Do you feel that ABJD's compensate for something you don't have IRL?

Hmm interesting topic

Well for me I'm getting fantasy parts for my doll not to fully mod but optional if I wanted to give him hooved legs and horns one day. I think for me I'm always wishing that life was more interesting and not as suppressed by the accepted norms? For example most of us are directed towards the path of going to school, getting a job, starting a family. I mean I think someone can still be successful without all the schooling that society says we need, though it just feels like the easier path.

I guess what I mean is that I really do wish all those fantasy elements we see in movies and games exist since life would be so much more interesting, as humans I think we're the worst. We take lots and return almost nothing, I feel so worked up whenever I see more news on oil spills, and pollution issues.

Then there's the dress up element, I would never really wear any of the things I'd like my doll to wear since there would be no occasion for it, but I love seeing them put on. So my doll also is an extension of my dream closet not for myself lol

 

All my life i have been weird and have to deal with a lot of loneliness because of it. When i discovered that i could have little miniature friends that would be here for me whenever i needed them it was nice.
Plus i have always wished that i could be a fantastical creature of sorts, anything but human so it is nice to pretend sometimes...

 

I agree with you denkiva, my dolls let me express fashion I no longer live in or basically have gotten too old to wear any more.

 

i always wanted to adopt many children or just give children a home that have been moved from place to place.

 

I live in the U.S., which has become very hostile about race since the election of Barack Obama. As the political stage and everyday people are more openly racist, I find I want to create a small world that isn't like that in any form.

 

Well, I have a great love of fashion, though not most modern fashion. I love historical fashions and national costumes and historically inspired fashions such as Lolita fashion. I'd love to wear these clothes, but I'm not comfortable in my own skin. So for me, designing clothing compensates for something I don't have in real life. I'm able to make beauty and thus experience something I love less directly.

My doll, when I get her, will be a part of that. One huge justification for getting her is so that I can design for her and make her clothes. I don't have any close friends who are interested in the kind of designing I do, so I lack a model and a doll can't quit on me spontaneously or have to run off to rugby practice.

 

That's something I'm going to have the most fun with, I think.

re: compensation, I think Marnie is the fulfillment of my childhood desire for That One Perfect Doll. The older members of the studio audience will remember the fancy, frilly Italian dolls in the Sears Christmas wish books. Those were the impossible dream! Still, every year my older sister and I would pore over their photos and discuss their merits and choose our favorite. (I went looking for those dolls on the web not too long ago. Good grief! Not to step on friends, but they were hideous!)

So, yep. Pure childhood cupidity, belatedly fulfilled. Next year, an Easy Bake Oven!

 

I suppose so. I mean, I got her because I have fun and I just love them, but I guess deep in my heart I wish I could be as beautiful as she is. People may not realize it but I'm extremely self conscious, the characters I create in my head are all beautiful and slender and confident and can have any boy they please and usually have overcome tragedy. Their lives are exciting. Mine..isn't. At least not at this point in my life. So I try to use them as a means of excitement that I don't have and wish I did.

 

Thanks, this makes me happy I don't have to say it much myself. My characters are so unique with all the fantasy elements. If their world were to exist in real life, things may become somewhat mundane over time, but I still wish that kind of magic and wonder existed like that.

So, my dolls, my characters basically compensate for my perfect little world and I suppose I'm content enough that they get to experience it, it'd be a hell of a lot more exciting. ^__^

 

I think it all compensates for something you don't have irl...even if its something as simple as saying "compensation for not having anything THIS pretty to look at on a daily basis" albeit thats a vague example.

Yes...my dolls are compensating for the fact that irl I do not have a chinese man in my life named Trei, with two toned hair, a good sense of fashion, knows wushu, is a vegetarian and who loves power rangers as much as I did at age 6. Its so hard to find someone that fulfills all those qualifications...but if that person did exist I would probably save myself some money. If anyone knows someone like this please point me in their direction :3

 

MMMMM.....I could understand how some people have answered yes to this question, but I do not feel that way. I have seen women who get those baby dolls that look like actual sleeping babies, who treat them as such, and I see the similarities that some ABJD owners have to preening their dolls, buying them clothes that are more expensive than their own, etc. They can fill a void or make someone feel more beautiful.

