Bonding and YOU.

All my FCS-ed kids bonded with me quite easily.
But that`s probably because I was able to choose EXACTLY what I wanted, and I had the character image already built, so Volks understood what I was looking for.

I`ve noticed that I have specific characteristics that I look for in a mold after selling 2 dolls and 1 body.

Currently the one doll I am having trouble with bonding is Mephistopheles, a White skin Swd Myu boy. I`ve been lusting a whiteskin SwD boy for so long, that I thought Mephist would suffice. Turns out that what I REALLY wanted was a SwD School A in white, and not just ANY whiteskin SwD Boy. I`ve been trying for the past 7 months to bond with him, but he`s just collecting dust :X

 

I have 2 dolls. A DIM Lloyd and a B&G Sunny. Oddly enough I found it a little harder to bond to the nicer, more expensive guy. I think it's probably because I was afraid to hurt him for a long time when I first got him. I have since loosened up and gotten over the price. Now I'm happily and closely bonded to both of them.

 

Wow, my situation is so like the OP's!

Miles was my first BJD. I had admired BJDs for a long time, but I didn't really consider getting one of my own until around this time last year... I had started reading Rozen Maiden, and around the same time, someone posted a thread about BJDs on another forum I go to. People started posting theirs and I was so overwhelmed by how beautiful they were and how affectionate eveyone sounded talking about them that I felt I really needed one. When it came to choosing which one I wanted, another owner reccommended splitting a DoD twin set to save money since it was my first one. I checked the site and conveniently fell in love with Too. And when my sister became interested in the dolls I was looking at online all the time, I explained what they were and asked if she wanted one. She was so excited when I showed her Bee-A's pictures, so it worked out perfectly for the two of us to split the set! Anyway, since it was DoD, we suffered the classic 5 million year waiting period for them to arrive. I was addicted to the waiting room thread, and everyone there was so awesome! I really enjoyed commiserating with everyone about how long it was taking, somehow. XD;;;
But... whether it was the anticipation or the fact that he was my first doll or his cuteness or whatever, I was sooooo in love with Miles at first sight when he came. His face is so adorable and sweet! And I was able to make him look even more perfect by doing his faceup myself and midding his eyes just a bit to be rounder. =] And I love cuddling him! His wig is so soft and he feels just right in my arms or sitting on the crook of my arm. And his head is just the right size for petting his hair~. He's such a good cuddler that I fall asleep hugging him sometimes. X3

As for Alastair... well, Iplehouse has always been the company whose dolls I admire most. They are SO beautiful, but of course have a price tag to match. I never thought I could afford one. So it's still surreal even now that he's at home that I was able to afford such a beautiful doll! An Iplehouse Limited! It's amazing. And I think he is so beautiful, but I definitely have the "admire from a distance" sort of feeling towards him. I wouldn't feel right cuddling him the way I do with Miles. I still love Alastair, but there's a different dynamic to my feelings toward him.

 

Anne is truly my sweetheart. She and I curl up on the couch together and I love to take her places, but when she got here she was nothing like I was expecting. I had held a 60cm doll once, but she was so big! And she was whiteskin when I was expecting a normalskin, and her faceup was completely different than what I thought it would be. The stock company photo is nothing like their actual faceups. She just doesn't look as *happy* as the stock photo, which is why I bought her. But with a new faceup now, and a lot of love, I see her smile more and more. We're very closely bonded, and I'm glad I got her.

Erin is a 10cm doll, and she was sort of an impulse buy. I wanted a tiny doll to take to class, and while I really like her, and I love taking her to class and stuff, she and I aren't as bonded as I am with Anne. I can't cuddle with a doll that small, and she's easy to overlook. But she's my 21st birthday present from my bf, so I feel rather obligated to keep her. I really, truly love her, but I kind of want to sell her and get a Soom Minigem. But I won't. With time, we'll bond. Anne is special because she's my first, and in a way, my one and only. No doll will be as close to my heart as she is.

If you're having trouble bonding, I recommend watching TV or being on your computer with your doll on your lap. Take your doll places, without a bag. Date your doll.

~AK

 

Have you made clothes for them? Maybe picking out what style of clothing they would wear or what you think would be their favorite color or fabric might help you to develop their personalities.

 

I didn't, either, for a long time. But when it happens its easy to understand. I have a big fellow in back here who I could have traded just a bit ago for a long-time wishlist doll. Can't do it. He means too much to me. Others are simply dolls and it doesn't really matter to me whether they're here or not. (no, that isn't quite right. I'd much prefer them being here! But they seem more like "nice dolls" than "he's part of me now.")

