - I feel like I'm enjoying her presence more and more I would never be apart from her now. The only thing I'm worried about is if no other doll I get in the future would live up to her! In fact, my boyfriend warned me that I can get another doll as long as I don't ever neglect Lily, haha~ I don't think that's going to happen, but it was cute of him to say so XD

 

i usually only decide to buy the dolls i fall absolutely head-over-heels in love with, as they are so expensive. i love them right out of the box, and months later i am still discovering adorable little quirks about them.

 

At first I didn't think there was a connection, but as time has passed my little guy has really grown on me. He may be created with a wicked personality and selfish attitude, but there is something there. I feel better when I have him around. I think through time I have come to notice that even if I don't believe these objects have "souls" I think they have some sort of spirit about them. Maybe just individual attitudes created by being individually molded, but whatever it is, they are fantastic because of it.

Nanashi and I bond in a way that I believe is probably less likely for most. He never seems endearing to me, but he's always just sort of there when I need him. He's been there in the rough times, and been there to celebrate the good times. I would prefer not to be without him. He makes me happy in a way that I don't quite think is fully possible to explain. Our bond is very strong I think. I love it.

 

(sorry- double post)

 

I really didn't bond with my girl at first. I mean, she was pretty... and she had sentimental value... but no bonding. For the first few days I had the sheer excitement of finally getting her to tide me over... and she WAS pretty. But as time passed I felt increasingly frustrated, disappointed because she was supposed to be a very special gift from my dad, and just totally flat. I couldn't 'pick' a name, I couldn't 'attatch' a personality to her... nothing. There was a harshness to her that matched her standard picures but that I hadn't really anticipated in real life. She seemed cold, almost too cocky, and her eyes had no real life to them (crappy cheap acrylics). I didn't even want to look at her some days.

Fast forward a few weeks. I unstrung her totally to tighten/suede/spray her, and she had to stay that way for ages because I was without stringing-tool. In the end, I just left her in pieces on a tray on top of my wardrobe and covered her in teatowels to protect the parts from dust and sunlight. I ordered said stringing-tool and a doll carrier from Luts, and in a fairly impulsive stab at making this whole thing WORK between us, I practically pleaded with the staff at Luts to move a pair of 14mm brown glass (discontinued) eyes across to the English site so I could buy them.

They arrived, and in the space of one sunny Sunday evening I removed her eyelashes, added a random mole to her faceup for the hell of it, gave her a 'security mole' on the side of her neck in the same place as mine so I can always prove she's my girl, spray-coated her with MSC UV-cut, sueded her, restrung her and put the eyes in.

Suddenly, she's home.


I called her 'Mina' for a time; now I'm toying with 'Sunny' after the Dusty song (though she still hasn't told me her real name). She has no backstory or concrete personality either... but I'm learning that slowly. Main thing is she's mine, she's amazing, I love her and I'd know her anywhere. She has a sweet, soft, quiet nature, I think. Loves bright clothing and knitted things, and Autumn is her favourite season...

It's odd to compare her to the pictures on the Iplehouse site now (she's a Tatiana Basic). She has none of the... almost-harshness there, as I said, or the attitude that initially attracted me and that in the end, I just couldn't live with.

 

I bonded with my first doll from day one. It was something I didn't expect to happen as I was of the "how the hell can you bond with a doll?" opinion. I bonded with my second doll a while after I bought him and only after I had customised him to my own liking and not his previous owner's and the third one after I sent him for a face-up. I've still to bond with my newest doll.

 

My newest doll arrived yesterday and I've hardly put him down since. All I can say is that I really love him I haven't thought about bonding until now. I guess we have bonded but I doesn't feel the same as with my first or second doll, like way intense surges of love right from the box...and it wasn't difficult like with my third doll where it has to grow over months. I'm just really comfortable with him. It's so strange, like he's been here for years.

 

Well I was nervous about not bonding with Kaedyn because I hadn't seen a lot of owner pics of his mold, and wasn't sure if he was the "right" one and all this little nitpicky thoughts were all everywhere.

And THEN he arrived, ONE day before i had to go away over the weekend! :_: I could've put the box away but I just had to open it. Luckily, I fell in love with the mold and he was just PERFECT. I was really worried that me going away his first day here would cause potential bonding problems, but luckily, when I came back, it was just like instant-bond ^.^
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I fell in love with my Haruka (Volks MDD) right away. She is such a cute happy little girl. I realised right away though that they have their 'quirks' and being a vinyl doll with plastic skeleton she has her own pro's and cons.

Same with Louise (IH Tania). The whole not sitting thing and wobbly butt parts annoyed me no end. I was also kicking myself for not getting the mobility joint (Bit of misinformation on the forum threw me off getting it). But I realise now that I can fix that (The sitting up problem) with some simple inexpensive tweaks and I don't really miss the mobility joint as I have not had it to miss!

I love them both and have bonded well rather quickly. I just want to customize them more which is the problem. It can get expensive!

 

if this is better suited else where feel free to move it! ^-^

i have two girls and i love them but, i spend alot more of my time and money on ziva my msd, and tend to leave tomomi behind.

when i brought them i didnt really have any characters in mind, ziva devloped one, but tomomi who is her sister just hasn't. i think it is her size she is a bobobie march, has really kicky legs and is tighly strung, i have re-strung her, but it hasnt helped, because of this, i dont really do any thing with her.

i was wondering if any one else has had this problem and how you over came it?

i am thinking about selling her to some one who is more likely to use her, i am not sure at the moment.