Why do I buy them? I'm a nutso who think they look like awesome tiny people and i've always loved toys of all kinds LOL-to each their own

 

I never really thought about it... but yes, a little bit. It might sound a little bit shallow that clothes count as something "missing" from my life, but I suppose you could say I dress through my dolls. Since my family hasn't got a lot of money to throw around, I can't afford nearly as many pretty brand-spanking-new clothing items as I'd like, and when I first found dolls a huge part of the appeal was that I could make them clothes for a much lower cost than making myself clothes. I can't wear the things I want most of the times, so my dolls do it for me.

 

This is an interesting topic that I was thinking about recently. I'm about to order my second resin girl and I was asking myself "why". It's a lot of money. But she will represent a character, a close friend to my first one.

But deep down I wonder if there's more to it. I don't really socialize with many people. I only have a handful of close friends (they know about the dolls), of which only one lives nearby and my Father and (sorta) brother (long story) (they both also know about the dolls too). Outside of that I don't really talk to anyone else, not even relatives - they know very little about me. And of my friends we only talk seldomly on the phone or online. I've always been a pretty quiet type person. I had my toys growing up, and my art after and since.

I have also had a lot of deaths in my life over the last decade. My mother, two of the few relatives that I was close to, our dog and my last cat. Over that time I've started to stay at home more and more to the point that I don't go out pretty much at all anymore except to, say, go to the dentist. Luckily, I work from home running my own business. So it's all good.

Anyway, the point I'm trying to make is that I sometimes do wonder if I am buying these dolls to fill some loneliness that I hide from everyone that I "do" socialize with. Not only that... but dolls can't die. So maybe that offers some kind of comfort. I don't really talk to my dolls, but I feel better knowing they are always there.

Heh... I feel like this site sometimes is a therapy session. Maybe I shouldn't spill my guts so easily. >.>

 

I'm compensating for not having reasonable hobbies instead. =D

 

I definitely feel that my BJDs compensate for quite a lot in my life. Clothes that I will never be able to wear or fit, perfect skin that nobody has, you can change their looks whenever you feel like it....
They're sort of an "idol" of ideal beauty for me, my dolls. Something that I will never have or never bee, so I want to live vicariously through them.
The sense of "immortality" is there as well. Long after I'm gone, my dolls will still be around. And I know that whoever inherits them, will have the story of all my love, my hard work, and my passion. Like a living legacy of me.

 

I suppose in a way my dolls represent certain characteristics and features that I lack; however, I don't feel that they're compensating for me. I don't live through my dolls (although that might be fun) because my life doesn't live up to expectations.

 

My parents are supplying me with some money to buy a BJD.
To do "wish-fulfillment" that I didn't receive in all my other hobbies that eventually died because they rejected it, or an important part of the hobby.
Such as a pet. Or riding [horses].

 

I think this is a nice topic. It is always a good to reflect on one’s life and the things in it regardless. In general I feel dolls address a very human need. I’m pretty certain most cultures makes dolls. I’m not sure a culture has been found that hasn’t. Doll making has probably been around since cavemen days. Whether it be stick tied in a human form or the BJDs we have today, it is something indicative and special to humans. Obviously the need for them varies.

As for myself, compensation is a way of life, but I like to think I make up for that, not my dolls. They do help me creatively when I draw, paint, or sew. They help me visualize characters I want to make, and enjoy my down time. They live in a world that I can never, one that I have created, but I feel my real life is much more promising, though at times, not as enjoyable. I feel they are more of an outlet and a tool then anything.

 

with my male bjd, he will kind of compensate for my boyfriends absence(military). not in the way that i will go out on dates with my doll or anything, but to have a male in my life that i can cuddle, and spoil :3 also i will admit i never had that many male dolls and even when i had them, the ended up without shoes and shirts in no time ^^' i want to change that this time around.

and ophelia will have the body and style i only wish i could pull off...

 

To me, the dolls are a part of me that never existed but I had wanted it to. All my dolls are part of a supernatural world (witches). I'm a guy, so I can't wear dresses with ruffles and laces and other things I find to be elegant and beautiful. However, with my dolls, I can do that for them, for me. I wanted to be more beautiful, more appealing to the eye. Well, since that isn't what I was born with, then I guess I'll give that life to my dolls, my "children" and my artificial soul.