Bonding and YOU.

I liked my Heliot out the box. It ment nothing to me to leave him in a cuboard while I went away, traveled ect. but this wasn't so with my others- my Moon I missed sorely when I couldn't turn to see him, and my Sabik got dragged around with me as I moved around, for his oddly lanky, wobbly, impossible to find clothing for, difficult self is like resin drug for me.

Something just never sat "right" with the Heliot untill I decided to clean him [jeez that whiteskin can get smudgy] up ready for when I can muster the will to sell him- and I changed to his sleepy-eyed head and strapped his hooves on and de-wigged my Sabik and placed it on the heliot "just for fun"...the peices fell into place. I also now need a second version of said wig but this is something else completely in and of itself!

I guess in some convuluted way I echo what has been said- the emotional investment a doll can take on, as opposed to just liking it, is something not always predictable and I reckon what is ment by bonding. Atleast, that's how I feel on the matter.../rant out

-Salvagore

 

I normally have to get them just the way I like them before we bond. Exactly how I picture the character in my head is how I put them together. At that point I start bonding. It took a few days to bond with my first two boys, but my third is just beautiful and he clicked as soon as I put his wig on. ^.^

 

Nola - My Obitsu Gretel and very first doll, I got her second hand from my girlfriend. She sported my first-ever face-up, which even looking back on it now, I feel some measure of pride. Or it could be nostalgia for the previous year. ^^; I started really bonding with her when we got her wig, and she just exploded into her character. My girlfriend and I took our girls downtown, to Wal-Mart, and to the mall. Unfortunately, the main joint in her body snapped, so she sits on top of the TV waiting for us to have the money to replace her body...

Haven/Daisuke - I fell in love with him the moment I saw him for sale on another forum and had to have him! He arrived about a week and a half before Christmas, and the day after an ice dump (not to mention the day I was supposed to leave for a big trip and postponed due to weather conditions). I was so excited when he arrived and just couldn't stop playing with him, torturing him with different wigs to see which he seemed to prefer. Since I'd just got him, I took him with my on my trip to see my family and be there for my nephew's birth. It turned out to be a really bonding week for all involved (me & family and me & Haven) and I was able to at least get his name and a paltry backstory. But through the whole trip, there and back, he sat right beside me, tucked up in his jacket, and buckled safely in, listening to me spill my heart to him...

 

Everything you just said it's true!!! At least in my case. I can't bond with a doll when I can't find a name for them and their style.

This happened with my Rosiel, he arrived with the company face up which was horrible so I never took pictures of him and he didn't inspire me to do anything. I didn't enjoy taking pictures or buying him new clothes and I even put him up for sale on the marketplace. However, I liked his mold a lot so i decided to change his face up and immediately contacted a popular face up artist from this forum. I gave him a chance but I really didn't have my hopes up for him.

Suffice to say, when my Rosiel came with his new face up, he was a completely new doll, I fell in love with him at first sight!!! he immediately acquired a new style and attitude and became, all of a sudden, the perfect doll I was aiming for! I love taking pictures of him now and I'm so glad i decided to give him a second chance 'cause I love him to bits!! he's the one that inspires me the most now (besides kyoshi).

Then, I have another case with Hayden (my tender too) I'm even thinking of selling him because I don't enjoy taking pictures of him and he just doesn't inspire me to do nothing with him. I see him as a doll only and not like my other boys who have a personality and background. That's because I can't find his proper eyes, I don't know his style and personality and I really dislike his fur wig and his name (I don't like the name "hayden" but I really can't find another name for him) I don't see anything wrong with his face up, I think that's the only thing I like about him. I want to bond with him but I can't >.< the same story with Rosiel is repeating itself but I just don't want to try nothing with hayden, I don't want to spend money for new wigs or eyes for him *sighs*

So yeah, if a doll doesn't inspire to at least change his looks, that means we're not bonding.

 

I bonded with Renny before I even had her in my arms. I saw her online, fell in love, and then when I ordered her, I started the emotional/mental bonding process. Then when I held her for the first time it was AWESOME. I absolutely adore her. She actually sleeps in the bed with me, wrapped in a thin flannel sheet so that my skin oils don't accidentally get on her if I roll over in the night.

 

So do I. Ryn sleep with me and I try to get him every where I can..
The most the time passes, the more I'm afraid to lose him..
I'm so happy seeing his face every morning..^^

 

I'm getting my Luts SDF Eveline in October, I've already ordered her, and now, reading this, I'M SO SCARED I won't bond with her!!!
Eeeeek

 

I don't agree.

I've had several dolls over the years that I *liked* very much, both in advance of purchase and as a doll in person. And yet they never grew to have any particular ... meaning, I guess... for me. I did not blink twice when the time came to pass them along to someone who would appreciate them more. Doesn't mean I didn't like the dolls. (A good example is the one Bambicrony elf I had for a short time. Gorgeous thing. Adored looking at her and still love looking at her pictures. Beautifully engineered doll. But... we didn't click.)

I have other dolls that I don't do SQUAT with. They just sit here and look purdy. But it would be like cutting off a limb to part with them. That's "bonding".

It isn't really the right word for the phenomenon, for sure. Actual bonding is something that takes place between living creatures. But it is a wonderful shorthand for something that probably happens in the non-verbal right half of our brains, and thus doesn't lend itself to easy explanation. If we, as a community of hobbyists, have come to use the word "bonding" in a non-standard way that has a generally understood meaning, well, what's wrong with that? It happens in most specialized fields, to the point where outsiders or people new to the area go "WTF? Exsqueeze me?"



PS. Tigerbaby:

Hilarious. The space for rent or lease gets larger as you get older, too... "what wuz that again? Uh... who cares."

