Do we choose the doll(s) or do the doll(s) choose us? ^_^;

my friend bought a doll for impulse and now she does not like the doll and the doll does not like her either , as for me my doll choose me our bond is strong, she even sleeps beside me everyday

its usually the doll chooses us or sometimes its we choose the doll

 

Sometimes a doll just doesn't work for me. I will try different combos of wigs and eyes and clothing. Nothing clicks. I'm having that problem with a doll right now. I bought a RS Yao a few months ago and for the most part she has been sitting in her box. Something that rarely happens in my house so it might be time to move on.

I don't think a doll chooses me. I've never been one to believe in the whole "my doll is real" thing. I think I get drawn to a certain doll because of their looks and the potential I see in them. Most of the time it works out.

 

I think for me, when I'm looking at dolls I'll only start saving up for one if I see it and I'm like "I have to have you"

 

Do your bjd(s) make you more or a great deal more social because they want to be out in the public a lot than you care to be?

Surprisingly, it's the other way around. My dolls seem to HATE meetups, gatherings, going out, standing up, and not letting their wigs fall off in public. The suddenly become kicky, floppy, and generally impossible to pose at all whenever I remove them from the house.

As for the rest of it, I bond with every doll I get in one way or another. I always see potential- either through modding, or face-ups or something. As long as I haven't had it too long, I can sell it- but once it's been home for a while, it's here to stay. I dunno... I just have a habit of being easy to please XD

 

definetely the dolls chose us i never had a choice and i always fell in love with them, so really the have chosen me ._.

 

Is the reason for bonding or not bonding because of bjd(s) choosing or your own? Why or Why not?
Do you feel as if your doll was meant for you or felt when you had the doll it was meant for another?
I think the sight of the doll in person determines how well I'll like it. However, if there are bad circumstances surrounding the doll, I may like it less. (For instance, if there's a problem with the company/seller or if the date I receive the doll corresponds to a bad event in my life.) I've never got a doll and felt like it was meant for someone else, but I guess these dolls are meant for whoever would appreciate them, so I guess this is true for those dolls I'm not 100% satisfied with.

Do doll collectors that have their bjd(s) for display do the choosing or do the doll(s) choose that option too?
Mine are for display only. I think this makes me want to choose only dolls I think are beautiful, whereas if I had characters, I might need one for a specific look that isn't necessarily attractive.

Do your bjd(s) make you more or a great deal more social because they want to be out in the public a lot than you care to be?
No, I never take my dolls anywhere.

Did your bjd(s) not like your face-up, even though it is really beautiful, and cause you to change it till that bjd(s) felt it is right for them and/or did similar actions happen with clothes choices, fashion styles, shoes, wigs, eyes, etc.?
Yes, definitely. It's actually difficult finding the right look for each doll. This is one reason I like fullsets. Planning how a doll will look is a bit stressful since so much money must be invested.

Has your bjd(s) ever changed personalities, (like complete change from your original character creation), and/or their fashion style and refuse to wear the clothes they don't like anymore?
Mine don't have personalities, but I have given them completely different looks from what I'd planned once I see them in person. Also, I'd planned on a genderless doll being male, and then once I got the doll, I decided it should be female.

 

i'm for that the dolls choose us, because its that kind of feeling i have when i see a doll.
The doll completly charm me and i cannot take her/him of my head

 

I only have one doll right now. I'm not sure how to answer the questions, other than to say I had a character in mind and I sought out a doll that specifically matched the emotions I felt he should convey with his facial expression and body style. I found that doll, a perfect fit, and he's just beautiful to me.

I've ordered 3 more dolls recently, and hoping they all arrive within the next few weeks. I'm very interested to experiment with this concept of "bonding." I just can not imagine buying a doll that cost hundreds of dollars, and then deciding I don't love him enough to keep him.

 

Is the reason for bonding or not bonding because of bjd(s) choosing or your own? Why or Why not?

I don't do the whole bonding thing. I either like the doll or I don't. We only work off of pictures for the most part when we buy dolls, so we have no idea how we are going to react once we have it in person. If I don't like the doll upon receiving it, there's no point in keeping it.

