Do you feel that ABJD's compensate for something you don't have IRL?

I think my dolls represent parts of me I lack or really desire, eg: incredible beauty and histories that don't bind them to suffocating laws and cultural norms. To me they are gorgeous free spirits that aren't tied down by the expectations of others.

 

Nope, not at all. >D
Except a little resin pen0r, prolly. >_>
But I don't think I'd want THAT IRL, actually. >.<
I'm not the skinniest twig around, but being Asian and naturally petite does have its merits. xD so looks-wise, nope, not a compensation...
Perhaps the freedom to dress up in anything? XD oooh, I would totally wear full suits everyday, but the weather here is LE AWFUL.

 

I'm from Sg too, and yes, the weather is way hot. I'll love to dress in some of the wonderful clothes designed for BJDs. Since they can't complain about the heat however, I shall dress them in those outfits to compensate for my intolerance of heat.

 

I don't know if "compensate" is exactly the right word for me, but my dolls definitely give me something that i don't have in real life but really do yearn for. Odd as it may sound, my dolls are my stand-in babies until I can have my own.

I'm very young but I just love babies, and every time I see one I wish I could take it home. I was 10 years old when my mother had my little sister, so I'm perfectly aware that babies are not idyllic little soft bundles of joy, but I feel how I feel. So for now, I have my dolls. This is probably the reason that all of my dolls except one look like they are under 12, and my favorite dolls are the ones that look the most baby-like my puki pipi, Alice. I absolutely spoil her rotten!

 

i consider my dolls like an extention of myself

hyo shin is an half of me that IRL usually is hidden
is an elegant and beautiful girl
she know that she's beautiful and go get what she want

kurumi is more shy, wore mostly just jeans and t-shirts
do not smile much and she's scared of really doing what she want despite acting strong

they are quite opposite
maybe i would like to be like hyo shin while actually i'm more like kurumi ^^''

 

Do you feel that you 'and/or' others around you are using ABJD's to compensate for something you don't have IRL?

Yeah, definitely. Friends, a social life, the feeling of safety and welcome. I'll explain a bit of each.

In real life (off the internet) I don't have many friends at all. I have like, 2 people now that I can still call friends and we hardly talk anymore now that we aren't in school with each other. I've never been one to have many friends though, but a few very close ones were all I ever wanted. :3 My dolls aren't really the most social characters, though a few are chatty, but since joining this hobby I've gained another irreplaceable friend and many more online friends. My dolls are also my friends. I talk to them more than I talk to anyone else. When I come home I feel like I'm surrounded by a group of my closest friends. :3

Most of my dolls have backgrounds that are a bit less than perfect. Most have a reason to run or to hide or to be insecure. I am their safe haven, a place where they can feel safe and loved and protected. I've never felt that way. I sometimes wonder if I wasn't a bit neglected as a child. I don't hug or kiss my parents, and I haven't since I was about 6. I like like a hermit in my room by the computer all the time. I feel paranoid and insecure. Since adopting my dolls those feelings have faded a bit. They trigger my maternal instincts for sure. x3 I feel that they love me as much as I love them and it makes me feel good to care for them.

And yeah. I have practically no self esteem about my looks so it's nice to have pretty 'people' around me all the time.

I also have no doubt that my dolls compensate for much more than just the things I mentioned here. But they've changed my life for the better so I'm not going to get all huffy and deny it. >w<;

 

Do you feel that ABJD's compensate for something you don't have in IRL?

Not exactly.
Definitely my life would be a bit empty without them, since they're one of the hobbies I love the most (along with too many other things I like).
They make me feel better, but they're not my friends, they don't live with me, they belong to their own universe, representing characters which belong to the rpg world or to the stories I wrote for them.
I enjoy seeing my characters taking form, it's like they become somehow more "real". I love working hard in order to find the right mold for each of them.

 

hmm maybe a little as far as dress goes. I can't get away with the clothing or hair colour I want at my job or even outside of work. So it's nice to have dolls that can wear the clothes and hair that I can't!

 

I have friends, but none of them are really like me, so a bjd to me is like a little companion, who *if they were real* would be able to understand me and stuff... i guess like a brother ^^ I'm an only child...
Oh, and I'm really tomboyish, but I can't just go walking around in boy's clothes all the time (well.. . I could but it might be weird) so a boy doll would make up for the other side of style I have

 

Sort of. I'm a clothes horse, but I can't afford the fabulous outfits I want and I'm a rotten seamstress on a large scale. So, the dolls are my opportunity to make and dress vicariously. It helps that my first doll's persona is gearing up to be that of a magic-wielding dressmaker.

