Bonding and YOU.

I guess it takes a while for me to bond

I've had Ani for a year and I only recently truly bonded with her

 

I'm kind of weird with bonding, sometimes I take a doll out of the box and I just KNOW that it's perfect and that they're exactly what I want them to be, even before I paint them or put their wigs on. When I got my Ryu I only had his head sitting around for a few months and I still carried his head around and sat it on my desk while I worked. In contrast to that I've had my first doll for two years and I've only just (partially by amazing chance) gotten her to where I wanted her after changing of wigs, eyes, face ups, "personalities", and styles. She looks completely different from what she started as, but I feel like this is what I wanted from the start. So bonding for me is something that is either instant, or takes such a long time that most people would give up and sell the doll like a sane person instead of guilt tripping themselves so much they have nightmares about the doll's face melting off. True story.

 

The face. I fell in love with her face and knew she was the one for me. And since I've gotten her, I've hung out with her a lot. I've taken her to Uwajimaya, driven in the car with her (I even buckled her in....) lol! She's even helped drive. I'm crazy But it's like having a child. And that how I think of her. She's like my daughter. ^^;;

 

I've been pretty good so far at judging dolls before I buy them. I bonded with Cuprit immediately - she was exactly what I'd been expecting from her promotional pictures.

Cheshire took a little longer, because his face-up was quite different from what his promotional photos showed. Eventually I decided to wipe his face-up and 'fix' it, and even though I haven't actually done it yet, it's certainly helped me bond with him.

Cass and Chrom are both still just heads and parts, but I'm already sure I'll bond with them once they have bodies. Their face-ups fit their characters perfectly, and so far face-ups are the only thing that 'get in the way' of me bonding with a doll.

I'm a bit anxious about Amber (who will be my first head without a face-up) and my Galena (who will be my first greyskin doll). I'm confident that I will bond fine with Amber if I can get the right face-up on her. And I'm hoping that I'll bond alright with Galena if I get her in the right wig and outfit.

 

I was shell shocked over the cost when I first purchased my BJD (Volks SD13) and didn't really know if I had made a very huge expensive mistake. It was about only about 6 1/2 weeks till she arrived and even looking at her in the large box didn't do it for me.

When I got her out, put her eyes in, wig on and dressed her she suddenly became a person and I couldn't quit looking at her... I fell right in that minute. Now every month I give her a brand new look with new eyes, wig, clothes & Accessories and I fall all over again.

 

I've bonded with Ollie pretty much immediately. I've had him for a couple of days and it's nothing short of amazing. It amazes me so much.

 

aiden: typical love at first sight thing. woosoo are my dream doll (hes a MNF though). hes SO cute i cant stop looking at him. hes the doll i could never sell (even though i hate his size)

seth: received the body before the head. yes, i did fell in love anyway XD he was my first SD and i was playing with him, testing his pose ability, etc. i bathed him (i bought him secong hand). he was perfect size to hold then i received the head. SO gorgeous! but i didnt know what to do with this doll. i felt i was wasting my time with him. eventually i unbounded and sold him )':

 

I swear I've posted here before .__.;;

For Tamar my Shoyo, it was pretty easy. She was the first, and that automatically made it easier. I wouldn't sell her ever.

For Dart my Mo, it took a little longer. I wasn't so sure about this DollZone tan skin. I wanted normal, but when I ordered through the dealer it didn't have it listed as an option. So I just took a chance. I didn't like the tan skin or the faceup at first. His lips looked different. But after about a year I changed his style and faceup and now I love him.

My other dolls are all pretty easy to bond with, in their own ways. ^^

 

I know a lot of threads out there deal with how to bond or what to do if it's not happening but I've yet to find anything discussing when you just KNOW that it's not going to happen. Where and how do you get to the give up point? Is it a time thing? Money? Character? I've got my own personal recount below but I'd like to hear more on it.

I've had my first doll for a year now and yeah...it's just not happening. I've bought clothing, wigs eyes etc tried the faceup/body blushing etc. thing and she's still just 'My First Doll'. Now I wasn't phased by this 'give it time right?' until I got my second doll, and we clicked. He's been home four months and I've taken him out more in that time than her year. o.O He makes me smile every time I see him even without that perfect face up and perfectly styled wig. It's just him!

Naturally I kinda started thinking about selling the first doll. Of course I'm hesitant, she's my first after all, and I find her lovely and charming etc. but we just don't sit well together. At the same time I do adore her, surely it'll get better right? A year is so short in the face of time *coughcough*

So, is a year too long to wait? what's the longest has it taken you to bond with a doll? What do you think effected that? If you waited ages and it finally clicked what did it?

 

When I look at the marketplace a lot. If I'm continually searching for "WTB" threads for the doll I am thinking of selling, I put one and one together and list that sucker on the market. There isn't a timestamp on it, or any routine I must go through. Once I stop liking the doll and want to own a different one more, I sell it.

 

I think if you haven't bonded by this time, you probably won't. It took me a week to bond with my first doll because I was scared to touch her. Not everyone gets it right the first time, so why make yourself believe you have to. Look around, see if there's another doll you want more and let yourself let the first one go.

 

It's like looking at water. Some water is deep and some is pretty shallow, but it's hard to tell without stepping into it.

Some dolls will give you a great depth of relationship and inspire you forever. Some only have a little to give, and then you pass them along to someone who might release more of their potential.

If you're looking at the doll and coming up dry, then it's time to say goodbye.

 

I just received my very first bjd. I had some problems with her when first seeing her even so she has started to wind her way around my heart.

 

At first when i got Alice, I loved the way she looked. Though it was difficult at first cuZ i had no idea how to make clothes or anyhting for her since i had only very basic sewing knowledge. I have spent every after for the past 2 weeks working on her, and i might as loved her when i first got her, or thougth i did, but now i am just completely attached, she used to just site on my shelf looking pretty. Now she comes to work with me, and either sites in my lap or right next to my computer desk :3.

So i'd say working with her and making her new outfits and doing her face- up really helped us bond. Though i am still really new to all this, she doesnt exactly have a personality yet. But still there is just somethign about her...

 

This thread has become seriously huge... when threads get over around 1000 posts, they start to take a long time to load and become a drag on the database.

I am going to close this thread, but please feel free to restart.