 

Is it possible to bond with a doll (or i should say doll sculpt) before you ever even see it off the internet? I was searching the web when i came across a dd yukino and i just fell in love lol. I have looked at every doll site imaginable and they were either wayyyyy to expensive (and i could never spend that much on a doll) and i didn't give them a second look, or they were way not my my style. but when i saw yukino i knew i had to have her and im loving that every photo i look at (no matter who owns the doll) she looks identical to the promo photos =D which to me means she will not be a disapointment lol! im saving for her and she is currently my fav screen savor (heehee small obsession)

 

It's happened to almost everyone at some point...and i just recently experinced it with my first doll, Spooky. I've had him since September...and we just aren't clicking. So anyone who has been or is in this situation can post here, cause I feel horrible right now

 

My first (and not only if I have anything to say about this) is a Tobias from Fantasy Dolls. I had looked around for a while and I just fell in love with him. I'm planning on getting him a sister this spring. and possibly a boyfriend in the fall.

 

i had loads of trouble bonding with my dauphine (AOD ziyuan) because she didnt have the face-up i expected, she was taller than what i imagined, etc etc. BUT i dunno what happened, we just clicked and becane best friends ^^ so far she has 1 baby brownie which is my spoilt lil brat, and a DragonDoll Ming husband, who is gorgeous with his silver eyes and silver hair. Currently, to help me bond more, Dauphine is having a new face-up so she looks more "human"

 

you are so lucky...I hope i can bond with the new head..if i ever get it. i'd feel bad keeping a doll i'm NOT bonding or bonded with I feel like such a horrible owner now....

 

I had the bonding issue with my AOD Qing, Indigo- infact when I got her, I left her in the box for a year (whilst finishing my degree) without feeling bad about it even in the slightest. It was only when I got her out and really looked at her face and body I realised that I was in love with her body and jointing (old body aod) just not her face-up.
Taking that off and her HUGE eyes out were the first real steps to bonding properly. (It had me quivering in a corner of the room going aaaaghhhh! What if I couldn't do it properly again...? But actually, her new face-up and body blushing and a new wig, eyes, and clothing (I made the dress... not the wig and the eyes..) have all caused me to think that she's the doll I couldn't do without. She might not be perfect or new or even pose that well (she can stand on one leg though!) but she's mine.
I know that when I get my next doll (Christmas *grin*) I'll know that for me to bond, I need to do things with the doll, rather than look at it on the shelf.
If that makes sense have a cookie.

 

I fell in love with my dolls much later than they arrived. The first one got to me accidentally (Hong), the second was abandoned for several months before I started to worship him (Cycas) - and now I love him more than all of them. Something like that happened to all of them. So I really do not know why I bought them (if I did not really like them at that time), but I definitely know why I keep them. They make my life much more beautiful, each of them and all of them

 

Sometimes I feel like I rushed too much into my first BJD purchase and I was a little disappointed. I believe that if anyone feels they're "not bonding", give your doll another chance - get a different wig and new eyes, change up their personality, redo their face-up. If that doesn't bring you any closer, I think they could go on to another person. On the other hand, I saw my KDF Cherry and instantly knew I loved him. It all depends what dolls give you that feeling in your stomach that let you know they're the one you want!

 

Oh my, where to START.

Henry was my first, and still very special. I look back and think I rushed in. I didn't get the doll that immediately grabbed me, but the doll I could afford. I know dollie fandom tends to call this a big nono, but it wasn't like later with Matilda where I had steady income and COULD save for my dream doll. but when he got here, I instantly fell in love. I spent so much time with him next to me or holding him in my arms. It was amazing. He's actually not very cuddly, as he's a bit stiff. But I loved him so much, and he had such a warm and cuddly personality. ^^;

Matilda was the first doll I saw and immediately knew had to be mine. I loved this girl the instant I saw her. And even after giving myself plenty of time to think it over, my heart still fluttered when I saw her face. *w* And when she got here, it was..it was amazing. XD She was so different than Henry. She was very lightly strung and cuddly, but still posed well. I ended up bonding with her, oddly enough, much less with holding and cuddling and more just making things for her.

I still love both of them, and they're with me pretty much all the time. xD;

 

That might be a bit similar to bonding and you but there bonding is generally talked about.

I want to know from those people who bond with their dolls how they do it.
I for example like taking them apart and washing them to clean them from resin dust and "get to know" their body. Also I begin making clothes and taking photos to let the new doll fit into my existing group. And since I don't order body-blushing any more and got some completly blank I can also spend time doing face-ups and blushing.
While doing this I get to know my new doll, her posing abilities which reflects in the character and also I create her for a little part myself.

So what do you do for bonding with your doll? ^^

 

So what do you do for bonding with your doll? ^^

When my Genji arrived, the first thing I did was to try him in every wig and pair of eyes I owned. It's hard to explain, but when I finally put in a certain pair of green eyes and slapped a black wig on his head it was like, "Oh, THERE you are!" Something just clicked and I suddenly knew that he liked English Breakfast Tea and enjoyed mystery and suspense novels. LOL

 

If it's a blank doll, I work on the face-up & actually will often do enhancements even on dolls complete with a face-up. I have to like the face-up in the first place but sometimes things need bumped up a little. Otherwise I pose & play with them nekkid for a while just to see what they'll do & immediately change eyes as I prefer eyes with more iris detail than most default eyes have. After that I try on all sorts of clothes & wigs to see what fits & goes well with their new eyes & resin tone. Usually by then a name has come to mind & the beginning of a character so all that's left is adding them to my database & finding other dolls that they fit with well for display. They join the herd & become part of my little world.