Buying second hand

This has been bothering me for some time, but I'm not sure I can explain myself correctly.

First I want to say that there's nothing wrong with pre-owned dolls. I don't want anyone to think that this is a slam against them. I know that they're in perfect condition and are every bit as good as 'factory new.'

I have several really old composition dolls, 50 to 80 years old, and that's what you call used! I love looking them and have made clothes for them, but I don't 'play' with them. They have names, but beyond that they are just dolls. I've never given much thought to who owned them or what kind of history they have, basically because they don't have personalities. They're just 'pretty things' that I enjoy having around.

I discovered BJD's only a few months ago. I read DOA like it was the bible! I've read about doll personalities and bonding and I came to understand the concept. I don't have my doll yet, but I already have his 'story' in my head and the concept of what he'll look like and what his personality will be. I'm ready to have a BJD because I can appreciate the love and companionship that I'll enjoy with him. I think you all know what I'm trying to say.

I've seen several dolls offered on Ebay that are not new. I'm sad that someone has decided to part with them, but I know they have their reasons. Now, if they were any other kind of doll I wouldn't think twice about it, but because they're BJD's I get the weirdest feeling. I'm not sure if I could buy one. It's not that I couldn't love them and it's not that someone else has owned them first. I'll try to explain. I think I would always wonder who this doll was. I would look at him (or her) and think, "Who are you? What experiences did you have in the past? What was your life like? Who did you love? Were you happy? How were you treated? What have you learned? What are your likes and dislikes? How will I ever get to know you if I don't know who you are?"

A new doll is a blank slate, but a pre-owed doll has a personality imprinted on them. I'm not saying that they can't be given a new persona, but I would always wonder. Could I do him justice with my attempt at making him something else? It just sounds like an overwhelming responsbilitiy.

It's sort of like getting a dog from an shelter. You give the dog a new name and he gets used to it, but if he hears the name he had before he answeres to it. Does this make sense? I could give the doll a new name and a new story but the old one would always be there.

These dolls are given so much love and attention that I'm not sure I could just take a doll away from it's owner and the only 'life' it has ever known and expect it to be happy with me.

Does anyone understand what I'm trying to say? How do other people feel about this?
I'd really like to know.

Thank you for reading this LONG post!

 

Hmm.

I understand what you mean. I like the idea of having a preowned doll, but I'd feel bad knowing someone else had loved them before... it's not exactly selfish, like I want them all to myself... it's just a strange feeling.

Like you said, I wouldn't know whether I could live up to their personality, or if they would live up to my expectations... or turn out to be someone else.

I'm also buying one to mod, so I'd be sort of anxious about building on, removing, or changing someone else's work.

 

I own a preowned doll and a from the store doll and while I love them both, the preowned one is the one I cuddle with. It's strange, the store doll gets all the clothes but the preowned I cuddle and hug and play with the most. I don't know how the preowned's personality was or anything, but his personality seems stronger and brighter then the new, he seems to know how to absorb and emit love better then the store one.

 

I have several adoptions, and I love them all. It makes me feel good to be able to give them a home, no matter what the circumstances of their parting was. I do tend to keep their names the same (if they had one), because that is part of who they are, but often they will get a new appearance. Honestly, though, whenever I am considering a doll, I always look to adopt first if I can.

 

I understand what you're saying. I feel the same way actually... I'm just glad that most of the dolls I want are not limiteds which means that I CAN get them new. I would feel wrong trying to turn one into one of my characters because I'd feel like it wasn't really them.

 

I am adopting one, but I barely know his personality. So it's like he is new to me. He has already told me some about himself, so we're good. ^^

And one I want I will have to get used.

 

:grin: i kinda feel that way too but alot of the VOlks dolls i like are limited and unfortunatly already WAY past selling date so i dont have much of a choice. LOL Darn the limiteds!

 

They're just dolls. resin you know? If you have the imagination to create a 'real' character out of a lump of resin then surely you have the imagination to make a doll fit that, whether they're pre loved or new?. The two I have owned so far were both pre loved, I have enjoyed them for what they are, I know my version of the dana I have is quite a few years younger than the previousowners version, but she's mine, not hers so that is all that matters. I really can't relate to any of this previous personality problem. They have been welcome additions to my household but they are just dolls.. I mean sure I named them, repainted them made them mine, had scenarios and storylines in mind for who they were, but the fact they had some kind of previous life doesn't bother me at all, they arrived at my doorstep with a clean slate.

Like what is the deal? you're worried you might have to foot the bill for your new volks pre loved dollfies therapy sessions with a shrink because she's having an identity crisis? Or maybe you're worried there is some deep dark secret that you have no idea about like your new boy is still wets the bed or has some kind obsession with toes remaining covered at all times.

p.s My Tillie just wanted everyone to know she does not wet the bed, but she did accidentally spill her glass of water on her sheets one night soon after she had arrived and was still a bit unsure about the house layout

 

I don't know about the originator of this thread but personally... to me.. It's not like I'd feel that the old personality was there, just more like I'd killed it... If I changed the personality of a doll into one of my characters I'd feel like I'd killed the previous personality. I dunno if that makes sense. I have an odd way of viewing things sometimes.

 

These dolls are given so much love and attention that I'm not sure I could just take a doll away from it's owner and the only 'life' it has ever known and expect it to be happy with me.