Do you feel as if your doll was meant for you or felt when you had the doll it was meant for another?

When I sell a doll, I am glad to sell it on to someone who will enjoy owning it more and try to recoup at least some of the money I spent on it.

Do your bjd(s) make you more or a great deal more social because they want to be out in the public a lot than you care to be?

I've made a few friends from the doll hobby because we have more in common than just dolls, so there is that, but it hasn't made me any more social than I am in other areas. I usually like going to doll meets, but I also like going to anime conventions and the like.

Did your bjd(s) not like your face-up, even though it is really beautiful, and cause you to change it till that bjd(s) felt it is right for them and/or did similar actions happen with clothes choices, fashion styles, shoes, wigs, eyes, etc.?

I buy dolls for specific characters, so if I get it and the faceup is not right for the character but otherwise I think the doll is right for said character, I will have the faceup changed until it is right. The doll has no say in the matter, it's more my picky eyes wanting things to look right for what I have in my head. They also are dressed according to how the character would dress.

Has your bjd(s) ever changed personalities, (like complete change from your original character creation), and/or their fashion style and refuse to wear the clothes they don't like anymore?

Nope. They stay who I want them to stay, unless of course I think they are not working as the character I want them to be and then I sell them and search for a new one to be that character. I also sometimes just grow bored of dolls and sell them.

 

I hope we all know that Kim just stated the reality in the situation, yes? Otherwise we're all a bit more crazy than we already suspected .

But since I'm also a firm believer in the magic that is play, and that there is a spark of the creative force (however you care to believe in it) in all things that exist, I choose to to suspend disbelief and often enjoy the dolls as if they were alive. Saves time and doesn't harm a soul. (ETA: I should state that some of them never feel "alive" to me... those are the ones that move along.)

I think I've had nearly all of the experiences our OP asked about and that others have mentioned.

* I chose my first doll, but he was one of about four or five of this huge group who "told me" his name. It was a perfectly eerie thing the first time it happened, but I'm getting used to it over time -- the dolls you look at and suddenly there is a name in your head that will NOT go away! Then there are the dolls who "chose" me, as in I kept coming across them in the marketplace or otherwise online and when I finally contacted the seller it was with "Ok, I give up..."

* I made a mad dash for the money when one of my former dolls appeared on the Marketplace, because I knew he was just Perfect. But the thing I had missed in the mental calculation there was that he was Perfect for one of my closest friends. No matter what I tried for him, he didn't work for me (just looked cranky all the time); but when he went to her, he fit right in there. That's what I was reacting to... he "chose" her, and I was simply the temporary medium (Now doesn't THAT sound insane!). And the postscript to that is that the doll she swapped for him has now also made his way back to her. As much as I adored him, he never seemed content here, and nothing I did helped.

* I've bought some very expensive and very beautiful dolls, or dolls that were very carefully thought through because they would fit with my collection, that when they got here did nothing whatsoever for me. Sat there like big expensive lumps of gorgeously rendered plastic. I chose them and I chose poorly; so they moved on to other people who were excited to have them.

* Yes, I've had some dolls switch personalities over time and with changes of costume, but those are changes I've decided on myself. I have had some who "refused" to wear certain clothing or wigs. I know it's really just a matter of what works in my eyes, but it's happened!

And no, the dolls haven't changed my state of socializing. Or lack thereof .

 

Is the reason for bonding or not bonding because of bjd(s) choosing or your own? Why or Why not?
I think it goes both ways. It reminds me of looking for an apartment. Sometimes, all the stars just line up. Other times, it can seem very good but just not *quite* right.
I agree w/other responders on this thread that going off pictures vs. seeing the dolls IRL may have something to do with it too. I'm a very tactile person so I need extensive 'handling' time to really evaluate whether a doll belongs in our family.

Do you feel as if your doll was meant for you or felt when you had the doll it was meant for another?
I'd definitely felt the 'meant for me' when a series of missed-it-then-available-again events led me to get Little Red.