"Bonding" is a funny word to use in the hobby, because it ordinarily means an attachment between living things. But it's better and shorter and easier than a lot of the multi-word phrases we might otherwise use to describe having dolls become more meaningful to us as time goes by... or even right off the bat...than other inanimate things are.

The big drawback to using the word bonding to describe it is that if, say, you don't bond with your actual human child, you have a real problem. I can see someone starting to feel bad if they don't develop an attachment to their dolls. In reality, it doesn't matter at all as long as you enjoy having them.

Still can't think of a better word for it, though. I really can't.

 

My June (I often call her my baby June) she's my first doll. I've bought heads before, like my Kratos but she was my first full doll. I've only had her about a month and she fits here with me. I've taken her from a blank run of the mill doll and built her into my June. She's very special to me. When I first found her on ebay I liked her, I dodn't expect much from her though as I did look through the stock photos and the photos of her blank and was happy with her but didn't expect a lot. I spoke with the seller a lot and my excitment began to grow. I began picking out a charater and she began to grow. when she first arrived I had an exahsting day at work and so during the opening I didn't have the shaking in awe feeling I did with Kratos. I loved posing her though I just fiddled with posing her for hours. I still have the image of June "sunbathing" on the loveseat behind my boyfriend. I think posing her began the bonding process. I started to come up with a new charcter for my girl though she was running round nude. The second part of the bonding process was finished when her clothes came. She started comming to life then. she's not complelty done but with every step she's becoming more and more my June. My first Mini

Kratos, my manly man, the first even doll peice I've ever gotten. He is special in the way that he's been built from the ground up. I got him as a head, got his eyes, and recently bought his body. When I first opened his box I instantly loved his blank sculpt. His adorable nose and ears were my favorite parts about him. It'll be interesting to see how he grows. He's also my first SD

Gaberiel is just a head so far. I came about him herre on DOA and fell instantly in love with him. He's a nanuri '07 head with a custom face, slightly yellowed. I came across others but they were just eh...I've always wanted a vampire and his faceup and eyes seemed to excite me, so I contacted the seller and bought him up. He's in the mail right now, so I don't have him yet but it'll be good to see how he fits. My second SD

I'd love to have a female SD but I don't seem to find any to suit my style or wants. After searching I'm starting to feel surprised June made it to me. lol but if I went by her stock photos June would never have been here...*sigh* we'll see how that goes lol

 

i never interest in any doll before... right after i saw Hinata i just love her!
Buying her used only second in my thought... well that's kind of scary way to use money! but no regret XD

 

So last summer I got my first bjd, Shota. Since then I've kind of gotten away from everything doll related. I like him, but I feel like I shouldn't have him since I hardly play with him at all.
I was talking to my mom about selling him, but she said I couldn't because I, 'loved that doll'.

So here I am, asking how exactly do I fall back in love with my boy? xD; I kind of want to trade him, but I'm also looking into getting a new wig + eyes for him.

Any help is welcome. ^^

 

Well, Hisui didn't come to me until yesterday, and being an assembly kit I had to put her together myself (ACK), and considering she's my first bjd it was quite the headache. However, I feel much closer to her than I think I would have if I had purchased her already made (which, isn't possible. lol). I feel closer to her knowing that I covered her naked body up with a sock (LOL) to keep her warm, and how I squealed when her clothes came in, and took care of her that day even though she looked like a bald rehab patient. I wouldn't give her away for the world now, and I know we have even greater memories to come.

 

When I decided that I wanted to buy my first BJD I searched for a very long time until I came across the Luts website. It was there that I first saw SDF Cian, and it was love at first sight. xD I ordered him and waited a long time for him to come. When he came, I tore open the box and remember holding him and feeling so happy. It was amazing. After that he became part of my life, and I love him more every day. :3

 

Oh, the joy of bonding.
It actually was a really weird experience for me. I ordered him because he was perfect. Of course, when I ordered, I had never even seen a BJD in real life. I didn't know what I was getting into. They didn't seem material. xD But I was so anxious to get him, and I was practically exploding when he showed up. I was really happy when I pulled him out of the box.
It wasn't until my friend went home and I was alone in my room that I really looked at him.
And I wasn't happy.
I thought his face-up was wrong (as it turns out, it wasn't... I just was looking at things wrong) and there was a white spot above one eye. The more I looked at him, the more I was like "Ya know... this doll isn't Oliver." I ended up shoving him back in his box and crying.
Later on, I pulled him back out, and really started appreciating his beauty. I loved the doll, but he just wasn't right. I carried him around with me and tried my hardest to bond with him... but one day, it just clicked. I could never sell him. He was mine and he was Oliver. Oliver was him. And there was nothing that could change that. I'm super attached to him now. I hold him all the time, he's always next to me, and I'll drag him around the house with me all the time. I don't think I could ever part with him. xD