I'm going to answer this from both sides.
First of all I have a doll on ebay right now. You are certainly not going to take the doll from anyone! If it's being sold then there is a reason. My reason is a good example because it's one I hear in most cases of selling. Me and my boy just didn't bond. I have two other boys that I adore. And I found this doll to be beautiful to look at. But he never developed a personality to me and seemed so empty. It makes me sad for him. I see him sit there day after day and I never feel compelled to play with him like my other two. So I decided I would be happier and so would he if he went to a home where someone he could open up to was around. I would love for him to have a happy home. But he won't have that here. I've tried.
And from the other side
I actually agree with what JaDE_rUst said. My first boy was from another home and we bonded straight away. He was bubbling with personality the second he came out of the box. My other boy was brand new and we didn't hit it off at all. I almost sold him. I adore him now but it took alot longer and alot more work. So I'm rather partial to pre-owned dolls too. And when I look at my boy I can't imagine him as anything other than mine. It never really crossed my mind who he used to be because he told me who he was from day one. But I assure you I did have the same concerns as you in the beginning. They just vanished though when I saw my boy for the first time.
I hope I helped! :grin:

 

I only have one BJD....a darling DD with an Obitsu head that I had named Kira, but...due to this feeling I had, changed to Rika...

She was pre-owned. I don't know if her previous owner is a member here or not...I literally know nothing about her...I don't even know what type of eyes she has! (or how to restring her, or change eyes....I'm a newbie.)

I do have this wonder about what her personality was like before she came to me, and I do worry that I'm trying to make her some character that she's not...but then I realize, she's now my angel to take care of...so, her life is now what I make it...if that makes sense at all.

I think it's great that she was pre-owned though...just because, it gives her a sort of mystery...and a clean slate at the same time.

Just my $0.02

Lara

 

I think there are varying levels of personalities in dolls. Sometimes someone will buy a doll, see it, and know it's not right for their character. Therefore, when you buy this doll, it's basically like new (though it has a bit of history because it's been somewhere that wasn't home).
There are some dolls that sell after years of play and personality. Some dolls are bought to paint and sell. Some are played with for a day, put in a box, and sold a few weeks/months later.
You have to kind of feel the energy of the specific doll you're buying. Do you like the vibes you're getting from him/her? Stuff like that...

 

You know, I never really thought about it like that before.

I only have one preowned doll. He's actually the second doll-incarnation of that particular character, and the first few weeks after he came home (again) I felt like there was this huge, unbearable wave of sadness radiating off of him. I tried to ignore it. Finally I just sat down, and hugged him, and said, "What's wrong?"

Now, I know, he's a doll. And technically a doll can't burst into tears. But essentially, whether I projected it or imagined it or simply heard it, he said, "I was alone." And he cried. And then it was better.

So my theory is this -- whether the dolls come with preowned personalities, or none at all, they will gradually become your own as time goes by. Sort of like a mood ring, changing colors -- it doesn't stay blue, just because the last person who wore it had cold fingers, and it doesn't remember or feel sentimental about hands before yours. It just turns red, responding to your temperature.

 

This would depend on the new owner's thoughts on dolls, whether dolls have feelings, and whether dolls have souls I think.

I get dolls where I can. I usually like getting them new because I don't like having to worry about anything when they arrive, and I like them ready to be played with immediately. But I have bought 2 of my dolls from a owner and not new, and I love all my dolls the exact same. My first doll (that I keep of my current bunch, not of the ones I'd sold in the past) I have a special bond with because he was my first Dear. But still, I think all dolls have the potential to be loved the same.

 

I personally feel like, as long as the doll has been kept in good condition, that there is absolutely no qualm for me in buying a used doll.

I think that the personality of the doll comes from the owner, and so when it goes to a new person, that it reflects the new owner. obviously the old doll and owner combination didn't work out for whatever reason. These dolls are made to be appreciated and enjoyed. if they aren't enjoyed by one person, I'd rather they be enjoyed by another.

just think about what this doll means to you, and how you think their personality is. I don't think that it should concern anyone what the previous owner thought it was.

but that's my 2 cents, everyone feels differently!

 

Aimee's response is much like what I was thinking.

There are varying degrees of owner involvement with their dolls. It was discussed in a thread called You and your doll's relationship

Some people may roleplay with their dolls, and some may appretiate them mainly as craft projects.

Essentially, once you have a used doll - your perception of it is entirely up to you.

 

My first BJD (I only have one, I want to save up for more) is a pre-owned one, but I still love her. I can't really see her as having any other name besides "Camille" and the day she arrived and I opened her box and put her wig on, I did fall for her. I know she's just a doll and not even "made" just for me, but I can't help but make her "comfortable" (letting her sit on stuffed animals or something soft or having her sit on my knee to watch me draw on the computer.

...But yeah, that had vaguely something to do with the topic at hand. xD;;

 

I actually hunt down some pre-loved dolls because I specifically liked them. I even kept their names when I got them. One has actually been through three names before arriving here, and has gone back to her second name.

Ken

 

I Have had new dolls and dolls on the secondary
to be honest Im a bit more attatched to my secondary dolls , they were dolls I considered hard to get and I managed to get them that way , so the relief I felt because I got them and bought then home ! wonderful instand bond !
(and the fact when you buy them secondary normally the owner has them in hand ,so you dont have to wait like 6 months for my Unoa boy ) I hate waiting LOL