 

I have two reasons for having my doll.

The one I tell people most often is that this doll gives me the opportunity to practice pattern design and technical assembly of clothing on a scale that is far more affordable than human sized clothing.

The other reason is that I really enjoy having the doll around. I don't think she's compensating for anything in particular, but I'm open to the idea that my wanting her around me in the house could signify an irrational attachment. I have a wonderful husband, many friends who I care about deeply and I'm active in school, so I don't believe I'm missing anything I can put my finger on. This being said, this doll affects me in an inexplicably positive way. Between her and my bunnies, I don't feel as lonely when I'm in the house alone. This doesn't mean she's replacing a child or that I would choose spending time with her over time with a human friend. My love for this doll may very well be evidence of some hidden issue - detachment from my family, self-image issues, hidden desire to be a mother (despite my very vocal claims otherwise), but does it really matter? All hobbies are comfort of some sort or another, from windsurfing, to model trains, to writing fanfic. If I feel more comfortable, valuable, and happy in my life, even on a small scale, then let my hobby be the therapy it is.

Back to insisting publicly that the doll is just 1/3 scale dress form...

 

Do you feel that ABJD's compensate for something you don't have in IRL?

Yes! I am retirement age with two grown children...neither of which are cooperating and giving me grandchildren. The dolls have, in a sense, become my grandchildren. I have mostly 26-35cm and MSD-sized dolls. Their characters are children and teens. I truly love to change their wigs, clothing, etc. and "play" by making them things. They help my "grandmotherly" needs and my creative needs.

 

Ummm... I wrote out like... a page of my opinions... but I hate discussing stuff... I will just worry about what people will think or say... so I took it down... lol :P

 

As far as compensating for something I'm lacking IRL... not really. I just enjoy having them around to pretty up my day.

I can't sew as much for humans now since my free time has shrunk considerably from the transition from high school --> college/work. So it's kind of nice to have little ones around wearing outfits that I'd love to make and wear but can't.

It's just nice to be able to have them doing something that I can't very well do IRL.

 

Haha, I join to this opinion I love dolls and have many dolls during whole my life. And, possibly, it compensate my lack of sewing. I love sewing, especially small things.
I don't feel need to compensate anymore...

 

Definitely yes. I'm not like anyone else who can express themselves freely. I not pretty and I don't have that awesome figure or body. I dress simple just as my life. My ordinary and I'm not someone who can make you stand on your toes.

With these dolls, I found a sense of comfort. Love and acceptance. I also love the fact that I can vent or express my deepest feelings through them. Through the clothes I make them. The way I will fix their hair etc. I feel like they become a representation of the inner me inside that is exciting and fun. I'm really glad that I came to know this hobby. I'm so so glad. It's a healthy addiction! :3

 

Reading through all these thoughtful responses is really quite interesting. Wish I had the time to respond to them all!!

As for myself... I've always been a bit of a tomboy and I often wished I could be a boy. The biggest problem with this is that I have an hourglass shape that makes many guys noosebleed but is impossible to disguise... so there's really no way for me to dress boyishly or crossplay (trust me, I've tried). So part of the joy of having a BJD for me is simply the ability to dress him up in the clothes I can't wear.

Aside from the fashion, Shiro makes me feel like I have a connection to some beautiful fantasy place, something special that makes me more than just another human sometimes. I consider myself his guardian and protector. I don't consider him human or anything, rather he's something greater than human, the image of beauty. He gives me comfort when the world just looks pointless and ugly. I feel really blessed to have him ^^

 

hmmm i dont knwo... i like the inocence my doll portrays. I am a nude model for photography, and i see in my doll certain aspects i rather do... Lolita glamous for example, i would LOVE to do that , but i dont think we humans pull off that glam that well :P

 

The ability to wear pretty dresses. Because I do go ga-ga over beautiful dresses and skirts sometimes when I'm feeling particularly girly, but I absolutly despise wearing skirts and dresses because I find them really uncomfortable. And I do not have any desire to inflict poofy dresses on my future children without their consent, so dolls it is.

 

as a nursing student I have to take some psychology courses, as young children, usually girls, use dolls as a way to work through issues that come in our lives, be it reality or fantasy. In my opinion as an adult, for me, I like dolls to relax get back to what was fun as a child. I think it allows me to stay young at heart. I just wish my step daughter would play with dolls and try to get back some of her childhood, she is 23 with 2 children...