Do your bjd(s) make you more or a great deal more social because they want to be out in the public a lot than you care to be?
Naw. I'm fairly social already so it's just another aspect with a different crowd.

Did your bjd(s) not like your face-up, even though it is really beautiful, and cause you to change it till that bjd(s) felt it is right for them and/or did similar actions happen with clothes choices, fashion styles, shoes, wigs, eyes, etc.?
Yes. I got a Dali recently and just cannot *stand* the default faceup. It's a weird shade of bright/neon orange that doesn't work for me so re-faceup'd, she will be.

Has your bjd(s) ever changed personalities, (like complete change from your original character creation), and/or their fashion style and refuse to wear the clothes they don't like anymore?
Not yet but it may be too early to tell.

Mme. duBunny

 

Humm, it would be a lot easier if the dolls would pick me, so I would not have to agonize over the vast array of choices available. Sigh, a list of dolls wanting to come home, in order of priority, would actually be nice!

I have had some dolls that did not work out so I sold them, and the ones I have, I'm extremely happy with. It is hard to judge a doll by pictures alone. Seeing and holding one does makes all the difference for me.

Only thing is, the dolls are changing my likes and dislikes (or are they bringing out my real personality?)!
It seems that fantasy dolls are choosing me (lately) as I did NOT set out to get any of them!

 

Depends on what day it is. XD

My girl hasn't seen public eyes yet, but she doesn't mind guests over. Not many people in our area have BJDs so I don't know how that will go down. She likes to be in the spotlight when it comes to new people. x] Hopefully, for the new doll I'm planning to get, there won't be any jealousy issues. >.>

Yeah... At first, during the first faceup it was nerve-racking for both of us. Then it was the indecisiveness with the new faceup (has yet to be done). For fashion, I think she enjoyed the clothes. They suited her very nicely. ^^

Yeah. XD Her personality changed the moment I got her. Her eyes make her intimidating but get on her "good side" and she won't creep you out. XDXD She's very lazy and keeps falling down when I stand her up, it's very frustrating at times too during the restringing. ;^; She's a snuddler though. I think of her like a Sourpatch kid. "First they're sour, then they're sweet."

 

I have been collecting dolls for a few years now and only recently gotten into bjds so I cannot say with them more than the one I already have.

With the other dolls it seemed like if I chose them based on someone else's being really lovely, they wouldn't end up staying or I didn't bond with them at all. I would love other people's photos of them but they weren't a right fit for me.

As for my one bjd I truly believe she chose me. I loved her face, I researched her and when she arrived I was instantly smitten. I also believe my next one has already chosen me. So hopefully it will work out just as well as the first.

I have heard people say that they changed them a bit though and ended up liking whatever they didn't like to begin with.

 

I have one doll that I strongly feel chose me. I know intellectually that they are inanimate, but I am a feeling-person (as compared to a thinking person) with a stronger imagination than my grip on reality. Haaa The first doll that made me want to have a bjd was a Binli. She has a tenderness in the pictures of her that gave me this yearning for her. But I also see this knowing connection coming from her. This is an older doll, but very soon after I got my first doll, a second-hand Binli became available at a very low price. I would have paid a high price for her at that time!

I still have this little back story in my head that she has a connection to other dolls that want to be here. No matter where those dolls might be around the world. The other one I feel this strongest with is a Serendipity Alice. Again, older make doll. But I'm an older make human too. ^^

My Alice has a broken finger and that just made her all the more mine. The finger was repaired and it is just a tiny hair line crack. I won't go into all the personal details, but I see many of my life experiences being shared and understood by her. Right now I think I would want her and the Binli to go with me to "the home" when I'm ancient in age. Heh. I don't think they will let me go without them.

Some dolls wake up my imagination and others just look like dolls. Maybe it is the photography. I haven't had a chance to see any doll in person before buying it. When I finally have time for them, I hope to do a lot of things with my dolls. I expect at that time I will connect with some more than others, and the others will be sent to new homes. Many of my dolls I choose/or they choose? because I want to express my artistic nature with them. Some will remain here, and I hope many will choose someone else.