 

I feel like I've posted here before, but my history says I haven't, so...
Bonding is weird for me. I love my dolls a lot, but I don't have much time to play with them, so I don't feel too "close" to them the way a lot of people seem to. I think this has a lot to do with the fact that I live in a dorm and only take them out when no one is around so they are safe (only a few hours a week). And when I am at home, my room is very small and very bright, so I only really take them out after dark, which is very late in summer! I'm looking forward (a LOT) to having my own apartment next semester so they can have their own little area!!!
The bottom line is that I'm not nearly as tight with my dolls as people seem to be. I do find that I am closest to my MSD, which has made me decide to stop buying more tinies (still keeping my sweeties, of course). Maybe some day I'll buy an SD. I find that her being larger makes her easier to hold and cuddle. My pukis can only sit in my palm! XD

 

Trying things like different wigs/eyes/clothing styles might really help. Sometimes something as simple as a pair of eyes can make a doll really click. Maybe there are some activities that you would enjoy doing with him that you haven't tried? Like sewing, photography, writing etc.

 

Angelkitty wrote: "Date your doll."
I think that is adorable! (And take pics, too

 

With my first girls, Yuki and Sae, it was instant bonding. It took so much saving and planning that I had already bonded with them before they even arrived. When I got Ryuu, I didn't have enough time for him and having Akira - my long-time dream - so suddenly, just about a month after him, he was just sitting on my shelf with a lonely expression on his face. With Akira it was the same as with Yuki and Sae, so much waiting so I loved her already. No problem with girls so far.

Bonding with Ryuu took one beautiful photoshoot somewhere on this spring. Suddenly I just loved him so much

Rin is such a new member of my family, that I can't really say much about her, but I fall love with her more and more as time goes by.

 

I love reading everyone's take on this.
My doll's characters are already built, and so far I've known immediately upon taking the sculpt out of its box whether it was right for the character or not. Seriously bonding can be a bit wonky for me though. I'm super attached to my blank md Jina head, but wandered around all evening with my sm Namu feeling sort of distant from him (he's complete aside from 'the' wig). As soon as I tried a different pair of eyes in him it was perfect, now he's sitting in my lap as I type and couldn't be more perfect.

 

I don't have many problems bonding with my dolls - as soon as I get them in mail (or sometimes even before) they're telling me about their personalities and how they like things, and so on and so forth. I may not be the type of person who constantly has my doll near me - for example Marcheline has been hibenating in her box except for one outing on Sunday since she came in the mail last week.

She's quite happy with that situation since she's still bald and naked. She's also happy about because she knows that regardless of where she is - either on display or hiding happily in her box, I still feel the same way about her amazing gorgeousness.

I have two dolls incoming, both of whom I love already, and will only like more once I'm able to get them out of the box and marvel at their random eye colour and fantastic outfits - I'm one of those people who will enjoy the eye colour regardless... unless they INSIST on having something different.

 

I had a problem bonding with my puki.But after I fixed up her loose faceplate, she seems more approachable to me! I find myself loving her more and more!

 

Ok, so the doll I'm MADLY in love with is Orientdoll Il. Every time I look at a picture of him (even with faceups I really don't like) I go "WAAAANT..."

The doll I own, however, is a Bobobie Isabella. Who... I was not planning on buying. I was just sorta futzin' around the JunkySpot stall at Fanime a couple weeks ago, asking questions because I've been wanting a doll for so long and haven't been able to handle so many (that was fun, handling so many dolls) and was looking at the Bobobies they had right up front... They had two boxes full of their 15cm dolls, little assorted $80 babies... I was looking at those for a while, because they're FRIGGEN CUTE! (the woman behind the desk was all like "They're like candy" cos you can't get enough of them. I believe it!) but anyways... Then I looked next to it. At the time, I didn't know I was looking at Isabellas and Marches, but I knew I liked the Isabella sculpt quite a bit and was looking at a Green Skinned one when I saw this flash of white...

I carefully unburied her, and there she was. My Liera. Within 45 minutes (my first 45 minutes at con, in fact), 2/3rds of my Fanime budget, I bought Liera, and had absolutely no regrets. I bought her an MSD sized t-shirt in the artist's alley which was kind of hilarious, but I didn't want to have her have to be naked, and my friend who I was with was like "OK... you can uh, carry that around con, but when we go grab dinner, put it away please?" He didn't think it was creepy in general, but he thought it would be creepy to walk around in public with her. xD (I kept showing him her vagina to fluster the hell out of him. I am so cruel to my doll! And maybe my friend, also!)

But yeah. I had no intention of buying her, except there was that instantaneous connection. >.>